I do not own the rights to this song
The Most Fashionable Faction belongs to Stupendium and Harry101UK
Also, don't forget to review and I'm gonna release a new chapter in My list of shorts
called "Pandora" see if you can guess where that came from in the reviews
OK, this is ScoutNout signing out
It's April Fools and we all know what that means in the Loud House. Since the revelation of Lily taking over the pranks after Luan retired, everyone's on edge for any possibility. Lincoln was checking to see if she left any traps in his room when the doorbell rang. He answered the door and found a package with a winged shoe symbol on the porch. Lincoln brings it inside and sees a note taped to the front which reads:
We have a party
everything you need is inside
Come to the barn
Lincoln opened the package and received the Greased Lightning, Flap Jack, and Sandman. Lincoln went upstairs put on the clothes replaced his Digit Divulger for his original Scout bandages, and swapped his bat for the Sandman. He then pulled out his mini-teleporter and went to the designated location.
He arrived at the barn and knocked on the door. Where he was greeted by Medic.
"Ah, Lincoln you've arrived come in the party's almost starting." greeted Medic, who was wearing the Colonel's Coat, and German's Gonzila.
He got in and saw his comrades and BLU standing opposite of each other. The place had colored lights and a banner in the center that said 'ANNUAL HAT-OFF' with 3 of the letters on each side being opposite colors. "Go to your spot, the song's about to start." Medic said. "Song? What song?" Lincoln asked. "You'll see."
He wanted to know why but would find out when the music started playing.
3, 2, 1
BEGIN!
SCOUT:
Watch out! The scout's out and about.
Running around, bringing bonks right down on your scalp
Do you even know who you're talking to here?
I'm a streak of greased lightning, keep fighting for years
I'm a stunner, number one run and gunner
My beats bring the heat 'cause I'm a sweet double jumper
Your finger's on the trigger but before you get to pull it
I'll take a sip of fizz and go whizzing past your bullets
I'm on it like a rocket on a course to freakin' pound ya
Call me Super-Sonic 'cause I'm running rings around ya
I'm a dab hand with a sandman
I'm the baddest in the badlands
I'm a speed freak on a kill streak
See a blur and then it's bang bang
DEMO:
I'm the Demo! Explosions are my M.O.
Tyrant from the highlands getting violent on the bellows
The only thing more volatile than me would be my ammo
I'll leave you blown to pieces while my piece is screaming blammo
Did this have whisky in or was it nitroglycerine?
I'll find out on the way out if I'm spouting flaming p*ss again
'Cause if I live another day my liver might go anyway
And I'd rather go in glory so in war I won't be giving in
I suffer for my art
I've got sulphur on the heart
This tartan Spartan's gonna tear you apart.
Fire shots at the Cyclops, it never ends well
Oh, they're gonna have to glue you back together in hell
SNIPER:
Zoom, red dot
Boom, headshot
Your head's got a new lead clot
Bring you to a dead stop, leave you with your head popped
Another target on the list that can be checked off
'Cause on a mission I am viciously efficient
My vitals just my rifle and a set of jars to p*ss in
When it comes to assassins you could say I'm high-calibre
Yanking my machete from your head like it's Excalibur
No mercy mercenary, I'll take you down like cattle when
My true forte's in 2Fort playing blood sports on the battlements
Spray your brain before you know what's happening
Safe to say, no way that you'll be wearing hats again
If you're seeing red or you're feeling blue
If you wanna bust caps and wear them too
If you like warfare in stylish headear
Well have we got the game for you
No there isn't any greater
Military millinery simulator
We fight all day to find out who's
The most fashionable faction in TF2
SOLDIER:
Listen up 'cause I won't say it again
You'd better not be sissies because war is not a game!
Unless of course it's war games, then I'm all for games
Hope you're keeping score because numerate I sure ain't!
I am good at fighting, ask Sun Tzu
I taught him all he knows in the art of Shovel Fu
Way back in ancient China when I met him one night
He said Soldier's really cool and the best at winning fights
Now I win all the fight money wherever I go
'Cause my rockets go BOOM then you explode
Now, the army told me that I was crazy
But I wrote this song so I'm clearly amazing
SPY:
Gentlemen, it won't be gentle when
I sneak into your base and steal the faces of your helpless friends
Stealing your briefcase really was a brief case
You think you're smart but I have the intelligence
Be a man! Why do you have to die screaming?
I shoot you, take the loot and take my suit for dry cleaning.
I'm not cheating you ignorant swine
I creep in and sneak things right into your spine
When I fight with my butterfly it stings like a bee
So tonight tell your mother 'hi', give her a kiss from me
I'm debonair with deadly flair, I'm anyone and anywhere
The face your mother wakes to is the last you'll ever see
HEAVY:
I am heavy weapons guy
I make puny babies cry
Want to live? Rule one:
Don't. Touch. My. Gun.
May be slow, no need to rush ya
When i'm rolling with Natascha
Fill you dead with holes we crush ya
Leave you cold like snow in Russia.
That's puny gun! I punch more damage!
Chew you up for lunch like sandvich
Think you can outrun me? Prove it
I'd like to see you outrun bullet
If you're seeing red or you're feeling blue
If you wanna bust caps and wear them too
If you like warfare in stylish headwear
Well have we got the game for you
No there isn't any greater
Military millinery simulator
We fight all day to find out who's
The most fashionable faction in TF2
ENGINEER:
Howdy! The engineer's in the field
Farm boy charm with a megaton yield
I've got a cranium laced with uranium
Dispense your offense with the weapons I wield
I'm hot stuff, 'cause I've a hundred degrees
So if you boil my blood you'll get burned on Steam
I'm over qualified to leave you nullified and tan your sorry hide
You'd better run and hide or die by my machines
Just a friendly Engy
Preventing entry with a deadly sentry
Each practical problem I solve, my skill mounts
The only thing higher than my IQ is my kill count
PYRO:
Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire!
Emboldened scolding folds of red and gold are my desire!
Its my sacred duty, keep the beauty burning higher
Leave you dismembered in the embers, every felling swells the pyre!
I'm a terror from the nether, something that you've never seen
With a charcoal soul, heart pumping kerosene
You've met your match you'll be a charred patch on the floorboards
I'll strike a match and strike the match off of the scoreboard
What's it matter if my brain's deranged when I snuff you out?
Boy, does it look lovely out! Candy canes and fluffy clouds!
Racking up the kills as I'm cranking up the grill
Easy to blow you away when you're just powder
MEDIC:
Got a little headache? You'd better call the Medic!
Were you wanting anesthetic? Really don't be so pathetic
That burning is a bird within your sternum that snuck in whilst I was working
But I think a bloody dove is quite a lovely aesthetic
You grazed your knee? Well it seems to me
You need invasive exploratory surgery
See I may have a little uncertainty
Between patient, Specimen? It's a blur to me.
Get the point of my syringes at your hiney
I'll Übercharge and buff you 'til you're shiny
I could fix you quick with my medi-gun
The procedure is painless but that's no fun…
If you're feeling blue or you're seeing red
If what's on your mind's what's on your head
Who wants to battle
When there's catalogues of hats to browse instead?
It's not how far you push the cart
What matters is the noble art
Of dressing heads in dandy threads
To wear whilst you are blown apart
If you're seeing red or you're feeling blue
If you wanna bust caps and wear them too
If you like warfare in stylish headwear
Well have we got the game for you
No there isn't any greater
Military millinery simulator
We fight all day to find out who's
The most fashionable faction in TF2
"That was amazing." Lincoln said
"Indeed." Medic agreed
Lincoln sticked around longer than he'd thought. There he learned of his teammates interesting backgrounds, drank a little alcohol which tasted bitter for his taste, and even interreacted with the BLUs even though they were enemies. Afterwards he left on his teleporter. He got back home and double jumped back into his window changed into his night attire and went to bed.