Author's Note:
A special thanks to Hildr53 for beta-reading this chapter and for making amazing suggestions for improvements :) I highly recommend her excellent story Dragonsick available on AO3.
Enjoy the chapter along with the first venture into another character's perspective ;)
Chapter CIV – Your Stalwart Standing Fast
He paced by the city gates somewhat nervously.
Why was he nervous? This was just like any other mission. They only needed to discuss tactics briefly beforehand to ensure their harmonization in battle. Other than that, there was nothing to be nervous about.
He heard the tavern door open in the distance.
He watched as Aeyrin and Bishop emerged, both armed and armored, before they stopped right by the inn entrance. She stepped on her tiptoes to kiss him in parting. Even from back by the gates, Casavir could see that Bishop was reluctant to let her go. He wrapped his arms around her armored body tightly, prolonging the exchange.
That bandit was worried about everything that could be revealed about his past. It was obvious.
What still wasn't obvious were his motives.
Why? Why would he be with her still? What was he planning? Why was it worth it to make so many more enemies than he already had? Why did he have to drag her into his life? Did he expect her to protect him from the law? Or from Thorn?
Or was he still working for that monster? The thought occurred to Casavir sometimes… but… this seemed like too elaborate of a way to get her to Thorn, if that was the plan. Especially when they usually had… other methods.
But Aeyrin said that they met even before she knew she was the Dragonborn.
None of this made any sense to him.
Especially the fact that she still couldn't see Bishop for who he really was. He was manipulating her somehow, Casavir was sure of it.
And he'd be damned if he let him hurt her like he did Elisie.
But she was so adamant about trusting that scoundrel. By now, anything that Casavir said about him, she just dismissed as a bias. He feared that the only way she'd ever be convinced was after it was too late.
The two of them parted at last. Bishop headed towards the center of the city while Aeyrin turned to the gates and walked towards Casavir.
She gave him a warm smile as she approached him. Such a beautiful, kind and earnest smile…
That is enough. Focus.
He returned her smile and inclined his head in greeting: "My lady. Are you ready to set out?"
She nodded rather eagerly. Just seeing someone offer to help out with no prospect of money or reward was heartwarming. It seemed like such a long time since he's seen an admirable willing attitude like that.
He has been in Skyrim for years, caught in the midst of a brutal civil war while attempting to keep the men that were sent to him in line. At times, it seemed to him as if the Order's headquarters sent paladins up north as a punishment.
The men and women under his command were good people, often with good intentions, but many of them did not seem fully prepared to face the difficulties of a paladin's life. The nobility tended to make a sport out of them and it was often too easy to fall into that trap. The temptation of succumbing to corruption was behind every corner and he was starting to feel as if he didn't have a second when he could relax, when he would be surrounded only by those he could trust. The uncertainty of the sincerity of the people he commanded was mind-numbingly tiring.
That was why he refused to have him at his back, even if it meant that Aeyrin wouldn't agree to accompany him. There was hardly anyone on Mundus that he trusted less than Bishop.
But luckily, she didn't refuse.
She was one of the few people he had met lately that actually made him feel… at ease and hopeful. He saw the gleam of idealism in her eyes that reminded him so much of his youth and of the people he trained with in the Imperial City.
But the harshness of Skyrim could eventually extinguish even the brightest flame. And seeing her with Bishop… it just broke his heart to see her plummeting towards that inevitable darkness.
He desperately wanted to spare her from that.
If only she'd let him.
…
"So the others are attacking the lairs already?"
Aeyrin turned her head to him as they waded through the knee-deep snow into the mountains around Solitude.
"Some of them, my lady. Some are waiting until after noon. We have made a careful plan to cover all the bases just at the right time in order to catch by surprise any of those beasts that may attempt to escape or warn the other lairs," Casavir explained while his eyes vigilantly scanned their surroundings constantly.
"Impressive. It's nice to see how well your operation works. Thank you for letting me come with you," she gave him that kind smile again with her black eyes glittering at him. He enjoyed looking into them. It made him so oddly at ease. He has never felt such comfort from simply looking into another person's eyes.
But he couldn't get distracted with her. It was a danger he was fully aware of.
These types of thoughts could lead him quickly astray.
"I would be a fool to decline any offer of help, my lady," he smiled at her gently.
Her response, however, was an uncomfortable stare, followed by an averted gaze.
"I… that is… my lady, we talked about this…" he sighed dejectedly. He really didn't want to get back to this subject again. He hated how often their conversation steered back towards Bishop but, on the other hand, all he wanted to do was to finally make her see what he saw.
To finally rid her of his corrupting presence.
"I know… I didn't say anything…" she mumbled morosely.
Why was she so intent of being around him? What could a woman like her ever see in a scum like him? Was he really that good at hiding who he truly was?
"I just… my lady… I really wish that you would believe me…" his voice carried such a defeated undertone. He wanted her to ask him to change the subject right away, but he also wanted to tell her, to finally convince her. She did not deserve to end up broken like Elisie did.
A deep sigh escaped him almost involuntarily.
He still remembered the helplessness he felt when he had heard that Elisie left. He would remember that feeling for the rest of his life.
"I wish you would believe me," she retorted, shaking her head in exasperation.
This didn't lead anywhere. It never did.
"I… cannot. I've known him too long to ever believe there was any good in him. And I wish you would believe the words of someone who knows him longer," another sigh left his lips. She would argue with that, he knew she would.
And despite the inevitable trouble that it was getting her into, that stubbornness was somewhat… endearing.
"You haven't known him longer, you've met him sooner. There's a difference. You barely know him at all! The man he is now… there's good in everyone, Casavir."
The words rang in his ear like a pleasant tune. He wanted them to be true. But the time he spent caught in the midst of a merciless war has jaded him to these ideals.
He missed those pure ideals. Maybe with her around, he could learn to be hopeful again…
"The man that he was before was more than capable of making you believe he's changed…" he said regretfully. He wasn't sure what Bishop told her, but he knew that she, at the very least, had heard of Elisie and Jules. Bishop, without a doubt, twisted the story into something that suited his needs, something that made him seem like a poor tortured soul, mongering sympathy from the kind girl.
It infuriated Casavir to just be thinking about it.
Her brows were creased and her expression got more and more morose.
"My lady… perhaps we could… uhmm…" he rubbed his armored hand at the back of his neck. For some reason, he desperately wanted her eyes to gleam excitedly again and to see that kind smile spread across her face. "I… ehm… I've heard that you have assisted Queen Elisif with some troubles with a group of conjurers. Would you… would you tell me more about that?"
She seemed to take pity on his desperate attempt to change the subject.
His thoughts were still so conflicted – shouldn't he press on with the topic, to try his hardest to make her see? But with every hateful word he said about Bishop, he could see her affection for him wane.
He could not bear the sight of that.
…
Aeyrin was glad that the mood finally got a bit less tense.
Every time they talked about Bishop, it was the same. She didn't want to listen to Casavir's derision anymore, but in a strange way, she felt like she needed to convince him that he was wrong. If those two ever managed to make up, it would make her time in Solitude so much easier.
But that was probably not to be, with how stubborn both of them were. It was better to steer clear of the topic.
"So, we split the targets?" she asked as they stood in front of the cavernous entrance. She was unable to really think of any more elaborate tactics.
"Yes, I suppose that would be the best. I realize that you are… used to… well, I assure you that I am more than capable of watching your back even in the midst of battle," he gave her a reassuring smile.
"Casavir, I used to travel alone before I met Bishop and before I knew how to Shout too. You really don't need to worry about me." It was true that she got used to relying on Bishop to cover her all too fast, but that didn't mean that she was incapable of handling herself anymore.
"I… I didn't mean to imply… My lady, I in no way doubt your abilities. I merely…" he stammered in embarrassment. She knew what he meant though, it was unfair to let him squirm like that.
"I know, Casavir. We'll watch each other's backs," she smiled at him kindly and placed a hand briefly on his cheek.
She didn't want him embarrassed, but it was still too much fun to make him a little flustered. She kind of began to understand why Bishop did that to her all the time. The blush that spread over his cheeks and the nervous clearing of his throat were so charming.
"Y-yes my lady. I will do everything to protect you," he nodded as a gentle smile spread across his face. She liked this side of him so much. He exuded such… safety, such steadfastness and kindness.
She was reminded again of the story that Azshan told her last night.
It must have been so uncomfortable and exhausting for him to deal with the nobility. He seemed much more at ease here, with his armor gleaming in the midday sun, with his greatsword at his back as he put on that helmet with the carved wings on his head – his 'tin-head'. That's what she's always imagined paladins to be, not glorified wheedling entertainment for the rich.
Casavir led the way, weaving through the narrow corridors of the cavern.
He mentioned that it was the smallest of the lairs – it was just the two of them after all, the others went in larger numbers. But he did suspect that the leader of this clan would be hiding in this cavern. Aeyrin noted a few crumbled objects that were definitely originally part of a Nordic barrow – it seemed very similar to the cavern near Dragon Bridge.
They reached a passage where voices echoed through. The telltale raspiness of a Dunmer's voice was ringing around them, signaling his presence in the chamber ahead. They listened for a while – it sounded like there were three of the monsters ahead. They weren't saying anything very intelligible, but at least they could get their approximate numbers.
"May I?" Aeyrin whispered and inclined her head towards the end of the corridor with a sly smirk. She was kind of excited to test the spells that Azshan had taught her.
Casavir nodded uncertainly. He obviously had no idea what she was planning.
She crept up forward in the hallway until she stopped just around the corner from the chamber. She crouched down, pressing her hand on the ground, and a shimmer spread around her fingers as the warm-white glittering arcane symbols drew themselves on the ground in fluid motions. Finally a ring encircled the symbols, leaving the rune trap set and ready.
She walked back to Casavir carefully and silently.
He seemed rather surprised at her. The spells probably weren't taught to anyone outside the Order.
"Ready?" she whispered, winking at him.
He nodded and unfastened his claymore. He stood in front of her in the corridor, ready to slash at any of those creatures the second they reached them.
Aeyrin grasped her mace and slammed it as hard as she could into the cavernous wall. The noise instantly made the sounds from the chamber ahead stop as the vampires pricked up their ears. She hit the wall again and the rushing steps of the creatures followed, closing in on the corridor.
The first unsuspecting one stepped right onto the trap.
It was instant. She had no idea that it would be this powerful.
The vampire got engulfed by a bright blinding light and a high-pitched shriek escaped its mouth as it practically burst into flames.
The other two staggered for a bit, staring at their fallen clansman in shock, but they recovered quickly. Their hands flew to grasp at their weapons, their fangs sharp and bared as they charged forward.
Casavir heaved and his sword cleaved one of the lunging vampires in two with a powerful swing. She almost got caught up staring at his prowess instead of helping. She realized herself a while later and lit her hand with the warm-white light again.
The beam of light shot forward and the last vampire screamed out in pain as the sound of sizzling flesh echoed through the corridor. Casavir turned instantly and plunged his blade into the monster's stomach. It only slid off the sharp edge slowly and slumped dead to the ground.
That seemed to be the end of it.
"Well done, my lady. I didn't realize you were taught these spells…" he creased his brows a bit, likely pondering on the practices of the Chorrol's chapter.
"Azshan taught me yesterday," she beamed proudly. It was so uplifting that she managed to get the hang of those spells so fast.
"I see… that was quite… forethoughtful of him. And you seem to be a very fast learner, my lady," he gave her an admiring smile, but his brows were still furrowed. Was that because of Azshan? Did she suspect right?
"Yes. He's a good teacher. And he talked well of you. Are you two close?" she pried curiously.
"I… I respect his abilities and his contributions to the Order, my lady," Casavir averted his eyes from her.
Well… that seemed like an answer enough.
Not that it was very surprising…
…
They cleared several following chambers rather easily, slaying in total around a dozen vampires together.
Aeyrin was a little surprised at how well this was going, since they were both more comfortable on the front lines. But strangely enough, it worked. He didn't make her stand back like the Companions always did and he seemed to be able to both get rid of his own targets and even watch her back. Anytime she staggered, she noticed him perk up, as if he was readying himself to interfere to help her side of the battle.
It was sweet, but rather unnecessary. All she needed was the opportunity and room to maneuver and she could take care of the enemies herself.
They continued forward, creeping through the halls silently. It was better than getting overwhelmed by alerting all the vampires, especially since they weren't sure of their exact numbers. She didn't even Shout the entire time, just to make sure.
As they moved forward, she noticed a soft drumming noise in her ears.
Oh no. She needed to explain quickly and make sure that Casavir didn't get caught off guard by her inability to fight.
"Casavir, listen. We need to hurry. There's this… Wall… and don't be alarmed, but… I'm gonna have to run to it and just… look at it for a while…"
He raised his brow at her in confusion, staring at her dumbfounded.
"I'll explain later, but please, you need to keep anything that's in there away from me until I'm able to fight. It only takes a while, alright? But it's getting a bit louder and we need to hurry," she nodded at him determinedly.
He still looked completely lost but, a second later, he straightened his back and his tall frame towered above her somewhat reassuringly.
"You may count on me, my lady."
She gave him a brief smile before she turned on her heel and rushed towards the chamber. She did notice the subtle hints of the old ruins hidden in the cavern before. She should have thought about this possibility, she could have warned him sooner.
Well… they had to make do somehow.
She spotted the Wall instantly and ran towards it, blasting one of the creatures with her new spell on the way. The element of surprise has always worked well for her.
The Wall was half-crumbled, but, luckily, the important part was preserved.
TIID
The light stopped blinding her after a while but… then it seemed to return, brighter than before.
What was happening?! This has never happened before!
But… the blinding light was different.
And it didn't seem to be coming from the Wall…
She turned around as the light slowly dissipated. Her jaw dropped dramatically at the sight in front of her.
Casavir was clutching his blood-covered downturned greatsword with one hand only while his other hand was twisted into a strained half-grasp with a menacing orb of warm light hovering above it. There were at least ten charred or cleaved vampire corpses around him.
Before she could react, he hurled the orb against the last creature and another flash of light blinded her at the impact. She reached out to cover her eyes instinctively, but by the time she did, the light had dissipated again.
The last vampire slumped down with a feral scream, engulfed in flames.
That was like something from a story book…
Did he even need her help there?
Casavir looked around frantically to locate any other enemies before he rushed towards her, sheathing his claymore.
"My lady! Are you alright?" he looked her over worriedly and his hands hovered slightly above her arms as if he wanted to steady her. His eyes glanced briefly at the Wall, but they returned to her in an instant.
"By the Eight… that was… you did this all yourself?! That was incredible!" She stared at him in shock. None of the beasts were even anywhere near her. She could only ever hope to take down so many enemies in such a short time by Shouting.
His cheeks blushed slightly and he cleared his throat. One of his hands finally fell upon her shoulder and rested there briefly while the other slumped down awkwardly, as if it was uncertain of how to be of use.
"I… ehm… I couldn't let them near you, my lady."
Gods… he was like a real-life knight in shining armor just then. She was pretty sure that she was staring at him with unbridled reverence in her eyes.
"What… what was that, my lady?" he looked towards the Wall in confusion.
"Oh…" she shook herself from her stunned state. "These are…"
Before she could finish, a loud snarl startled them. Two vampires emerged as if from out of nowhere.
They must have snuck up on them while they were talking…
Casavir was hit with a stream of tiny red lights and he staggered back immediately. He attempted to reach the sword on his back and his hands occasionally lit up, only for the magic to dissipate instantly.
She felt it too… the small red lights flew about the room and some of them seemed to be hovering around her making her feel… exhausted and strangely… empty. Her hand lit up, but the spell was gone instantly. She was still a bit wary of Shouting, in case more of these monsters were hiding around, so she reached for her mace and shield while the second vampire lunged at her.
Their movements were oddly difficult under the effects of the spell as they scrambled for their weapons, each of them trying to fight off a vampire of their own at the same time.
Aeyrin was the first to recover and reach her shield before she bashed the beast with all the strength she could muster. She managed to grip her mace, readying it subtly at her side while her shield still remained raised as the beast lunged back at her. She was still a bit weaker than she anticipated though and the monster's charge forced her to take a knee as she pushed it off her with her shield. She bashed again, sending the vampire staggering back, and readied herself to smash into it the minute it approached her.
She had this under control… the creature would think that she was practically defeated with her kneeling on the ground.
But then it appeared that the creature wasn't the only one thinking that.
Casavir lunged himself at the vampire that was attacking her instantly, his sword finally in his hands. The beast scraped at him, but it stood no chance against the heavily armored man.
She stood up slowly and watched him struggle with the vampire. Well… she did have things under control, but it probably didn't matter. The important thing was that the beast would be dead.
Suddenly something reached out from behind her; sharp claw-like fingernails dug into the skin of her neck as a hand enclosed on it firmly, choking her.
She couldn't breathe!
Her instincts kicked in, but her throat made no sound.
Another hand gripped around her torso, pinning her to the form behind her with powerful arms as she tried to thrash helplessly.
There was a cold breeze, a breath landing on the only part of her neck that was still not covered by the merciless hand or by her braided hair.
It was like two tiny daggers penetrating her skin, a horrible sickening pressure coursing through her neck, moving through her arms, her back and eventually her legs. It was as if something was draining the blood from her arteries. She could feel the creature's lips suckling at her skin on a familiar spot – the very spot that Bishop so often decorated with his love-bites. This time, these lips… it made her sick to her stomach.
It was taking so long, each moment felt longer than the last, each second was making her weaker and weaker.
Her knees buckled, she couldn't move any longer.
There was no strength left in her.
…
Casavir felt so weak from that vile spell.
The rule was to never let them cast magic. They had their prime instinct – when you took them by surprise, the first instinct was to bare their fangs and scrap. It was always key to kill them fast and never let them get the jump on you.
They were too cunning to be left to their planning.
He should have been more vigilant, he let himself be distracted.
He saw her from the corner of his eye as he swung his sword in a wide radius, but he missed hitting the vampire that was concentrating on him by a hair's breadth.
Then she fell on her knees.
Was she wounded?!
This was his fault, he should have been vigilant. This was why he had to be wary of distractions.
Especially distractions like her. How did she manage to consume all his attention so easily?
He needed to help her instantly.
He lunged at the beast attacking her, eager to keep it away from her. He stood in front of her protectively, his sword ready.
It would not get through him.
It would not get to hurt her.
The beast charged him, trying to topple him, scape at him. But it was no use, he barely needed to do anything. His armor was doing most of the work for him. He shoved the creature away and swung his sword powerfully, cleaving the vampire's disturbingly disfigured head right off.
Abominations like that deserved nothing less.
He let out a relieved sigh and turned to check on her, but then his blood turned cold.
The other vampire! He just… forgot… he ignored it completely!
What was wrong with him?!
The beast clutched her in a tight twisted embrace. One of its hands was squeezing her neck and forcing her head back as it sucked on the side of it. Trickles of blood were flowing down her pristine skin, disappearing into the underchain below her neck. Its other hand was holding her tightly across her arms and torso, pressing her to the creature's form.
Her face was so much paler than before, ashy, devoid of the vibrant color of her olive skin. Her eyelids were fluttering weakly, her knees buckling.
The beast noticed him and it let her drop heavily on the ground as her armor clanked against the stones below. Its teeth were dripping with her blood. At least it looked like it… he couldn't be sure. He felt like he was literally seeing red.
He didn't even register how he disposed of it.
The next thing he knew, he was kneeling by her, clutching her lifeless form in his arms as he willed his magic to finally work. The vampire was cut into two pieces a stone's throw away.
It was no use… he was still under the effect of that horrid spell.
This was all his fault.
He made so many mistakes…
He had to focus, to collect himself. Despairing was not helpful, he already placed her in harm's way due to his… due to…
He needed to focus…
He couldn't admit it to himself, but deep down, he knew.
It was so painfully obvious now. He lunged at the creature because the idea of her wounded there under his watch was unbearable. The idea of someone being hurt on his watch… especially some he respected. Someone he even… cared for…
Unpleasant words rang in his head.
Bishop was right.
His vows, his focus, his vigilance, it was all threatened when she was around…
His hands lit up at last and his fast heartbeat steadied very slowly. He couldn't allow this. He had to put aside his emotions, his… affections. They have always been his downfall. They have always threatened to lead him astray. But he could not allow it. He never has and he would not now.
She needed his help.