Shepard knew her crew, there was no denying that. Though really, going on a suicide mission together – knowingly – will do that, if the leader is the right sort of person. The Normandy was full to bursting now with newcomers, whether requested or not. Regardless of if they were there to man a post on the ship, had carried over from the SR-1 or because Shepard chose to pick them up after reviewing their dossier before the war really started, she treated them all the same.
Everyone was greeted by name, whether it was lunch in the mess or in the small hours of the night-cycle. In fact, she made a habit of coming out to visit those on the graveyard shift at least every week. She said if they had to be up running ship maintenance protocols and detail cleaning the Hammerhead while everyone else caught some shut-eye, then she should at least be there to appreciate it once in a while. Her crew admired her for her attentiveness; it inspired a deep personal loyalty that only come with the knowledge that your work, no matter however seemingly trivial, was valued.
Shepard was more laid back than many Alliance officers. Joking with her crew was second nature and helped to lighten the mood during difficult times by creating a camaraderie that was founded on implicit, unwavering support.
While she made every one of her crew feel seen and appreciated, there was no doubting that she had a special bond with those she took on ground missions. To rely on someone to watch your back when bullets were flying was a whole other level of trust, and each of the squad had proved themselves in their own personal baptism of fire. It became an easy, unspoken partnership when they worked together as a trio, no matter who was selected to join her. So much so that she knew how each of them liked to prepare for a mission.
Soldiers are notorious for being just a little superstitious, and who can really blame them for trying to get a little extra karma on their side before putting their lives on the line. Shepard probably had her own private habits that helped her feel secure, but as Commander, she chose not to share them with her crew. Who wants to know that their boss has to wear a lucky pair of threadbare socks to feel like they'll make it through a firefight… doesn't exactly inspire confidence.
Even so, she did know how each of her crew liked to prepare, even if they did it unconsciously. For each ground mission, she made a point of checking in with them before getting into the shuttle, in whatever way that squad member would respond to best. A ritual that helped everyone feel in sync together, before plunging into the fray.
Some were subtle. Samara was so put together, ever the Justicar with all her infinite, unflappable calmness, that she and Shepard merely exchanged enigmatic smiles before leaving the Normandy. Liara appreciated the grounding of touch, and often Shepard would make it as simple as laying a gentle hand on her arm as they chatted about something inane. That moment of Shepard's piercing green eyes and her undivided attention for a second was enough. A quiet prayer had been shared with Thane when he was still with them, asking forgiveness for deeds done, and deeds to come. Miranda didn't much go in for sentimentality, and would leave it at a stiff nod.
Some were more unique. Shepard and Ashley always did some sort of complicated handshake they admitted they had both learned as Alliance recruits during the first week of hazing, where the new Privates are initiated into military life. The others found stories of those times frankly horrifying, but Shepard and Ashley seemed to remember them fondly. Tali liked to engulf Shepard in a hug, ever the innocent Quarian who was immeasurably far from home, sailing away in the stars. Kasumi would disappear into the mirage of her tactical cloak until Shepard, seemingly oblivious, snatched her out of thin air and shorted it out with a charge from her omnitool. Kasumi had never made it past her yet. Mordin had taught Shepard a salarian greeting, one fist crossed against the chest, which salarians preferred to reduce physical contact with others. Zaeed would swear and grumble about what he considered her Achilles' heel, her instinct to do right by everyone.
Wrex was forever creating havoc by doing a colossal headbutt with Shepard with an almighty crash, whose skull was thankfully temporarily shielded by a biotic barrier she conjured to prevent brain damage. Jack would simply pack all of her pent up energy in one, insane punch aimed directly at Shepard's jaw and shout a war-cry as all the energy dissipated against Shepard's barrier. More than once, one of them had had to do an emergency run to the Medbay to set a broken bone, barrier or no.
Vega did his level best to get Shepard to blush with the world's worst dirty jokes and innuendo, complete with bad eyebrow wiggling. Though after six months of house arrest together, she had built up a sizeable tolerance for his bluster and bullshit. More often than not, her understated retort accompanied with sly half smile had him ducking to hide a blush. Edi liked to tell Shepard about the new element of human behaviour she had learned about, while Legion would explain what the processes that made up the unit's animating program were up to at the moment.
Sometimes, the others would see her talking to Garrus as they stepped out of the elevator together, before they gently bumped helmets and entered the hangar. He came on a lot of those missions, to the slight chagrin of some of the others who would have preferred to spend more time in the field. Though when they saw Shepard and Garrus' easy synchrony on the battlefield, it was hard to argue with the choice. They seemed to anticipate each others moves without speech, to the point where sometimes Vega had to check whether his comm was working or not. Garrus would stay in cover further back in the field, but not so distant that he was out of reach if things went sideways. He would pick off unsuspecting enemies hoping to get a quick snapshot of the battlefield while poking their heads into the open, while she would slip silently up to those closer in and take them out like a ghost. They were often silent on the way back from missions too, even the bad ones. Though they tended to stick a little closer together after things had gotten rough.
Regardless, Shepard took a moment with each of her ground squad each and every time they left the Normandy to respect the little idiosyncrasies each had to prepare for a mission. She never missed them, not once.
It seemed strange that Shepard didn't have her own ritual before a battle, even when they were heading towards the Omega-4 relay, and beyond to Mars, Menae, Tuchanka. Maybe she had moved past that need in her life to have little habits that made her feel safe before she risked her life. She was a Commander after all.
What the squad didn't know, what they would never know, were the quiet moments she spent with Garrus on the elevator down. Both fully kitted with armour, helmets under their arms. Garrus' blue suit still bore the scars of the rocket, the cowl piece covered in scratches and pockmarked with chips… where there weren't entire chunks missing. Despite Shepard's insistence, he still preferred to patch it rather than replace it. Shepard had her favoured N7 suit that felt like a second skin now. It wasn't new by any stretch of the imagination, it had scuffs, small burns and the impacts of bullets scattered over its surface. But the sheen on the remaining untouched surface showed how much she cared for it, while the scars showed her familiarity with the kind of fighting that doesn't end in a handshake.
In those quiet moments they would stand close to each other, sometimes close enough to catch a brief trace of the others' scent on the air. Their fingers might brush together momentarily, a small smile exchanged. They didn't really need to say much anymore. It was an easy, companionable silence of two people who knew each other intimately. And, just before they reached the hangar level, their foreheads would touch. They would take a breath together, take strength from each other. A silent promise, that they would return together.