"Hello?" Mike answers his cell phone while sitting at his desk, working on his latest case. The number is not saved in his contact list and is not one he recognizes.
"Michael? Hello." A woman with a British accent is on the other side of the call. "Hi, this is Paula."
"Paula? Paula who?" Mike answers, though he is aware of who Paula is, he hasn't actually spoken or even met her and frankly, her calling him Michael sort of irked him.
"Paula. Paula Agard. I am Harvey's girlfriend. I was wondering if you had a few moments to speak." She replies civilly but Mike can detect something in her voice, perhaps disappointment. Disappointment in Mike not "knowing" who she was.
"Oh, Paula. I guess I have a few minutes. What did you wish to speak about?" Mike was trying to be civil and pleasant enough but wasn't thrilled about this conversation. He knew that the relationship between Harvey and Paula was the most serious one Harvey has had in awhile and he didn't want to begrudge his friend the chance at happiness, but he also knew that Harvey was blind to where his true happiness lied. But he wasn't going to say that out loud, so he would do his best to be nice, however much it hurt.
"Well you know Harvey's birthday is coming up soon and I was wondering if you might have any ideas of what would make a good present. I don't want to get him something he would hate." Paula inquires.
"Paula, I'm not the one to ask that to. I have no clue what to get him." Mike honestly answers, knowing that this wouldn't be the answer Paula would like.
"But you're his best friend. Surely you must have some idea."
"Sorry. I don't. Oh, Paula I am going to have to go, a client just walked into my office. Have a good day." Mike quickly wraps up the call. He knows he was abrupt but he really didn't want to start a conversation with her since they've never met. After setting down his phone, he mutters to himself but loud enough for Rachel to notice as she walks into his office.
"What's up? Your face doesn't look happy. I would say confused if I was guessing."
"Umm. I'm not sure. That was . . . Paula."
"Oh. I understand the face now. I am confused about that myself. Why was she calling you?" Now Rachel has her own look on confusion.
"She wanted to know what to get Harvey for his birthday. You know something special. I have no idea why she would call me. I guess maybe she thinks I'm Harvey's best friend."
"Or maybe she called you because the person that knows Harvey the best is the only person she'll never call." Rachel slightly nods with a knowing look on her face.
"Okay. Got something on your mind?" Mike can see that Rachel clearly is holding something back. And if he was a betting man, it is probably something similar to what is on his own mind.
"If Paula really wanted to know what Harvey might want for his birthday, the best person to ask is Donna. Isn't that who you asked when you wanted to get him something? I mean she is the only person who has been in Harvey's life consistently for a long period of time. But Paula clearly doesn't want to ask her. I wonder why that is." Rachel says with a knowing look.
Mike shakes his head slightly in agreement. "Yeah. Donna gets Harvey like no one else. I just don't get it between them."
"What I don't get is why Paula? They have nothing in common. He doesn't even seem all that happy. I mean he was practically walking on air when Donna returned to his desk, both after the Coastal Motors thing and Louis. And that is a professional relationship. But a personal relationship, I mean if you are dating someone for any amount of time, you should feel some joy in that and it would show to others. I just don't see that with Harvey." Rachel ponders. She wants to say more about Donna's side of things but she knows that might be skirting the line of breaking her code with Donna. But she also knows that some prodding of their two best friends may be in order.
"Yeah, I don't see it either. It isn't like he has brought Paula up much since they started dating and he certainly didn't bring her up at all before. He hasn't introduced her to me or you and he hasn't brought her to any work functions. I mean he could've brought her to that reception we had a couple of weeks ago for that charity thing. It's almost like he might be ashamed of their relationship or something."
"Or something…" Rachel mutters out loud, hoping Mike didn't pick it up but unfortunately she was loud enough.
"Ok Rachel, what do you know?" Mike questions, setting his computer aside to give her his full attention.
Rachel turns around to quickly close Mike's office door and then returns to sit in one of the chairs in front of his desk.
"I'm not sure I should be telling you but I do know a few things. But Mike, you have to promise me to keep this to yourself. If Donna finds out…"
"Donna won't find out…" He wants to promise to keep it quiet but also knows that Harvey doesn't always do well with subtlety. Clearly his remarks to Harvey about Donna over the last few years haven't broken through so something more bold may be necessary.
"Well, I know Donna told Harvey that she wanted more."
"More what and when?"
"What exactly I don't know, but I doubt it was just the job. I came into her office the night he told her he was dating Paula and, I got to tell you, she looked so lost and hurt. I swear she was about to cry. Of course, she told me she was fine, but Mike, she wasn't. I really think that more meant between them, you know personally. And she told him that the night you got into the bar."
As if a light bulb turned on, the puzzle pieces were starting to make a picture. Harvey had mentioned recently that he had started dating Paula the night after he got into the bar. Mike had noticed Harvey making a bunch of clandestine phone calls and so jokingly called him out on it. And when Harvey told him he was seeing Paula, he asked Mike not to say anything to Rachel or Donna as he hadn't told Donna yet. Mike was a little surprised at that but now it makes sense. And then he found out that Paula was Harvey's therapist for his panic attacks.
"I can't believe I didn't see this before." Mike starts to say and just when Rachel was going to ask him what he meant, Louis pops his head in.
"Hey Mike, are you ready for the deposition? We should get going."
Mike looked at the time and saw it was later than he thought. He was preparing for the deposition when Paula called and with going right into the conversation with Rachel, he had lost track of time.
"Yeah, Louis. I'll meet you at the elevator." He hurriedly gathered his stuff and put it into his bag.
Swinging the bag over his shoulder, he leaned down and kissed Rachel on the cheek. "Sorry babe, got to go. We'll talk later ok? Love you."
"Yeah, love you too. See you later." Rachel answered, a little on the annoyed side. She really wanted to know what Mike meant. She could tell he figured something out just by his face and now she really wants to know what. Since she knew Mike wouldn't be back for quite a while, she went back to her office to work on her own cases.
About an hour after she went back to her office to work, Donna had swung by and Rachel could see on her face that Donna had had a day so she suggested they go get drinks.
"Yes please" was all Donna had to say so Rachel texted Mike that she would be heading out early for a ladies' night and would just see him at home.
Knowing that Rachel would be out, Mike decided to put in a few more hours at the office after returning from the deposition. He also knew that sometimes ladies' night led the ladies to have a few too many and Rachel knew that if that was the case, she should call Mike to swing by so that he can make sure they both get home ok. While she and Donna could take care of themselves just fine, Rachel also knew that there were enough horrible people in the world that might try to take advantage of them in their inebriated state and she would prefer a sober person help them both get home in one piece. Before all of the drama between Harvey and Donna, Harvey sometimes would get the call, but these days, it was all him. The office was closer to their destination for the night so he figured he could just work there for a while.
Harvey had swung by about an hour after Mike returned to the office just to say goodnight. "You leaving already Harvey? Wow, must be nice."
"It would be if it meant I could actually go home instead of going over to Callahan's. He wants to go over a couple of things and by a couple of things I mean I'll be lucky if I can leave by midnight."
"Ooo. Yeah, good luck with that. I say more like one a.m." To that Harvey rolls his eyes and heads out.
On his way to get coffee a bit later, Mike notices that a majority of the office has left for the night though there are a few burning the midnight oil like himself. After retrieving what will hopefully be his last coffee for the night, Mike set himself back down at his desk to hammer out a few more things on his case. By the time he gets done with that, ladies' night should be just about ready to wrap up and he can either head home or head to the bar where Rachel and Donna are at.
As he was starting his second paragraph, a shadow appeared near his door. He looks up and notices Paula there.
"Paula. Hi. Harvey already left for a client meeting." Though they haven't formally met, Harvey had shown Mike a picture of her earlier that week. He also made some very vague remarks about introducing them but gave no details as to where or when. Mike didn't know why she was here when Harvey wasn't going to be done for a few hours at the earliest and he really didn't want to get into a discussion with her, so he tried to end any conversation before it began.
"Harvey told me he would be late. I stopped by to speak with you actually if that is ok."
"Sure." He doesn't want to continue with her but he also doesn't want to be rude. "What did you want to speak about?"
"Well you were a little short on the phone when I called you earlier and I was wondering if I had done something." Paula asked.
"No, not at all." Mike responded though in his head his answer also included that she began dating Harvey when it was clearly a horrible idea, but he thought it best not to say that out loud. "I just don't have any ideas and a client walked in when you called so I had to wrap up quickly. Sorry if I was a little curt."
"No, I understand that my phone call was regarding a personal matter and you were at work so business trumps that. It was the way you spoke. I just got the sense there was something else. Maybe something else you wanted to say."
"Well, if you want to know the truth, I wanted to tell you that you called the wrong person. The best person to ask what Harvey might like would be Donna since she has known him for so many years." At the sound of Donna's name, Paula's lips scrunched up and she almost rolled her eyes. Clearly Donna was not someone she wanted to talk about. "But with that reaction, I think you already knew that and chose not to call her, hoping I might be able to help out instead. So I guess the real question would be why do you dislike Donna so much?"
"I don't dislike Donna."
"Yes. You do. That is clear. And if I were to take a guess it is because you feel threatened, isn't it." Mike started knowing that if he chose to continue with this conversation, it might end badly for his friendship with Harvey. But Paula decided to come here for answers and if she wanted them, that's what she'll get.
Paula sputtered trying to deny it but she couldn't because she was. Donna. She knew that if her and Harvey were ever going to have a chance, Donna would have to go. But how to make that happen was not easy as she knew if she voiced that wish now, Harvey would pick Donna. She hoped with time, the connection between Harvey and Donna would fade given his romantic relationship with her. Perhaps to the point that removing Donna from the equation would be easier or her relationship with Harvey would be so strong that removing Donna would be superfluous.
"Michael…"
"Mike, not Michael first off. And I see I hit the nail on the head. This will probably end up badly for me but I can't sit here quiet anymore. Your relationship with Harvey is, what is the word, unethical."
"I'll have you know that we did not start our relationship until over a year passed, well beyond the statutory guideline."
"No, that's not what I was getting at. Though focusing on the one year thing rather than the actual getting involved with a client is worrying. No, what I meant was you getting involved with your past client who had issues, and who frankly still has issues, with being honest about his feelings rather than bottling them up and ending up making rash decisions because of it."
"Did you ask Harvey, or have you ever wondered why he showed up all of a sudden to ask you out? Didn't that seem a bit strange?" Mike inquired.
"He told me he couldn't stop thinking of me and wanted to spend time with me. He was very romantic." She responds with a proud smile on her face.
"Yeah, Harvey has never lacked charm and the ability to know exactly what to do to get what he thinks he wants."
"What he thinks he wants?" Paula looks at Mike confused.
"Yeah, considering that the last time he sought you out he had lost Donna, did you even ask him what happened this time to bring him to you? I'm guessing you didn't. Well, what you would've found out if you had asked is that Donna asked for more the day before Harvey decided to take control and become managing partner of the firm."
"More what?" Paula asked while also trying to remember the conversation she had with Harvey the day he approached her on the street.
"That is something you would have to ask Donna, but seeing as how you won't do that . . . . My guess is that Harvey didn't know what more meant either and got scared and anxious. And the last time he got that scared and anxious regarding Donna, he started having panic attacks and needed medication to help make that and his world go away."
Mike's choice of words made Paula's blood go cold. Harvey himself told her that she made the world go away. Was he using her as medication to quell his anxiety about Donna.
Though that probably was enough to get Paula thinking, Mike was on a roll and she was here so what the hell.
"Obviously I don't know what happened in his sessions with you, but I wonder. He starts having panic attacks when Donna left him professionally. A secretary, why should that cause someone to have panic attacks, unless there is more to it. More to Harvey and Donna. But you didn't delve into that did you? Harvey clearly had other issues. I am aware of his relationship with his family."
"Yes. We worked on that. I helped him get to a point of repairing his relationship with his mother. He told me so himself. That I was the one that got him to go see her."
"No, that was actually Donna. He hadn't even thought of it until Donna basically sat him down and told him it was time to face his mother. For good or for bad. Without Donna, I don't know if he would have ever had the courage to go to Boston, let alone try to talk and forgive her."
"But you never delved into his issues with Donna did you? Never got to the core of why her leaving led to him having panic attacks. Maybe you hoped that by not dealing with his biggest issue, he might continue seeing you." Paula's jaw drops minutely but enough for Mike to catch. And he pounces. Yeah, he's going all in.
"I think I hit upon something, right? Let me guess, he plied on the charm in his sessions to get what he wanted. Probably the medication at first, right? Then, maybe to deflect off of talking about things he didn't want to talk about. Namely, Donna. Yeah, he does that. He reads people, kind of like Donna, and then uses what he sees to get what he wants. Handy tool in poker, don't you think? And let me see if I have this one. His charms started sinking in, didn't they? You liked him coming to see you and the longer you didn't actually deal with the real reason he was having attacks, the longer he would stay."
"And then the minute Donna came back to him, his panic attacks just magically stopped, but she wasn't an issue? Really, c'mon. That's ridiculous. And I'm guessing that was about the time he stopped seeing you completely. I mean as a client. Seems like Donna helped with his issues more than you did."
Paula has been sitting quietly as Mike continued on. "Well you're just a fraud so I don't have to sit here and listen to you."
"One, you came to me so I didn't make you do anything. Two, was a fraud. In case you weren't aware I am a fully and legally licensed attorney. And three, I've read every psych book there is so I probably know a lot more than you think. But, I also know you know I'm right."
"I think when he first approached you were hoping that he would restart his sessions so you could spend time together, but when he asked you out, well that just fell right into your own fantasies, didn't it? I think you know this relationship is no good and isn't going to last and I think you know Harvey knows it too. Why else would he struggle to tell Donna about it? Why has he not brought you to any firm functions? We've had plenty in the past few weeks where it would have been easy to bring you and show you off as his girlfriend. He's never been afraid to bring other ladies to those things in the past."
Paula swallows loudly. She got a bad feeling when Harvey seemed so reluctant to tell Donna. Why would it matter? And why hasn't he brought her to meet his work colleagues. The answer was staring her right in the face. Harvey didn't want to tell Donna or bring Paula to functions because it would hurt Donna and he never wanted to hurt her. That's the last thing he would ever do, even though it was exactly what he had done by dating her.
"And while I am all for Harvey being in a serious relationship, I want to see him happy. And he isn't happy. Not by a long shot. He is terrified. Terrified of losing Donna and you are the means of getting him through it. Basically, you are his anxiety medication. And you seem like a smart person so I think you've known this all along. Harvey's not the only one in denial is her? Ironic, don't you think?" Mike put into words Paula's exact thoughts and fears which had arisen during this conversation.
"So what you're saying is I am the unfortunate soul who got caught in their crossfire?" Paula asks.
"No. You didn't get caught. You intentionally put yourself there. You've known about Harvey's unresolved issues with Donna since he started being your patient." Mike answers, putting a subtle (ok, not so subtle emphasis on "your patient" so as to remind Paula exactly how she met Harvey.)
"If you even think about trying to play the victim here, you're more in denial than I thought. Harvey was your patient. He became your patient after Donna, his secretary, left him. He had panic attacks because Donna left him which he came to use, as your patient. He needed medication, which as your patient you prescribed him. You had therapy sessions as he was your patient about his issues."
"And I know Donna came to see you at some point when Harvey was your patient. So my guess is you probably figured out that she had feelings for Harvey herself."
"I mean when he approached you to ask you out, I think if you had simply asked him about Donna, you would've seen it. The man does have an impeccable poker face. Good luck knowing what he is thinking. Except when it comes to Donna. He is clear as day when it comes to her. That's why he and you steer clear of anything related to her. Why else would he have such a problem with telling her he is seeing you. He knows he can't hide when it comes to her. I mean he had made some really poor decisions if Donna is threatened in any way. He can't think rationally when she is at risk and when he is at risk of losing her. And I think when she told him she wanted more, he thought he was going to lose her and well. . . " Mike paused letting the implication of his last thought for Paula to figure out.
"And you? You are trying to stay fifty miles away from her if you can. Maybe because she can read you. Maybe you know that if it came down to it, he would choose her over you. Maybe because you know Harvey's heart belongs to her and probably has since they met but he is terrified of screwing it up and losing her. But what do I know, I'm just a fraud, right?"
"So no Paula, I don't think I can help you with getting something special for Harvey. And looking at the time, I need to be somewhere so I will wish you a good night."
Mike's dismissal allows Paula to leave his office without saying a word, not knowing if she could put together a fully understandable sentence at the moment. She is in a bit of a daze as she walks to the elevator, so much information is rolling around in her brain at the moment. She can't help but ask herself if she has been so blind these past couple of months. That she couldn't or didn't want to see that Harvey, while he consciously said he wanted a romantic relationship with her, subconsciously he was only using her as a balm to avoid the pain of having to actually face his feelings for Donna and potentially losing her. Has she been that blind.
While Paula is pondering her life and her life choices over the last couple of months and probably over the last couple of years on her way down to the lobby, Mike remained in his office for a few minutes to allow her to leave and hopefully not run into her on his own way out. He checked his cell phone and saw no messages or missed calls. Just to be safe, he calls Rachel to see if he should head towards the bar.
"No. I think we should be fine tonight honey. We are just about to head out ourselves and both of us are fine. We did more talking than drinking tonight actually." Rachel lets him know.
"Ok. I'll see you at home." He wants to tell her more about his conversation but since she was with Donna, he didn't want to get into it. He knows Harvey is going to be pissed but frankly, getting all this out with Paula was easier than it would be with Harvey. He knew Harvey would shut down the minute he started to dissect his relationship with Paula, let alone with Donna. No, he hoped that perhaps Paula heard what he told her and will have a long overdue conversation with Harvey about their relationship and future.
After waiting enough time for Paula to leave the building, Mike starts on his way out and on his way home. He has his own long conversation to have with Rachel to go over what happened. That way she wouldn't get blind-sided in case Harvey goes to her. And perhaps Rachel can figure out what, if anything, to tell Donna.
While he is not looking forward to his next meeting with Harvey, Mike knows that he would rather risk Harvey's wrath than see him continue on in a relationship that is unhealthy for all involved and most importantly was not making him happy. And after finding happiness with Rachel, his friend deserves some of his own. Happiness that has been in front of his face for over a decade. Hopefully it won't take another decade for Harvey to see that.