Chapter 45
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"Just say calm Retsy… Just stay calm. They probably won't have seen it."
"You said all of their followers," she grumbled, slumping back onto the corner of the (thankfully) empty lift..
Haida glanced away, biting the front of his lip while flexing the index finger on both of his paws together. "Well, I don't think I said that they're one and the same with our work colleagues…"
The red panda groaned. "Urghhhh, this isn't helping. You know that?"
"Huh?"
"You," she said, looking up. "You have a crazy emotional OTT reaction, then after calming down try and downplay the same thing."
"I do no…" he began, before pausing, thinking back. Images of multiple punched walls, threats to punch mammals, sudden whisky binge sessions, times getting caught out in the rain and getting pneumonia, getting scared at Fenneko's detective ability, more punching walls, waking up to find himself kissing Nick Wilde, waking up to find his paw running through Nick Wilde's tail, walking into a bathroom and getting shocked by Judy Hopps being naked in the shower, being driven into the pits of despair after accidentally breaking Skye's leg, basically kitnapping a tech genius, having a slight mental crisis on realising that his attraction to Retsuko might be a misfiring hunting instinct, being landed with a barrage of complaints and requests for answers in writing from Anai, finding out his sister had sold his likeness to a toy company, finding out he was 'the jerk' in his family for not being 'okay' with that and meeting with Retsuko's mother flashed through his mind.
"-Okay, maybe I do. But it really isn't that big of a deal."
She looked down and grumbled.
"-And I mean, you do the same thing. Just you hide it inside you in public, then let it out later."
She turned, leant into the corner, and grumbled some more. Haida sighed and got down on his knees, leaning down to hug her. She shooed off the first touch, but was indifferent to the second, and leant into the third. "This is all my fault," she muttered. "I coulda just ignored that tax issue, and we'd still be living ordinary lives."
He nodded. "Yeah. Talking here and there about that mystery fox the DA threw in jail."
There was a pause for a second, before she turned around. "Washimi said we'd face moments like this if we wanted to become PI's. When we'd be faced with intense moments that would test us, and that we should be prepared for them."
"Uh-hu," he nodded.
"I wasn't expecting that intense moment to be this."
"I mean, I suppose it's better than being shot at, right?"
Her eyes narrowed. "Not helpful," she grumbled, before shaking her head. "-I know I'm supposed to fight this. I know that in the stories the hero gets beaten down, they fight back, and they win. But part of me always gets tired first. Ever since I was young, even the teachers would say, 'she's a good girl. But I can't help but see some passivity.' And they say it as if it's a fault, and I suppose it is, but why does it have to be? Why can't it be a good thing to just have a nice comfy place in life that you're happy to settle in, and relax there. Why?"
"Yeah, that sounds nice," Haida agreed, "but was your place ever comfy?"
Her eyes widened.
"Because you know what I think? It wasn't. And yeah, maybe it isn't a bad thing to not want to fight, and it is a good thing to find your comfy place and be able to put down the ladder and stay there. But maybe they were saying you needed to be able to fight to get to your comfy place?"
She nodded, smiling a bit, before walking out and hugging her hyena. "It's just I'm tired of getting these attacks. I know I should fight them, but I'm just scared. I want to find a hole and stay there until it goes away."
"Well, it's not going to," he said. "And maybe they'd find you even if you were in that hole. But you know what will keep them away and make you feel good. Fighting back against them, and beating them!"
"Yeah," she said softly, before stepping away, her gaze hardening. "Yeah!"
"Yeah!" he cheered. "We're gonna fight them." He glanced up at the floor counter, they were almost there. "When that door opens, we're going to meet a crowd of rude and misinformed coworkers. And we're going to correct them right away. Together. You with me?"
"Yeah!"
They both nodded at each other, as the lift dinged. "Then let's do this!"
They walked out together onto the landing, paw in paw and…
…
-"Where… is everyone?" she asked, looking around.
"Uhhh," he began, not quite sure himself.
"-Morning," came a call from their side, and they turned to see Ookami walking up. They turned, gave each other a nod and steeled themselves…
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…
"Are you expecting anything?" he asked, his head tilting to the side a little.
They looked at each other, Haida speaking first. "No…"
"-I mean, what would we be?" Retsuko chuckled.
The maned wolf hung back a second, before rolling his eyes. "Good point. Well, nice to see you."
And with that, off he walked.
The pair looked at each other.
"I guess he doesn't know," she said, relaxing.
"Yeah, that's…"
"-Hold on you two."
They both froze, turning to look at him, leaning against the side of the corridor in a relaxed posture.
"I just wanted to say, thank you so much for setting me up with Daz-senpai."
The two blinked. "Oh, that," the red panda said, relaxing and letting a genuine smile come on her face. "No problem!"
"Yeah, glad you've found someone," Haida agreed.
The maned wolf smiled, its warmth more than counteracting the slight unnerving surprise of actually seeing his normally indecipherable lips part. "I've always preferred to keep these aspects of myself private, but… -I now think it's cool having good mammals like you I can share it with." And with that he turned and headed back to his main office, his tail wagging behind him.
"Oh crap," Retsuko muttered, face going into her paws, much to the confusion of Haida.
"Uhhh, is there something I'm missing here? As that seemed to go well."
She looked up to him. "And what happens when he finds out about…"
"Oh. Right… Oh crap."
"Yeah," she groaned, walking on. The pair turned, entered the main office, and…
Quiet.
More quiet than usual, though they guessed that might be due to Ton nursing the effects of last night in one of the private office booths. Haida looked around and shrugged. "Maybe we should just give them all the heads up, and…"
"-No," she hissed. "Then we'll look suspicious."
"I… Or maybe if we see Tsunoda, we can ask her to unshare that video."
"That…" she began, before thinking it over. "Okay, yes. Let's do that!"
He nodded, before looking around, frowning. "Uh, where's Tsunoda?"
…
"Guys? Where's Tsunoda?"
…
"Guys?"
"I don't know," came a response, and they looked over to see the large black water buffalo, Yagyu, looking their way. "She's usually in, but I haven't seen her."
"Eh, she might be out sick," Haida said, smiling. "No worries."
"-Say, where's Fenneko?" the buffalo asked.
"-Out sick. No worries."
"But she's sick…"
"And she's taking the medicine. No worries!"
He stared them down for a second or two before turning back to his work, leaving the pair to sit down, together. Retsuko sighed as she let the tension go. "Nothing bad seems to be going on, so let's not rock the boat… for now."
"You sure?" he asked.
She nodded. "Sure."
He put his paw on hers. "Okay then. Let's get through this."
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"Anything there, Ash?"
The teenage fox kit glanced up at Agnes, all while moving a thumb pad down to his phone and resting it down. Another pull down, another bounce of the news-site display as it went just a bit under before rebounding back, another circling ring within a circle appeared and then…
"No," he said, frowning as he repeated the process. Thumb pad down, thumb pad flicking up, screen spring back and loading symbol appearing before it flashed away. Nothing changed. The news that the picture wasn't of Kris hadn't been released yet. Instead, news articles talking about the killer evidence, and more and more Kurt's side, were still posted up. Agnes held herself closer to him as his eyes narrowed, her paws gripping tighter and her fingers furrowing through his fur.
An absent thought sparked through him: when they were in a relationship, she never held him this much, did she? And yet, her holding him so much here gave not an ounce of warm feeling to him. It was a nothing to a nothing compared to to the flutters he'd felt when he'd held her paw, when he'd awkwardly tried to preen her, and she preen back.
He huffed.
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"Is there anything else we could be doing?" she asked, Ash's eyes narrowing in response.
"No. Maisy's still out, I've already talked to Beavis…"
"Beavis?" she asked. "Why… I…" She blinked a few times. "You think he and the weasel did it?"
Ash took a breath in and out. "The weasel was our first suspect, and then I remember how those two had talked. I thought that maybe Beavis had been phished or something, giving the weasel what he needed to know."
Agnes looked on distastefully. "Or he'd just give it away without caring for a dollar or two. But why? Why did the weasel go after Kris? I mean… -no offense… but I thought the two would prefer to go after you."
Ash shrugged, all while giving his phone another futile scroll. "None taken, that's what happened."
"I… -huh?" Ash paused from his doom scrolling, looking up at the vixen and seeing her head tilted hard to the side. "Wait, what do you mean? I don't…"
"When the cops came in," Ash recounted, closing his eyes and trying to detach himself from that day, yet unable to stop the sounds of the screams and the fear rip through. He unknowingly rubbed one of his sweatbands, not for comfort or anything, instead just confirming that those pawcuffs were not on the wrists of the mammal they were planned to be on, biting in and cutting down hard and cold. Agnes noticed him shiver, a ripple of raised fur racing around his body, but was cut off before asking why. "They were told that the howlers were in a fox's locker. But it wasn't Kris'. That's why they had the stuff with the list and everything."
Agnes looked on with a face of stone for a second before her right ear flicked backwards and the shock of her realisation echoed through her body. "Oh Ash…"
"It's okay."
"No," she sniffed.
"I've come to terms with it," he said, focussing back down on his phone. Thumb pad down, flick up, screen bounce, timer ring appears and goes, nothing changes.
He was broken off as she grabbed his paw and began to sniff. "I'm sorry Ash, I'm so… I'm so…"
He glanced around for a second before deciding that, on account of his difficulty with her yesterday, he'd just wait, pat her on the back and say 'there-there'.
"There there…" he said softly, rubbing a paw down her spine as sniffed and tried to speak. "There there…"
Eventually, after sobbing and stumbling, she took in a large breath and managed to start getting it out. "I'm just…. I'm… sniff I'm a… sniff horrible friend to you, Ash…"
Thinking for a second, he mumbled something back that should help her. "You're getting better."
"I… sniff-sniff… That night I hoped it was… I wished it was… I remember I wished it… it was you, Ash… It was you that was taken! Not him! And… sniff..."
Ash looked away, a little flick of anger going through him at that news.
"-It was just for a moment… Just… Just when I was angry, and I didn't mean it but…" She sniffed again. "I'm sorry. I didn't know it… it was meant for you… And I'd still… I'd still fight for you… I'd… I'd…"
"Says the vixen planning to throw Kris away," Ash grumbled, only to be shaken as she wailed again.
"Oh god, you're right… I'm...sniff… such a worthless, useless, piece… piece of cuss, I…"
Okay, that had been a bit mean. No, more of that… Ash closed his eyes. He'd hurt her when she needed help, and what he wanted to do with his life was make people better. And if that meant putting up with things like that, then he could do it. "But once Kris would convince you otherwise, you'd still fight, right?"
Taking in a long sniff and trying to stay her sobs, Agnes glanced away. "I… I guess… I…" She stayed silent, stepping away and walking over to a corner. "It's not the first time."
Ash turned and, after a moment's thought, walked up to hold her paw. "It's okay." She yanked it away.
"I… I treated you bad too, back… before I dumped you, I…"
She breathed in and out, while Ash felt his body stiffen. He remembered the pain and anger and… Biting his lip, he cut in. "Did you ever love me?"
…
She sniffed. "I don't know, I…"
He held her paw, gripping it tighter to stop her snatching it away. "Just go slowly, it'll be okay," he reassured her, even as he himself didn't feel that way. He had loved her, he thought she'd loved her back and now… a maybe? He didn't know what to think.
"I remember when I was young," she said, with a little sniff. "And there were all these… All these movies and stuff, and they were talking… talking about all us girls… we'd… we'd have highschool sweethearts and…" She breathed out, then in. "But I then learnt… well… you know… Lots of species… Lucky if you get one of your own, lucky if you're inter which I'm not, but… But then I met you, and…" She closed her eyes. "You… You were a good friend," she said, managing to look at him, before shying away. "But I don't think I… I didn't love you, but I wanted this, so I… So I pushed myself hoping that, it… you know, we'd learn and…"
"Did you?" he asked.
She let out a pained sob. "I don't know…"
Ash sighed, looking away. In a way, he now kind of knew what it was like, not knowing his feelings right now himself.
She kept glancing away. "And I… I knew when Kris came… I then knew what it was like… to… to have a crush, to feel and… it was all I wanted and…" She bit her lip. "I'm… I'm sorry Ash. We… We could have been good friends, but… But I wasn't. I wasn't a good friend… I'm not a good friend to anyone. I'm sorry. I'm sniff so, so sorry."
…
"Come on," Ash said, holding her paw and rubbing it. "Come on, it's okay…"
She looked up, unsure.
Ash looked into her eyes, before flicking down. "It does hurt, in a way. But I've done dumb stuff in my life too. We need each other right now, don't we. So let's forget all this dumb stuff we did, okay. Maybe we were never meant to be lovers, but let's be good friends."
She blinked, wiping away her tears, as a glint of hope appeared in her eyes "R-r-really?"
He smiled. "Yeah, really," he said, as that glint felt like a ray of warmth on him. He'd helped her again, and he was right. This… This was what he was meant to do, and it felt good.
She leant forward and hugged him, as he hugged back, his tail wagging hard.
Finally, they broke off, on odd awkwardness between them. There was a pause, neither sure what to do, before Ash brought up his phone again. Thumb pad down, scroll down, screen bouncing and loading animation playing.
"No, nothing yet," he sighed.
Agnes sadly nodded. "Come on, we might as well start going to our next lesson."
Looking on, Ash noticed that they had ten minutes left, so didn't really think so. Then again, what else was there to do. Doom scroll here or doom scroll there, it didn't make much difference, so, without a plan, off they went.
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Only to find something to do on the way there, not that it was something that either would want, not by a long way.
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"Say what you just said to my face!"
They both ducked behind a corner, peeking out to watch with worried looks. There, before them, stood an older fox they knew very well. Brittany, her fur raised and an angry scowl on her muzzle, staring down a mix of younger mammals, some smaller, some larger.
The largest, an addax who could pummel her if she wanted, simply crossed her arms and stared the vixen down. "Just sayin'," the screwhorn antelope began, wiggling about sassily, "that the fox you were lookin' after really did do it." Smirking, she gave a derisive snort through her large nostrils, Brittany flinching slightly from the flecks of mucus scattered into her. The other students began laughing and giggling, especially as the addax continued. "There, said it right to your…" She dove in, right to within a whiskers length of Brittany. "-FACE!"
The vixen flinched back, stopping herself before her first back-paw fully hit the ground, not that it stopped the assembled mammals from giggling. For a second, the vixen's teeth bared, before she swallowed it down and spoke out, her eyes narrowed and muzzle riven with harsh folds. "I don't need bunny ears to know that's not what you said!"
"Who cares?" asked a sea otter. "What we said wasn't wrong."
Brittany crossed her arms, leaning down to look him in the eyes. "Then say it."
He opened his paws out. "Of course the fox did it, whatcha expect."
The vixen's tail bristled. "Just like I thought."
"Not that anyone gives a cuss," cut in a new mammal. A ring-tail cat, it's appearance and genetics far closer to a raccoon than any feline.
"I do."
"Why? Cuz you can't stand that fox getting caught out?"
"-Because I can't stand your stinkin' fox hating," she snapped back, her teeth baring. "And let me tell you, you picked the wrong fox to slur. I'm going to drag it to the top, I know mammals in high places, and they are going to come down on you hard."
"Hah, wig-girl," the addax laughed, making a playful attempt to yank on Brittany's blonde head-hair. "It's your words against all of ours."
Brittany looked on, paws quickly gathering her hair behind her ears while her bottle-brushed tail swayed and flicked.
"It's your word against our word," came a new voice, Brittany glancing behind to see Ash marching out, an at first unsure Agnes quickly following. The young todd rooted himself squarely in front of Brittany, legs straight and paws on hips. Agnes meanwhile halted level with the older vixen, who glanced down for a second.
Agnes looked up before giving a slightly unsure wave. "Hi… -I guess."
There was a snort of laughter from the ringtail. "Really… All the best friends of the crooked fox, joining in a skulk together to defend him."
"Gah!" Brittany snapped. "You fox hating little…"
"-Skulk is the correct word," he cut in again, "deal with it, snowflake."
Ash, at first standing hard like a bastion, broke his stoic visage to glance back at Brittany. "He does have us there…"
"Grrrrrr… -You still called Kris crooked…"
"He is, bitch" the addax yelled, "a crooked fox who wanted to howler us. There's no denying it, they have a picture now!"
"I'm a vixen, you cow!" Brittany shouted back.
"And you ain't got a leg to stand on here…"
"I…" Brittany began, before trailing off. Thankfully, another fox took up the baton.
"You know, I have friends in the ZPD, and they already know it's fake," Ash cut in, not noticing Brittany shake with a feeling of pure relief and mouth out 'thank-you'.
"You're a fake," the ringtail jeered, shooting two finger guns at the young tod, all to the applause of his friends.
Ash breathed in and out. "And when this news comes out?"
"Which it's not gonna," the slim protocid sassed back. "Cuz your news is fake. And if it does come out, we all know it's fake now! Just like the stuff we were saying wasn't anything bad."
"Yeah," the sea otter said. "We said it's typical for this kinda mischief to be done by a fox… As that's what the statistics say. It's science."
Ash's eyes narrowed. "I'm very sceptical of that."
"Don't engage him," Brittany warned. "He's just a troll."
"And you're just a coward," the ringtail accused. "As you know you'll lose against our facts and logic!"
"Yeah," the addax cut in. "Like those dumb protestors who think your howler fox shouldn't get what he deserves, huh? Most of them went away pretty quickly, didn't they?"
The otter cut in. "As now they have to accept that foxes can do those things. And you've got to accept we're the good guys here for telling the truth."
"Yeah!" the ringtail added in, as the addax stuck her tongue out at Brittany, the crowd cheering.
Brittany closed her eyes and breathed out. "You think you've won this battle," she said, "well, we're gonna win this war."
"Yeah, I'd like to see you try," the addax sassed.
Brittany stood her ground against the much larger, horned bovid. Ash, between them did too, as Agnes began tensioning her legs, feeling the static in the air and readying to leap away when the lightning hit.
It was all cut off though as a new mammal, a boar, cut in. "Chill guys! Chill," he said, getting between them. "Let's all calm down."
Brittany and the other foxes were thankful for the intermission, though as Ash stepped back, his ear ticked up. Something didn't seem quite right.
There was an odd quiet from the larger group too as the boar got out a small guitar he had over his shoulder. "Come on, let's all calm down, shall we? Here, I'll play a song we can all enjoy together, I hear it's a classic."
The foxes looked at each other, not quite sure what to make of it, not that the boar was stopping. Guitar out, he began singing, taking on a silly accent as he did so.
"In my country there is problem,
And that problem is transport.
It take very, very long,
Because Kazyakstan is big."
Ash's ears flicked again and, looking up, he realised that when he'd got there he thought he'd seen a boar at the back of the herd. A boar that was not there now.
"Throw transport down the well,
So my country can be free."
There was a cheer behind as the rest of the herd joined in. "So my country can be free!" Looking behind, Ash saw the same looks on both vixen's faces. They knew something was up.
"We must make travel easy,
Then we have a big party!"
And then the boar at play looked them straight in the eyes, and gave a look that seemed to have been stolen right off of Beavis' face.
"In my country there is problem,
And that problem is the fox!"
There was a burst of giggles from the crowd behind, as Brittany's eyes went as wide as saucers.
"They scam everybody money,
And even fur from your back."
And then the chorus began, the whole crowd behind bursting into laughter and giggled.
"Throw the fox down the well!
So my country can be free!"
'-So my country can be free!'
"You must muzzle his sharp teeth,
Then we have a big party!"
There was a round of side-splitting laughter as Brittany, slap-faced from the whole thing, snapped back into action, grabbing Ash and Agnes' paws and turning tail, leading them on. "Come on," she said, her voice strained.
Ash, looking up, held back. In that moment, searching for something to say, he remembered a piece of advice from a trusted mentor. He held firmer. "Never let them see that they get to you." She glanced down and her quivering lip firmed as she managed a slight nod.
They left together, ignoring the round of cheers from the crowd, and the boar still at play.
"If you see the fox comin',
You better lock up your bunnies,
You must grab his devil's fur,
And I tell you what to do!
"Everybody," someone called, and the sound of their laughter filled singing managed to chase down the foxes even as they left the building.
"Throw the fox down the well!
So my country can be free!"
'-So my country can be free!'
"You must cut his silver tongue,"
'-You must cut his silver tongue!'
"Then we have a big party!"
'-Then we have a big party!'
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They stopped in a small alcove between two buildings, the kind of dead space that was usually filled by mammals up to no good. Instead, here, three mammals sat, just…
"-Gah!"
The sound of claws raking down the brick surface sounded out as the eldest member of the small skulk stretched against it in frustration. Her fur was raised, and her lips wobbled just a bit, flicking in and out as she tried to bite or chew them. A deep breath in, a deep breath out, and she closed her eyes and looked down. "You two okay?"
There was a long pause, the two younger members looking back, the todd's hand paw holding the vixen's. He looked at her and, finally, through misty red eyes, she said yes.
The other two relaxed, Brittany stepping out and giving a scan and sniff around, just to be sure. Paws wiping down her front, she relaxed. "Urghhh… Those cussheads don't seem to have followed us. Thank god."
Ash nodded. "They had their fun.
"-Speciesist pricks," Brittany snipped before sitting down, grabbing the back of her dress and pulling it up to keep the hem clean as she did so. She looked down at the bricks for a second or two, before glancing up as a paw held onto her shoulder.
"You okay?" Ash asked.
She rolled her eyes and stood up again. "Hey, no need to worry about that. I'm the one who should be asking that. Speaking of, you okay?"
Ash was silent for a second. "We already said yes."
The older vixen rolled her eyes. "Agnes did. What about you?"
He looked down and breathed in and out. "Am now… kind of… I've been through worse, not that it makes it okay."
Brittany's eyes narrowed. "Cuss no, those…" She breathed in and out. "I… I mean it was waaaaay worse during the Howler crisis, but…"
"It wasn't so bad then," Agnes said, quietly interrupting her. Put on the spotlight, she seemed to shrink a bit, her ears going back and tail dropping between her legs, before she found her voice again. "I… I mean, some mammals would snap at all preds, and… -Well, it didn't feel personal. This… this did…"
Ash nodded. "And at least then, they kind of had a reason… often, they sounded scared, and were lashing out. You sort of understood. They weren't doing it for fun."
"'Fraid to say I still think the Howler's were worse," Brittany said. "Though that was more from the fear that my friends or family or…" she cut herself off, breathing in and out. "-You know."
…
"Were they in our year or not?" Agnes asked.
…
"I think they're two below," Ash finally said, looking up to Brittany.
She shrugged.
.
…
"That's two years we shared with them," Agnes mumbled on. "Through the howler crisis, I…"
"-Yeah," Brittany said, snapping her finger. "The otter, I remember seeing him crying after a honey badger went. Saying that mustelids could get it, and it might come to him next… -though wasn't one of the first a small river otter who'd figured it out and was iced or something, I…" She shook her head. "But I remember, as I went over to him, and held him, and…" She cut off, beginning to tremble, gathering the two younger foxes' attention.
Again, Ash stepped forward. "You okay?"
Squatting down, paws over her muzzle, she pulled them down to reveal pink misting eyes and, with a sniff, she answered. "No…"
Ash stepped up and held her paw, which she grabbed tight.
"I… I helped him… I hugged him back then! I… -Did all this make him forget that, huh? Or… Or was it seeing everyone trying to support Kris, he thought us foxes should… should 'learn our place' or…'" Eyes closed, a foot paw flexed as it dragged back, crunching the loose stones that covered the ground. "Or all of them. Where did they all come from… This… I got a few dumb slurs by… by idiots going back, but nothing really big...Not like this! This… this is new… Is this going to be what our life is going to be like going on? Are more mammals going to turn into that? Or… Or are they…" She closed her eyes and breathed in. "Have they always been out there, huh? Thinking that about us, all this time."
…
"I don't know," Ash said, looking down. "I just know that they're bullies."
Taking a breath in, wiping her tears away, she stood up. "Yeah."
"And we don't let them win."
She nodded. "Yeah."
"And yeah, it may be our word against there's, but we still fight, don't we? We still show them that we're not gonna take this."
"Yeah!" she said, standing up. She leant down and held him tight. "Thanks… it helped, just a bit."
"Just doing what I do best," Ash replied, as a warm smile grew on his muzzle. Brittany slipped out, turning back to give them a wave.
"Just keep doing what you do best then… Until we get some good news."
"Will do," he replied, as they split up. Break was coming to an end, and they were going to have to get to their lessons fast. The older vixen took a breath in and out. In truth, she may have put on a bit of a strong face for them back there, but what else was she meant to do? It had been intense, and it hurt her, deep inside, and it would be a struggle to concentrate going on. She guessed that Ash was probably the same, poor kit. Though he'd had his ups and downs, he didn't deserve this… Though, nothing compared to poor Kris. She'd woken up this morning thinking he was innocent, gone to school thinking he was guilty again, and now she wasn't sure what to think. Gah! She just wanted to do the right thing, but even doing that it wasn't enough for those mammals. Head ears and tail lowered.
Nothing would be.
And even if Kris was completely exonerated, would they ever believe it? And even if they stopped being so vocal, it didn't mean they were gone… They'd still be out there, waiting, silently… Her heart seemed to sink within her, the awful feeling trying to send tears back to her eyes before she forced them back down again. She'd never be free of this, would she? However 'better' it seemed and however other mammals 'said' they didn't care…
It…
They…
Would always be out there.
They'd always have to deal with this.
Because they were foxes, and she hated that.
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"Kii? Kii…?"
Judy looked around the inside of the locker room, jumping past a few officers heading out. Her ears scanning around, she paused, glancing around before focussing on the cheetah, busy getting things out of her locker. Shaking off some heavy eye droops, the bunny walked forward. "There you are!"
Kii stood there, hunched over and her ears flicking around, before standing up and looking down at Judy. "Yes…" she began. "Judy…"
"-Important news," she cut in. "Listen. That strange fox we mentioned who visited Kris' father? I think he might be the same mammal who posed as Kris in that picture… -a friend of mine says they ran it through 'Impalta', some facial recognition software they have, and they know it's not Kris. Bogo said he'd ask you to check it out, but you could also check out between the picture and 'Shylock'. It might give us a new lead!"
She smiled, looking up at Catano, who looked off… Irritated, even.
"Hey," the bunny began. "Is anything the…"
"Thank you for your input," she said, her voice clipped. Judy's head tilted to the side. "As a matter of fact, we do know how to do our jobs, and Oates has already headed out to request security camera footage from the apartment building. We're doing fine on our own, thank you."
Judy blinked. "Hey, did I do anything to earn that attitude?"
She turned down and looked hard at the bunny. "Presuming that Oates and I are incompetent and can't do this without you, for a start?"
"I…" she began, blinking in shock. "-Hey, I'm just trying to help," she began, as the emotion curdled into an insulted anger. "And who got you those leads, anyway?"
"I…" Catano replied, pausing and taking a breath in. "Those were deeply appreciated," she said, her emotions briefly softening as she carried on. "And I suppose those things from your friend with 'Impalta' are too. I guess that must be a talented mammal. Does she have any more of those software programs under her sleeve?"
"Not that I know of," Judy began, thinking back to the mammal who'd sent that text, all two feet, dark humour and giant ears of her. "But she does have talent," she carried on, smiling. "Trust me, she's this ace with social media, you would not believe the amazing things that she can do."
"There's a lot of things I don't believe right now."
"Oh sweet cheese, isn't that truueee…" she said, the last word morphing into a yawn. "Oh, sorry there. -But yeah, what with all the lies coming out of that hippo. Not just the ones about Kris, it's other mammals too, he just lies and attacks anyone he thinks will get in his way."
"Maybe some mammals deserve to be attacked."
Judy blinked, not sure if she'd heard that right. Scratch that, scratch her giant ears too, of course she had! But still, it was as if her friend was agreeing with that mammal... But that meant… "-Don't listen to him," she cut in, just a bit worried. "Don't let him creep into your mind," she said, holding a lecturing finger up for good measure. "He's a terrible person, and he throws everything out to try and give himself an excuse, he…" she closed her eyes, her arms pulling back as she tried to think of how to sum it up. "-He's like an abusive mammal, gaslighting. And just remember that he's doing it so he can keep on hurting an innocent fox. So he can carry on hurting foxes, and other predators too." She opened her eyes and looked up. "Predators like you Kii. You can't just go off siding with him. Remember who he is."
"I don't know," she said, the fingers on one paw drumming against the side of her leg. "I mean, I think he might have a few positives…"
"What…?" Judy exclaimed. "How can you say that? I… -What possible good thing is there to say about him?"
"Well," she began, nodding her head. "He takes a hard line against ovinophobia for a start…"
"-That's a distraction," Judy cut off, facepawing. "Don't listen to him. He's making a giant issue out of something that barely exists, I… It's obvious he's just using it to distract mammals away from how speciesist he really is against predators!" She wiped down her tired face, her paw going to her heart. "And it's working with you…" she said, not quite believing it. "I thought you were smarter than that."
"Maybe I just have a concern for sheep?"
Judy sighed. "Listen, I know there were nasty mammals who lashed out at sheep, and I know it was bad for them after Bellwether was arrested. But sheep aren't in trouble right now. There aren't mammals in high places openly having fun ruining the lives of young sheep…"
"-Except for the ones in your group."
"I…" Judy began, before closing her eyes and groaning. "Listen, a few ovinophobes turned up at the protest. Yes they're crazy, and they're nasty, but it's not like they're a real danger or anything. It's a distraction Kii! That hippo doesn't really care for sheep, other than those who are in on his side and are busy scheming with him. Like Bellwether…" Her voice hung for a second, before she remembered what Finnick had witnessed. "-or her brother. Bad sheep who are off scheming wicked things, and are the only reason why those ovinophobes are any threat at all."
Catano looked down at her, her face hardening like barbed wire. "You mean like the ovinophobe who's your amazing friend?"
Judy blinked, before scowling with a flash of anger. "Is this about Honey?"
"-Of course it's about Honey!" Catano yelled back, making her flinch. "It's all been about Honey, I… -How… -How could you possibly work with that mammal if you knew what…"
"-Know?" Judy spoke back, crossing her arms. "What do you know about her? Yes, I heard she made some nasty videos in the past. But that's in the past. She went to a mental hospital, she came out changed, and ever since we met her again she has been trying to prove that. Trying to show that she is a new mammal and has redeemed herself. And you know what, she did."
"How?" Catano said with a scowl. "How could she possibly…"
"She met with a bunch of her old followers and got beaten out for trying to convince them that they were wrong. That she'd been wrong. She's shown that she's passed it. She has more than earned her second chance, and she is my friend, and after seeing mammals like that hippo bully Kris I am not going to let others bully her either." She folded her arms and stood her ground as Catano looked on, thinking.
"No," the big cat said, shaking her head. "What she's done is still out there. The harm she's caused is still making mammals suffer, that can never be taken back. And you think that gets washed off because she spent a month in Barkham Asylum? Because the bad mammal needs her chance at 'redemption'?"
"Firstly," Judy hissed, a foot drumming on the floor as she raised a finger. "Don't play the good mammal when doing something so insensitive as that Barkham joke! Besides, you know that all our mental cases go to Bedlamb. And, as for redemption?" she asked. Her aggression receded to merely a scowl. "Yes. Redemption."
She closed her eyes.
"That's the thing I learnt from the Howler Crisis, more than anything, redemption." She breathed in and out. "Look at Nick. Look at how much his life has turned around, how much it's gone right and done good for him and others. Because even though he'd done bad in the past, he was given that shot at redemption. -And out in the burrows, another fox. Gideon Grey, who spent his childhood bullying me and a bunch of sheep… He went off, became a baker, he apologised and you know what!? He earned it too, and if it weren't for him and his redemption, I'd have never solved that case and so many predators would have suffered and… and… and I wouldn't have had my chance to apologise to Nick for what I'd said to him. And solve the case, and make amends for how I screwed up with the press conference and… and… and... get my own redemption. -And I can't just go denying mammals that same thing after seeing how it helped everyone… and how I had the chance to have my own too!"
Judy had to run a finger under her eyes to dry them and looked up, hopeful, at Catano. The cheetah looked down, coldly. "Childhood mistakes and flubbing a line by accident? Those are things that can be forgiven. Spending years making propaganda saying that a certain species was evil, raising hordes of mammals that have the same view, making innocent mammals out there suffer and hate themselves?" she said, pointing an arm out of the door. "That can't be Hopps. No way!"
"What, so we should give up on mammals?" Judy asked. "There's a reason we send mammals off to the department of corrections. Because we believe that they deserve the chance to change. And if we don't think that, if we think they're set in stone forever? Then what's the point, huh? What even is it?" Paws on her hips, she looked up at her, shaking her head. "It's as if the months she spent in a mental hospital meant nothing."
"They don't," she said. "That mammal should have spent years in prison for what she's done!"
"What! Don't be ridiculous…"
"-No, you're being the ridiculous one here," Catano cut in. She looked down, muzzle riven with angered scowls and ears back, while her eyes were wide, open and hurt. "I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt, I wanted to…" She closed her eyes and looked away. "But you know, and you don't care."
"I… Of course I care," Judy said, stomping her foot. "You're the one who doesn't care."
"Like Wassermaim doesn't care about sheep?"
"Of course he doesn't…"
"Like you don't care about sheep."
"Don't be stupid, I care about sheep, I have sheep friends and…"
"Oh yeah," she said, rolling her eyes. "Where have I heard that one before."
"What!?" Judy exclaimed. "You're comparing me to the likes of him?"
"And you aren't?"
"Of course I'm not! Listen, this is his tactics at work. He's manipulating you…"
"-Because god forbid I come to my own conclusions," Catano cut in. "Because if I have some concern for sheep, that's got to be me being manipulated, hasn't it? If I agree with him that there are mammals out there making life miserable for sheep, and it's a serious problem…"
"I'm not saying it's not," Judy began to say. "I'm saying it pales in comparison to what foxes are suffering, and he's playing it up and it's working." She looked down and breathed in and out. "There are some jerks who hate sheep, but he's making it out like this society has a giant tilt against them. No, that's what there is against mammals like foxes…"
"So you're saying that you can't be speciesist against sheep?"
"What?" the bunny asked, taken aback,
"-Because they're at the top of the pecking order and have spent their lives pecking down on predators, and are all guilty of being speciesist going down, so what goes up is what they deserve…"
"No, you can be speciesist against sheep," Judy said, her nose twitching. "What kind of idiot would say that, huh? You're just putting words in my mouth. Are you on his side or not?"
Catano's tail gave a hard swish. "I'm on my own side. I'm not on his side, I wouldn't side with antivulpites. And I wouldn't side with ovinophobes too, so I don't think I'm on your side either."
"W-what? I'm not… In what way am I…"
"The way in which you rant about him, call him scum of the earth, when he technically hasn't said anything…"
"Oh come on, it's clear if you look at him."
"Oh sure, it is 'clear'," Catano said, making finger quotes. "But while it's 'clear' with him, I'd say it's crystal with your Honey Badger friend, and in your view she's a 'wonderful mammal'…"
"They're entirely different," Judy spoke, planting her foot.
Catano scowled, pausing as her phone buzzed. A paw going down to check it, she kept her eyes on Judy. "Yes, they are," she said, in a tone that was about as agreeable as a mouthful of uncleaned kopi-luwak beans.
"Honey changed…"
"And would you forgive him if he 'changed'? Or Bellwether for that matter?"
"I…" Judy began, as Kii cut her off.
"My shift's starting, so I've got to go," she said, turning and briskly walking out.
Judy fumbled a bit, watching her zip off, before blurting out. "I'd try!"
For a moment, it looked like Kii would give an off-paw reply, but in the end she said nothing. Leaving the bunny there, slumping down and hitting her head against the metal locker door. What… The cuss… was that?
She groaned. How had he gotten Kii? Her, of all mammals, it didn't…
And how the heck did she have so much hate against Honey, it…
Her eyes narrowed. Kii didn't know Honey, and even then, if she chose not to forgive her, then that was her loss. It didn't matter, as far as the bunny was concerned the honey badger had earned her redemption. She was good now.
And, if Dawn came back to her long in the future, after trying to ruin the lives of literally every predator in Zootopia… After trying to turn her boy friend into a monster that would kill her in the worst way imaginable, while effectively killing him (and burdening him something she couldn't even begin to imagine if he did end up getting cured)...
If she came back, said she was sorry, asked for forgiveness…
Well, if she'd earned it, which Judy guessed could somehow be possible, then yes.
Yes, she would forgive her.
Even if she couldn't figure out what the ewe might be able to say.
What could she say…?
Judy blinked, her eyes widening, and she raced out of the locker room, bounded up the stairs, and almost slammed into Nick.
"Woah…" he said. "I know you were taking your time, but…"
"Is Bogo in his office?" she asked.
"I guess," he shrugged. "Why?"
"I need to ask a favour," she said.