Gheorghe woke up suddenly when he realised that he was alone in their bed. He sat up, far too quickly really, but when everything stopped spinning around, he concentrated and looked around. Johnny was not in the room. What was going on? Gheorghe was usually the one to wake up first. Suddenly, alarm bells started blaring in his mind. Something could have happened to Martin, or even to Deirdre. With his heart pounding faster and faster in his chest, he stood up and dressed as quickly as he could in the limited space left in their room since the addition of their new, bigger bed.
He almost fell on the steps as he rushed down the stairs, only to find Deirdre helping Martin with breakfast.

'Don't kill yourself like that lad' she said, with her usual stern face.

'I will try' he replied, calming himself. No emergency, ok.

'Where is John?'

'Out. Couldn't sleep like' she replied. Her face became even darker as she said that.

And, suddenly, everything became clear.
'The vote?'

Deirdre lifted her gaze to meet his and nodded very slightly.

'For what is worth, I think it's a lot of bollocks' she said.

Gheorghe smiled. He wanted to say, "I couldn't have put it better myself", but decided not to. Deirdre wasn't one for a lot of words, and he knew she knew how grateful he was to hear of her support.

John was another thing all together.

It didn't take long to find him, cleaning around the cows. Gheorghe hovered on the doorway for a moment, just watching his partner work. But it was clear that there was something wrong: he could tell Johnny's body was tense, and he was working himself almost with violence. If he continued like that, Gheorghe feared some accidents might happen.

'John' he called, stepping in.

John didn't hear him or react in any way, continuing on his destruction path.

'John' he called again, stepping closer.

'Did you hear?' he finally said.

'Deirdre told me' Gheorghe replied

Johnny nodded as he went back to work.

'John' Gheorghe called again, walking a little closer, trying not to scare the frightened animal.

'What?'

'It's ok?'

'How is it ok?' he shouted, throwing the shovel on the ground.

'How is it ok that my country voted to kick you and people like you out of here? How is it ok that they are already reporting more and more incidents of hate crimes against people? How is it ok that'?

'That?' Gheorghe said, with as gentle a voice as possible.

John shook his head and went to pick his tool.

'How is that ok that they might tear you away from me' his eyes were glassy, but there was a challenge in his voice. And anger.

Gheorghe smiled quietly, as he covered the remaining steps that separated them and took John's hands in his.

'I will never leave you'

'The choice might not be yours. Not anymore' he replied, freeing himself from the gentle grip and turning around.

'The choice is in the hands of a bunch of fuckwits'

'They might have had their reasons'

Gheorghe said, trying to temper the mood.

'What reasons? What reason! I heard those reasons, people saying "they come here and steal our jobs", "they live off benefits" and whatever'

'Then why are you so surprised?' Gheorghe had half expected this reaction the night before and had warned Johnny, who, on his part, was so relaxed as he had heard that the polls were predicting victory for the Remain camp.

'I don't know, I don't know, I guess I'm just scared' he said the last word much quieter than the rest.

'Why does it always need to come crashing down like this'

'Come here'

'No'

'Come here' Gheorghe insisted with a smile and dragged him into a hug. Johnny's body was rigid, fighting his for-a while, till he slowly relented and hugged Gheorghe back.

'I hate this'
'What, the hug?'
'Idiot'
'Sorry'

They stayed like that for a while, enjoying each other's closeness. They had mountains of work to do, but it could wait five more minutes.

'We could get married' Johnny said, with such a quiet voice that for a moment Gheorghe thought he had imagined it. He disentangled himself from their embrace and asked:

'What did you say?'
By now Johnny's ears were as read as a ripe tomato. He bit his lower lip before saying:

'We could get married, that way you are guaranteed to stay, aren't you?'

Gheorghe couldn't help it. It was the sweetest, most selfless thing he had ever heard. He caressed his partner's cheek and said:

'How many American movies have you watched?'

'Are you mocking me?' Johnny said, taking a step back with the deepest frown on his face.

'No' Gheorghe replied, shaking his head slightly.

'It's just that here it's not so simple'

'What do you mean?'

'That you don't get a green card by marrying a British citizen. To get the indefinite leave to remain and then the citizenship you need to have lived in this country for five years and have enough proof of it and that you earn enough to not be a burden on the British taxpayers and'

'Fuck them all' Johnny sputtered.

'You are one too' Gheorghe replied, refraining himself from saying that, well, on occasion he did fuck a British taxpayer and got fucked by one in return.

'How do you know all these things anyway?'

'Because I have done my research' he grabbed Johnny's hands again as he felt his cheeks warming up a little. He kept his eyes down to his partner's hands as he said:

'Because I feared being torn away from you too'

'You didn't tell me'

'Neither did you'

'Two idiots one thought. Anyway, you have been here for that long, we can apply for it then, I guess' Johnny's face was much brighter now, with the same level of love and affection Gheorghe remembered from that fateful day when he came to Scotland to claim Gheorghe for himself.

'I don't know'

'Why not? There is a way out, right? Why not take it? If you became a citizen here then you can come and go as you please, right? Then I could even apply for Romanian citizenship and'

'And learn Romanian?'

'Romanian with a Yorkshire accent? I think it's great' Johnny laughed. Gheorghe smiled at the lovely sound.

'What's wrong?'
'It's a lot of money'

'How much?' Johnny's enthusiasm damped immediately. From the bright puppy he had been a moment before, John looked like a beaten-up dog.

'More than a thousand pounds'

'What? Does being a citizen of this frigging place cost that much?'

Gheorghe nodded.

'Ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous'

'Ridiculous it may be, but I have already saved up about eight hundred. While we search for all the documents needed, we could save up some more and see. I don't think they will get themselves ready that quickly'

'They better not, otherwise they will have one angry Yorkshireman come for them'

Gheorghe dragged him into a hug once more.

'And when we get married, we will do it by our own choice, not because of the will of others.

Johnny nodded, his face still hidden in Gheorghe's chest.

'I love you'
'I love you'

It proved to be much tougher than they thought.

'Do they want proof of how many times you go to the bathroom too?' Johnny asked, racking his hands through his hair. It was only the third evening they were doing this, they had found all sorts of pieces of paper with Gheorghe's name on them and were now checking them against what was considered valid on the list of acceptable documents to present for inspections.

Gheorghe had started this thinking that they had to be selective, choose carefully what to present at the registry office in Bradford. But, as the level of tiredness and heaviness in his muscles was reaching new levels, he was starting to think that Johnny was right, just throw everything at the fuckers and see what they can do.

'You are going about this all wrong' Deirdre said, appearing in the room.
'It's late, I thought you had gone to sleep' John said, before yawning.

'There is no point in me resting, when you both are dead on your feet and have to do all the heavy work tomorrow' she said, shaking her head as she sat down at the head of the table with two black concertina folders. Gheorghe noticed she had put dividers and wrote the dates of the different years since he had been with them and before.

'So, you have to divide all of this by years, right?' she said, indicating the mountain of paper they had covered the table with.

'Yes' Gheorghe said, feeling his cheeks warm up just a little. It was so strange how a pile of paper was making him feel so naked in front of two of the people he loved most in the world. It was all there, from old plane tickets from Romania, to a tenancy agreement to even a receipt for a dentist appointment. Thank goodness that he had kept all his old bank statements and that he had insisted on putting his name on some of the bills for the farm.

'Leave this to me, you go to sleep'

'Nan, go to rest' Johnny protested, but, if Gheorghe had learnt something about the woman, it was that she was even more stubborn than John himself and, if she had decided something, there was no way you could dissuade her from it.

'Nan' John complained, as she took a first pile of docs.

'Go to sleep Johnny, the farm won't run itself'
'Are you sure you are ok to do this? You don't have to' Gheorghe asked.

'I am an old woman, I sleep less than you at night and I like things in order' she said. Gheorghe had the feeling that, buried under her coriaceous skin, was the will to do her part to help.

'Thank you'

'Nothing to thank me for' she replied, shaking her head. And yet, Gheorghe thanked her profusely with his heart.

The morning after they found on the table the two folders completely full of papers. The rest of the table was empty, and Deirdre was not awake yet.

Gheorghe then made an appointment with the registry office. There was a little while to wait, but he could pop in after two weeks.

'Would you be ok on your own?' John asked. There was a lot of work to do, they couldn't really afford for both of them to be off at the same time. He didn't like the prospect too much, but it would have to do. He always thought there is not much point in complaining and screaming when things need to be done, you grind your teeth and smile through the pain. And grinding his teeth he was, as he waited to be called for his appointment.

He had arrived stupidly early, because it's always better to arrive early then late, and was trying to stay focused, secretly watching the other people around him. There was another man in his same predicament, who was managing his nerves much worse than Gheorghe was, going through his documents over and over again. And there was a couple, a man and a woman. Gheorghe couldn't tell what they were there for, till two other young people arrived, all nicely dressed, giggling and shouting "congratulations". Of course, the two were getting married, they were at a registry office after all. They seemed so happy, their eyes beaming with the love they clearly felt for one another.

Suddenly, the memory of Johnny asking Gheorghe to marry him rushed back to the surface, invading his chest with a warm, pleasant feeling. Gheorghe would have said yes on the spot if the circumstances were different. Although it really didn't change much regarding his citizenship application, Gheorghe didn't want Johnny to do something he wouldn't have wanted to do otherwise. Not that he thought Johnny wasn't committed to their relationship, he trusted him with all of his being, but they had found a rhythm that worked for them, why risk breaking that?
And, yet, Gheorghe wanted it.

'Gheorghe?'
A female voice called, bringing him back to Earth.

This was so stupid. Why was he even nervous? He hadn't done anything wrong, he was just there to get his documents assessed before sending them away to the right people for assessment.

'How are you today, I hope you haven't been waiting too long' the woman smiled as she walked him through a series of corridors. She was pleasant enough, clearly trying to help him relax, and yet it had the complete opposite effect. Gheorghe felt his body get rigid and, somehow, his knowledge of the English language disappeared from his brain.

'Not long' he managed to say. She stopped, smiled again with just a hint of pity before opening the door to the most anonymous room he had ever seen, with just one desk and a chair either side, nothing else.

'So, show me your documents'
Gheorghe, quickly, grabbed the folders out of his bag. His hands were trembling.

'Wow, you certainly have brought a lot'
This time, Gheorghe was the one to smile.

He was walking home towards 2PM. The walk turned into a run when he spotted the police car outside their front door.
Breathlessly, he rushed into the living room, where the local rozzer was taking a statement from John and Deidre. John's face was devoid of any emotion.

'Oh, hi Gheorghe' the policeman said, a jolly, middle aged man called Peter.

'What's happening?'

'We are' Peter started
'This happened' John interrupted Peter by standing up and showing him an anonymous letter with a crazy handwriting and lines going all over the place.
'But there were three words repeated over and over again:

Go Home Gyppo.

'Ah' Gheorghe said.

'Ah?' Johnny repeated, his ears far too read for comfort.

'Sit down lad, let's finish this and do the right thing' Deirdre said, tugging at John's shirt. Johnny sat down and, for as much as Gheorghe was tried all he could to not look at him in the eyes, he could feel John's gaze burning his skin. He was grateful once again for Deirdre taking charge of the situation, finishing off with Peter, who then went on his merry way. Gheorghe just knew that nothing was ever going to happen from them reporting what happened.

'Did everything go well at the registry office?'
'Yes'

'Good. Now back to work'

Johnny didn't seem to need a second order and rushed out, Gheorghe following him.

They worked in silence for hours. Gheorghe was used to Johnny's silence and, deep down, he knew that his partner was going to open up when he was ready. This time though it was heavier than usual. Was John thinking that maybe all of this wasn't worth it? He could have it so much easier, he could find some British guy and that was that. No more papers, no more tension. No more anonymous letters bringing fear into his home. It was going to break Gheorghe's heart, but he was going to understand, right? Perhaps, if their parts were reversed, he would have done just that.

The sun was starting to set when John finally said:

'I'm sorry'

'For what?'

'For the letter'.

Gheorghe frowned. What the hell was he on about?

Johnny took a deep breath before adding:

'Only a few years ago I could have written a letter like that. I called you gyppo too'

'You were not the first and you won't be the last' Gheorghe said, giving him a little pat on the shoulder, hoping to help him calm down. He was used to things like that, he had made peace with that fact, being gay and having a funny accent ought to cause him trouble in the kind of environments he lived in.

But Johnny wasn't used to that. He didn't need to worry about how he sounded like, how sometimes the words just didn't come out right and people looked at his lips, almost trying to read them. Not to mention how when he made grammar mistakes it was because he was a bloody foreigner, one that had a good mastering of English but was never going to speak it properly, while, when John made mistakes (and God damn it if he made them) was a cute, regional dialect.

Gheorghe clutched his fists, keeping the anger in. In those many years he had learnt to reign it in, but, ever since that 24th June, it was coming back in waves, prompted by gentle blonde women with pity in their smiles and stupid idiots sending offensive letters. John was quiet again.

'Do you want me to leave?' Gheorghe asked.
'What are you on about?'

Gheorghe regretted speaking his mind immediately. But John wasn't the only one with abandonment issues. They come as a package with having no choice but to leave all your loved ones to hope to find some way to survive with dignity.

'If you were to be with a British guy, you wouldn't have to worry. You wouldn't have to worry about people looking at us weird because of how I sound and'

John, once again, surprised him. He cupped Gheorghe's face in his hands and said:
'I'm not good with words, but just know that these people don't scare me. I told you before that I want us to be together, and that means in the good times and in the bad'
Gheorghe smiled, putting on of his hands over Johnny's before saying:

'Are you sure?'

'I have never been more certain. You?'

'Of course'
'Well, that's sorted then' Johnny laughed. And just like that, Gheorghe was more in love with him than ever.

No answer came from the Home Office for a while and that gave them a little respite. No further letter came from their dear friend the Brexiteer and they could go back to do what they loved most, the farm and each other.

Then, the blue card arrived. It was a little piece of blue, folded up paper, stating that Gheorghe could stay indefinitely in the country.

"This is a little anticlimactic, isn't it?' Johnny said, after Gheorghe passed him the paper.
'Oh, is not over yet' Gheorghe said.

The moment he dreaded the most had arrived: he had to do the English test and the Life in the UK test. They ended up bringing the Life in the UK book with them during lambing season and studied together while eating. The first part was straightforward, all about the country's history, all stuff he had studied at school. There were some funky parts, like the makes of famous sports people.

'What the hell is this shite? Why would knowing about Torvill and Dean make you a better citizen?' Johnny said one evening, grabbing the book Gheorghe was reading out loud, too dumbstruck to believe his ears.

'Who are they?'

'Two ice skaters. I mean, football I guess, cricket too, but ice-skating' he said, flipping through the pages.
'Ah, and look, tell me, how long does it take to give blood in the UK?'

'What, does it differ from other places?'

'Apparently. Must be all the stuck-up-your-ass attitude, maybe it takes longer to draw it out'

'This is so stupid'

Johnny laughed.
'Why are you laughing?'

'It's the first time I hear you saying something bad about this situation. You know, you can get angry if you want'

'I guess part of me understands why people voted the way they voted'
'Who are you, what did you do to Gheorghe?'

'Freak. I just know that unfortunately, there are people like me that play the system, as well as some British workers that accuse people of stealing their jobs because they can't keep one. So I understand, it's just, I wish I didn't have to do all of this, that you didn't have to do all of this, and that people stopped looking at me weird just because I speak funny' Johnny moved closer to him, passing a hand on his thigh.

'I like the way you speak' he said, his hand moving slowly, so, so slowly, up Gheorghe's leg.

'I like the way you move' Johnny said, his voice dropping in volume. His hand was now dangerously close to Gheorghe's groin, making him shiver in expectation of what he thought was coming.

'I love the way you make me feel' he said, his hand now on his member, gone hard ever since Johnny had moved closer. He had recognised the fire in his partner's eyes. The same fire he knew was burning in him too.

Gheorghe passed the tests without issues. In both cases, the language and the Life in the UK one, he spent more time getting the administrator checking and checking again if he was really who he said he was than sitting the actual test.

'Any Torvill and Dean questions?' Johnny asked when he got back.
'No, thank goodness'

There was one more obstacle before sending the application out: they had to find two people willing to certify that Gheorghe was who he said he was (which was admittedly a hurdle, as the passport photos he had taken were horrible and didn't make him justice, as Deirdre had said, while John had just laughed his heart out). The first one was easy, it just needed to be someone with a British passport, so Johnny had already recruited Robyn to do it for them.

'She said she is delighted to help' Johnny said, having been on the phone for almost an hour, with her chatting most of the time.
The real problem was the second reference. It couldn't be any family member or friend and it had to be someone with a very specific occupation.

'Who the hell are we going to ask? Do you know any pilots? Anyone?' Johnny said, reading through the list repeatedly, almost as if he was trying to will it to change.
'No, but you could always ask the vicar' Deirdre replied, as she ironed their clothes and Martin's.

'Are you mad, nan? The woman hates my guts' he replied, slumping on the table.
'Why does she hate your guts?' Gheorghe asked. They had been together forever now and yet there were still things he didn't know about John. He was starting to think that there were always going to be some, and he couldn't wait to take his time to find them all out.

'Because I might have led on her son when, you know' he said, starting to mumble a little.

'You see, what goes around comes around. You could still man up and go and ask her. I know she is a reasonable woman, I'm sure she will understand'

'Why don't we ask Peter?' Gheorghe said, taking the paper back and scanning through the different professions, some he didn't even understand. What the hell is a Justice of the Peace?

'Ah, that's a great idea!'

Gheorghe smiled, amused, but he knew Johnny could see from his gaze that, one day, he was going to ask for some details about this anonymous vicar's son.

They ambushed Peter in the pub the following Saturday night and, after plying him with a few beers, the far too relaxed policeman agreed to do it but with a condition.

'My daughter wants to go interrailing on the continent next summer. She is more and more insistent now as she says, "got to do it before Brexit dad, god knows what's going to happen dad" and bla bla bla. So, I don't suppose you could help her out'

'I have never been interrailing,' Gheorghe said. Not that he wouldn't have wanted to, but some people need to work.
'But you could advise her on the best parts to visit in Romania, what bits to leave out and stuff like that. She is a bit clueless you see, even if she thinks she knows everything. You know, these young adults and whatever'
In the end, he agreed to do it. As they walked out, Gheorghe sighed.

'What?' Johnny asked.

'When is this going to end? When am I going to be able to stand on my own two feet?

When will I finally stop having to ask for other people's kindness just to prove that this is my land as much as everybody else's?' Gheorghe said. He didn't want to complain. He didn't even mind doing that favour for Peter, as he had been kind enough when they were having to deal with the anonymous letter. And yet, it just came out of him. He was feeling embarrassed and really, really fed up with having to constantly do this. It felt like this whole process, right or wrong as it was, was meant to be a way to break someone's soul.

Johnny didn't say a word, but he hugged him tight, till the sadness was gone.

The very last hurdle was the completion of the application and the submission of the paper. It turned out that, if they had a scanner, they could put all the documents (pretty much the same as the ones he had sent for the indefinite leave to remain) in the computer, send them to this independent company contracted by the Home Office and then wait. Robyn came to the rescue again, offering to scan the documents for them, as they didn't have one.

'But I want something in return' she said, as they gathered in the pub one evening when she was home from her new job in York.

'Shoot' Johnny replied, moving his glass left and right. He was not downing drink after drink anymore. Gheorghe couldn't have been prouder.

'You will come to my birthday party, right?'

The two of them looked at each other.
'Come on! Please?'
'Ok'

Later in the evening, Johnny excused himself to go to the bathroom. Gheorghe couldn't help it, he did look at him with some apprehension in his eyes. John nodded and, with a little, reassuring smile, he said:

'I will be back in a moment'.
Gheorghe and Robyn were silent for a moment, before she said:
'So, what is going on with you too? You have been together so long, are you, you know, thinking what I am thinking?'
She seemed to continue talking nonstop, as Gheorghe's gaze was still fixed to where John was going to reappear any second now.

'I will ask him to marry me when all of this is over'

When he heard her squeak loudly, he turned to face her.

'Please, please, please, can I help you choose the ring?'

Gheorghe could feel his cheeks warm up. Truth was that he already had a ring, his grandfather's, his mother had given it to him last time he was back home for a quick visit. Ever since then, he had hidden it in the depth of his sock drawer, hoping that John wasn't going to find it.

'Oh my god, oh my god I am so excited' Robyn said

'Excited about what?' John said, reappearing on the scene.

'Nothing. I am going to bring her some of my cheese for the party' Gheorghe said, surprising himself for the quick response. Johnny gave him a strange look, he knew that something was going on, but he didn't ask anything else. Gheorghe made a mental note to find a more secure position for the ring.

Deirdre insisted that Johnny accompanied him to the last step before the submission of the application. They needed to go to a special office to have someone take Gheorghe's biometric details, check that the scans Robyn sent were fine and finally send the application away. Gheorghe had said that he was fine to go again by himself, but, at the end of the day, it turned out that Johnny's presence there helped immensely to steady his nerves, which were completely in fire, to the point that, when he had to sign his name on the electronic pad to record his signature, he had to do it a few times, because, for some reason, his brain seemed to have completely forgotten his surname.
As they stepped out of the grey building, Gheorghe dragged Johnny against the wall and kissed him senseless.

Should I do it now, he wondered? He had brought the ring with him, stuffing it into his pocket partly as a good luck charm, partly because he thought he could do it. It was not the most romantic setting, grant you, but they had done it, they had worked through a massive issue, spent almost a year in the process, and had come through to the other side.
But then, perhaps a little superstitiously, decided not to go with his plan. There was still a chance that the Home Office was going to tell him to sod off, meaning that all their efforts and all their money would have gone to waste. He was not going to tie his marriage proposal to something like that.

The clerk at the office had said that, officially, they claimed it took six months for an application to be reviewed, but, in practice, it usually took between three to four months. The first couple of months, Gheorghe tried to keep any thoughts regarding the application at bay. But then, when the third month struck, slowly it became a constant thought. The first thing in the morning was the post, and every time he got back home, he imagined seeing Deirdre with the envelop in her hand. But it never seemed to happen.

And then, as it happens in most of these cases anyway, one day when his mind was completely distracted, the letter was there, right on the table when they got back home from work.
'The postman was a little late this morning, so you lads were already out when it got here' Deirdre said.

'Come on, open it'
Gheorghe wasn't sure what to do. Right in that very moment, he was at the same time a soon to be citizen, and a scumbag that had been rejected by the stupid Home Office.

'Do you want me to open it?' John suggest, interlacing his fingers with Gheorghe's. Gheorghe only managed a little nod.

'You sure?'

'Yes'

Johnny seemed to take it incredibly slowly, but finally opened the envelop.

'You are invited to a citizenship ceremony! You need to book it, it says, and you need to pay for it, of course, because why would they make it easy for you now, and'
Gheorghe couldn't contain the happiness that flow through him. He rushed to Johnny and passed his arms around his waist, burying his head in his neck.

And utter, complete happiness makes you do the craziest of things.

'Marry me' he whispered, his face still hidden in John's neck. Screw the ring, screw waiting, screw making everything perfect. All he wanted was there. He was with the love of his life and they were now safe. Why wait any longer?
'What?'
'Marry me'
John passed his hands on his neck. They were freezing cold, but steady.

'Yes'