The Houses Competition
House: Hufflepuff
Position: Head of House
Drabble/Standard: Standard
Prompt: (speech/multi-line) "No way!"/ "I'm in!"
Word Count: 1722
Warning for pure crackiness once more. I would like to take this time to thank everyone who beta read this for me. It truly means a lot that you would take the time to help me out like this. So, thank you very much and I hope you all enjoy The Bowler Hat Rumor.
I looked uneasily from Fred to George as we stood in our father's office at work. It was 'bring your children to work' day, and Father thought it would be a good idea to invite at least myself, Fred, and George to work with him. Show us what a job at the Ministry of Magic would look like.
"I heard that Minister Fudge is having an affair with his very own bowler hat," Fred said, looking up to make sure nobody would overhear us.
"Who told you that?" I asked, not wanting to believe that my idol was capable of such a thing as having an affair with a hat. "I'm sure whoever said it must be mistaken. Who would make up such a vicious lie about Minister Fudge?"
"One of the people down in the Auror office was talking about it in the elevator on the way up here," George answered, looking at me like I was quite daft for not hearing this exchange. "You didn't hear a word of the conversation, did you?"
"Father was speaking," I said, thinking my younger brother quite rude not to listen when they are being spoken to. "I was listening to him."
"Well, the man that was standing behind him and the woman who was talking to him was saying how Minister Fudge rarely goes anywhere without his bowler hat," Fred said, grinning like the Cheshire cat.
"They even went as far as to say that Minister Fudge sleeps with his hat," George finished for Fred. The two of them now had on matching grins, which usually wasn't a good sign for any sane person standing nearby.
"I don't like that look," I said, backing away from Fred and George as far as I could go. The two five-year-olds were scarier than anything when they both had their mischievous smiles on, and I knew very well what that meant. As their seven-year-old brother, I would have to follow their lead and make sure that they didn't get into too much trouble. "What are you two planning on doing?"
"We're planning on going up to the Minister's office and seeing if the rumors about him and his bowler hat are true," the twins said in unison, giggling like madmen.
"No way," I said, looking back towards the door our father had been led through not too long ago. I was hoping and praying that he'd leave the office soon and that would be the end of Fred and George's rumor exploring expedition. But I wasn't that lucky.
"I'm in!" George said, giggling and making his way to the door that left our father's department in the Ministry.
"Me too!" Fred said, making tracks to follow after George.
I let out a long-suffering sigh and wrote a quick note telling Father where we were going and left it for him on his desk. I then quickly made my way out into the hallway to see Fred and George's sneakers disappearing around the corner of the hallway. Today was going to be a very long day.
By the time I caught up with them, the twins had already pushed the button to call the elevator and were standing amongst the others waiting to get on. I walked over to their side and folded my arms over my chest with the same look that Mother usually uses with them on my face. Instead of making them 'fess up like I thought it would, it only served to make them giggle with glee.
"Don't be angry, Perce," Fred said, grinning at me happily as the elevator clanged open upon arriving.
"We're only trying to have fun and learn more about the Ministry of Magic," George finished for Fred, giving his twin a high-five as we boarded the elevator.
I wanted to point out that we should be shadowing our father and seeing if his was the right career for us to aspire to. But I could already see that anything I said would fall on deaf ears. We waded towards the back of the elevator and watched as it began to fill. For a fleeting second, I could have sworn that I saw my father looking into the elevator before the doors clanged shut in his face.
"We were almost caught," George whispered, confirming what I thought I had seen.
"That was a close one," Fred said, wiping invisible sweat off his brow and leaning against the back of the elevator.
We got off the elevator with a bunch of people who worked in the Minister's office. None of them happened to give two five-year-olds, and a seven-year-old much thought. They must have assumed that we belonged to someone in the bunch of them and that our parent would come and claim us. So we were pretty much left to wander on our own.
"Do you remember how we get to the Minister of Magic's office?" Fred asked George as though they'd been to the Minister's office before.
"I do believe we take a right here," George said, pointing to the right.
"Or we could find the door labeled Minister Fudge," I told them, pointing to the nameplate that graced the door in front of us.
"Um….yes," both of them said, walking to the door.
They were just about to pull the door open when I heard someone talking in the office. I motioned for them to stop so that I could listen and see who it was. Hadn't I heard that the Minister had a meeting with the Muggle Prime Minister in Downing Street or whatever their MInistry was called?
"Wha…"
'Shh!" I hissed, putting a finger to my lips. I then leaned close to the door so that the conversation was much louder, the twins following my lead for a change.
"My darling," the voice of the Minister of Magic said, "I can't believe that they found out about us so fast."
There was silence, or maybe the person who was with him was whispering. Because Minister Fudge certainly wasn't in a relationship with his bowler hat. That would just be so ridiculous it was even funny.
"But of course, my dear," Fudge said, sounding like he was standing next to us even though he was more than likely at his desk. "But you know what the voters would think if anything scandalous was to happen during the upcoming election. I would more than likely lose my job as Minister of Magic. Then I wouldn't be able to keep us both in the manner you are accustomed to. You enjoy all the fine things I can get you, don't you?"
I had never heard my mother and father talk to each other like this and was very confused by why anyone would speak this way to someone they loved. Shouldn't they be saying something lovey-dovey? Or doing like Bill and his current girlfriend tended to do with each other. Which was make kissy face. A thought that brought bile up the back of my throat.
"I've got to see who he's talking to," Fred said, looking up at me as though asking for my permission to do so.
"Me too!" George said, turning an identical look of pleading towards me.
Normally I would have told them that spying on someone wasn't a good thing to do. But then again, there had never in my entire life been a time where I was just as curious about something like this as the twins were. I felt like we all needed to know who the Minister of Magic was talking to in his office.
"Fine," I said, letting out a breath of annoyance and stepping back. That way, if anyone besides the Minister was in there, the first thing they'd see was the twins, and I could make it look like I was trying to stop them.
I looked down at my feet, my face flushing pink in embarrassment as I listened to the sound of the doorknob turning and the click of the door opening. The door wasn't open very much, just enough for our faces to peek through the crack and see. I could see Fred and George arraying themselves to take a look and moved forward to join them.
What we saw in that office made us wish we hadn't even come. The Minister had his bowler hat pressed firmly to his face and was licking it, or so it looked like to me.
"Ew!" Fred and George both shouted, trying to back away from the sight but backing straight into me, sending us all sprawling into the room when I fell forward. "What's he doing to his hat?"
The Minister thrust his hat onto his desk in front of us. His face now a bright red that would have made the Hogwarts Express jealous. He looked from me to Fred, to George, and then back to me as though trying to understand how three kids came to be in his office.
"Minister Fudge," Father said, raced towards us and the red-faced Minister of Magic like a man possessed. Which, in truth, he must have felt like that. His children were sprawled across the floor of the Minister's office. "I'm so sorry, sir! I just stepped away for a moment and didn't think that the children would come up here and bother you."
"Minister Fudge was doing something weird with his hat," Fred said, making the Minister's eyes bug out of his head.
"That's nice, Fred," Father said rather absentmindedly, helping us each off the floor. "We can talk more about it at home during dinner."
"I would rather you not," Minister Fudge said, looking towards the hat on his desk with love and affection for it. But also a hint of fear too.
I would later ask my father why the Minister of Magic would be afraid of someone finding him with his hat in his hands as we had. My father's answer was only that I would understand when I was older. But I do know this for sure. There was never another Take Your Child to Work Day at the Ministry of Magic after that fateful day. And there never would be until a very different Minister of Magic started the tradition up again. But that is a story for another time.
I hope you all enjoyed The Bowler Hat Rumor as much as I enjoyed writing it.