Author's note: Assumes everyone got through the current arc unscathed, Kazuma and Yukine know a God's Greatest Secret, and Kazuma and Bishamon are in a romantic relationship. Note: the original fic was a collection of 97 drabbles, which I've combined into chapters here.
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They followed the apartment manager as he gave them a tour of the unit.
"We have here your standard kitchen area, with gas stove and refrigerator. The dining area here, the balcony. This is the living area, and of course, the bedroom."
The apartment manager slid open the door to the bedroom, showing them. "Six tatami mats. Balcony. Storage area. All and all a good place for a young couple like yourselves to live in."
"And how far away is this from the nearest shrine?" Bishamon asked.
"Why, Tenjin Sugawara no Michizane's shrine is just two blocks walking distance. But more importantly the trains are only a block away," the manager said.
"Thank you," Bishamon said, smiling. "Is it okay if we take a moment to discuss things?"
"Of course. I'll be at my office if you want to sign."
xXx
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"Veena, remind me again why you want to get an apartment?"
"Well for privacy, of course." She opened the fridge, then closed it. "Also, I thought you might enjoy living with me as a human."
"What about phantoms?" Kazuma said.
"Well, Kofuku-dono does well enough living on the Near Shore, I understand Daikoku uses a borderline to protect her store. And Tenjin-dono's shrine is just a couple blocks away."
"But what about the others? As much as I'd like to stay with you here, Veena, we have a responsibility to the other shinki."
"They can reach you via cellular phone. And we can ascend to Takamagahara during work hours, Kazuma, there would be no difference except at the end of the day, instead of retiring to our room, we will come home to this apartment."
She stepped close, smiling and taking both his hands. "It will be like the old days," Bishamon said. "Except we will both be much happier."
Kazuma smiled shyly. "I'd like that," he said. She touched her forehead against his.
"I thought you would."
xXx
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"Veena wait, the handle is-"
Bishamon shrieked, then dropped the cast iron pan, which clattered loudly onto the floor.
"-hot," Kazuma said, and he deftly swooped down to pick it up with a folded dish towel.
"Kazuma, I thought the pans of this time had heat-resistant handles?"
"Not cast iron," Kazuma said.
It was nighttime, and they were cooking dinner. Or more accurately, Kazuma was cooking dinner while Bishamon watched. She watched as he breaded and fried tempura in large patches, deftly plucking out the sizzling pieces of shrimp with a pair of chopsticks and laying them out onto paper towels. "Remember when you first learned how to cook these?" Bishamon said. She popped a shrimp into her mouth while Kazuma laughed ruefully.
"I burned myself quite a lot," Kazuma said. He delicately set down another shrimp into the hot oil, the bubbles sizzling around it, agitated.
"How did you learn to cook?" Bishamon said. "There were other shinki in charge of the kitchens, I assume when you were with the others, you never had the opportunity."
"Uh, I snuck into peoples' houses," Kazuma said. He plucked out the shrimp and put in another batch. "There was a family who lived near the market I got our supplies. I followed the housewives and watched them."
Bishamon's mouth quirked. "That sounds like something you picked up from the Yatogami."
"Well it's not as if people could see us." He turned the shrimp over with his chopsticks.
Bishamon watched. He boiled a whole fish in water, then scooped it out, and used that water to blanch vegetables. He turned the broth into soup and added cubes of tofu. "You are just like a housewife," Bishamon said, marveling. Kazuma smiled.
They sat around a low-legged table on the floor, Kazuma stooping to put the dishes at the center before setting the plates.
"I can't remember the last time we ate alone like this," Bishamon said. She reached toward the center with her chopsticks, plucking out a piece of seaweed. "I wonder why we stopped?"
"You thought it best to let non-combatant shinki do the cooking," Kazuma said. "I was too busy managing the household."
"Ah yes, Kazuma, that's right. Thank you for reminding me."
There was a warm silence. They finished eating, and wordlessly Kazuma bent over to pick up the empty plates, moving to the sink to wash them. Bishamon joined him and dried off the wet plates with a towel, stacking them on the counter to put back in the cupboards.
"This is nice," Bishamon said. Kazuma smiled. "Is this what you had in mind when you talked about human marriage?"
"Pretty much." He rubbed a sponge over the rim of a glass. "One often finds comfort in the domestic."
"I see, having a home to return to." Bishamon took the glass and wiped it.
Bishamon stepped out onto the balcony. The night air was cool and crisp and she felt wholly at peace like this, looking out into the darkness from their shared apartment.
The glass door slid open. "Veena? I drew a bath."
"Oh yes, Kazuma, thank you," she said, and she stepped back inside.
xXx
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Kazuma was bounding down the metal steps to his apartment, walking over to check their mail, when he stopped and saw the shock of brown hair, green eyes and the familiar slouch of the man who murdered him two hundred years ago.
Kazuma took a step back, staring. The man turned.
"The fuck are you looking at?" his brother said.
Kazuma's hand clenched into a fist.
xXx
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Bishamon came come to find raised voices in the middle of their apartment.
"You fucking killed me!" Kazuma said, and Bishamon's eyes widened as she saw Kiyotsugu's brother shouting back at him.
"Dude, that was an accident!"
"How is strangling me a fucking accident?!"
"Hey! I'm not the one who ratted out his only brother to our father and screwed him over his inheritance!"
"Uh," Bishamon said, and they both turned.
"Whoa," his brother said. "Kiyotsugu, who's this chick?"
"That's my...master? Wife? I don't know what to call her yet." Bishamon raised an eyebrow.
"Kazuma," Bishamon said. "What is going on?"
Kazuma gestured. "My asshole brother lives in the unit below us."
"HEY. That was fucking two hundred years and like, three reincarnations ago, okay, I technically had nothing to do with it," his brother said.
"Why does he remember his past memories?" Bishamon said. Kazuma gestured helplessly.
"I used a spell on him," Kazuma said.
"Kazuma!"
"Wha- he's not a shinki! And it's not as if knowing a God's Greatest Secret would hurt him." He turned back to his brother and glared. "Not that he'd be a pure enough spirit to serve as a shinki in the first place."
"The spell can be reversed, correct?" Bishamon said. Kazuma hesitated. "Well?"
"I'm not entirely sure."
"Kazuma!"
"It was a knee-jerk reaction!" Kazuma said. Behind him, his brother snorted.
"Yeah, Kiyotsugu, way to be a hypocrite. Me strangling you was a knee-jerk reaction too."
"Can you just shut up?" Kazuma said. His brother spread his hands.
"Kazuma!" Bishamon said. "That was a forbidden spell! You were so worried about the Heavens coming down on us, spells like this can cause the Near Shore discord!"
"Yo, you tapping that?" his brother said. He threw a thumb at Bishamon. "'Cuz she's way hotter than that apprentice bitch you were so fixated over."
xXx
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"Kazuma! Don't you realize how dangerous this is? If your brother were to get into contact with any of the other shinki, he could let loose a God's Greatest Secret and shatter their names! What on earth were you thinking?"
"It's not a problem, I think I figured it out," Kazuma said. He turned. "Nii-san," Kazuma said, and he snapped his fingers. "Forget."
A flash. His brother blinked, then looked around.
"Uh, who are you, and what the fuck are you doing in my apartment?" his brother said. Kazuma shook his head.
"You're standing in our apartment, Nii-san," he said, and the spell broke again. His brother's eyes widened.
"Hey!" his brother said. "Kiyotsugu, you fucking asshole, what do you-"
"Forget."
"-what was I saying?"
"Remember."
"O-oi! Stop that!"
"Name suppression," Kazuma said. He pushed up his glasses. "Probably the only useful thing we got from the sorcerer."
xXx
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"Hey baby," his brother said to Bishamon as she walked up the stairs. "How 'bout you come over here and I let you sit on my face?"
("Kazuma can you restore your brother's memories? He is hitting on me again," Bishamon said. Kazuma shook his head.
"I'm pretty sure he'd hit on you regardless," Kazuma said.)
xXx
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"Hey lady. Wanna get a drink with me? After a few drinks I might actually wanna hit on you."
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"Whoa, look at how low-cut that dress is, asking for attention much? I don't normally pay attention to desperate chicks but this time I'll throw you a bone."
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"Y'know, despite how you look, you seem like you might actually be pretty smart."
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"I dunno, long hair is pretty gross, it gets all matted and tangled and stuff. But for you I'd be willing to make an exception."
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"You'd be prettier if you smiled!"
xXx
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"Kazuma your brother has gone from hitting on me to insulting me and quite frankly it's getting annoying," Bishamon said.
("Yo Kazuma. Y'know, I never liked culling humans, but for your asshole brother I don't mind making an exception," Yato said.)
xXx
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"Will you stop?" Kazuma said, after he turned back on his brother's memories. His brother glared.
"You took my inheritance. I'm gonna take your girl."
"She's not my 'girl,' she's my master and a war god and you are being annoying."
"Whoa, wait a minute, so you're not in a relationship? Dude that totally makes her free game!"
("Yatogami I might actually kill him," Bishamon said. Yato shook his head.)