For the past four months, Ruby had been moonlighting at the pharmacy, helping out Sneezy, while he recovered from falling down the stairs, after an intense bout of sneezes threw him down the stairs. The first couple of weeks had been a brief flit of excitement, a learning experience that had rushed by so fast, she missed the daunting moments, when she didn't know where the pile cream or other embarrassing items were located. At least in those early days, the Saturday evening shift would fly by with the unusual requests and the young men, and some women, popping in to buy protection, either on their way out for the night or on their way home with a date. A suggestive wink here, an embarrassed blush there, had made the evening stream roll by until it was time to lock up.
These long drawn out Saturday evenings, gave way to hours of deep contemplation as she sat on a stool, elbow propped on the display behind her, staring out the window at the empty parking lot. Ruby had learnt, from her days at Granny's, that there were three different types of customers.
First, you had your neat freaks. These were the ones, who picked a table, checking underneath the table was clean before they sat down. Then they would rearrange the items on the table, checking for missed crumbs and bits of food hidden behind the condiments. Some of them may even carry wet wipes, but these tended to be more women than men, and would wipe down the table, not satisfied it had been cleaned. Some would complain, if their food encroached onto the other items on their plate. Looked at their server with suspicion, imagining they were as dirty as the table. They would quickly, maybe comment about the unseen cleanliness and leave, coming back the same time next week, sitting in the same spot, doing the same routine all over again. These types of customers always made Ruby smirk and put a rod up Granny's back.
Second, you had your indifferent customers. Those who couldn't care, what was underneath their table or hidden behind the condiments and napkin depositor. These were the customers, who already had an idea of what they wanted, ordered their food, didn't complain. They were the type that nosey at everyone and everything, happy just to be there and being served on, instead of having to cook and wash the dishes afterwards. Ruby and Granny agreed, they were the favourites – The easily pleased.
Then, lastly, was the most appalling customers, who always received a disgusted grunt, when the waitresses recognised them. These were the sort of customers, who didn't care about their appearance, wore t-shirts with food and various other stains. Had no clue about manners – wiping their noses on their sleeves, coughed without covering their mouths – the kind who cared only about themselves. It wouldn't matter to them, if there was dirt and uneaten food under the table, because they were the ones that created it. The ones, who ate without any regard for anyone else, getting sauce and bits of food over the table, and down themselves, chewing with an open mouth, showing the world what they were eating. These were the customers, Ruby avoided and Granny took unbridged with, shooting them glares and throwing snide comments at them. Annoyingly, these were the customers, who came in daily, treating the diner like it was their home.
Working in the pharmacy, Ruby had found there was a similar pattern, especially with the men. It had been an eye opener, when she had begun to note their behaviour around certain times of the month. Again, there were three types of men at these times of the month.
There was the sneaky, secretive man. He would enter the store, look around for other occupants, give an awkward smile to her at the counter, a hopeless attempt to appear indifferent, before they wandered to the back of the store. They would spend the most time perusing the shelves, picking up items to study them, spending more time glancing round than actually looking at the item, then would return it to the shelf. Secretly, Ruby would watch them, through the security monitor, as they worked their way around the store until they got to the feminine items.
To the untrained clerk, it would appear the man was stealing something as they stuffed the item in question inside of their jacket. At a quicker pace, they would swagger back to the front of the store, nosing at items uninterested. It was when they got to the counter, their behaviour became most bizarre. The item, hidden inside of their jacket, would be thrown on the counter, a dirty little secret that they couldn't bear to handle.
"Is that all?" She would ask, her lips remaining tight to hide their amused smirk.
The main culprit being this type of customer would be Killian Jones, who would scratch the back of his neck, partially swivelling away on his heels, watching for anyone entering the store. "Yep."
"Nothing else?" Ruby would inquire, doing her best to be the best clerk, serving the needs of her customers.
"Yes." He would nicely snap, flicking his eyeliner gaze at her.
"Eight dollars." She would tell him, smiling a wide toothy smile at him.
The ten-dollar bill would be tossed onto the counter, damp from his sweaty palm, while he snatched the item off the counter, stuffed it deep inside his leather jacket, as he hurried out of the pharmacy. Sometimes, Ruby would wait the door to close, or depending how fast they rushed to the door, she would chuckle at their quickly retreating form.
The second kind of man, was the thoughtful, conscientious man. He would enter much like the first type of man, briefly look around, smile confidently at her as they picked up a basket from the stack by the door. This man would take his time. Much like the first, he would peruse the items for sale, take an item off the shelf, read the packaging and then, he'd either drop it in the basket or put it back on the shelf. He'd mosey around the store, working his way to the feminine items, while also putting other items in the basket, masking his trip to the store with other items. The last item in the basket to go into the basket, would be the actual item, he had been sent to the store to purchase. It would be concealed by the other items, when the basket would be presented onto the counter, a charming smile given to distract the clerk.
"Evening, Ruby." David Nolan, Prince Charming himself, would say, taking out his wallet from his back pocket.
"Charming." Ruby would return his greeting as she began to ring through his items, packing them into a standard brown paper bag. "Popping out for a few things?"
His eyebrows would thrust up his forehead before he caught up with her. "Oh, yes. Snow forgot a few things."
"That was very careless of her." She would comment, waving the item in question at the Prince.
A blush would colour his cheeks. "Yes, well… A lot on her mind with the kids at school."
"I'm sure." She would tell him with a knowing smile.
He would pay, bow his head in thanks and clutch the brown bag of items to his chest, a confident stride carrying him out of the store. 'Mission accomplished' was what his smile stated as he left and climbed into his truck. Ruby would watch him, seeing a good third of the male population of Storybrooke.
The last kind of man, but not at all the least, was probably the rarest breed. These were the ones, who didn't care what others said about them, stuck their middle finger up at the comments and walked with their heads held high. They would come into the store, wouldn't pay her any attention and would head straight for the feminine section. There was a slight variant at this moment: there were those that new exactly where the prefer item was located or those that had to go down the shelving, hand held out, ready to snatch the item from the shelf. On this occasion, it was the previous variant she was dealing with, who was her prime example for this type of man.
Rumplestiltskin would grab two of the item, stuffing the packages under his arm, while he crossed the back of the shop to the sweet aisle. He still wouldn't look at her, wouldn't either acknowledge her existence, as he stopped in front of the chocolate and grabbed three bars of his wife's favourite chocolate. From there, he would go back across the back of the store, grab a large bag of chips, her favourite flavour, wedging that under his arm too, as he headed to the alcohol aisle. There would be some loud chinking, then he would appear at the end of the aisle, carrying two bottles of her favourite wine in one hand.
These items would be dumped onto the counter as he said. "Bottle of Jameson's as well."
"Anything else?" She would ask him, knowing better than to tease him.
"No, thank you, dearie." Rumple would tell her, taking out the money clip from his trouser pocket.
Ringing through the items, Ruby asked. "Do you want a bag, Gold?"
"No need." He would say, picking up the items as she rung them in, wedging them under his left arm.
"Seventy-four, eighty-six." She would tell him, moving the items closer to him as he tossed a hundred-dollar bill down.
"Keep it." He would inform her, pocketing the bars of chocolate before picking up the item(s) he had come for originally.
On this one occasion, Leroy had entered, nearly bumping into Rumple as he was about to push the door open. They'd danced around each other, until Rumple's back was to the glass door and Leroy was in the store.
Leroy had chuckled. "Who would've imagine the Dark One could be so whipped."
Rumple's eyebrows pushed together with the end of his right eyebrow cocking up. "If by that, you mean that I take my wife's needs seriously, then yes, I am."
"Wouldn't catch me buying those… Things." Leroy had muttered, throwing a dismissive hand at the items in Rumple's hand.
It was then, Ruby's eyes had widened at Rumple hitting Leroy with said items in the forehead. "There is nothing wrong with buying tampons or pads for my wife!"
"Sure there isn't." Leroy had chuckled, rolling his eyes.
Rumple had smacked the items into Leroy's face, ending Leroy's amusement. "At least, I'm going home to cuddle with my wife, watch some stupid movie she's watched a million times, while she eats as much junk food as she likes."
With that said, Rumple had backed through the glass doors, using his back to open the door, and had left without saying anything else to Leroy. The dwarf had stood lost, gaping after Rumple, shocked by the insinuation the Dark One had made. Ruby had smirked at the exchange, retaking her seat on the stool, casting her gaze through the window, to see Rumple get into his car and drive away without a care. He didn't care what others thought of him, figuratively stuck his middle finger up at Leroy and held his head up high, only caring what his wife would say, when he came home with her favourite chocolate, chips and wine, and of course, the item he had been sent out to buy for her.