a/n Here's another Smutty Saturday! We're at the dropship again, exploring some of the issues raised by some chats I've had on Twitter recently - especially the question of whether Bellamy's supposed sexual prowess is plausible. Huge thanks to Stormkpr for betaing this. Happy reading!
This visit to Bellamy's tent has not turned out quite how Clarke was expecting – to say the least.
They started out well enough. A heated kiss by the water barrels. Then a dash to his tent, clothes being stripped of frantically, more kisses. Then he went down on her for a while and yes, sure, it wasn't the best oral she's ever had but it was pretty... functional. It felt pleasant enough and served the purpose of getting her wet and ready.
But things have been going downhill since then, unfortunately. Since the moment Bellamy got his cock inside of her and started rocking his hips. It's not that he's going too hard and hurting her, or anything like that. It's more that she's bored, frankly. There are still good things, of course – she's loving the chance to check out his back and shoulders and arms with her hands. That's keeping her somewhat turned on, to say the least. And there are still kisses along the way, but actually they're a little too sloppy for her liking.
It's all too quiet, too. All she can hear is the sound of Bellamy's breathless gasps and her own quieter, more controlled panting. She thought he'd be chatty in bed, damn it. They bicker and banter plenty outside this tent, and she's disappointed to find they've left that attitude at the door.
Maybe she can try doing something about that.
"You want to help me out a little?" She demands, carefully light, tugging at one of his hands. She doesn't much mind whether he moves it to a breast or her clit or frankly even to her neck. She's not usually into that but she'll take anything, right now, to elevate this beyond a bit of pointless see-sawing and a few messy kisses.
"Yeah. Shit. Sorry." He gasps out, reaching clumsily for her breast.
She frowns against his neck for a while. Why is he being so apologetic and almost flustered? She's really very puzzled. This isn't the confident, cocksure Bellamy she thinks she knows.
This is better now, anyway. That hand on her breast is helping. He's really got the hang of that part, squeezing the whole thing lightly in his hand whilst giving a little special attention to her nipple.
"That's good." She tells him, honest and encouraging.
"Uh-huh." He grunts, panting, breath catching in his throat.
She wonders what to try next. Maybe she should ask him what he likes? Maybe she should have asked him that before they jumped into bed. She knows communication is important and all that, but she just thought it was going to be fine. They communicate really well around the camp. She's seen some satisfied girls leave this tent. She thinks it's only logical that she expected this to go seamlessly, expected them to read each other's preferences instinctively.
So much for that.
"Do you -"
"I'm sorry. I'm -"
Wow. That's him coming – and apologising for it, too. Then he's slumping on her chest for a moment, breathless and sweaty and groaning a groan which sounds more frustrated than satisfied.
She did not expect that. She doesn't mind that he came first – of course she doesn't. That's just life, isn't it? But she's surprised that he seems so uncomfortable, that he came without telling her how he was doing, that he appears so out-of-control of his own sex life.
He rolls off her and immediately reaches a hand down towards her crotch.
"Sorry. Let me get that for you." He offers, a game attempt at his usual light, cocky tone.
"Sure. And don't worry about it. Your hands are beautiful – this should be good."
"Thanks. Your tits are more gorgeous." He bounces straight back at her.
She grins. This is fine. This is something like their usual dynamic. Maybe he was just nervous or overexcited for their first time together, then. Maybe if they keep doing this he'll relax into it.
Or maybe he's just thoroughly inept in bed, she thinks, drawing away from his hand with a gasp.
"Sorry." She mutters. "It's just – that wasn't quite right. Think you caught me with a nail."
"Sorry. Let me try again."
He goes slower, more carefully, this time. He locates her entrance, slips a couple of fingers inside, and then once he's comfortably in place he starts moving.
It's not bad, as such, this time. He doesn't hit any of the wrong stuff. But he's not hitting that much of the right stuff, either. And he seems to have decided that speed is more important than precision which – no. No it's not.
She tries to piece together a plan.
"How do you feel about watching me masturbate?" She asks, abandoning all subtlety. She wants to get off, damn it, and she thinks getting herself off while she admires the view of Bellamy naked is beginning to look like the best option, here.
He takes her hint. He pulls his hand away at once. "Yeah, sure. If you want. I'm sorry – this isn't really my best thing." He says, trying to laugh at himself and not quite succeeding.
No shit. Not really his best thing? Yeah, she noticed that.
She tries to play it off with a small giggle and a light smile. "No worries. Not the end of the world. I guess I'm just surprised – you always seem so sure of yourself. I thought you'd know exactly what you're doing."
Maybe she shouldn't have said all that. But she's frustrated, damn it. She's swamped in unsatisfied desire and that's enough to crack even her self-control.
Bellamy frowns. "Well apparently I don't."
"It's good. It's fine. Just – I expected -"
"You expected me to be better. Yeah. I got that, thanks." He bites out, sour. "And why did you expect me to be better, Clarke? When exactly am I supposed to have learnt to be some sex god? While I was hiding my sister under the floor? You think I just used to bring fuck buddies home all the time while she was right there? Or did you think maybe I went on some kind of wild sex-bender when my mother got floated? How am I supposed to have -?"
"I didn't think, OK? Obviously I didn't think." Her tone rises to match his. "Maybe for once in my life I stopped thinking too hard and just went with oh, hot guy, satisfied girls, want to get me some of that."
That helps, actually. That has him smirking slightly despite their brewing argument. "Really? You can't think straight when I'm around?"
"You heard me."
There's a beat of silence. It's the most tense silence Clarke has known, desire and frustration thickening the air. But Bellamy is still trying to smirk, too.
He really did seem to like that thing she said about not thinking when he's around.
To her surprise, he is the one who breaks the silence.
"They're mostly pretty easily satisfied." He says, quiet, hesitant. "They're here to sleep with an older guy who leads the camp. They don't actually care whether the sex is that great – it's more a status thing. Mostly I just go down on them for a bit until they either come or fake it. I should have known you'd be more... challenging than that." He concludes, still quiet, but perhaps with the confidence to tease just a little.
She considers her words for a moment. "If it's any consolation, most of them probably aren't faking it in that case. The oral really wasn't bad."
He snorts out a hollow laugh. "Not bad. Right. Sorry about that, too." He swallows. "So come on, then. You're Clarke, right? Isn't this the part where you challenge me to do better? I'm guessing you don't want to sit here listening to me berating myself all day."
"OK. Yeah. Sounds good." She throws him a cautious grin. "You want to watch while I masturbate for a bit? I can give you some tips."
"Yeah. Sounds perfect."
She nods, slips her fingers into place. She's still pretty wet, despite that conversation. Or maybe because of it. Maybe because Bellamy has proven to be exactly the guy she always knew him to be – maybe not the sex god part, but better than ever at learning from his mistakes and doing the best he can for other people.
She gets started with the lesson. "So just bear in mind everyone's different, OK? I'm just telling you what I like. Other partners might want something else. It's all about listening to what they're saying and reading their body language. You were actually pretty good at that part – you got it when I was asking you to give me something more with your hand."
He nods, earnest. But also staring very hard at her naked body, as if he can't quite believe she's still here.
Yeah. She's never been one for giving up without a fight.
"See how I've got my hand angled so that I'm pressing down on my clit while my fingers are inside? You were missing that part. The clit's important. If you're not feeling so confident you could probably just grind on my clit and give me a couple of fingers sitting inside and I'd come eventually."
Another earnest nod. "And if I want to try harder than that?"
"Honestly, the most important tip I'm going to give you is to stop trying so hard. You seemed a bit too determined to kiss me really deep and wet, and not everyone is into that. And when you tried to use your hand for me just now you were going really fast and firm but not hitting the right spots."
"OK. Yeah. That makes sense."
"If you do want to try something a bit better, it's about curling your fingers inside to get the right angle." She pulls out to demonstrate. "You're trying to rub the sensitive part on the inside wall. The G spot doesn't really exist but it might be an easy way to remember it all the same. Clit on the outside, find what feels good inside." She summarises, getting stuck in again.
"OK. And what you're doing now is what you like? If I copy you, we should be good?"
"Yeah. You mean you want to take over?"
"Hell yeah." He laughs. "I promise I'll do better this time. I just really want to see the look on your face when I get this right and make you feel good."
She grins. That's definitely an idea she can get on board with. She pulls out the way and lets Bellamy take over.
He doesn't start with his hand between her legs. She's really pleasantly surprised by that, actually. He starts instead by wrapping an arm all the way around her until he can reach her breast on the other side. It's perfect – a reminder of those big, strong arms, as well as a light touch on her breast.
"That's good." She tells him, reaching up for a kiss.
He smiles against the kiss, keeps it lighter and cleaner than before. Then he gets started with his hand, slipping inside, keeping some pressure on her clit just like she asked him to.
"This OK?"
"Yeah. A little deeper?" He shifts slightly. "Yeah. Perfect. There."
He seems to have a new sense of confidence, this time round. Now he knows what she wants, and now he knows he's getting it right, he is much bolder in the way he touches her, much more relaxed when he pulls away from the kiss to grin down at her.
This is more like it. This is what she expected from a visit to Bellamy's tent. He does still have that same personality she thought she had got to know – he just needed pointing in the right direction.
She feels bad about it, actually. Obviously he's not as experienced as he's been trying to make out. She should have realised that sooner. Naturally he didn't get a lot of sexual practice as a young man with a sister to look after. She ought to have figured that out, and been supportive of him – she's beginning to suspect that supporting each other is what they do best.
"Is it OK?" Bellamy asks, breaking her train of thought.
"Yeah. Perfect. Sorry. Just – got distracted. I've got a lot on my mind." She admits, a little breathless.
"That's OK. I get it. Just relax and let me take care of you." He murmurs, kissing her softly once more.
She tries her hardest to do as he asks. It's not easy – she does have a lot on her mind. Not just Bellamy's sexual inexperience and insecurity, but also more life and death things about running the camp. But she does her best to shove all that aside and concentrate on soft kisses, on careful hands, and on the beautiful face grinning down at her.
"You're doing great." She gasps out, growing breathless now. Bellamy really is great at following her instructions, for a guy who has resolutely refused to follow any advice of hers outside the tent. No – that's unfair. He was like that at first, but they are working much more effectively together of late.
"Relax. I've got you."
It gets easier to stay in the moment, the closer she climbs. Her world narrows to the pleasure between her legs, to the warmth and safety of Bellamy's embrace, until she's falling apart, clenching hard around his fingers.
"Stay there." She gasps. She needs him to give her something to squeeze until she's done.
He does as she asks. He stays put, kissing her softly, until at last she reaches with her hand to tug his fingers away. His arm settles around her waist, instead, his hand sticky but not unpleasant against her side.
"Sorry. That was a big one. Hope I didn't crush your fingers." She jokes.
He laughs – a bright, relaxed, purely joyful sound. A sound like none she has ever heard him make. "We're good. It was worth it. That felt incredible. Thanks for the tips." He seems almost as blissed out by the moment as she is, frankly.
She grins. "No worries. Maybe we could swap some time? I haven't given many blowjobs and I'm sure I could use some advice. I didn't get chance to practise much in solitary." She points out, wanting to make him feel more comfortable about his earlier admission.
"Yeah. I'd like that. You want to do this again some time, then? Even though it – uh – wasn't that great for you?" He asks, his arms tightening just a little around her.
"It was perfect by the end." She tells him firmly, and watches his gaze grow warm at her words.
"So one of the things I've learnt about sex today is that I might have a little bit of a praise kink." He admits, slightly shy.
She smiles softly up at him. "That's OK. I like telling you you're doing the right thing. I get the feeling people don't tell you that often enough."
"Thanks." He tries for something more like his usual smirk. "So at least it turned out alright in the end?"
"Yeah. But it's not like I'm only here for the sex, is it? You must know that when I kissed you in the first place I wasn't thinking about having the best orgasm of my life or something. I just – we get on well, and you're hot, and I like you." She says, giving a careful shrug. That small confession was harder to make than she might have expected.
"Yeah? I thought you were just grateful I helped you with the water." He jokes.
"That didn't hurt your case. But – yeah. I'd definitely do this again if you're up for it. We can keep practising together."
"I'd like that. I'm sorry I need so much practice."
"It's fine. Everyone has to learn it sometime, don't they? Like I said, there are things I should practise too."
"So do you maybe want to make this a regular thing?" He asks, jaw tight, eyes watching her carefully.
"Are you asking me out?"
"No. There's nowhere to go. I'm asking you to stay inside my tent. With me, preferably." He counters.
She laughs. She should have known he'd manage to make even this into something worth arguing over. "Sure. You mean you want me to stay in here all day? Or should I go outside and get on with what I was doing before we ended up here?"
"That depends." He teases around a kiss. "What were you doing?"
"Checking you out, mostly. I was about to go do rounds in med bay."
He makes a show of considering that. "I should probably let you go to med bay. We do have kids to look after. But when you next find some time to check me out, maybe you could just bring me back here instead?"
"Yeah. Sounds like a plan."
It's not what Clarke was expecting, when she walked in here. She was expecting some smooth but perhaps slightly detached lovemaking from a confident and competent guy. She was probably expecting some teasing along the way, yes, but not much more human connection than that.
This is better, she decides, snuggling deeper into Bellamy's arms. The honesty and vulnerability of it, the fact they've decided to make a real relationship of this.
And apart from anything else, he really does have beautiful hands.
a/n Thanks for reading!