In May Nikki bounced into her mom's house for a Thursday dinner replacing their usual sunday one, Evelyn who had retired recently was going away with some friends that weekend and wanted to see everyone before she left.

"You're happy today sweetheart," Evelyn said.

"I met with Catherine today," Nikki said, 'she finished my first year teacher evaluation."

"How did it go," Evelyn asked.

"Really really well," Nikki beamed, "a couple minor things to work on. But the woman who I've been covering for this year while she was on a medical leave isn't returning."

"What does that mean," Evelyn asked.

"Catherine offered me the continuing position," Nikki replied, "I have a permanent full time teaching job at Blue Pine teaching sixth grade math."

"It's yours for next year," Evelyn clarified.

"No mom it's continuing," Nikki replied, "it's mine until I choose to leave it. I have to wait to hear from the HR people at the school board office but it's my job. Once I sign the papers I own the job and it's mine now."

"Your own classroom for ever," Evelyn said.

"My own classroom," Nikki smiled.

"Congratulations," Evelyn said, hugging Nikki, "have you told your brother?"

"I only found out as I left school I came straight here to tell you," Nikki replied, "I'll tell them when they get here."

"What are you telling us," Teddy asked as they let themselves in.

"I got an offer of a continuing position today," Nikki beamed, "staying in sixth grade math at Blue Pine."

"Like an attending," Owen asked.

"I own the job and they can't take it from me until I choose to leave Blue Pine," Nikki said, "it's mine."

"An attending math teacher," Owen said, "after a year congratulations Squirt."

"Continuing contract," Nikki replied, "stop comparing education to surgery. But I could have the girls for Middle School. Medowridge feeds into Blue Pine."

"Can you be my teacher," Allison asked.

"No I can't, we're not allowed to teach family," Nikki said, "it wouldn't be right."

"Its just like how Dad and I can't prescribe you medicine when you get sick we have to take you to another doctor," Teddy explained, "Nikki your full permanent job congratulations."

"I need the papers from HR," Nikki said, "but Catherine offered it today."

"You have your job," Owen said, "what's next?"

"Potentially looking for my own place," Nikki said, "maybe it's time to outgrow your basement."

"You can't move," Allison said.

"I will one day," Nikki said.

"You're welcome to keep renting it as long as you want," Teddy said.

"I want to look at an apartment or house," Nikki said, "I have the settlement that we've put away for that and with a continuing contract I could start looking."

"Jeff," Owen said, "anything you buy now and he moves into he may have rights to if you break up."

"We're talking forever," Nikki said, "he's mentioned marriage before."

"When," Teddy asked.

"A few months ago," Nikki said, "we've both been so busy lately we've hardly been home at the same time. He's working late a lot."

"I've noticed that he's coming home later," Owen said, "are you okay with that?"

"Yes and no," Nikki said, "it lets me get my prep and marking done in peace. I'm only going to get busier in the fall."

"Busier in the fall," Teddy asked.

"I got into my masters program," Nikki said, "educational leadership in mathematics education."

"Where," Teddy asked.

"UW again," Nikki replied, "I'll branch out when it's time for a Phd."

"Dr McRae," Owen said, "go for it."

"Masters first it's a couple years of course work and my capstone project," Nikki said.

"When did you find out," Evelyn asked.

"Today," Nikki said.

"When did you apply," Teddy asked, "you never said anything."

"January," Nikki answered, "it's hard to tell you guys these things sometimes. I'm always compared to you guys. My getting my MEd is no where near on the same level as medical school. I'm just a middle school teacher. I'm always going to be younger and dumber."

"Younger we can't argue with," Owen said, "you and I just think differently. Neither of us is smarter, we think differently and are good at different things."

"Surgeon, teacher," Nikki pointed, "it might not matter at home and with our family but I hear the comments out. Her siblings are all surgeons and she's only a teacher. People saying that I should be a doctor two, that I'm wasting my life teaching."

"Let's go," Owen said, walking to the back door.

"What," Nikki asked.

"Treehouse," Owen said.

Nikki slipped her flats back on and followed Owen to the tree house.

"We haven't sat here in a while," Owen said.

"I was in college," Nikki said.

"You were," Owen said, "some fight with Jeff."

"Couple fight," Nikki said, "we argue. We're not you and Teddy that get along all the time."

"We argue," Owen said, "we get furious with each other. But I would never ever talk to her the way he talks to you. We have our fights but never in front of people. Teddy and I disagree all the time. Why isn't Jeff here tonight celebrating?"

"He's in LA this week for work," Nikki replied, "I dropped him off at the airport on Sunday afternoon and pick him up Saturday when I drop mom off."

"Did you text," Owen asked.

"I'm waiting for him to call," Nikki replied, "it doesn't matter. I'm just a dumb teacher. It doesn't compare to what you do or he does. I took the easy way out. I know that."

"Nikki you don't think that," Owen said.

"I let everyone down," Nikki said, "I'm not as smart as you. I'll never measure up. I've spent my whole life being compared and falling short. No one sees me as equal."

"What do you think," Owen asked.

"I don't know," Nikki said, "I'm good at some things but I could never do what you do. Teachers like me are common."

"And there's no way I could be in a room of 30 middle schoolers," Owen said, "birthday parties and playdates are enough for me."

"I do all the games at your girls birthday parties," Nikki retorted.

"And we love that you do," Owen said.

"Easy to have your dumb little sister do it," Nikki shrugged.

"Nikki you have a 4.0 GPA in an honours math degree and your teachers degree. You didn't even teach for a year and got accepted into a masters program," Owen said, "look at the facts."

"Surgeon, math teacher," Nikki said again.

"It's not about that squirt," Owen said, "those old biddies at church know nothing. They don't know you. They don't see your work ethic or the way people naturally fall in love with you. Kids, dogs, people they all love you. People like you in ways they never like me. You're probably the most likable of the three of us. You put people at ease, you make people want to be with you. I don't know how you do it."

"Are you disappointed in me," Nikki asked.

"The exact opposite," Owen said, "I am so proud of you Nikki. Everything you've been through and to stay as positive as you are. You've been through hell. And don't make comparisons you can't we've both been through stuff we wouldn't wish on anyone. You used all that and you got stronger. Nikki I'm really proud of you. I know mom and Teddy are as well. We all see it, you're the only one who doesn't."

"Really," Nikki asked.

"Really," Owen promised, "come on let's go celebrate you getting into your masters and getting your continuing contract. It's a good day."

"Would she be disappointed in me," Nikki asked, "I don't want to let her down."

"Meghan saw how brilliant you are before anyone else," Owen said, "she always said you would do amazing things. She was right. I watch you and see what your doing you are going to be amazing. Nikki you will do great things."

"How do you know," Nikki asked.

"Because you're you," Owen said, "I've seen you with the girls, if you're half the teacher you are with them you will change the world."

Nikki nodded.

"I'm proud of you Squirt," Owen said, "now let's go celebrate."

"Thanks Owl," Nikki said, giving him a hug.

Getting home that night Nikki grabbed her lap top and sat on her bed writing an email.

Dear Meg,

I know I've been terrible about writing again. I'm so sorry I've been really busy. I don't have any good photos to attach today. I do have really good news, well two pieces of good news. The first I got my continuing contract at Blue Pine Middle School teaching sixth grade math. I love teaching at Blue Pine and was surprised when my principal offered it to me today. I accepted on the spot. The other piece of good news today is that I got accepted to the masters in educational leadership and curriculum specialist program at UW as a math specialist. I know no one likes their math teacher, but I'm going to change that. We celebrated tonight at mom's with everyone but Nate he was working but I texted him and he's excited. I had a really good talk with Owen today in the treehouse, I'm sure we looked a bit silly but it's the tree house. Next weekend I'm helping Owen and Nate reinforce the treehouse and add new swings for Owen's kids to play on, I've done all the calculations for it. They just leave the math to me now. It's wired with mom being retired, she goes out of town with some of the ladies from church. Mom has so much free time and she's not sure what to do with it. She's looking at volunteering with a group that helps teenage moms get organized and though high school, I'm not sure how different it was from what she was doing with public health. Owen is good, he's relaxed right now and happy, he hasn't looked like a bird of prey in a while. Teddy is great, she's got some research project going on with stem cells that is over my head but she's really excited about it. Allison is almost done Kindergarten and loves school, she looks so much like Teddy except with red hair. Amber is in preschool and enjoying it most days, she's all Owen down to the Owl face.

I'm not sure what's going on with my boyfriend and can't go to Teddy with this because she hates Jeff, so does Owen. I'm not sure his LA trip for work is actually for work. I think he might be cheating on me but when I ask him he denies it. I don't know. He's been coming home later and later often after I've gone to bed. He didn't want me to apply to my masters but I have to do my masters. I'll get my Phd when it's time. I'll do it all Meg, three doctors in one family, I just can't fix people.

I still miss you and want you to come home. I worry I've let you down only being a teacher, Owen says otherwise but he's not you. I hope where ever you are you're safe and loved. Know that we all miss you every day. I've been teaching Owen's kids your silly songs, even the Blue Bird song Teddy hated so much. I hope your able to read this where ever you are and just can't reply.

Hugs and kisses,

Nikki