Ahoy taters if you've read my story otaku unlimited then you should know that I've done a self insert fic before!

This'll be my second self insert fic! One where I am reincarnated into the My hero academia universe!

Without further ado! Let's begin!

Hello you all know me as The Punishment hero: Pigeon man, if you have found this congratulations you are about to learn the secrets to my past.

Oh I know what you're thinking, "What secrets?" And "Its common knowledge that Pigeon man graduated from UA as a member of class 1A" and "We all know that Pigeon man is The twin brother of the hero creati" and "We all know about your polyamorous relationship with Froppy, Earphone Jack and Pinky"

Well I'm here to tell you that there are somethings that you don't know about me, things that will turn your view of the very world you live in upside down.

The world you live in and everyone you know and love?

YOU ALL LIVE IN A FUCKING ANIME!

This whole world is an anime called My Hero academia created by a man named Kohei horikoshi.

I'm not originally from this world, my name was originally Patrick rogan the third and I come from an alternate world- I hesitate to call my original homeworld the real world because I don't want to make the people of this world uncomfortable but I guess I shouldn't bother with the revelation I've already given you.

The truth- it sucks- for you that is.

This world is an anime and I died and got reincarnated as Creati's twin brother.

How did I die?

FLASHBACK

DATE FRIDAY MAY 28TH 2021!

I was a twenty three year old man who hadn't accomplished much in my life, I had two jobs during my first life.

One at a warehouse where I took pictures of shoes and one as a dietary aide at a nursing home, I lost BOTH jobs after a few months.

I lived with my Aunt and uncle and we were currently eating out at my favorite restaraunt in the city, Sakura Japanese buffet.

You see me, a Five foot four overweight redhead with glasses and a blonde mustache who has nothing to live for but anime and Japanese lesbian porn, my god was I the stereotypical weeb.

I was chowing down on my fourth plate from the buffet, which had fried rice, four pieces of sweet and sour chicken covered in sauce, six krab Rangoons, and four pieces of General tsao chicken.

My aunt asked me "You're really enjoying the food here aren't you? I thought you'd be happy to eat at this restaraunt again"

I washed down my food with a big gulp of Dr Pepper and said "Are you kidding? This is my favorite restaraunt and I haven't been able to eat here in a year a whole fucking year because of Covid 19! Being able to eat here again is like escaping hell and having water for the first time in five years!"

My Aunt laughed "That's my nephew"

My Uncle who just finished his third plate said "I'm going to get more of those krab rangoons" before getting up and heading back to the buffet.

I shoveled the fried rice into my mouth like a starving man 'Oh yes yes Japanese food is the BEST! I missed this restaraunt so much!'

"Patrick chew with your mouth closed" chastised my aunt.

Blushing, I attempted to slow down my eating and concentrated on closing my mouth as I swallowed the mix of fried rice and tsao chicken in my talk hole.

I then heard the bell of the restaraunt open and I heard the cashier at the entrance began to say "Table for 6?- Wait you can't open carry guns in"

*BANG BANG BANG*

I covered my ears in pain as it felt like hot knives were being shoved inside my eardrums.

"Gun shots!" I cried out "What the fuck? Why are there gun shots so close by?"

My ringing ears picked up the sound of screaming and I digging my fingers into my ear holes looked up and saw the Buffett's asian staff being gunned down mercilessly by six skin heads covered in KKK/ nazi tattoos.

Whom I assumed to be the leader of the group, a Six foot eleven inch tall man with amber eyes, a shaved ice blonde head and a tattoo of a nazi on his shaved head said

"All you white traitors listen up! We the Aryan brotherhood have taken it upon ourselves to rid our Glorious town of Stuart of the filthy Asians who caused the corona virus outbreak! It's because of these filthy dog eating asians that we had to wear masks and socially distance for an entire year!

Those of our fellow white people who eat shit asian food here won't be killed but you will suffer a beating! As for you filthy asians- you're all gonna die!"

"Not if I have anything to say about it/ Like hell you will racist piece of shit!" Said my aunt and uncle as they withdrew their own concealed carry weapons and fired.

*BANG BANG BANG BANG!*

My aunt and uncle managed to drop two skinheads each before they both had their brains blown out.

"NO! Aunt louanne! Uncle sam!" I cried as I started slipping into a panic attack.

My heart was pounding in my ringing ears, my nails breaking as they dug into the wooden table, tears clouding my vision.

There was only one thing on my mind then, REVENGE.

I grabbed the gun out of my dead aunt's hand but as soon as I raised it.

*BANG BANG BANG!*

I was shot in the chest three times.

It felt like my heart was split in three which was because it probably was, I couldn't breathe as blood flooded my lungs and throat.

*Gasp grrrk uuugh grrk* I went as I slumped to the ground desperately trying to breathe.

'oh god I'm dying and- and I haven't even killed one of those racist bastards! I- I haven't even avenged Aunt louanne and Uncle sam or all the nice employees who work so hard at this restaraunt! This beautiful restraunt now stained red with the blood of my family and it's hardworking employees! No no noooo I will avenge everyone!'

I poured the last of my strength into my right arm which was holding the gun, I aimed at a hazel and green eyed skin head who had stabbed a waitress in the eye with a fork and was now pointing a gun at her head.

I squeezed the trigger and with his brains falling out he fell off her.

The leader who was about to shoot a little japanese girl employee turned and aimed his gun at me "You filthy race trai-"

*BAM BANG BAM!*

"AIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEHHH" squealed the leader as his crotch began squirting a fountain of blood and he fell to the floor shrieking like a toddler high on acid.

I had just shot him in the balls three times, he was surely going to bleed out.

And THAT was the last of my strength, I dropped my gun and coughed up blood "B-*cough cough* burn in hell you sadistic bas-*gurk* tards"

A female employee came to check on me, her cellphone in hand "Sir! Please stay with me I'm calling 911!"

"Hello 911? There's been a shooting at the Sakura Japanese buffet! Several are dead! Six of them being the attackers! Bring paramedics we have a survivor who is fading fast!"

And then darkness closed in and I knew nothing.

Date september 23d 2236

I was suddenly blinded by light.

I reached up to shield my eyes from the bright light.

"Wh-what is-is this Heaven? Am I gonna see Grandma again?" I thought that in my head and tried to say it at the same time however the only sounds that came out of my mouth were "Whee-whee-ee-ee-thii-hoo"

'What the fuck' I thought and shouted or atleast tried to shout at the same time "Whoothoofook" I gurgled.

Around me I could hear people talking in a language I couldn't understand.

As my vision began to clear up, I saw a man who had a green persian cat head clutching the hand of a busty Japanese woman who was laying on a hospital bed screaming in pain, she was wearing a blue hospital gown and had her legs spread out.

The man with the green Persian cat head also had green cat paws for hands and a green persian cat tail.

He said to the woman " Sate, saisho no akachan ga dete imasu Anata wa subarashī shigoto o shite imasu, Mo itsu dake!"

To which the the woman screamed with tears streaming down her face "Mo itsu dake?! Mo itsu dake?!"

She then went off on what I assumed was a rant.

I then realized 'That woman, she is giving birth! And she just gave birth to me previously didn't she? And that language! It sounds like Japanese! Shit I can't understand a word she or anyone in here is saying but I'm obviously a baby now, I mean look at my wimpy baby arms and legs!'

With some effort I turned my head and saw that I was being held in the arms of a nurse.

'Damn! Hubba Hubba the nurse who is holding me is a smoking hot Japanese girl! Now that I think about it everyone in this room with the possible exception of the green cat guy are Japanese aren't they? Did-did I just get reincarnated into Japan?!'

In my past life I was a hardcore Otaku and a Japanophile, I was obsessed with anime and Japanese culture watching anime from One piece to Tokyo ghoul, Attack On Titan, Dragon ball z, Full metal alchemist, Naruto, Dragon ball super, Cells at work, Inuyasha, Bleach, Fairy tail, Pokemon, Digimon, and my favorite My Hero academia.

It was in my opinion that Japanese girls were the epitome of beauty and it was my goal to one day marry a Japanese girl, to be honest I kind of fetishized Japanese girls what with all the lesbian japanese porn I watched.

I always wanted to go to Japan, to me Japan was The Holy land of Anime, it was a sacred land more sacred to me then Jerusalem which is saying something since I was raised Christian.

I felt a large grin break out on my baby face and I began to laugh like a mad man or I would have laughed like a mad man if I was an adult, since I was a baby my laughter came off as remarkably adorable to the nurse who was holding me, judging by how she smiled down at me and rocked me back and forth.

I clapped my baby hands kicked my feet happily doing my best to do a dance ' I'm in Japan, I'm in Japan I'm in Japan! It took me dying to a bunch of racists but I finnally made it to Japan!'

I chanted brokenly with my baby vocal cords "Ja-poo Ja-poo-Ja-poo!"

The nurse laughed and said "My my you're going to be a lively kid aren't you, just born and you're already bursting with happiness and energy, I can't help but wonder what's got you so happy? Is it me by any chance *pffft*" ( she gives me a rasberry on my stomach)

That tickled and I laughed at that but then it hit me 'Holy shit I understood what she said!'

And no she wasn't speaking english, she was still speaking Japanese but now all of a sudden I could understand Japanese as if it were English!

I was so stunned by this revelation that I didn't notice the nurse pass me over to my new mother until I felt someone with an equally small hand as mine pulling on*pauses* something on my chin.

I snapped out of my stunned state and felt my chin 'A beard? I'm a baby and I already have a beard? What the hell?!' I asked.

The woman who gave birth to me looked at me and I looked at the bundle right next to me, while I was wrapped in a blue buddle the other baby who was obviously my sibling was wrapped in a pink bundle.

'I have a sister! I'm not an only child any more!' I cheered internally.

I heard a man who was presumably a Doctor say "Congratulations Mr and Mrs Yoayorozu you have brought a strong beautiful pair of twins into this world! A baby boy who will grow up to be big and surpass his peers and a girl who will grow up to be talented like her father and pretty like her mother!"

'Youyorozu? I've heard that name several times before, all from the anime My Hero Academia, wait don't tell me I got isekai'd- hahaha no no that'll never happen in a million years to a dumb overweight japanophile like me'

My mother looked down at me and said "Doctor, why does my son already have a mustache and a goatee? And why does he already have a scar on the right side of his neck and face? Where did all these tattoos come from?"

'What I have tattoos and a scar too? Am I a baby that looks like a grown man?' I thought in horror.

The guy with the green persian cat head spoke up "Actually Sakurako-chan I think our sons light blue flower tattoos make him look badass as fuck!"

My new mother did her best to cover both my and my sisters ears and said "Language Ichigo-senpai language!"

I giggled at that 'My father shares a name with the protagonist from Bleach!'

My mother obviously named Sakurako groaned "Look what you've done Ichigo-senpai you've already made our son think bad language is funny"

My new father Ichigo simply laughed "Don't act like you didn't use a lot of bad language yourself during your porn star days which weren't to long ago, you only gave up being one of Japan's top ten porn stars a year and three months ago, as a porn star you were very vulgar and kinky so I don't think you have much room to talk about what's child appropriate"

I gasped 'Holy fucking- GROOOOOS my new mother is a former porn star?! Ok I feel very dirty right now'

I know I shouldn't judge, and deep down I didn't judge, after all it would be hypocritical to hate my mother for being a porn star considering all the japanese lesbian porn I watched in my past life.

It's just that, I felt EXTREMELY awkward having a japanese porn star for a parent after all the times I beat my meat to Japanese porn stars in my past life.

Can you understand why I feel dirty?

The Doctor cleared his throat, he looked uncomfortable "Moving on" he said "I believe your sons tattoos and scars are a result of his quirk which I theorize is a mutation type that was already active at birth"

My mother said "So what kind of abilities will my son have?"

My mind however heard a record scratch 'Wait a moment did that Doctor bastard just say quirk? As in the super powers in My Hero academia? I have a quirk? Did- Did I just get reincarnated into My hero academia'

The next thing I heard was my new mother asking "Ichigo-senpai what do you want to name our son? You should name him! You're better at boy names then me"

Ichigo answered "For some reason I feel a strange overwhelming compulsion to give our son a foreigner's name, I think it's a bad idea but at the same time I feel like I can't say no.

I feel like our son should be named Patrick- Patrick Yoayorozu.

And what are you going to name the girk Sakurako-chan"

My new mother sakurako put a finger to her chin "Momo- her name shall be Momo Yoayorozu after my favorite fruit"

I felt my heart skip a beat 'My sister is Momo yoayorozu! HOLY SHIT BALLS!' I cried in my head as I turned to look at my twin sister.

She was sleeping peacefully, out cold sucking on her thumb.

I began to think 'Holy shit this is more awkward then three hells considering how many times I masturbated to smutty Momo yoayorozu fanart and the kind of fanfiction I wrote about her in my past life, oh god I'm a horrible big brother! If I had known this was going to happen I would of- NO there was no way I could have known that I'd get reincarnated here, that I'd become Momo's older twin.

I screwed up in my past life but I WILL make things right, be a good big brother and protect Momo!'

I realized ' There are many other things I need to do! I-I need to get into UA! Specifically Class 1A! I need to be there during the USJ incident! The forrest training camp! There's so much I need to do! I can become a hero! Something that I wanted to do when I was a little kid!'

As I began running hypothetical scenarios in my mind on how I would handle the upcoming arcs, Momo woke up and began to cry and my new parents tried to calm her down.

'Wow Momo was a loud cryer as a baby' I thought.

And THAT is the true beginning to my story as a hero.

AUTHORS NOTES! .

So taters what do you think?

This is my second self insert fanfiction.

In this story I am reincarnated as Akainu and i have all the powers of Akainu including his super strength, his haki and his devil fruit.

I came up with my own versions of Momo's parents.

Sakurako the mother is a former porn star as for Ichigo the father you'll just have to read next chapter to find out his occupation!

ALSO I used Google translate to write my Japanese sentences so if they're wrong or off PLEASE forgive me!

Later taters!