CHAPTER XII: SURROGATE

"So...she's...your daughter..." Aura whispers from her seat while watching Grace consume every piece of food on their wooden table. No matter how many times we try to teach her how to eat properly, she always ends up sitting on the table latching onto everything edible with her tentacled arms and legs. I look over at Mare who's mesmerized at how quickly and accurately Grace grabs entire plates of food, shoves each item on the plate into her fanged maw, and moves onto the next item in quick motions. Watching her consume multiple times her weight had become so common a sight that I wasn't dumbstruck anymore but before I can answer Aura's question, Shalltear states with amusement, "Yeah... and we have no idea where she puts all of the food she eats..."

Cocytus exhales cold mist quietly from his position near the table and for a brief moment, I'd forgotten he's standing there given how quiet and inconspicuous he's being. I point at my left palm with my right index finger and gesture towards Grace with the left hand, hoping that Cocytus understands my gesture. He timidly extends his left arms towards Grace who drops everything she's doing with staggering speed and latches onto his forearm with her limbs. Her form collapses into misty water that flows up his forearm towards his shoulder, the mist spiralling around his limb enthusiastically before climbing up onto his head. The misty form condenses into a solid childlike form that sits on his head as she shouts, "Grampa!"

I'm relieved that she remembered some of the things we taught her and didn't try to absorb nutrients from him immediately. However, that relief doesn't last long because tentacle limbs partially covering half of Cocytus' eyes and some of her body is tapping his head in an attempt to break through the tough chitin. I wince when I see her get creative and slide thin tendrils into one of his eye sockets, the limb burrowing through the soft tissue painfully slowly. My body is already trying to rise to get Grace off his head but Shalltear puts a hand on my shoulder and sits me back down forcefully, whispering as she does so, "Just watch."

I do as she says and quietly watch Cocytus remain stoic and calm even as black tendrils enter the gaps between his eyes and chitin. There is no blood to flow down his face because what blood comes out is eagerly fed upon. Grace seems oblivious of her actions as Cocytus grates to us, "She requires living nutrients to absorb information from. Feeding her cooked food does nothing for her."

"How can you act like this is normal and how do you know all of that so readily?" Shalltear interjects as she watches Grace start to shift slightly. Parts of her body become completely solid sporadically, resembling pale flesh among patches of dark jelly. Her arms shift between tentacles, chitinous claws, and normals hands while her feet do the same yet she remains oblivious to what she's doing. Cocytus remains utterly focused on the conversation, grating after exhaling cold mist, "I have been tested in combat against such beings before and know of their complex anatomy. If I am correct, what she truly needs is a living host and particularly, their shadow, to gain a proper form-"

"I'll do it," Mare interjects far too readily, all of us turning to him as he springs to his feet and rounds the table at a brisque walk. Aura tries to talk him down but he clearly isn't listening and as soon as he extends his hand towards Grace, she violently retracts her tentacles from Cocytus' flesh and latches onto his right arm. Cocytus freezes over the wounds near his eyes as Grace spirals around Mare's arm towards his shoulder, continuing down his torso to his legs and feet. Mare closes his eyes and starts shaking slightly as if cold once Grace enters his shadow and Aura quickly rises and rounds the table towards him. As she approaches, Mare extends his shaking hand left hand outwards, trying to point it at her but failing as he stutters, "No... let her... do it..."

"You can't just accept her presence like that without preparation!" Aura snaps while continuing her advance, halting tensely when something starts to rise out of Mare's shadow. I was accustomed to watching Grace shift between solids, liquids, and gases at random but what rises from Mare's shadow is fleshy, pale and coherent. The shadows slide off her face, revealing a pale complexion identical to her mothers yet with hints of my own. Her hair flows to her shoulders, the lustrous brown dazzling heavily contrasting the pale skin. Her eyes open slowly to reveal one eye of normal brown but another eye that's a cluster of shadows with crimson light dancing within. I quickly look away when the rest of her starts to form but Shalltear shoves my left shoulder playfully and states, "What's the matter? It isn't like you haven't seen a naked woman before."

"She's my daughter... I still have shame," I reply while looking away but Shalltear lifts my head and holds it in place to make me look. I close my eyes only to have her force them open but thankfully, Grace forms the shadows sliding along her skin into a simple black dress that covers her frame. She isn't taking after her mother in terms of proportions given the size of her chest and hips, a thought that makes me loathe myself for allowing it to form.

My gaze is drawn to Mare who's sweating and breathing roughly during the procedure even as Grace finally disconnects from his shadow. Mare goes limp and starts falling but he never touches the ground. Grace's movements are so precise and subtle that it takes a few seconds for my brain to register her turning around and catching him mid-fall. She gently places him on the ground and sits down next to him, taking his right hand in her own as if trying to comfort him.

"She is truly gifted," Cocytus grates with a nod and an exhale of cold mist but I'm more concerned about Mare struggling to breathe and shaking uncontrollably on the floor. Aura crouches down and feels Mare's forehead, pulling it away while snapping at him, "I told you not to and you did it anyway! Look what you did to yourself!"

Mare doesn't reply or open his eyes but before Aura can do anything, Grace presses her left hand against Mare's forehead, mumbling something that I can't hear. Aura takes a step back as Mare's body starts to glow a brilliant white, the radiance consuming him and forcing me to look away. I ask with concern as I try to blink away retinal pain, "I can't see what's happening. Is Mare okay?"

I hear Mare gasp and take the risk to look in his direction, thankful that the light had dimmed enough for me to see. Grace slowly lifts Mare by his right arm into a sitting position but the being that rises from the floor is different from the one that went down. His proportions are similar to when he uses his Perfect Illusion ring but with subtle changes. His hair is long and flows down his chest in two braids, the front section cut to prevent it from covering his face. His face has similar features but with more neutrality of gender and his clothes are altered to match his new physique. Mare looks down at himself and his arms, saying to Grace with wonder in his voice, "How did you know?"

His voice is neither masculine nor feminine but doesn't have a higher pitch. Aura loses her anger and gains ample amounts of curiosity, her expression excited as she pats Mare down and inspects him visually and tactilely. Mare seems uncomfortable with the sudden attention he's receiving from everyone and tries to get to his feet but stumbles midway through rising. Grace helps him the rest of the way and for the first time since the strange event has started, I appreciate just how tall she is with a physical form. Even though Mare has the body and height of a young adult, Grace is a clear head taller than him which mean she's a head taller than me as well.

Aura's head only comes up to Mare's stomach once he's standing but as she looks up at the two of them, Grace touches her forehead while mumbles something. I look away quickly to avoid the sudden burst of light, hoping that Aura doesn't suffer the same weakness that Mare is suffering as I wait out the storm of light. Since I'd turned to the left to avoid the light, I catch Shalltear staring directly into the light, undisturbed by the glare but wearing a facial expression of worry.

When I'm able to look back, the childlike Aura is gone and is replaced by an athletic woman who explores her ample chest and frame with her hands recklessly. A wide grin is on her face as she rubs and pats herself but she stops mid exploration to ask with a frown and a hint of annoyance, "This is irreversible, isn't it?"

Grace nods once and Aura groans in annoyance before replying swiftly, "Now I need to buy new clothes and new equipment for both of us as well as renovate the house to match our new physique. I hope you're happy with yourself, Mare."

"Is it wrong to say that I am?" he replies as if challenging her, Aura turning to face him and dropping some of her good humour to glare at him hostilely. Mare glares back and by the way that they're posturing at each other, I start to believe that they'll come to blows. Shockingly, Mare is the first to throw a punch but Aura sees his intent and angles her head enough to avoid the blow. She gives Mare a wild, feral, and angry grin as she shoves him onto his back with both hands with enough force to slide him along the wooden ground.

Whatever calm Grace has is lost as she floats protectively in front of where he stops sliding, the blankness of her facial expression mismatching the dark magic radiating from her skin in black tendrils. Aura snorts from the display and snaps at Grace, "I figured it was like that now. I'm not going to hurt your precious host... at least, not without him deserving it. You can calm down now."

Aura leans slightly to the right so she can glare at Mare who's picking himself up off the ground. They exchange a look of hostility as Aura states coldly, "This isn't over but we'll talk about this later. Go do whatever it is you're going to do."

"Fine!" he snaps back as he turns towards the stairs. Grace follows him by floating rather than walking and parts of her body slide away sporadically into shadowy mist before reforming back in flesh. She stops and looks back at us as if unsure of herself but Aura waves her angrily away, telling her to get going. Grace floats upwards towards the wooden ceiling and glides through it, leaving me staring at the ceiling in confusion. Aura groans at those left as she puts a hand to her face, "Okay... I need some time to process all of this... can you guys... give me a minute or something?"

Cocytus is the first to rise from his chair and form a gate with his left hand, leaving the gathering without another word. Shalltear does the same but when I try to follow her, she turns slightly and stops me from following her with her right hand. She states with an odd smile, "You're staying here. You two have plenty to talk about."

She waves with her right fingers as she steps through and slams the gate shut behind her, leaving me confused and uncertain. My sense of danger flares as I turn rapidly back to Aura who's no longer on the other side of the table. I don't have enough time to avoid getting punched in the left cheek, her right hook vicious and without mercy. There's enough force behind the blow to send me to the ground hard as she shouts at me, "That's for always breaking your promises, you jerk!"

"Why do you always do this!? Can't we talk about these things instead of fighting about it!?" I shout back, the pain of my face only making me angrier. I grunt in frustration as I stamp down the emotion, thinking that she probably hit me to make me react with further violence. When she sees that I'm not reacting as she wants, she shouts at me, "I would if you actually came to visit us! You always spend all your time with her!"

I reorient myself by moving into a crouching position but such a position doesn't offer much resistance to attack. She quickly leaps and does her manoeuvre and with practised grace, both of her feet slamming into my chest and sending me tumbling until I make face first contact with their wooden cabinets. I turn around disoriented and watch her charge at me but I have enough time to block another kick with my forearms.

Aura isn't the type of person to leave an opponent with chances to defend themself but at this moment, she's clearly waiting for me to be oriented properly and is holding back. I block several more kicks before replying angrily with, "That may be true but if you keep this up, I won't have a reason to visit at all! I don't want to get beaten every time I show up!"

"So this is my fault now!?" Aura shouts at me mid-kick, her foot finally coming to rest after another kick as she crosses her arms across her chest. I move into a sitting position as I release a pent up breath through my nose, exhaustion descending on me from the emotional and physical drain. A mixture of frustration, anger, and disappointment colours my words as I hiss, "It's your fault that you can't stop yourself from hitting me. I get that I haven't been at my best but this feels too extreme a response-"

"And how am I supposed to respond!? How am I supposed to respond to all the things you keep putting me through!" she shouts but I'm glad that she's trying to restrain her urge to lash out. My forearms rise in front of me when she finally fails, blocking another right kick aimed at my face. I lose my patience and my civility at that moment, frustrated by the entire scenario to the point where I shout at her, "What do you want from me!? Just be direct for a change!"

"Why!? You're never direct with your intentions with me! Why should I be so direct with you!?" she shouts back as I get to my feet slowly, shaking my arms to try and get rid of some of the soreness. Whatever restraint I'm trying to maintain is lost and the floodgate of anger opens wide to unleash what's behind it. I growl with the voice of the dragon within and hiss at her, "Fine...fine! I'll be direct! I never wanted any of this for any of you! I was supposed to die back in Irlo and be forgotten like the others!"

I feel my hands and feet become talon-like, clenching my hands hard enough to cut my palms open. Aura's anger is having a hard time maintaining itself but I don't care what she wants anymore. I shout at her with growing fury, "I was forced to live! I was forced into a life of suffering and pain! I never really wanted answers because Roeray was the one asking all the questions for me! I only followed those leading because I thought it would lead to something besides more pain but it never did! I became that pain! All I do is cause suffering from everything I do!"

"Beric..." Aura whispers but I don't let her speak, shouting at her with a resonant voice, "So when I ask you what you want from me, at least do me the courtesy of giving me an answer! Don't just make me suffer needlessly trying to find an answer for you then keep everything to yourself anyways! I'm not anyone's plaything, especially yours!"

Something breaks in Aura's mind and she falls to her knees, her body slumping slightly forward. Tears fall from wide eyes staring intently at the floor and her new response is enough for my anger to lose immediate control. I throttle down the rage and crouch down in front of her, placing my hands on her shoulders and shaking her lightly to try and snap her out of her plight. I'm worried that I said something too harsh for her until she finally meets my gaze, her face distraught and fearful in a new way that horrified me.

All she can say to me is, "I'm just like my creator..."