In a dark and sinister land, a great shaft of changing lights shone, and out of it stepped two beings. Two foxes wearing cloaks, one male, one female... and the female vomited shortly afterward.
"Yeah... I forgot to mention that mortals typically become nauseous when traveling the Bifrost Bridge." Loki said empathetically. "Truth be told... no I didn't actually get sick my first time, but even to gods it can be unnerving."
"Just... just remind me again where we are," Angela said.
"We, are in Middengard, the homeland of the Aesir," Loki said. "It's nice to see that Thor has actually improved some things since Ragnarok... there is the perpetual smell of horse gong for one thing."
"Right... you offered to show me to Idunn's Orchard. The place where you got those apples that made my grandparents better- oh I'm having a relapse!" Angela then started to vomit again.
"Audhumbla's udders! I didn't even know a mortal fox could throw up that much!" Loki said in surprise. "Let's just get a move on. And remember, don't remove your cloak. It's the only thing that's keeping Horndall from taking notice of us."
"Right... remind me again, how and why that's an issue?" Angela asked.
"Well was born from the union of Ulric and nine Giants, and was born with the ability to hear even grass and wool grow, so he got the job of keeping watch over Middengard. As for the why... well let's just say that out of all the gods, he was among those that took Baldur's death the hardest." Loki said. "And we were fated to kill each other during Ragnarok but that didn't happen... suffice it to say we have issues."
The two foxes then journeyed through the wilderness of Middengard. Keeping a wary eye for any ravens. Eventually, they arrived at an apple orchard, the apple trees at this orchard bore golden apples, and there was a modest-looking thatch cottage.
Angela was in awe of the apples. "These... these look like they're made from real gold." She said as she tried to pick up a fallen apple.
"Oh, they are." Loki cut off a part of the apple. "But Idunnian Apples are just as edible as other fruits."
"LOKI!" Bellowed a voice from the nearby cottage. It bellowed to a she-horse.
"Oh... speak of the Chaotic Ones," Loki muttered.
"Is that Idunn?" Angela asked as the horse marched towards them.
"You mind explainin' why you're here again?" Idunn demanded.
"Idunn, you've got more than enough apples for Thor's court, and frankly. I'm not spending another day doing chores in that deceptively sized house for you!" Loki said. "And besides, I brought uh... my betrothed."
"Another one?" Idunn said in disbelief.
"It's at least a thousand years since then!" Loki said indignantly. "And besides, this time I really mean to settle down."
"Which brings us to the real question. Why are you here?" Idunn demanded.
"I... I want to give Angela the Evig-Liv Elixir." Loki said.
Idunn looked surprised. "The Evig-Liv? To a mortal?" She said in shock.
"You mentioned that before we left, what is that?" Angela asked.
"It's what gives the Aesir their immortality. Envig-Liv is distilled from the apples and other golden fruits, it's what prevents us from dying from age or disease... although powerful enough weapons or magic can still injure or kill us. But that's beside the point." Loki said. "At any rate, I wish to give you some of the Envig-Liv to you, my love Angela."
Angela was a bit surprised by this. "What? But Loki I-"
"Angela, I want to spend the rest of eternity with you. I want to share my joys, my sorrows with you. And... and I couldn't bear the thought to lose you." Loki said earnestly.
"Nevermind that he treated every woman he ever met like gong, and let us not forget the times he took the form of a female and-"
"Oh, will you shut up you rambling nag?!" Angela angrily shouted. "I know all about Loki's past, and it changes nothing! I love this mammal, and he's changed for the better. Now... either give the Envig-Liv, or we're leaving."
"Fine... I'll get a bottle," Idunn said as she went into the cottage.
XXXX
Eventually, the two foxes returned home. Specifically Loki's house in Forestvale. "I tell you it's a miracle that this place wasn't destroyed during the battle and-" he then noticed that Angela was vomiting again. "-at some point I should look into some sort of medication for Bifrost Sickness. Not for profit's sake mind you. Just because this... this is getting tiresome."
"Oh... you don't know the half of it Loki," Angela said, looking as nauseous as she felt. "Can... can I just take the Evig-Liv now?"
"I would, but knowing some of the Aesir as I do. It's probably laced with some kind of curse just to spite me by proxy." Loki said as he looked over the elixir bottle. "Long story short, I got my stick stuck to this eagle that turned out to be a Giant. I panicked, he only agreed to let me go but only if I helped him kidnapped Idunn. And gods tend to hold a grudge, even fairly mild ones like Idunn can do something nasty." He then squinted at the bottle for a moment. "I was right, that horse did spike this."
"With what?" Angela said, her lower muzzle stained with vomit.
"A curse. If you use any divine powers for your own benefit, or in general do anything I did before Ragnarok. You'll suffer from intense pains... specifically the kind that are synonymous to child-birth." Loki said.
"You... you can tell that just by looking at that bottle? There isn't even a clear label on that thing." Angela said.
"Trust me, a god can figure these things out," Loki said. "Point is if you take this. You'll be cursed with the pains of childbirth if you use your powers for... well not objectively good. And believe me, those are NOT pains you want to go through. Especially if you do something as petty as just be angry with someone who has it coming."
"I see... give me the elixir," Angela demanded.
"What? But this thing is basically a dud, it would make a god for certain but-"
"But I want to be with you, forever and always," Angela said. "If I have to keep up being a good person for the rest of that forever. Then so be it." She then took the bottle and drank its contents. "Wow! This tastes like honey and the first day of spring and my first kiss all rolled into one." She said with a look of joy on her face. "And there's the after taste... not the best apple cider I've had mind you."
Then Angela started to glow with ethereal light. "Well cut off my tail and call me a troll. You're a goddess!"
"Didn't you always say I was one before?" Angela said teasingly.
"True, but now it's well and truly official," Loki said.
XXXX
"And that's basically what happened." Loki finished explaining, as both he and Angela were on a double-date with Nick and Judy.
Judy just looked confused, while Nick looked like he was ready to maul Loki's face off. "Okay... cool... my sister's an immortal goddess," Nick said through clenched teeth.
"Nick. Take deep breaths." Judy said to her husband.
"Look, Nick, I chose this," Angela said. "I wanted to become a goddess. You know that I've proposed to Loki on New Year's Eve. I want to be with him forever."
"Okay, but... for the sake of argument. Anna forsook her Vampirism and immortality to be with Davies. Why couldn't you do that Loki?" Judy asked.
Loki rolled his eyes. "For one thing, like all gods, I'm terrified of death. Both any personifications of the force, and the act of dying in-and-of-itself. Secondly... Angela are you enjoying your meal?-"
"I was diagnosed with a terminal illness. I got the call shortly after Loki proposed." Angela interrupted.
"Yeah... and in the panic, I used up every magical cure I had on hand. But for the life of me, nothing worked. I'll be honest, despite what the doctor said I'm more than certain the disease was of a magical nature. Really powerful stuff at that, even Ulric in his prime couldn't make a sickness without some kind of cure." Loki explained. "And the only cure I could think of was the Envig-Liv Elixir. I mean I figured going in that Idunn would curse it... but the risk was too great."
"And you didn't think to check BEFORE that?" Nick snarled.
"Middengard is dangerous for me to linger in, even with the cloaks that hid us from Horndalls sight he'd eventually catch on to our presence, and he'd figure out why we were visiting Idunn. The point is there wasn't as much time as I would've liked!" Loki said.
"Nick. Remember your blood pressure." Judy said to her husband, keeping a firm grip around his wrist. "Look... couldn't there have a less drastic way to save Angela's life? And Angela, you're going to end up outliving your family, everyone you care about."
"Technically yes, but they'd arguably be worse. And that's what I told her, but this woman is adamant... literally, this woman is pretty much made of adamantine." Loki said.
"Well that is true, won't deny that," Nick said without the suppressed rage he had been feeling. "But really godhood for... what was it you had exactly?"
"Reynards Disease," Angela said flatly.
"Okay... that's actually a fair point," Nick admitted.
"Can someone fill in the clueless bunny here?" Judy asked. Nick then whispered into Judy's ear. She then started looking sick from her husband's description.
"Easy there, we haven't even gotten our food yet," Loki said cautiously.
XXXX
Roughly a week later, Loki was in his study in Forestvale home. Then is adopted robot-rabbit daughter Sierra Ultima entered. "Loki, what is the matter? You haven't left this room since your night out in Zootopia."
"Kid, this whole ordeal has been fishy. Raynaud's Disease is one of the rarest diseases for a fox to contract." Loki said as he looked over a book. "The only way to get it is... well from Raynard. And that only activates on his whim."
"What is the status of Raynard?" Sierra Ultima asked.
"Last I was aware he was locked away in the bowels of World Tree for his misdeeds. But he has escaped now and again to reek chaos in Mamgard... sort of like me back in my day." Loki said.
"Loki, are you saying that Angela was assaulted by Raynard when she was in high school?" Sierra Ultima asked.
"Honestly, it wouldn't surprise if that were the case. But what's bothering me is that none of my magical cures worked on it. Even Raynards Disease should have been vincible to my potions! By Zeus's loins, Kvasir's blood could cure anything, and the only major side effect would be to speak in rhyme. And the rest of my potions were made by Eir, the goddess of medicine, there isn't a disease in Mamgard or beyond that can't be cured by her elixirs!" Loki ranted.
"You are right. By all logic, she should have been cured of Raynard's Disease before the Envig-Liv elixir became necessary." Sierra Ultima noted.
"Exactly, and before you ask. I already tried to take her to an appointment to Eir... but she threw me out of her office before I could explain why I was there." Loki groaned in frustration. "I just don't want to risk messing up with her as I did with all of my previous wives!"
"Loki, please." Sierra Ultima pleaded. "You do love Angela. You have striven to be a better mammal all and all. Regardless of the circumstances of her current existence, things have to get better."
Loki looked exhausted. "I'm just so baffled about how this happened! As I said, Raynard's Disease could be cured by pretty much any magic... oh... what are you doing here?" He said, taking notice of a familiar-looking spider-like creature.
"The reason that Ms. Wildes condition wasn't cured was that the Plot demanded it," Clancy said.
"Excuse us?" Sierra Ultima asked.
"The Plot can expand or contract life, the Plot can expand or contract life. The Plot. Must. Flow." Clancy said.
"Are you claiming responsibility for this?" Loki demanded.
"Negative. I'd explain in greater detail but, I'm fairly certain you would either go insane or be in complete denial about it." Clancy said.
"You know something... since Ragnarok, in addition to rethinking my life and the numerous bad choices that led me to be bound in the entrails of one of my own sons and having venom dripped in my eyes till the end of days. I've also learned that mortals loath and despise cryptic nonsense that we gods are so famous for." Loki rambled. "So now you're going to give me a straight answer." He then grabbed Clancy. "What is this 'Plot' your talking about? Why was Angela's disease rendered impossible to cure? How are you involved in this?" Loki said menacingly to the robotic spider time machine.
"Emergency time jump!" Clancy then disappeared.
"Should I alert our friends regarding Clancy?" Sierra Ultima asked.
"My adoptive daughter... I'm honestly hurt that you have to ask that." Loki said. "With luck, Angela won't react... too badly."
XXXX
Angela was roaring with blind anger after Loki had finished explaining the situation to her. "I'll be honest, you're taking the news a lot better than I was expecting." He said as his fiance turned into a giant horned monster with bat wings. This 'rampage' didn't last long enough to cause any serious damage as she started convulsing on the ground with intense pain. "Wow, that curse was even less lenient than I thought. Not often that I'm wrong about these things."
"Why... why me?" Angela sobbed as she turned back into her mortal form. "Why do these things keep happening to me?"
"I'm sorry my love... I'm truly sorry about all of this." Loki said, hugging Angela. "But we'll find a way. There is always a way forward. Of all things I've learned regarding mortals, that is one thing I've come to respect about them."
"And apparently... I can't even express myself properly. Or I'll feel like a rabid melon is trying to claw out of my stomach!" Angela wailed.
"There are better ways to express pain like that... you liked to paint in your youth right?" Loki said.
"Yeah... yeah, I think I can take up painting again," Angela said, she got up and, after waving her arms. Conjured some art supplies from thin air. "Now comes the hard part of any creative project... actually making the thing." She said as she sat at the easel she conjured down to ponder on what to make.
"Well, I'll come by later to check up on you... and hope you've made something." Loki said as he left Angela's home.