Author's Note:

Welcome! This will be a multi-chapter Reylo story that I will try to update at least once a week.

Most of the story has already been planned out for about 30-35 chapters with potential sequels in the works.

Feedback and constructive criticism is appreciated throughout the story, however, hate is not.

Sincerely,

WriterofFiction21

--

I loved my Jedi training with Leia and it was not because I could expend my extra energy. However, it was more so that I could escape the looks of disappoint and contempt that haunted me across the base.

I would like to think that the looks were unfair, however, I knew they were fair after what I did, joining Kylo Ren.

It had been a moment of weakness. I had just been feeling so broken and invisible, then Kylo Ren had been their holding out his hand offering to make me visible. His eyes telling me that I mattered to him. Not only that though, I had sworn that I had seen Ben's soul breaking through the mask of Kylo Ren and just like that I gave into the feelings by taking his hand.

That is what they thought, I muttered silently.

Little did they know how far my sins ran, that shortly after the Battle of Crait the two of them began a relationship, in secret of course. It was the happiest two weeks of my life. It had been the only time in my life that I hadn't feel empty or broken, like I had found the missing piece.

However, I found that moment of happiness was short lived.

A little while ago...

[I woke up one morning with him sleeping next to me. I watched his chest rise and fall to the rhythm of his breath as I always did. He looked so innocent when he slept and looking at him not you won't guess that he was one of the most feared men in the galaxy. Feared in the galaxy. That is when the pit in her stomach formed, it appeared every morning but she was so happy so she ignored it.

Although, today was different. Today she knew what she had to do. She had to walk away from him.

Even though I knew that I loved him, however, I loved the man hidden away under the mask of Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, and it broke my heart to leave him but I knew that right now I was lying next to Kylo Ren. Therefore, we had remain apart for the safety of the force as I can't be drawn to the dark side too. If I succumbed to the darkness as Ben did the galaxy will be destroyed so I had not choice but to wait for Ben's return.

So, before I could change my mind I gathered up the two most important items that I owned for the bedside table which was my staff and Luke's lightsaber. I headed towards the door without daring to look back because I knew if I did I would never I have the strength to turn back around to continue walking...

,and I left without saying a word.]

It had been almost two months since that day. The worst day of my life.

Despite all of the anger and disappointment I had received after I returned and still continues to receive, especially from Finn and Poe. I knew that I didn't regret any of the time I had spent with him, my only regret is that I couldn't bring Ben back with me.

"Rey? Rey?"

I turned to face the origin of the voice, I saw an older women standing out from the brushes and trees around her. From a glance you would think that she had lived an easy life, but as you look closer you notice the scars of her history tell you otherwise. Her hair is messy between the shades with the grey strands outshining everything and the lines that spread across her face telling the story of her age. But what gives it away is her facial expression. The cracks in the mask. The mask of the Princess and a daughter. Instead, you see a women ravaged by a lifetime of violence that has taken the people closest to her one by one, that has torn her family in two and destroyed her home. It is the look of exhaustion but having no choice to carry on. It is the look of a General. It is the look of Leia.

"Huh? What did you say?"

It was the only thing that came to my mind, I looked up at the General who I had come to see as more like a mother figure. Not that I knew what a mother was, having never had one myself. I had often heard Poe trading stories with Leia about his mother and their connection. I have often thought about how nice it would have been to have had that mother-child relationship, but the longing in my being constantly reminds that a true mother-child relationship is beyond me.

"I said, are you alright today Rey? You look a bit unwell." Leia repeated without a frustration in her voice, unlike sometimes with Poe who gets frustrated with her daydreams regularly. Leia has a sense of understanding for her predicament that the others didn't, or perhaps she was just biased because it involved her son.

"Oh. Sorry, Master. I have just been feeling a bit tired over the last little while, that's all."

Not only had I been feeling quite tired but I had also been frequently light headed and nausea. However, I was pretty sure that this is just from all of the training I had been doing taking a physical toll on my body. Or it was the repercussions all of the crying that I had done in secret when no one was around. I have often found myself hidden in some corner in an abandoned area of their current base, I was unsure why I was crying so much though. In fact, I should be happy that I had returned to the place where I belonged but I couldn't help feeling like that I had already left my true home.

Leia already sensing that there was more troubling me than just exhaustion came closer to me with the ground marking every step that she took with crushed leaves and broken branches. Leia also walked with that sense of confidence and wisdom as she often did. Once Leia reached me she cupped her cheek to comfort her before she spoke.

"You look more than a little unwell, why don't you go back to your room and rest. We can continue the training tomorrow."

I was actually caught off guard by this statement. Their training had never been cancelled, not even for a thunderstorm. Yet, this was probably more my insistence than Leia's. I contemplating dismissing the words but then registered the concerned look on Leia's face and realised that I should heed my Master's suggestion.

"Ok. Thank you, Master." I spoke in a soft voice of acceptance while bending down to give Leia an embrace. Nothing else need to be said, everything that had been bothering me was silently spoken between them in the embrace. To this day cannot figure out if that level of connection comes from Leia's strong connection to the force or amazing ability to read the emotions of anyone close to her.

--

I hated the walk across camp as that is when I felt the emotions most prominently while they pierced through me with laser intensity. So I did what I usually do, I pay more attention to my thoughts than my surroundings. This had been habit I had developed not long after I arrived back on the base when the emotions were too much. I would walk for hours, sometimes well beyond where I need to go just thinking about anything, usually it involved Be-

"Oww!!" Was the only thing I heard, I couldn't make out the rest of the sentence although given past experience there was probably some frustrating adjectives in there. Although, by the time I had acknowledged by surroundings again she was collecting herself from the ground.

Yet, I couldn't help but noticed that they were about the height expect that the girl had a very slim figure, looking no older than early twenties. Her curly black hair flowed delicately to elbow length which looked like it has just escaped the messy bun that had previously held it captivate. Also, part of her hair it had flown directly over her face highlighting her jaw. It had been more defined than I had anticipated for someone of her figure, but it didn't tarnish her delicate appearance at all. Yet, her eyes told a different story, on the surface they were beautifully soft brown eyes that complemented her face perfectly, but when I looked closer I noticed that there was a great amount of experience and more so tragedy hidden behind the eyes of so young.

"I am so sorry. I was completely off in a world of my own and didn't see you there." I rambled on, perhaps more than I needed to, but I already felt so self conscious because I know the opinion that people already had of me.

"Don't worry about it! You were thinking about the war right?" She cheerfully with a look of inquisition forming, only to have it replaced with intense focus on her hands as she dusted off the remaining dirt. My demeanour saddened, and my muscles tightened. 'If only she wish she was thinking about the war in the way this girl that meant it.' I contemplated which only added to my nervousness.

Noticing that the girl was still bent over I crouched down and noticed that she was collecting old worn down mechanical parts, she was scrunching face examining each one, checking to see if there was any major damage. My glance became consisting more frazzled every time she stop to examine the same spot for a third time, darting to different spots on the ground. She must have picked up on my nervous body language because before I could even register she had stop examining the parts and placed a comforting hand on my arm. 'Just like Leia does', noting that she had also relaxed her face to counteract my nervous energy as she spoke.

"I mean it gets to everyone, even a Jedi like yourself. Violence is hard for everyone in our galaxy which is what makes our fight against the First Order so important." She paused as if that was all she had to say but then her voice dropped down to a whisper. "We fight to protect those how are helpless to protect themselves." She had spoken as if whole world was on her shoulders, her voice choked and a lone glistened under eye before she quickly wiped it away with a forced smile.

Seeing her reaction only made me feel worse. I know she was only trying to make me feel better but seeing how impacted she had been this war, only made my heart ache even more. As I feel responsible somehow, I was suppose to be their hope, to defeat the First Order and not only did I fail to do so but I also joined them.

Her facial expression changed when I didn't give an immediate answer, her eyes softened and smile diminished. She placed her remaining hand on my other shoulder, helping me to my feet. Although, she didn't release her arms from my shoulders, instead she just stood there rubbed her hands up and down my arms in an effort of soothe me. Yet, I noticed that her smile never returned, but rather there were tears forming in her eyes that she was desperately trying to hold back.

I admired her resolve to remain strong and to not let the pain break her. However, I couldn't help but feel a bit jealous this, every time she thought of how much she missed Ben or when she became overwhelmed with the negativity of others she would feel a small tear fall from her eye.

While we were standing in each others comfort trying to bury the pain. I notice a nagging feeling rising in my chest, it was the feeling of familiarity, that somehow I had meet her before. I couldn't place why. Her clothes were the traditional Resistance outfit with the light coloured top and brown combat pants paired with black combat boots.

Then I notice the jacket she is wearing and how it reassembles Finn's jacket remarkably closely. Nonetheless, when I focus my eyes I notice that there are in fact some huge differences, for one it was much smaller in size and there were faded symbol on the sleeves near the shoulder that had succumbed to age. Now that I thought about it the colours were the only thing that was the same.

At some point she must have dropped her hands from my arms because now she was holding out her hand to introduce her self.

"My name is Kayla by the way."

I instantly felt and an extra twitch of sadness when she introduced herself, it was a sadness I knew all too well. It was the sadness of not having a family name or anywhere that you felt you belonged.

Knowing the pain that Kayla must be feeling I chose not question the abnormality and took her to introduce myself.

"I am Rey, it is nice to meet you Kayla."

Her eyes instantly widened, "Your Rey?"

I didn't know what to make of this question, more so why she was so pleased because of my name. Her face had totally light up, there was a smile to replace the frown and the tears that were previously forming in her eyes were no where to be seen.

"Yes, I am. Why?" I answered hesitantly with more questions springing into my head every second.

However, before she could answer my question someone called out her name causing her to immediately let go of my hand and snap to attention.

"Kayla! Where are the capacitors? These ships are not going to fix themselves." The voice was one of urgency and impatience, it was Poe.

"Coming!"

Kayla had already reached down to pick all of capacitors that were still lying on the ground. "I am so sorry. He is like this with everyone, always everything as if it needed to be done five minutes ago."

That's Poe, always rushing to save the day.

"Anyway, I better go. It was nice to meet you, Rey." Waving to her as she raced off with her feet striding as far as they could carry her.

She needs to slow down, I thought, Poe is actually a big softie on the inside and would never actually do anything to her, expect maybe the silent treatment.

I didn't bother waving to Kayla as she was already lost in the distance with the capacitors in hand by the time I raised my hand.

Yet, as I was watching her, still completely puzzled, I overhear a particular conversation that peaked my interest.

"-symptoms persisted for weeks, I was completely run down, I constantly felt like I was going to faint and I skipped meals from the nausea. But I wouldn't trade my son for anything." One of the resistance woman recited, more so with annoyance rather than anything else.

That sounds exactly like me. I proceeded to sit on a nearby rock and fiddled with my lightsaber as to not draw attention to myself. I had wanted to get to the bottom of my exhaustion for weeks now but I never knew cause and now these women sound like they had the had and there was no way I was going to pass this opportunity.

"Yeah, I also had the symptoms but I didn't want anyone to know about it so I snuck into medical bay after everyone was asleep and got a secret examination." She paused before continuing, crafting her sentence meticulously before speaking. After a few seconds of contemplation she carried on. "I was so sacred. I didn't know what I was going to do next but it turned out my pregnancy was the best thing that ever happened to me. I wouldn't trade my child for anything."

SYMPTOMS. PREGNANCY. CHILD.

These three things raced around her head. I can't be pregnant. I mean I could but I can't. There must be something else. There had to be. Either way I needed to find out tonight, regardless of what I fear the answer might be.

--

Just like the other woman had done, I snuck into the medical bay after everyone had gone to sleep. The medical bay actually looked quite desolate without its regular flurry of activity, It was actually quite a creepy when there is no one around expect the droids.

Taking no time investigate the room further, she quickly tiptoed to the med droid at the back of the bay. Rey knows that it doesn't matter which droid she uses, however, there is just something psychologically comforting about having a couple of extra to hide in case someone comes.

After reaching the droid, she immediately pulled the panel off the back of its head to get to the wiring. All of all her scavenging days are paying off as the parts may be placed differently but all droid memory chips look the same.

It didn't take Rey long to find and disable the memory chip while leaving the programming intact. She stopped and sat in the silence for a moment, knowing that what she was about to do next could potentially alter the course of her life. Her breathing had increased, her chest has tightened and I slowly outstretched my hands which we're now shaking to power of the droid.

It immediately lifted up its head, however, took a minute before it actually spoke.

"Hello, how may I be of assistant?" The droid spoke in an automated voice that completely void of any emotion which actually unnerved me even further.

"Umm...hi. I was wondering if you could me an examination and check for an...internal physical abnormalities." I muttered as I was completely clueless as to what say to the droid so therefore that immediately devoted me of any confidence that might of remained.

"Ok, lets begin."

The droid began to do several different types basic of medical exams to me. I didn't understand anything the droid was doing so she just does she is told. This is one of the downsides of growing up in a desolate desert, there was no one around to teach you these types of things.

"Ok. I have completed the assessment of your body and found something-" The droid paused before continuing almost as if it was waiting for my permission to reveal the results. I couldn't wait any longer. I waved my hands up in frustration.

"Well...what is it then?" There was almost a hint of fear in the droid, however, she knew that she was most likely just imagining this as I knew after many years of scavenging that the one thing that droid didn't have were emotions.

"You are pregnant, about two months."

I was shocked by the droids words.

"Would you like-"

I switched off the medical droid before it could say anymore.

My entire world just shattered, I could barely comprehend what had been said to me. I had already known that it was a possibly but I never actually thought it would happen. Me a mother. The thoughts were spinning around my head all blurry and jumbled, but there was one thought as stood out from the rest.

What am I going to tell Leia?!

I knew that I would have to tell her eventually, after all she is the child's grandmother. However, part of her secretly hoped that Leia already knew so that I wouldn't have to say the words out loud. Yet, her had drifted to her abdomen where the life growing inside of her and suddenly an overwhelming urge came over me to protect the child at all costs. And while I trust Leia wholeheartedly, she has a strong connection to her son, the child's father and there was a possibly that he could find out through that connection. So for my child's safety I decided that I can't tell Leia until Ben had returned as it is too dangerous if he knew, so therefor he can't.

--