Chapter Title: Ben and Tanner

Series Title: Unlikely Brothers

Ages in this chapter: Tanner (13) Dashen (19)

Chapter Summary: Tanner is on Tatooine again to practice his Force exercises and Ben (Obi-Wan) tries to understand the place Tanner has in his future. Chapter also includes Qui-Gon Jinn.

"I can't do it, Ben."

"You can. You will. Stay focused."

Sweat rolled down the boy's face. A study in concentration against the elements. Twin suns working against him both in brightness and heat. A test of will to move larger objects while other forces worked to oppose him.

Tannerlin Vai's hand remained stretched forward, determined to move the nearby object - Ben's battered old land speeder; it sat parked on the hot sand, idle and immovable. It remained immovable as Tanner's focus waned, the opposing elements too much for his strained efforts and limited skills.

Ben Kenobi encouraged him to continue, though he saw the boy failing and knew he would not succeed in lifting the vehicle off the ground. Nevertheless, he wanted to offer him every opportunity.

Time passed. Tanner bathed in sweat from forehead down. His breathing labored.

A voice came to be. One only audible for Kenobi's ears. A beloved voice from beyond. It chastised him for continuing the training.

Obi-Wan, enough. Let the boy rest. You know as I do he cannot complete the task. The heat is too wearing and he doesn't yet have the strength. He's very young and very untrained. That's enough for today.

Qui-Gon Jinn's words from the netherworld of the Force were true, honest and firm. Tannerlin would not finish the task asked of him. It was not yet within the realm of his capabilities.

"Yes, Master. He tries hard, but is limited."

You are the only training he has. Being a Jedi is no longer his priority in life. As much as he cares about you, that is not enough to move him beyond his abilities. Release him from this task before he collapses and you get the ear bending wrath of his brother.

"I was only trying to help him. The stronger he is with the Force, the better he can defend himself and his brother if needed. I want this boy to live a long and safe life. He represents the few of us left in the galaxy."

True. However, he does not have the skills of a normal thirteen year old apprentice. And it will do no good to push him to impossible extremes. It will only lead to feelings of doubt and failure. Remember your teachings, Obi-Wan. Know your student and his abilities. Tannerlin will try very hard for you, but his training needs to be fair and balanced.

"I know, Master. He's not used to such weather extremes. He cannot find the necessary focus."

Release him, Padawan.

Ben moved his gaze toward the struggling boy sitting a distance away. He approached and set a hand on his shoulder. "That's enough, young one. We should retreat inside. You need to cool down."

For a moment, Tanner resisted, wanting to finish the task. Wanting to find success for his part-time mentor. His body betrayed those thoughts. He broke his focus and opened his eyes to see Ben's beside him.

The long sleeve of his tunic quickly wiping at his brow, Tanner said,"It's very hot here, Ben. I'm sorry I couldn't lift the speeder. It's a lot more than

what I've attempted before and maybe I could do better with different conditions, but... it's really hot here. I mean really, really hot."

Ben smiled at the boy, helped him stand and move inside the hovel. The ventilation unit moved cooler air through the structure and gave them both a break from the intense heat of mid-day Tatooine. A small wet towel was handed to Tanner and he wiped his face and neck. Ben retrieved a fresh shirt from the boy's travel bag and assisted him in removing the sweat soaked tunic currently stuck to his upper body.

"Better?" Ben asked.

"Some. I still feel all sticky though. You are impossibly strong to live here, Ben. Dash is right, is there really a need for two suns in one sky? It seems like overkill."

"Probably not. Here," a cool drink was given to the boy. "Drink it all. It's easy to get dehydrated and your effort was profound."

Tanner accepted the drink. "Thank you. Tastes good. Maybe I can never learn how to lift something that heavy while facing other foes. My body was trying to combat the heat and I couldn't find enough focus. I moved it sideways a few inches, but that's all. Do you think I'll be able to do it one day?"

Before responding, Ben gave considerable thought to Qui-Gon's words of moments ago. "Perhaps. Or perhaps not." He said honestly. "There is no failure if you cannot. Without full training, your abilities will be limited. My hope is that you can use the Force as your ally when you most need it."

"I see essence around things. Trees and nature. Some people. Sometimes if I focus hard enough. Dashen's is easier to notice when he's upset."

"Yes, the Living Force. Qui-Gon was a master of it. He found it most relaxing for meditative purposes."

"It fluctuates, doesn't it? With people."

"It can with emotions, yes."

"Maybe that's why I can see Dashen so clearly. He worries. A lot."

Sound familiar, Padawan?

Qui-Gon again. Ben grimaced. He was well known for his anxiety as an apprentice and as a Jedi Master. Qui-Gon never had trouble finding him within the Living Force.

"Your brother worries, yes. I can sympathize."

"You worried a lot too?"

"Still do. It's not something I ever grew from. Qui-Gon attempted to provide relief, but I was so concerned with not failing him and following my Jedi principles. Then when he fell, I was not quite prepared for a future without his guidance. I made many mistakes. Now I have other things to distress over. You are good for your brother though, you can help his worries."

"I think I cause some of them. Not on purpose. Kind of just by being myself. He's always afraid he'll lose me like he did his real brother."

Ben nodded. "Fear is a powerful emotion. One of the most difficult to understand and control. Perhaps you should get your brother to meditate with you to relieve some of his concerns."

"That won't ever happen. He finds most of what I like exceedingly boring. I try to convince him, but he won't budge. Dashen is stubborn. You know, you've met him."

"That, I have." Ben chuckled out, holding his stomach as the laugh rolled into his belly.

Tanner beamed at seeing his friend with the large smile on his face. He couldn't recall ever seeing Ben smile like that before. It filled him with warmth. "It's nice to see you laugh, Ben."

"It's nice to laugh. Moments are far and between." Ben studied the boy. "You look like you're cooling down. Keep drinking."

"Feels better."

"Good."

The hovel door opened and Dashen pounded through, sweat pouring off him. "You know, Ben," he started. "Two suns. Is it really necessary? Kinda seems like overkill."

A look exchanged, Ben and Tanner broke out into another laugh.

"Laugh it up, will you? It's hot as Sith's hell out there or worse. I need a drink and a nap." Dashen stumbled in and shuffled himself onto the floor directly in front of the vent unit so the coolest of air played against his face. Black hair was plastered wet, shirt was soaked and he looked pathetic. As Ben had done with him, Tanner grabbed his brother a cool towel, new tunic and cold drink. "Thanks, Mouse. Remind me to schedule my vacation elsewhere next time. Tatooine is hell. How to you do it, Ben?"

With a shrug, Ben said, "I have to. It's that important. So, I accept it. My destiny. My fate."

"Yeah well, your destiny sucks. Sorry. That was wrong to say. This place is horrible."

"It's all right, Dashen."

"So, Mouse, how'd the training go? Lifting things and tossing them around? You hurl any furniture at Ben?"

He is very much like you, Obi-Wan. The more he talks, the more I see it. The same anxieties and the same mouth.

Ben didn't verbally respond to Qui-Gon's teasing but did sigh loud enough for him to hear.

"I couldn't lift the land speeder off the ground." Tanner admitted. Disappointed.

Dashen's eyes got wide. "Lift the land speeder? Off of the ground? Huh. Didn't realize that was on the table today."

"It was too hot for me to focus enough to make a good effort. But I can practice at home."

"Oh yeah, sure. Colton will be more than happy to provide a speeder for you to throw at people. That'll go over well."

"Dash, I'm not throwing it at anyone. Just lifting and moving. Like I do with the rocks and other objects."

"You mean the objects that fly toward my head during your practice?"

"Well, yes. Those."

"Uh huh. How about you practice without causing damage that I can't pay for. Try lifting Colton, that could be fun."

"That's a worse idea than using his speeder. He'd strangle me."

As the pair bickered, Ben's head toggled back and forth watching and listening, his sun-worn face brightening at the nonsensical conversation. It was difficult to describe this moment. Comforting? Welcomed? Craved? All of the above? It had been many painful years since he was able to just sit and enjoy without bad things happening. These two, dare he think that they even made him... happy?

Happy. Yes, the one emotion that had escaped him forever ago. To have it return, even for a fleeting moment...

Padawan, they are good for you. You've less tension when they visit. Sadly, it's not safe for them to come more often. I will say, however, that all of this, it's good for Dashen as well. Indeed you and he do share anxieties. To an extent, you see yourself in him. And that is not a criticism, simply an observance.

Qui-Gon wasn't wrong, Ben thought. He rarely was. Honestly, he wished he could help Dashen with those anxieties, but there was no possibility of that. They each had their own issues. Ben was long past finding solace for his worries. Dashen had a brother that loved him and did his best to help him with his. Ben had a dead Jedi Master and haunting memories of the horrendous failings of past.

But... things were what they were and nothing would change that.

"Tannerlin, how about you simply practice with whatever large object you have available that will not lead you to being noticed, shot at, or strangled." Ben said.

"And that object is cannot be me." Came Dashen's response. "I am not being fodder for your magic, Mouse. The last time I ended up with two black eyes."

Tanner grinned coyly and brought Dashen another cold drink. "We'll see what happens, big brother."

"Why does that not instill me with confidence?"

"Even you have to admit, I've gotten much better with my control."

"Sure. Instead of randomly flinging things at my head, you purposely pick one object and fling it. I've gone from two black eyes to one. Progress! This is what I get for living with a Jedi kid."

Ben cleared his throat. It was time to intervene. "Gentlemen, I hate to put an end to this entertaining quarrel, but I do wish for us to get in another Force lesson before the day is out. A couple of tasks that will strengthen your concentration."

Back straight, head up, Tanner said, "I'm ready."

Obi-Wan. Go easy. The boy is tired, but he will try. Exhaustion serves only to act against him. Patience. He will get there, but in time. There is no rush. I wish you to enjoy your time with him. It doesn't have to be a constant flow of lessons.

Ben nodded to no one. Dashen caught it, yet left it alone. Talking to the ghost of the dead guy again, he'd say. Annoying and honest and telling it like it was. Dashen was all those things, but he also loved his brother more than he loved himself. So he continually kept a close eye on anyone and everyone around him.

Obi-Wan. Dashen knows I'm speaking to you as much as he finds it 'creepy'. His word, as you know. He watches everything carefully when the boy is involved. Always seeing and protecting. Always wary, even with those he can trust. You push too much and he'll intervene. Go easy.

Ben nodded to the visitant voice. "On second thought, Tannerlin, how about we skip the lessons and just talk. You are tired from your efforts this afternoon. It's better that we be well rested for practice tomorrow."

"No training?"

"No training. We can talk about anything you'd like. Ask me any question. I will answer if I can."

Tanner brightened at the idea. Sitting and talking about whatever with whoever was one of his favorite pastimes.

"You might regret that one, Ben." Dashen smirked. "The kid lives to sit and talk and talk and sit. Next to perching on the floor and staring at walls, it's his favorite activity. And since your own days consist of talking to yourself, yakking with the ghost of a dead guy, or having one-way conversations with your eeopie friend outside, this could be rather exhausting. Right, Tanner?"

A big brother hand ruffled Tanner's light brown hair, mussing it messily.

—-

Next hours were spent deep in conversation. At some point, Dashen checked out, falling asleep on Ben's bed while the two former Jedi rambled on and on about nothing that even remotely concerned him. The discussion went on as Tatooine's twins suns set and the extreme darkness of the desert overtook the arid landscape. At that point, Ben figured it best to call an end to the day.

"Tannerlin. I enjoyed this." He said, setting a hand on Tanner's arm. "Thank you for humoring an old man."

"Ben, you're not old."

"Perhaps not in age, but in everything else."

Tanner shrugged. "Maybe. Do you think you'll ever leave this place?"

There was a question. It's one Ben had wondered on since he'd landed here. It's one where the answer in his head never changed and the reality never would. "No, I think not. I believe when I finally do leave, it will not be in the physical sense."

"You'll die here." It was a statement, not a comment from the boy.

"I will or will die in service to what I am here for." Ben's response - not so much sadness as it was simply the reality of his life.

Tanner nodded, accepting fact as he tried to comfort his friend. "Then I hope to visit many times more until that end comes."

"I hope for that as well. You and your brother are a moment's break from the desolation. I do appreciate that you've chosen to spend some of your time with me. That you think of me, it means a great deal. At home on Terra, I am certain there are many other things to occupy your days."

"There are, but I need to come here. You're my friend."

Ben's face flushed just enough to warm him inside. "I share the sentiment, young one. But, it's late and you should rest for tomorrow. You're okay to fit in next to your brother?"

Tanner nodded. "Yeah it's fine, he makes a good pillow."

Didn't take long after crawling in next to his brother, for Tanner to fall into a deep and peaceful sleep. Once he was out, Dashen's eyes cracked open to see Ben tidying up before his own rest.

"He means that, you know. Tanner does. That you're his friend. I don't know how it was for you guys back in Jedi land, but he takes that word and the oath around it quite seriously."

Ben turned to see Dashen's keen green eyes watching him from his spot tucked behind his younger brother.

"If he likes someone, he openly makes sure they know. No guessing involved. It's one of his things. It's a big deal to him. And to that end, it usually makes it a big deal to the other half of that friendship. You make it to Tanner's friend list and that's huge."

"Yes, I feel that from him. The Force around him radiates in the most positive way I've felt from anyone in a long time. A long, long time. I suppose I'm privileged to be counted on that list of his."

"Damn right you are." The words came out as a whisper, but the intention was clear. They were both fortunate to be a part of the boy's life.

Ben's lips quirked up in a grin as he brought out a second blanket and draped it over the resting brothers. "I will be certain to remember that, Dashen. Sleep well."

—-

Morning came as did a minimal breakfast. Training ensued.

By this time in their visits, the boys had learned enough to bring food with them on their travel. Ben hadn't much in the way of edible eats, so he too appreciated the cuisine. With enough in their bellies, they ventured outside for another go at the speeder. The suns were still rising and the beginnings of the most intense heat of the day was a few hours off.

Tanner and Ben sat in silent meditation together. Dashen watched from a safe distance in the event that one of the Jedi managed to fling a speeder in his direction. Maybe Tannerlin was limited, but Ben had a lot of power in his magic.

Tanner opened his pale brown eyes to focus on the speeder.

Ben stood and walked a distance away, wanting the boy to do this on his own. Ben spoke to him from that distance. A soft and easy tone; one he remembered Qui-Gon using with him long ago when he struggled with an exercise. It was a tone he'd never mastered with Anakin as his apprentice, but Tanner was different. There was none of that defiant determination or braggart attitude. Instead, there was a love of learning and a want to try hard. Ben knew there was no possible way he'd actually get the speeder off the ground - perhaps he'd never reach that level - but it wouldn't stop him from learning as he tried.

"Feel the Force, Tannerlin. Let it become you, part of you, and then focus your will toward the object. Don't strain. Don't force it. Keep your body relaxed and your mind will follow. Find your breath and hold it deep and steady. Reach a hand out to guide your focus. Slow and easy. Each breath, each motion should be deliberate. If the Force moves away from you, step back and begin again, no matter how many times. Keep the steady breath. Deep. In. Out. In. Out."

Tanner listened intently and followed the instruction to the letter. He reset himself at least eight times in the process but never lost patience.

He would have made a fine Jedi, Obi-Wan. Perhaps not so much in the field where combat or saber skills were key, but he has the patience of one much older and wiser than his years. Peacekeeper. Negotiator. Instructor. It saddens me to see such potential and natural ability where it cannot be used to it's fullest reach.

Qui-Gon's voice. Observing. Watching. Seeing so much in a young boy who'd been violently orphaned from the entire Jedi Order at the age of nine.

"Indeed, Qui-Gon. Though I would not agree with you about his natural ability not being used to it's fullest. This boy has his place in the galaxy where he's needed most. The intent observation, the patience, the want to be a part of something. Perhaps the Force had this in mind for him all along."

You believe that there is more to his future than simply being Dashen's brother?

"I don't know. Dashen would not have survived without this boy. Even he admits that fact. Perhaps it's Dashen who has more to his future than meets the eye."

That would be an interest and a surprise. Though there is definitely much more to him than what lies on the surface. Dashen hides himself well. Allows few to see inside. I was pleased he opened up to you last evening, however brief that it was. He struggles with many things. You hold much in common.

Ben turned his attention away from the invisible voice to see Tannerlin continuing to reset himself. And still, there was no loss of patience, no giving up. Then... the smallest of movements. It was only a wing and only bare inches, but the speeder - or a tiny part of it - moved.

Eyes big and smile bigger, Tanner bounced onto this knees and then bounced up and down, feet coming completely off the ground as he did. "It moved! Ben, it moved up! I saw it. I saw it. I saw it! I felt it too! Dash, did you see that?" The boy was up, running to the speeder and pushing at the wing as if to make sure it was real and not a figment of his imagination. Then he turned back to his brother and bounded over to him. "Dash, I did it, I did it, I did it!"

Excitement, contagious. Contagious smiles were shared as Tanner tossed arms around his brother's waist.

Never let it be said that there is nothing but darkness in the galaxy.

Qui-Gon's voice again for Ben's ears only.

Could be this is the boy's purpose as well. Pushing light through the darkest of clouds. He moved that object the barest of inches, but the sheer joy that followed. It's a glimmer of intense light in extreme darkness.

"Tannerlin," Ben began, "Well done! You were patient and resilient. Most impressive. You felt it then, didn't you? The Force. Yourself. Interconnecting perfectly for that few second window. You were one."

"I did feel it. It was like nothing before. I know the Force and I work with it, but this was like you said. A perfect connection. It was warm and reassuring. I want to experience that again! I want to try again! I know I can move it and maybe further and..."

Ben smiled and set a hand on the boy's forearm to settle him. "It's very exciting, but know your limitations. Beyond the excitement, how do you feel right now?"

"Well," Tanner's shoulders slumped. "I feel tired. That was a lot of focus and for a long time. How long was it?"

"Almost two hours, Mouse." Dashen said. "I admit, as bored as I am with you guys most of the time, that was kinda fascinating."

"You didn't fall asleep?"

Dashen chuckled. "Not this time. A victory of my own. Ha! Who knew I had it in me?"

"You do have your moments, big brother. You're proud of me?"

"Every second of every day, Mouse."

"Even when you're bored out of your mind?"

"Yup. Even then. But, as thrilling as this is, I want you to take a break. You're tired. Time out for a bit, yeah?"

"Okay. But before... Ben, can you...?

No need for further explanation, Ben knew what the boy asked. With seemingly little effort, the older Jedi breathed deep, held his right hand forward and watched the speeder rise, hover, and then spin slowly under the Jedi's power before being gently returned to the ground.

"You see that Dash? I'll be able to do that one day."

"I hope so, kid. You seem to be able to do whatever you put your mind to, so I wouldn't doubt it. But keep your reality in check too. Could be you never get to that level. And that's okay. Could be you get there and keep going. Who knows what the future holds."

"I know. I won't get my hopes up too high." Tanner's response was honest and accepting. It made Ben smile at the young maturity. So much different than a boy he had raised to be a Jedi years ago - the destroyer of the Jedi.

He shook off the negative thoughts of Anakin. "Tannerlin, your brother is right. The future is uncertain, but the Force will guide you to where you are destined to be."

—-

"Hey Ben, is Master Qui-Gon proud of you?"

It was an impromptu question on the final day of the visit. Dashen stopped his packing to stare at the two Jedi. He searched Ben's face for any indication of irritation at the question, but the older Jedi offered none. Instead, there was a wistfulness in the aged blue eyes as they floated upward to an unseen voice.

Should you not know, Padawan, the answer is yes. I am and have always been. The boy just wants to make sure that you yourself are aware of that fact.

Ben nodded. Eyes shining. "He is proud of me, yes. He's mentioned it before."

Dashen rolled his eyes as if to say, yup, he just mentioned it ten seconds ago in your head, old man.

"Why do you ask?" Ben questioned.

"I know he's proud of you, how can he not be? But I wanted to be sure that you knew that he was proud of you."

I'd hate to say I told you so, Obi-Wan, but...

Ben shuffled a laugh at his dead master's words but kept eye contact with the boy. "That's kind of you." Then his eyes drifted to Dashen who shrugged with raised eyebrows, also in an I-told-you-so gesture.

"You're his friend, Ben. What can I say?" Memories of their recent late night conversation. "Consider yourself lucky and move on."

—-

Sam the eeopie nipped for the third time, this time nailing Dashen's elbow.

"Look, you blasted beast, one more bite and next visit I will roast you for dinner. Hear me?" Sam shook his head and sneezed in Dashen's face. "Your creature is disgusting, Ben. Just letting you know. And he's kinda mean too."

"Oh, Dashen, he's a gentle soul. Sam just chooses to not like you."

"Dash, you just threatened to cook and eat him. Why would he like you?" Sam nudged at Tanner's palm, allowing his small ears to be scratched.

"I threatened him because he bit me three times. Three! And I have the seeping blood to prove it. See?" He jutted his reddening elbow towards his brother. "Damn eeopie. Damn desert. Damn Jedi. All of you! Damn it!"

He is an acquired tasted, isn't he? Perhaps, Obi-Wan, you are correct about Tannerlin's purpose being Dashen. The boy is the only one with the patience to withstand him for any extended period. I do believe he'd test even my patience.

That last part made Ben snort as he gave Tannerlin a leg up. Dashen refused the help and hopped onto the beast behind his brother.

"As always, exercise extreme caution in the spaceport. Sam will find his way home. Be safe my friends. Look after each other. And Dashen? Be nice to Sam or your knees will match your elbows before you make it to Mos Eisley."

"Funny, Ben. That's good. You're a funny guy out here in the middle of nowhere."

Tanner elbowed his brother in the stomach.

"Oooof! What the hell, Tanner?"

"That's for being more annoying than usual. Let's go, Sam. Ignore my brother. I promise, I won't let him cook you up and eat you."

Sam grunted approval as Ben smiled from the side. "I mean it. Both of you. Look after each other. Dashen... please..."

"Yeah, yeah, I know."

It was Ben's silent plea for safety of them both, but in particular for Tannerlin. The galaxy needed his kind to survive.

"Bye Ben! I love you!"

Tanner's goodbye. Always a knife to the heart. Obi-Wan reflected back to one of his conversations with Dashen - that you never had to guess where you stood with Tannerlin. He'd make sure you knew.

"You are a friend that I love dearly, Tannerlin. Dashen."

Dashen gave him a look. "I'm good with whatever. Take care, Ben. It's been weird, as usual. Next time!"

The pair plodded off on the humped back of the eeopie. As it usually did, Ben's mood changed about fourteen times in the moments before they disappeared into the distance.

"It gets harder each time. Their leaving." He said aloud, hoping Qui-Gon was nearby in his netherworld home.

You've come to enjoy them so much. And as Tannerlin grows, so does Luke, and one day this will be no more. You feel that each visit.

"It's a strange numbing feeling. It's real, but it's not, and I am not ever ready for it to end, but it must. One day."

Obi-Wan, be grateful for the time you have. Memories can be impossible obstacles. Or they can be reminders of all good things.

"I only wish my mind would focus more on the good things and less on the obstacles. Master. Will you meditate with me?"

You only need ask, Padawan.

"Tannerlin. If he's destined for more, I can't see it. His brother needs him though and always will. If I'm to continue to play a small role in that story, I will look forward to it until my time here is done."

Not so small a role as you may think. For Tannerlin, your role is immense. Do not underestimate your importance in this role, my Padawan. You give him connection to his past that he can find from no other.

"My chance to leave a legacy that isn't one of betrayal and murder and failure."

Obi-Wan, enough. You know better than to dwell on what you cannot change. You failed no one except perhaps yourself. The past is past. It cannot be altered. The future... it could be anything. Your role in that is immeasurable. Tannerlin plays a part in that future. And if it's nothing more than being there for his brother and being there for you when you need more than just a disembodied voice or blue-glowing spirit nearby, then that is what the Force will bring. Trust in the Force, Obi-Wan. Trust in yourself. Trust in my guidance. And trust in that boy who wants only to care about you, asking nothing in return. He is something extraordinarily rare.

Ben nodded and walked inside his hovel. Falling carefully downward, he sat cross legged on the floor until that blue-glowing spirit materialized before him. Qui-Gon. Ben sighed. It was one thing to hear the voice, but seeing the face of the man that raised him from a boy to a man, from student to Jedi... it gave him comfort he could not explain.

"Master, will you lead?"

"I will. Close your eyes."

And as they had so often when Ben was younger, Qui-Gon connected them through their shared bond, and then slowly descended them into the Force. Together.

END