Hello. I'm back after a very long break. I just want to say that I appreciate everybody who is still reading this story that I never got a chance to continue. I love it and am starting to work on it again. Please comment and let me know how you are doing and what you are thinking. I am going to look forward to reading your comments.

There is no clear demarcation line between then and now, because then turns into now when you become aware of the difference between the two, and each moment is simultaneously now and then... It's all on the continuum. Time flows from being a father to actually being called one. But it happens only once...

Are you familiar with that intangible, feather-light feeling of sunlight touching the skin and caressing it, making you smile even without realizing it just because the warmth is so tender and carefree? As it escapes, it lingers and then melts into your being. That feeling is smooth and sweet and ordinary, yet extraordinary and one of a kind.

Hearing his child finally call him 'Appa' warmed and caressed Choi Young's senses the same way. When the sound of his boyish voice reached the man, he reacted by bursting into a grin as wide as the sky and as bright as the sun, and his eyes glistened with the swelling of his joyous heart, still not fully believing that it has finally arrived – his place in the child's life, claimed and acknowledged.

Only it was so momentary and illusory: Choi Young tried to hold onto the sound, but it escaped swiftly, gone into ether... He will hear it over and over again; and every time it will be a surprise filled with delight and a little sadness of lost time. And as the name 'Appa' becomes as comfortable to his ears as his own given name, the sound would loose its strength and power over him. For now, he was taken by it and held in the grasp of a child's hand at will just to hear that sound over and over, insatiable in his enchantment.

. . .

"Appa," the boy's almond eyes were shy and hopeful. "Is it true? You are my father?"

Choi Young nodded. "It is true."

"Mom said that you looked for us for a very long time."

"I did look for you for a very long time. I am so glad I was able to find you." Choi Young was not ashamed of his tears. For once he was emotional without hesitation in front of his son. He held himself back so many times, keeping his affection in check, keeping the enormity of his love condensed to a glance, a hug, he never allowed himself to say the words... "I love you, my son."

The boy fell into his embrace and began sobbing. "I am glad it is you," he whispered through the sobs into his father's ear, "I wished it was you..."

"Will you stay with me?" Little voice asked, no longer hurtful "ajjashi" added to his request.

"Of course, Young-ah," and the father settled next to him on the bed.

"Tell me a story."

"Which one?"

"How you found me."

"It is a long story."

"Please, Daddy."

Who could deny that? And Choi Young began a story of his travels yet again for the n-th night in a row, having memorized the fairytale version of his tumultuous journey he created just for the little one.

"And then you saw Mom?"

"Right. And then I saw Mom and she was as beautiful and kind as I remembered her and I felt safe and at home."

"And she held your hand and made you feel better..." the boy mumbled, his eyes closing under the heavy eyelids, a yawn escaped him.

"And she held my hand and made me feel better, " spoke softly Choi Young, his voice lulling the child to sleep.

He sat motionless, watching his son breathe the rhythmic and calm breath of sleep. His chest peacefully rising and then falling, his face completely relaxed. It was hypnotic to the point of time dissolving into nothingness, shadows and light merging into encompassing peace and the restful energy making the room an oasis from worries.

Choi Young loved these little rituals he started to develop with his son. The rituals of greeting him in the morning and setting up the table for meals, the ritual of doing exercise together and going on walks, the ritual of putting him to bed and holding his hand, while telling a story the child came to love so much. All these small tokens of parental routine he never got to indulge himself in. After all the missed time, it was hard to accept the mundane of his fatherhood.

He stood up and gave the parting tender look over the child's sleeping body. Little Young's eyes were still shut, nevertheless aware of his father's presence moving away, he uttered imperceptivity, "Appa, promise you will never leave me."

"I promise," the warrior whispered and kissed the boy's forehead.

This is one promise parents give without truly being able to keep. Yet, over and over again, in all timelines and all the universes, Choi Young would give his child that promise because he believed in it so strongly it had to come true.

A few weeks have passed since Eun Soo told Young who his father was. Being a father was one part of his identity as a man that the warrior was still learning about. Eun Soo encouraged him and Young was so welcoming and non judging... However, it felt like he simply fell from sky into the boy's life, crashing and destroying what had made sense to the child all along before he suddenly appeared. And what he knew was uncle Min Ho who was there for him to tell stories, go on walks and comfort him when he was upset.

Could he simply step into the void he left behind for another man to fill in his absence? He never got to see his son take a first step, learn to talk, or sit by his bed when he got sick for the first time. All those firsts were gone forever and he was late. Not too late luckily, but late enough for the seeds of doubt and regret to take hold despite his sincere attempts to forgive himself for not being their earlier. No matter how hard Choi Young tried to get rid of these thoughts, they kept returning and had to be dealt with it.

" I am really happy for you," said Min Ho.

Choi Young searched his eyes for some sign of deception, of actual disapproval and resentment. There was none. "Thank you."

"I know how much it means to you."

He simply nodded. It meant everything to him. " I want you to know that you will always have a place in Young's life. As his uncle. He still misses you and we should plan for ..."

The actor interrupted, "we don't need to talk about it now. I appreciate the gesture. You need time to bond and become a real family. I can wait, and so can he. I thought about this moment many times and I could never find a place for myself in this equation. I told you before and I was being honest, I need to build a life for myself. I wish to have someone to love and someone to love me. I want to have a child of my own and to finally have a family that is mine. It is a perfect time for all of us to start living our lives."

Choi Young nodded again. He could not have said it better himself and was relieved that his friend was so understanding.

"On this note," continued Lee Min Ho, "you have done wonders when you worked with me on the movie set. Working under the constraints of agency contracts obviously does not suit you. If you are ever interested in having your own business, I still have a few connections and I'm sure there will be plenty of private clients who would love to be tutored by you."

"Thank you," Choi Young smiled graciously. "I guess now I can start giving a thought about a job. It feels like it was a lifetime ago."

"It was indeed."