Serious Words For Sirius
The Quidditch League Competition
Title: Sirius Words For Sirius
Team: Ballycastle Bats
Position: Chaser Two
Prompt: Character Pairing Chain…
Extra Prompts: (Trait): Angry; (Emotion): Guilt
Word Count: 2,060
Narcissa Black strode through the corridors of Hogwarts. Her face bore a scowl, her eyes were filled with indignation. Young though she was, other students (and even a couple of teachers) moved aside as she passed with the fury of a storm. Some stared after her as she swept by them. It was very unusual for Narcissa to be so angry, yet now the rage was rolling off her in waves, sending chills down the spines of several people she passed.
No, her professors and fellow students were used to anger coming from her oldest sister Bellatrix, or her cousin Sirius. Not little Narcissa, the Sweetheart of Slytherin, the Pureblood Princess. She was usually the calmest of the five members of the Black family that were either currently at or just graduated from Hogwarts. Aloof, calm, cool, arrogant…those were the terms most often associated with Narcissa Black. Not angry. Or more specifically in this instant, enraged. She was usually so composed, so prim and proper.
But not today.
She stormed all the way from her last class of the day down to the dungeons, not saying a word even to her friends. Students from every house, who noticed the storm of her passage, whispered to one another, agreeing that they were happy her rage was not directed toward them, and feeling pity for whomever that rage was about to fall on.
Reaching her room, she tore her robes off and tossed them on the bed before changing out of her school uniform and into more comfortable, and very expensive, clothes. Then she put her robes back on and stormed out of her room, and all the way out the front door of the school. Exiting onto the grounds she sat down on the bench furthest from the door, fixed her glare on the entryway, and waited.
Narcissa knew that the boys would be out onto the grounds very soon. Besides the fact that it was their normal routine to run off into the grounds after classes, today she had overheard them, so she was doubly assured that they would be out any minute. Narcissa only hoped she hadn't somehow missed them. She was in no mood to go chasing after her idiotic cousin all over the Hogwarts grounds.
Ordinarily she wouldn't even pay her cousin and his ridiculous friends any mind. For the most part this was due to his friends being blood traitors and fools; but also because Sirius was now regarded as a blood traitor himself, and had been booted from the family. Yet after her last class, she was too furious to ignore him.
Blood traitor or not, I won't let him get away with treating his little brother that way! Her fury had not abated at all. If anything it was growing in strength, furthering her resolve to break her family's rules and talk to her cousin. Narcissa reckoned she wouldn't get in too much trouble if her parents discovered she had talked to Sirius, since it was not going to be a friendly conversation at all. She knew her mother wouldn't care; it was her father she worried about.
After a quarter hour, the so-called Marauders hadn't appeared, and Narcissa was beginning to think she had missed them. The entrance was filled with students coming and going, and once again Narcissa hoped she hadn't somehow missed the idiots. Seven minutes later they still had not appeared, and Narcissa was just standing to give up and go back inside, when her cousin and his idiotic friends finally made their appearance.
"SIRIUS ORION BLACK!" She yelled, causing dozens of heads to turn in her direction. She might have been embarrassed if the situation were normal. But Narcissa's anger had taken control of her mind to such an extent that she didn't even care. As before, students parted before her as she stormed up to the so-called Marauders (What a stupid name!), stopping right in front of her estranged cousin. "I need to talk to you!"
The four boys were frozen in place for a moment, ridiculous looks of incredulity frozen on their faces. Pettigrew gulped and hid behind Lupin, Potter's face turned belligerent, whilst Sirius just stared at her in surprise.
"Beat it, Black!" Potter blustered, moving to stand beside Sirius and jabbing his finger at Narcissa. "You and your entire family kicked Sirius out and disowned him, so you gave up the right to demand anything out of Sirius!"
"Shove it, Potter," Narcissa replied, her eyes never leaving the eyes of her cousin. "This is none of your concern. It's Black family business."
As Potter opened his mouth to say something else, Narcissa grabbed a still somewhat stunned Sirius by the arm and dragged him off, with a muttered, "Come over here."
A twinge of indignation surged through Sirius as he was led off, and he thought about yanking his arm out of his cousin's grasp. But so angry was she that Sirius could feel it emanating off of her in waves, and decided to see what had triggered her so.
Stopping once they had turned a corner on the path out to the grounds, Narcissa whirled to face Sirius, letting go of his arm. "What in Merlin's name is wrong with you?!" she hissed through clenched teeth. How dare you torment your brother! Your own little brother, Sirius! You of all people should understand what that boy is going through! He needs your love and your support, not torment! Not from his own brother! Don't you think he goes through enough of that at home? You should be his safe place, not his personal bully!"
Sirius was struck dumb. Many thoughts were flying around in his mind that he wanted to say: he wanted to say that his family had disowned him, that they had treated him abysmally when he was growing up, that he was sick of their support of the Dark Lord. But he was too dumbfounded by Narcissa's anger as she continued to berate him.
"I get that you don't agree with how we were raised, I get that you don't agree with the beliefs of our family, I get that you want to pursue your own course in life. I get all that! But Sirius, there are better ways of trying to effect change than hate. Do you honestly think that I agree with everything our family espouses? Well, I do not! But I am not turning against them, I am not letting my hate turn me into the same thing that they are! You and your friends' hypocrisy sickens me! Do you not see yourself? You are all the things you say you hate in us, and accuse us of being. But because you're on the 'right side', you feel justified in your actions! And tormenting your own brother? If you hate your family so much, just ignore him! Do you think your pranks and insults and bullying are going to win him over? Do you think they're going to get him to change?"
Narcissa grabbed him by the shoulders as her voice became more harsh. "You of all people know what he goes through at home, from your mother and father. He shouldn't have to put up with all that here at Hogwarts from you and your friends! This should be a refuge for him, an escape from what he goes through at home! But no, you have to make Hogwarts hell for him as well!"
Sirius felt an uncommon feeling wash over him. Guilt. It was guilt. Most of the time he felt thoroughly justified in his actions because of all the pain inflicted on him growing up. His only overriding feeling toward his family was hate. But now, having Narcissa berate him like this, he felt guilty. And he felt tears start to build up in the corners of his eyes.
Narcissa dropped her hands from his shoulders, and she covered her face with her hands. Sirius remained silent despite all the things he wanted to say. But his mind could still not form a coherent response to Narcissa's words. So he waited for her to speak again.
"Even by talking to you I've broken my father's command of having nothing to do with you. But Siri, I can't just sit by and let you torment your little brother."
Sirius eyebrows shot up at his cousin's use of the familiar term "Siri". None of his family had called him that in years.
She lowered her hands and looked him in the eyes. "I know you hate me, and think I'm just like the rest. But promise me one thing…just one. Stop tormenting Regulus. You make him miserable, Sirius! He needs you; he needs his brother, not a bully. If you want to get back at your parents, then do it by helping Regulus escape their clutches the way you did, not by pushing him away and straight into their arms."
"Whether you believe me or not, Sirius, I am doing what I can to effect change from the inside of the family. Look at me, Siri—I'm walking right into the lion's den with my eyes wide open. Marrying Lucius is not my first choice. But I believe I can do more from inside the inner circle than I could otherwise."
Narcissa gave her cousin a small smirk. "Don't get excited thinking I'm coming over to the lightside. I don't disagree with everything the family stands for. But I am doing what I can to mitigate certain things."
She placed a gentle hand on his arm. "Please, for your own sake if nothing else, let go of your hate. All it will do is consume you! And for Merlin's sake, stand up for Reg."
Glancing around and making certain no one was in sight, she gave Sirius a quick hug. "If you ever need anything," she murmured, "don't be afraid to contact me. Merlin only knows what I'll be able to do for you, but whatever I can do I will…as long as it doesn't involve betraying our family. Bye, Siri." And with that she turned and swept back toward the school. James and the others found him not long after, still standing in the same spot where Narcissa had berated him, a look of deep concentration on his face.
"You all right, Pads?" James asked, placing a hand on Sirius' shoulder. "We saw Narcissa heading back into the school alone and were worried she'd hexed you or something when we didn't see you with her."
Sirius stared blankly at James for a moment before a look of resolve covered his face. "We're not messing with Reg anymore, Prongs."
All three of his best friends gaped at him in shock. "But...but why"? Spluttered James. "What in Merlin's name did Narcissa do to you that made you change your mind about your brother?"
"What about Snivellus?" Peter squeaked.
Sirius snorted. "I don't give a fig about Snivellus. But Reg is off the table."
"But…but…"James spluttered again.
Sirius directed a glare at his friend, the look indicating he would accept no exceptions. "I mean it, Prongs. From now on, we leave Reg alone. And Narcissa did nothing but talk."
"Must have been some talk," murmured Remus as he continued staring at Sirius.
Sirius let out a deep sigh. Narcissa's words had cut him deeply, and he had a lot to think over. But he felt lighter of heart than he had in years. Because she had been right about at least one thing: Regulus did indeed face hell at home, and Sirius still felt the guilt twinging in him as he realized he truly had treated his brother abysmally. He had escaped and given no thought at all to his poor brother he'd left behind.
And the thought was like a punch in his gut.
With another sigh, he said, "Come on, lads. Let's go relax a bit before dinner." Turning, he led the way out to the Black Lake. Glancing back at the school, he sent a silent prayer to Merlin that Narcissa would be able to effect the change she hoped to bring to her family. To their family.
And that was the first time Sirius Black had thought of the family he had turned his back on with pity instead of bitterness.