"Well now, that wasn't very heroic."

Izuku's eyes met Shigaraki's, and he instantly felt a chill of dread travel down his spin at the sadistic, terrifying grin on the villain's face. If there was one villain, one mortal man Izuku could say he found creepier than any demon he'd encountered so far, it was Tomura Shigaraki.

The way his grin was far too wide, with his blood red eyes exposed for once leaving Izuku able to see the truly manic nature hidden behind them.

His mouth was dry and his teeth were white but jagged, clearly not even or fully clean and the bags under his eyes that only added to the shadows surrounding his expression of perverse delight at what he just witnessed made Izuku feel as though he was going to sick up.

Although really he wouldn't dare move, not with Shigaraki's fingers right around his neck. Following the USJ attack, they'd all been briefed on what the villains who had escaped seemed to be capable in case any of them ever ran into them again.

Izuku already remembered his quirk but he had an even better idea then he did at the USJ. And as if reading his thoughts, Shigaraki spoke the exact reason Izuku was doing his best to move nothing more than his eyes as he tried to think of a way out of this.

"Don't get any funny ideas. I see a single movement I don't like and my last finger comes down. I assume you remember what my quirk will do then, Midoriya." He said and the urge to throw up grew a lot stronger when he seemed to almost shudder with both anger and delight as he said Izuku's name, something truly insane in the way he said it.

Something that filled Izuku with a sense of dread no matter how much theoretically stronger he was then the man. The worst thing was Izuku knew it was true.

He couldn't use One For All, by the time he had a chance to try to run, Shigaraki would see the lightning and take out his neck. It would only take a second of disintegration for Shigaraki to kill Izuku if he wanted to.

Maybe combined with Far Lance he could deliver a blow that could knock the man back but Izuku felt a great hesitance in case things went wrong. For one, he could end up killing the villain and Izuku was still reeling from how easily he'd just killed Maul. He'd promised himself he'd never kill a mortal, never go to the dark side like that…

And if he did it now, right after Maul, that sparked a profound sense of dread in him about the consequences of what such an action would lead to. But even if he could safely hit Shigaraki, and get away, Shigaraki only needed to run a few feet to grab a hostage and kill them.

Even one causality was too much, and in such a small space Izuku couldn't guarantee he'd catch up in time for certain with any of his powers especially if Shigaraki meant business.

Did the general populace even know what Shigaraki looked like? It would likely come out, but even if he could guarantee a safe one on one fight… If it was seen there was still a potential for an amount of time where Izuku's public perception would become even worse just like Maul wanted, and that would include how he was seen by his friends, how he was seen by…

A stab at his heart reminded him now was most certainly not the time to think about Tooru and Kyoka, and he came to a simple conclusion. He wasn't going to kill Shigaraki, he couldn't safely fight him, and trying to escape this chokehold ran the risk of pissing Shigaraki off and making him more dangerous.

So Izuku had to stay put and talk. That was the only choice he had left.

"I remember." He gulped slightly, and Shigaraki nodded approvingly, turning Izuku to face him properly.

"Good, good. Now, how have you been?" He asked, but it was so obviously a false question. A question asked out of malice to spite Izuku, one that threw him for a loop but the answer escaped him before he could control his tongue.

"Better than your Nomu, I'll bet." It just came out, challenging, defiant. Shigaraki glared at him and the grip tightened. The remaining finger left to close down twitched… but didn't come.

"Funny. I'll admit your little surprise mini-boss encounter took me off-guard. I thought you were some little All Might follower when I saw you, so imagine my surprise when I came here to blow off steam and find you, in this… statement of an outfit murdering someone in cold blood. I'm impressed." He chuckled cruelly. Izuku had to will his marked hand to not twitch as the urge to do something rose.

"Fuck you." The anger ripped through him still, unable to be contained. Shigaraki didn't seem to care though, laughing more.

"Oh I like this new side to you, you're so angry. It's like looking in a mirror." Izuku felt the bile in his throat this time, as his eyes narrowed. "Oh come now, you don't have to hide from me, we're the same aren't we?"

"We're n-nothing alike."

"Whatever you have to delude yourself with to sleep at night. I didn't expect you to be on this side quest, but maybe you're just perfect for the party." The hell was he talking about now?! "Although I think you still have that annoying heroism in you right now."

"A-Always." Izuku tried to make it a confident statement but he faltered, as the weight of this situation settled in more as it went on. It was confusing and throwing him for a loop but one thing was for certain. Izuku's life was currently in Shigaraki's hands, and if he decided to end Izuku he'd likely not have a chance to stop it.

The urge to slip away became a lot stronger with that realization, and he had to struggle to remind himself the people out there, no matter how much they might not like him, couldn't just be left to die.

"We'll see." Shigaraki flashed his teeth again with his grin and his finger began to slowly inch neared, causing the magic teen's sweating to get worse as he tried to tame the primal flashes of fear constantly making everything else in his brain go blank. "Tell you what, I'll humor you. Answer my questions honestly, and I'll leave. Go home. No one dies."

Izuku felt a brief reprieve of hope surge through him, ready to answer whatever he had to, but then the caveat came through that brought all the fear rushing back.

"But if I think you're lying, bye bye neck, bye bye mall, and we'll see just how many happy little civilians will get to find out that heroes existing doesn't mean they're safe from anything before they die." Shigaraki hums, grinning right at Izuku. "Agreed?"

Everything screamed at him this was a bad idea, but it was the only chance he had to end this without risking Shigaraki killing him or others. He just had to hope the whims of a mad man were on his side.

"A-Agreed." Izuku met his eye. "W-What's your question?"

"….What do you have, what does Stain have… What do you both have that I don't?" He hissed quietly, making Izuku blink.

"W-What we have?"

"I should have stolen the show that night!" Shigaraki suddenly ranted and Izuku had to resist the urge to let out any kind of noise as in his angry exclamation Shigaraki's final finger had come to be barely an inch away from his throat. He could feel the tingles of his quirk ready to activate any moment. "My Nomu may not have been perfected but they rained chaos on Hosu, I caused chaos in the city, so why won't the NPCs react to it? All any of them care about is your little rant and Stain's idealogy! Those stupid Stain merchandise and when they get to anything else it's just rumors about you, nothing about my own work!"

"...They're selling Stain merch?" Izuku asked quietly, knowing he shouldn't be drawing focus away but it caught him off-guard. "They're celebrating him?!"

"Yes, it's pissing me off. Now you tell me why they do it!" Shigaraki demanded. Izuku took as deep a breath as he could without touching Shigaraki's finger with his throat.

"…Because they could see us. Because they could put faces to us and because they're too stupid to separate a person from an ideal." Izuku wasn't sure where this sudden declaration came from, although he believed it, yet the sheer conviction with which he had decided upon it had surprised him somewhat. "No one understands what you want, no one has seen who you are, just some foot soldiers running around mindlessly with no relation to you beyond some vague orders. No one cares about Tomura Shigaraki because they've never heard of him. And if they did, I guess they'd decide that if you had some half decent point you never even thought through to make some dolls with crusty exteriors and stitched on eye bags just to celebrate your one ideal you maybe have without thought because apparently none of them have the brain to separate what a person's words say compared to their actions and intentions!"

Izuku went wide eyed as he realized he was practically shouting near in the end, anger spilling out every word. He stopped and looked Shigaraki right in the eye. He'd fucked up!

He'd snapped on the villain who had his life in his hands! He was about to die-

"…So that's it… They've still got to find out what I stand for…" And he laughed once more, but somehow, this laugh was the cruelest and most unsettling of them all so far. "I'll make them know what I stand for. Thank you, Midoriya."

Izuku felt a pit in his stomach form, even as Shigaraki suddenly let go and backed off. He was suddenly safer, yet he felt so much worse. Because he'd given Shigaraki whatever it was he wanted and something about that left him dreading what he'd potentially just really done.

"Well then, as promised. I'll take my leave, with no deaths. Boring, but I'll make it work." He turned and began walking away, leaving Izuku confused. Wasn't Shigaraki supposed to be insane? He was actually keeping his word? Why?

He moved to follow but before he could, the wall came crumbling down from the store beside them creating a massive wall of rubble that Izuku couldn't get past, the wall was too high to Shade-walk through and the rubble too thick for Izuku to quickly blast through without risking injuring someone.

He heard Shigaraki say one last thing that left him immensely confused as the villain made his escape. "See you soon, brat."

And much to Izuku's anger, annoyance, fear and so much more, the villain escaped. He punched the rubble normally in annoyance before finally letting out a frustrated sigh and sinking to the ground, rubbing his hands against his face.

Now he really did have to hope Shigaraki kept his word. Fuck!

After a moment he got to his feet and quickly rushed to the other side, hoping to find some sign of where the villain went, hoping he could at least make sure he really hadn't done anything.

And it seemed, amazingly, he had. There was no destruction, not even anyone cower in fear or looking perturbed. No one seemed any the wiser to the threat they'd just had under their noses as at all.

Ignorance really was bliss, it seemed. Izuku swallowed and tried to think. What did he do now? What did he do now-

"Deku?" A quiet voice asked and he froze, before slowly turning and coming face to face with…

"Urachan? T-Todoroki? Uh… h-hi." He blinked, immediately feeling weird as he remembered what he was dressed like when he saw them looking him over. Ochaco seemed to be processing before she shook her head and managed a ghost of a smile.

"It's good to see you. Did you decide to come after all?" She asked, sounding somewhat hopeful which left a pit of guilt in him.

"N-Not exactly, I just needed to check on something and I could only do it here." He said vaguely, trying to think of what to do now. Had it always been this hard to talk to her? She was his first friend, hell one of his best friends. This should not be that difficult.

"…You're coming with us." Todoroki suddenly declared, making both Izuku and Ochaco turn to him confused.

"H-Huh?"

"Todoroki! You can't j-just make him." Ochaco quickly tried to chastise only for her point to fall on deaf ears when Todoroki pointed out a hero merchandise shop that was blended with a clothing store.

"We're going there." It was basically an order, and Todoroki made it clear he wasn't taking no for an answer when he basically forcibly steered Izuku in there.

"T-Todoroki! C-Come on you don't need me to j-join you-"

Then Todoroki said something that got Izuku to pause, because it had more emotion then he was used to from the heterochromatic teen. "But I need to help you, like you helped me."

"I-" He tried to think of how to reply but couldn't. He just didn't know how to react to that, beyond being touched in a way. Ochaco clearly thought the same based on her own reaction and so Izuku resigned himself to joining them. "O-Okay but stop pushing me at least."

"Done." Todoroki let go, before walking on completely unfazed and not looking at all like he was just struggling to push Izuku across the floor. The marked teen fell in line with Ochaco and they shared a look, before Izuku spoke.

"I… I'm s-sorry I've not texted you." He said quietly, worried she might be mad in her own way. Instead her response surprised and confused him.

"I'm sorry I didn't see sooner." She said suddenly, looking down. "I know I was your oldest friend here at U.A., so I should have realized something was wrong. I should have been there for you before-"

He quickly grabbed her arms, frowning and stopping her. "O-Ochaco, none of that was your fault. It was my own for bottling everything up."

"But maybe if I just noticed-" She tried to fight back only for Izuku to sigh and hug her properly. In fact, he was pretty sure it was the first time they had properly hugged. It was nice.

"You didn't, a-and that can't be helped. It's in the past." He assured, keeping his grip tight. "You're n-not just my o-oldest friend at U.A. Ochaco, since U.A. started… You were my first f-friend and you've pretty much been my b-best friend. It's going to take a lot m-more than missing something I w-was trying to hide to c-change that."

She took a deep breath before hugging him back, sighing. "I just… hate seeing you hurting. I swear… I won't let you hurt again. I promise."

He knew that wouldn't come to fruition, but he appreciated the sentiment none the less and silently conveyed as much by gently tightening his grasp.

"And I'll do my best to support you no matter what, whether you need help e-emotional, in school or even if you w-want a better dress-" Izuku sputtered at that and she giggled but it was kind of awkward. "I've never really had a friend who wanted to, you know, before but I'll do what I can to help. Should I say she now?"

"W-What-"

He looked down and realization settled in as his face went nuclear yet again. He hadn't even considered how she might take the outfit. "I promise I'll be as supportive as I can be, Deku!"

"I r-really appreciate the sentiment but I'm not trans!" He squeaked out shyly, hiding his face. "We j-just had a laundary incident at home and t-this was the only thing we could put t-together on short notice."

"O-Oh." Ochaco's permanent blush got worse, immediately waving her hands in front of her. "T-Then sorry! I didn't mean- But I still stand by it if you do, but I'm not-"

Izuku sputtered before they met each other's eyes, and something about the ridiculousness of it just clicked. And in a moment, they went from sputtering and stammering to laughing, a genuine, proper, friendly laugh together with nothing to taint it.

And in the corner of his eye, Izuku spotted Todoroki giving a rare smile In triumph because an All Might mannequin had fallen over and crushed a bunch of tiny cheap Endeavour figures.

In that moment, Izuku got something he could welcome amongst the chaos and suffering his life had been throwing at him. It really was the simple things in life sometimes, with your friends.

And it was nice to be reminded, just because he slipped didn't mean he didn't have friends. Supportive ones.

But the mirth faded with a sad thought that broke it down… If only he could connect with them properly like he used to. Something was off…

And he knew it had nothing to do with them.

After the mall incident, Izuku had gone home trying to use any distraction to not think about the events of the mall. He'd focused on his reminder of friendship with Todoroki and Ochaco, when that finally failed he tried to figure out the mystery of Shigaraki's words or even the futile mystery of where Maul had come from.

He'd contacted Tsukauchi eventually and though it had taken a lot of back and forth he'd made a compromise with the man for his encounter with Shigaraki to be put in as an anonymous tip with higher priority than have to come in and do a full interview.

He just couldn't handle one right now, and he couldn't handle the idea of the stress and worry it would put everyone else through. It was better if only he knew. He ignored the part of his brain that called him a hypocrite for bottling up again right after he'd told Ochaco that was what had caused his issues the first time.

But finally, the distractions ran out and his mind turned to the only topic it seemed to want to think about, Tooru and Kyoka. It wouldn't stop thinking about them every day, what had happened between them, how they thought of him, what might happen when they next meet and everything in between.

And every time he thought of it, his emotions seemed to decide on a new course. Sometimes, it would be nothing but an overwhelming, crippling sadness. A worry that he'd lost his chance for good.

Other times it would be a bitter happiness, glad they could at least have each other mixed with self-loathing about why he couldn't be part of it.

And though rarely, sometimes, just sometimes, he could even feel a small prickle of anger. He didn't think it was justified at all but his emotions couldn't be helped, and his emotions wanted to be angry sometimes that Tooru had taken Kyoka right after he'd confessed to her that he liked them both.

He knew Tooru, he knew it was no kind of slight. He likely wasn't even meant to know.

But he did and it stung. It stung a lot.

And with basically only these thoughts to occupy him, the remaining days until the summer camp finally rolled around felt like they took so long but also at the same time felt as though they flew by far too fast, delivering him to the moment where he'd found himself standing outside the door of the U.A. boss about to board.

And he felt so much dread for some reason as he did, even knowing his friends cared. This was the first time he was going to see them again since his breakdown, and he didn't know what to expect….

Except that anything with Tooru was going to be so awkward. He gulped and finally stopped holding the bus up pretending to fix his bag, climbing on and finding himself surprised immediately upon seeing Bakugou didn't seem to be present at all.

He shook that off and looked around, everyone else was here and… his eyes briefly went over Tooru and he instantly felt like he wanted to turn Far Lance on his own chest and run it through.

Who knew just seeing her clothes and knowing she was there would be enough to make him feel so dead inside… Trying not to dwell on it he did his best to respect her wishes.

She was sitting near the front so he'd go right to the back. As he passed he saw Todoroki was occupied with Aizawa (who seemed to be unable to meet Izuku's eye) and others were all trying to give him smiles but many seemed concerned or forced.

There was tension there, and he couldn't blame them. His eyes drifted over to Ochaco who gave him a sad apologetic smile. She was sat beside Asui who seemed to have made plans to sit with Ochaco ahead of time so he wouldn't be able to sit with her.

And Iida was too busy being class rep. He just let out a very quiet inaudible sigh as he reached the back and collapsed into his seat, hoping the ride wouldn't be too long or too awkward.

And then Kyoka sat down beside him and he had to swallow a lump as he felt a plethora of confusing emotions. Why was she with him? Shouldn't she be with Tooru?

"Kyo?"

"Hey dude." She hummed softly, leaning back and giving him a soft smile. He tried to ignore the ache in his heart. She was a good consistent source of support but facing her right now was hard… and she wouldn't even know why because he wasn't supposed to know… "Thought you would like a friend."

"W-What about Tooru?" He blurted out quietly before he could stop himself, a fear gripping him that he'd somehow accidentally fuck up Kyoka and Tooru's new relationship. No matter how confused it left him feeling he couldn't be the one to ruin it, he just couldn't! "Wouldn't she rather you sit with her?"

Kyoka paused for a moment, before frowning and sighing. "We agreed I'd sit with you and make sure you're okay. Just because she, y'know, needs time doesn't mean she wants you to suffer."

He nodded, he knew that… but sometimes it felt like it was going to happen because of that. "R-Right. But… do you?"

"Want to sit with one of my best friends? Yeah I do." She deadpanned at him, making him blush slightly and shrug.

"I j-just meant… I wouldn't blame you if you would prefer not interacting with me…"

"Tough nuts, I want to." She said simply, with a finale tone as she patted his leg. "I'll leave you alone if you really need it, but do you want me to? Honestly?"

…He felt so selfish as he shook his head no.

"Then I'm staying. Look, if you don't want to talk yet, that's fine." She assured, leaning slightly closer to him. "Take things at your own pace. I'll be here for you. Just know you got a friend sitting with you, chilling with you and ready to talk or whatever you need. Listen to music, hell it's probably gonna be a long ride… Do you want to sleep?"

"H-Huh? But wouldn't that be… rude?" He asked, confused. She chuckled quietly and shook her head.

"I know you're an anxious dude and I know you're probably feeling it now." She said simply. "And I know sometimes, the best thing you can do is just… sleep. Fast forward a bit, let your brain find something else while you're unconscious. I'll keep an eye on you, keep you safe."

He looked down. "…..You're way more than I deserve in a friend."

"Oh, I think I'm exactly what you deserve. It's just a question of how much you need me." She chuckled, patting his shoulder.

"….More than you could possibly know." He muttered very quietly, not really concerned if she heard or not as he leaned back and sighed slightly, before closing his eyes and leaning against the window. "Sleep sounds good…."

"Then I'll be here for you when you wake up." She promised quietly and he nodded, taking a deep breath and just focusing on sleep. The mercy of sleep.

Heh, speaking of mercy maybe the Outsider would finally show him some and actually visit-

Almost as if on cue, he felt a cold wind rush against his face and hard floor beneath him. Despite himself, a small smile came on. 'About dang time.'

"IZUKU!" A familiar voice shouted and just as Izuku was pushing himself up he found himself enveloped in a tight hug which he returned in surprise, finding it was Nana holding him so tight. "Oh thank god… I wanted to try to comfort you so much! I'm so sorry we never got to talk sooner. We should have-"

"H-Hey, hey, it's okay. I'm fine-"

"It's not okay!" She shouted, clearly more than a little upset as her grip tightened. "I was so worried when the exam happened! I'm going to kill those U.A. buffoons if I ever go back to the living world!"

"I-"

"I need to speak with him now." The cold, ethereal, familiar voice of the Outsider spoke up and Izuku looked past to see him waiting on them as he paced.

"Well you can keep wait-" Nana's weirdly angry response was cut off as she was suddenly whisked away in a style similar to how the Outsider whisked himself around the void, said god looking up at Izuku.

"I don't believe we need more delays at the moment." He said simply. Izuku looked around confused and saw the house with the holders on another platform far away and… were they all glaring at them?

No, not at him but just the Outsider? What had he done to get them so riled?

"I assume this about Maul? It was hard without help but I got her in the end. Was she holding you back from talking to me somehow?" Izuku wondered and the Outsider shook his head.

"No, no demon can do that. I'm sure you have noticed by now your… particular run of bad luck can't be fully natural." The god said as he teleported to the other side of the platform. Izuku frowned but nodded.

"I… was hoping I was just imagining how insane the bad luck was getting but… If it's not a demon then the Abbey maybe? I did take that bonecharm! Maybe it had a failsafe for if someone took it, even if they got rid of it later?" Izuku suggested, only to get a shake of the head.

"No bonecharm would be capable of such a feat either, not to this extent and there was no failsafe on it. The bonecharm to hide a room does only that. The one on your sword to kill non-mortals just the same, does only that, and those are the only ones you've interacted with."

"Oh… So a warlock then? An artefact more powerful than a bonecharm. But wouldn't I have noticed a warlock following me about?" He frowned, looking down. This didn't make sense at all "it's definitely magical in nature."

"Indeed it is, and it is not a warlock. I am surprised you had not already pieced it together. I would have thought you would have sensed the magic due to its familiarity. Perhaps it registers too much like your own to do so." The Outsider hummed in thought, making Izuku blink in confusion.

"Too much like my own? But what kind of magic…"

"Well, I mean the only ones who share it are me and you."

….

Izuku stopped. He was misunderstanding that, right? The Outsider just had misspoke somehow-

"I hardly tried to hide it, so I'm surprised you didn't notice it on your own. I suppose that's why. Made doing it a lot easier of course."

Izuku felt everything stop as he processed that, as his mind rebooted. Then it rebooted with a single fact.

The Outsider was the one who had been ruining his life?!