Honey I met A Scientist Crazier than Me.
It was a typical day in Nevada, 1992. Wayne Szalinski had gained fame twice over due to his experiments with the shrink ray and he found himself in an inventor's convention in Las Vegas. Some inventions were half baked and his machine was not one of them. His booth however was next door to another inventor. We don't see who it is, but we see a small vet cage with a live rabbit along with a couple of flasks and syringes. One of which was a full of a blue/violet liquid and the other filled with a glowing green liquid. As Wayne goes to make sure his booth is secure, he bumps into a man. Causing him the man to drop what looks like a medical bag. Getting a good look at he man he notices the man was very thin as though he never eaten in years, with dark black hair, thick glasses and wearing a combination of a black trench coat, white dress shirt with black tie and black pants. Wayne, chuckling nervously starts the conversation. "I'm sorry, I didn't see you there." He says. the man dusts himself off and picks up his bag. Speaking in a sort of indifferent tone of voice. "That's ok." He said "You can't really hurt anything there except my notes and this bag took it's fair share of beatings. You must be the neighboring booth." Wayne smiles and reaches to shake the man's hand. "You're the guy next to me?" He asks. "I'm Wayne Szalinski." At first the man didn't seem interested in his handshake, but shook his hand none the less. "West." He said. "Herbert West." Wayne backs up allowing him room to set his bag next to the cage. However he takes one look at the shrink ray in Wayne's booth. "What is that thing?" He asks. To which Wayne in a slight boast. "Oh that's my shrink ray." Herbert was taken aback, part of him was in disbelief, but at the same time he was mildy impressed. "Let me guess." He begins. "You figured out a way to decrease the empty space between molecules allowing the object or living thing to be brought down to 3/4 of an inch in height?" Wayne smiles nodding, impressed that this man knows his physics. "That's exactly right." He says. "I even managed to bypass the law that requires said shrunken objects and organics to increase in density." Herbert gives out a warm smile, very genuine compared to any other time he's had to. "I'll admit, physics is not my forte, but I am very impressed." He said. "I may have heard of you before, you weren't that scientist that accidentally shrunk his children and made his baby into a giant are you?" He gives him a look that seems to come across as interrogating. Spooking Wayne for a moment as he sheepishly replies. "Yes. The neighbor's kids too. It was horrifying." He said. "Before, we didn't even know the machine works. I've had failed attempts that figuratively and literally blew up in my face. The kids ended up in my backyard fighting off Bees and Scorpions. My son Adam, poor baby, his only crime was thinking Las Vegas was his play room. Though the people of Nevada were very sympathetic." Herbert goes back to smiling. He says. "Don't worry, I don't judge. I've had my own experiments gone wrong before too. Though I am sincerely glad that you were able to resolve everything. May I see it work?" Wayne smiles and nods. "Well we can't use this one, because it's mostly a display piece, however I can show you how it works with this." Wayne says as he reaches into his brief case. "Though I must ask you to swear you will not steal this or the credit for this." He adds. Herbert seemed offended at first, but sighs. "You have my word." He says. "The last thing I'd want to do is plagiarize. I may want to incorporate it, but the stuff I incorporate I give full credit to the inventor. I know what it's like to know people having their work stolen from them. There was one person." Wayne opens his case and pulls out a pistol like device. Which looked like a combination of the bigger shrink ray and a paintball gun. "I figured if I was gonna keep using the technology why not think smaller too." He says. "This is just as powerful as the ray, but it requires less power. There's a cooling system which was inspired by Ronald Thompson. He hit a baseball in my window which went into the path of the laser, reducing the heat and preventing explosions." Herbert nods along. "Well Isaac Newton founded physics when an apple fell on his head, so it makes sense an object of similar size would do the trick." He says. "Exactly." Wayne says. "Do you have anything I could use. I would use stuff from my own booth, but I would think you'd want better proof if it was something you know I don't have." Herbert thought for a moment and said. "You know what? I have just the thing." He takes the green flask and places it on Wayne's Table. "It's alright I got plenty more in my bag." He says. Wayne motions West to stand back which he does. He aims the gun carefully and fires. The flask disappears in a flash of light. West looks in shock. "It's Gone!" He shouts. Almost enraged. Wayne smiles. "No it's not." He gives Herbert his magnifying glass. Herbert looks on curiously. Seeing the shrunken bottle and it's contents intact. Wayne gives him a moment to look before getting him to step back. He fires at the same spot, causing the bottle to appear in it's normal size unharmed. "Wow Szalinski. You certainly know your stuff." He says. "This could revolutionize a few things. Storage, food supply, you name it. It's literally on par with what I've been trying to do my whole life." Wayne looked at him as a curious expression formed around his face. "So what does that green stuff do?" He asks. Herbert places his medical bag on his own table and takes out his notes. Wayne reads "With various animating solutions I have killed and brought to animated life an number of rabbits, guinea pigs, cats and do...Dogs?" Wayne thinks Note to self, keep Quark away from this guy. "So." He says. "If what you're notes say is accurate you have been able to bring Animals back from the dead?" To which Herbert nods. "Yes. I'll admit like I said, things have gone wrong on many occasions. However even the wrong stuff, proves promising. Bringing them back is easy, but keeping them sane has proven to be quite difficult." "Hmm." Wayne begins. "As a human being I can't really condone your experiment, but as a scientist you have my curiosity. Maybe if you take me through the process, I could probably find something." Herbert thinks for a moment. "Ok, but we'll have to do this in private. I have an animal already for the test. We'll just wait for the convention to be over and you'll see."
The convention goes off without a hitch and everyone packs and leaves. Except Wayne and Herbert. They set up a table with Herbert bringing out a cage and another chemical. Inside the cage is a black cat. "I'll understand if you don't wish to see this part, but it's necessary." He says. Wayne cringes a little. "My kids witnessed an Ant twice their size get killed by a scorpion. I think I can handle this." He said. Herbert then takes a large jar, motioning Wayne to step back. He places a cloth inside with the chemical. Causing a gray steam to emit. Once cleared, Herbert takes the cat and places the cloth over it's face. Explaining what he's doing. "This chemical simulates a heart attack without damaging the tissue." He says. After the cat has died he placed it in the cage. Taking the flask of green chemical out of his bag. "This is my Re-agent. If your Shrink ray is as genuine as you say it is, then the chemicals should still be intact." He continues. Herbert takes a syringe out and takes a small amount of the Re-Agent out of the flask and into it. "I shall now inject the Re-Agent in the brain." He says as he does so. He locks the cage quickly as Wayne watches on. The cat begins to stir and howl in pain, creating a sound similar to that of a recording playing from slow to normal speed. "Birth is always painful." West says. Wayne watched with amazement and slight disgust. "Amazing." He said. "He was dead before." Herbert rolled his eyes as though he wasn't the first to see this. Once the cat got used to the pain of the Re-Agent working through it's system, it's first response is slamming into the cage trying to scratch and bite at West. Wayne watches on, studying the behavior. Eventually Herbert kills the cat once more. "So." He said. "What do you think." To which Wayne replies. "Well I'm not gonna lie, this is pretty terrifying. However if you want an expert opinion. You do have something going there. There are only two flaws. While I understand the first flaw can't be helped, I do believe that the pain the cat felt upon coming back was so agonizing that it may have contributed to it's overall behavior. However, there's also flaw #2. The first thing it did after getting used to the chemicals, was try to attack you. It was like it remembered how it died and it knew what killed it." Herbert nods attentively. "All that just from one look." He said. "I'm impressed. While I can't help with the pain, because I believe it's an integral process. A reminder of life. However what you said regarding their behavior, does make sense. It may be a while before I can implement it, but I may find a solution to both problems." He looks at his watch. "Well I must be off. It was nice to meet you Wayne Szalinski." In a surprising display of gratitude Herbert is the one to instigate the handshake. To which Wayne returns. "Likewise Herbert West." He says. "I hope you find what you're looking for." They part on friendly terms as Wayne goes home to Diane. Diane was reading a newspaper before Wayne walks in the door. "Wayne." She says Happily. "How was the convention?" "Well Diane." He said. "I may have gotten some investors interested in the shrink pistol. The convention itself had some great ideas and well..." Diane looks at Wayne suspiciously. "Well what Wayne?" She asks. To which he responds "Honey, I met a scientist crazier than me." At first Diane laughed it off. "Really?" she asked. "Crazy how?" Wayne shook nervously, but decided to tell her, not wanting to hide anything from her. "Well this man, somehow made a chemical that could bring the dead back to life. I could hardly believe it until I seen it myself. He brought a dead cat back to life." Quark barks at the mere mention of the word cat. Not forgetting the Thompson's cat. Diane then looked concerned she had the newspaper in her hands shaking. "Uh Wayne?" she asks. "This man wouldn't happened to be named Herbert West would it?" Wayne's eyes widened. He never even mentioned his name. "Yes." He said. "How did you know?" Her eyes widened in shock, her face froze and she slowly hands Wayne the newspaper, before fainting on the floor. "Diane!" He shouted. "Not again, what did I do this time." He reads the newspaper. "Herbert West, a controversial student of Miskatonic University in Arkham, is wanted for multiple counts of murder, malpractice and the participation of unethical experiments on the corpses of human beings. The result of which caused a massacre that ended the lives of famed Dr. Carl Hill, Dean Alan Halsey and his daughter Megan Halsey." Wayne looks at Diane's fainted body and looks back at the paper. "Uh Diane?" He says. To which Diane slurs "Yes Honey?" "I'm...coming with you." He says before fainting himself.
The end.