Fifteen days

by romioneB

Just an angsty/smutty one-shot fifteen days post- battle of Hogwarts

It was around midnight when I finally stomped up the stairs to my bedroom. My eyes were narrowed and my body tense as my rage once again got the best of me, my thoughts going to recent events now that I had nothing to distract myself from thinking.

Yet another day had passed seemingly just as fast as the fifteen before it since the battle had been over. Fifteen days since Voldemort had been defeated-fifteen days since Harry had died and then come back from the dead-fifteen days since Fred had died but not come back.

My heart clenched painfully, the jolt of once again remembering that my family was no longer whole, a piece of it forever gone.

I shook my head angrily. No. I didn't want to think of that- of him.

Instead, my thoughts turned to Hermione, and once again, anger started coursing through me, but that was okay-it was better than the crippling pain of thinking about Fred. Anything but that.

I made it there and just managed not to slam the door shut before I started pacing the room, my fists clenched.

Hermione.

What had happened between us? There had been the kiss of course, the moment where she had thrown herself at me as she had a million times before in my dreams, only this time, it had been real. Oh the things that I had felt in that moment- it had been absolute bliss. Just the thought that she might feel a fraction for me as I did for her had stunned me to my very core, my happiness from it all washing over me in a way that I had never before felt.

But- then there had also been...something else.

Everything was over. Voldemort was gone, Harry was safe, my family a grieving mess, me, too fucking numb to take in everything that had happened, so I had barely felt anything at all.

We had been standing in the Great Hall and Hermione grabbed my hand and started to pull me away. I had followed her, my feet mindlessly obeying as I put one front in the other. I hadn't had a clue as to where she was taking me or why, but I hadn't even tried to figure it out, my brain too fried to take in any new information. I suppose that I had been in shock- in shock and in denial. Not to mention exhausted as I couldn't even remember the last time I had slept for more than a few hours.

I don't even remember getting to the part of the castle that we ended up at, but the next thing I remember, she had pulled me into a small, dark broom closet, where we had subsequently shagged.

Or- I guess that's what had happened- I honestly I don't remember much. All I can remember is that it was dark and cramped in the closet, and Hermione was kissing me again, unbuttoning my trousers and pulling my cock out, stroking me until I was hard. She had then pulled one of her legs free from her jeans even though I wasn't quite sure how or when, because I don't even remember my lips leaving hers. I had been desperate, unable to stop moving and kissing the mouth that I had wanted to for quite literally forever. It felt better focusing on what was happening right in front of me rather than back in the Great Hall.

I vaguely remember her uttering the contraception spell before I lifted her up against the door, her legs going up to wrap tightly around my waist. I barely remembered what it had felt like when I had thrusted up into her for the first time. I do recall that I had loudly cried out, the feeling of her even better than I had anticipated. I also recall being thankful that she had already placed strong locking and silencing spells up, as there had been no way that I would have managed to do so given my state of mind at the time.

Hermione had cried out too- from pain or pleasure I wasn't quite sure, but at the time I hadn't even thought to ask. I remember starting to drill into her, sounds continually coming from both of us and our bodies as we met over and over again. Something had taken over me- I had needed this, needed her. It hadn't lasted long, and then we had fallen to the floor together, both of us crying.

With a loud grunt, I knocked a bunch of knick knacks off the top of my dresser so they scattered noisily to the floor.

Maybe that was why she hadn't tried anything more with me since then. Maybe she had changed her mind because I had been such an awful shag. In my defense though, I hadn't been thinking at all. I hadn't gotten the chance to see her, to touch her, to do things the way that I had always planned to if I ever got the chance.

Oh, but no. Although Hermione never said as much, I knew that she was no longer interested, at least in that way. The truth was plain to see, and while it had taken me a while to fully come to terms with it, I knew the truth now- and I was hurting because of it.

We hadn't kissed, much less anything else since the day of the battle. Granted, we have been pretty busy and there has been funeral after funeral to attend, each one harder to stomach than the last.

I hadn't even been able to cry at any of them, including Fred's.

What the fuck was wrong with me? I hadn't even cried at my own brother's funeral- what kind of person did that make me? I scoffed. A shite one.

The truth though, I had to admit, was that it was just easier to be angry. It was also what I was best at, holding onto that anger until it became a festering wound until it started tearing up my insides.

Fuck Voldemort.

Fuck this whole war.

Fuck Hermi-No, it wasn't her fault, it was mine.

Back to Hermione. Where did that leave us? We hadn't talked at all about anything that had happened, and she hadn't tried to make any more moves, nothing that would alert me to the fact that I was anything more than Ron Weasley, her friend.

Outward appearances, she had been great. She had been there for me from sun up til sundown and had been as supportive as she could be. She was with me every day. She was constantly holding my hand, asking me if I was okay, checking on me every bloody second. Practically smothering me in kindness. She was even getting me to eat and drink when I wasn't motivated to do so.

Maybe I did need those things, but I needed more from her as well. I needed her.

And I don't just mean sexually either, it certainly went deeper than that for me. I knew that I was in love with her, and even though I hadn't felt very 'lovey' towards her lately, I knew that my feelings hadn't changed.

She should have had the decency of letting me down gently though, I think that at the very least that I deserve that. Of course, we hadn't really been alone since we've left Hogwarts, but I blame that on her. She could have pulled me away to make her feelings known, to show me that I meant something to her, or that I didn't. But she hadn't.

The fact of the matter was, that I had been a fool to concede that she felt the same way about me as I felt about her. The shag had most definitely been a pity shag, I was sure of it. Fred was dead and she probably thought that sex would make me feel better. And it had- at least for a moment. But it had also confused the hell out of me and just left me wanting more.

The kiss though, at first I could have sworn that was different, that it had meant something, even though I now knew it didn't. The way that she had thrown herself at me had made me think that I was worth something, or at least worth something to her.

But obviously it too had just been a spur of the moment thing- meaningless.

Yes, I knew that Hermione cared for me, of course I did. After all of these years I'd be stupid to think otherwise. However, there was a clear line between a friendship and a romantic relationship- a line that I maybe teetered on, but definitely didn't cross.

Dejected, I sat down heavily on the side of my bed, grabbing a pillow to prop up my elbows before putting my head in my hands.

Maybe part of the reason she had been sticking so close to me since we had returned to The Burrow was due to guilt. Maybe she felt guilty and regretted everything that had happened between us and she was just trying to wordlessly make it crystal clear to me that we were friends- friends and nothing more.

My thoughts were interrupted by a small knock on the door. Harry had fallen asleep in the sitting room earlier, and had been out cold when I had left him there. I figured that I wouldn't be seeing him until morning and I had thrown a blanket over him, unwilling to wake him. I expected him to be the one to walk in but to my surprise, when I ignored the knock, the door opened and it was Hermione. She closed and locked the door behind her.

I didn't move, just sat there and stared at her, wondering why she was there and what she could possibly want at this hour. I had suspected that she was still having nightmares, even though she had denied it. Her face showed her lack of sleep and as much as I wanted to help her, she had been adamant that she could take care of herself so I had left the subject alone, not having the energy to push the issue.

She met my eyes as she slowly walked towards me in the dark, her face wary. My eyes raked down her body. She was wearing a cute little silk pyjama set, a small button-down top with shorts. I clenched my jaw. Was she just coming up here to taunt me? To show me what I couldn't have?

"Ron?" she started hesitantly. "I thought you'd be asleep but I heard-"

"You just had to come check on me like I'm an incompetent child who is unable to take care of hisself?" I asked, unable to keep a little bit of venom out of my voice.

She seemed surprised by my cold tone, but recovered quickly. She walked all the way over and sat on top of Harry's camp bed as she studied me, saying nothing as she bit her lip.

The fact that we were gloriously alone in the middle of the night,

coupled with the way that she was biting her lip, instantly made my body react to her, my cock turning rock hard in a matter of seconds.

Although still fuming, I was also brimming with lust for her. I tried not to whimper as we stared at each other, the smell of her intoxicating and making it even harder to hold myself back. Not that I would ever force myself on her of course, but resisting this temptation would be excruciating, and I knew that. Thankful that my pillow had already been in my lap. I pushed it down with my hands, needing some sort of friction before I went barmy.

"Maybe you should leave," I said, in between gritted teeth.

She looked hurt. Hurt and confused. "Why Ron? I just got here and I wanted to talk. You weren't even sleeping and-"

"Just s'not a good idea," I interrupted, my jaw still tightly clenched.

I was feeling so much at the moment that I could hardly focus on a single emotion or action that I wanted to make because of said emotions.

I wanted to grab Hermione and pull her to me- to rip her clothes off and fuck her into the mattress, but I knew that I couldn't.

I wanted to start punching the wall, or punch something while screaming out in frustration, but I knew that I couldn't do that either.

And the worst one was that I wanted to burst into tears, but of course I refused to do that, especially in front of her.

"Ron," she started again, ignoring my earlier attempt to get her to leave. "I've been- I've been really worried about you lately."

I scoffed. "Why Hermione? Why waste your precious headspace on me?" I spit out.

She recoiled. Although I had been feeling the anger, I hadn't yet let her see very much of it. Mostly, she had seen me being quiet, sulking- I hadn't quite snapped at her until now.

"Be-because Ron-what?" she sputtered, clearly not knowing what to say back to me.

"Well- you don't have to anymore Hermione. I can take care of myself. I don't need you," I lied, my voice starting to break.

I watched as her jaw quivered just a little bit. "But I need you," she said softly, and hearing her it got even harder to hold my tears at bay, my heart breaking at the sight of her, along with the words she had just said.

I shook my head, still not able to believe this. "No Hermione, there are a lot of others, some in this very house that would be better suited to help you. I'm not the person you need."

"You are," she insisted firmly. "You're not only the person that I need, you are also the person that I want-you always have been."

Unwilling to say anything to this, I just shook my head at her.

She sighed, sliding off of the bed to kneel in front of me, putting her small hands on my knees. Even through my pyjama bottoms, I could feel how small and soft they were and I felt my heart start beating faster, my breaths becoming labored. Everything in me wanted to grab her crush her lips with mine, to make her mine again. Hell even just to hold her to me as I cried, but I resisted.

"You're holding everything in Ron," she soothed, her hands now lightly rubbing my thighs. "I've been trying to be there for you, to wait for you, but you've only gotten worse and- and I don't know what else to do for you," she choked out.

I looked away from her face, the sight of her tears making me want to lose it, but I managed to hold on, focusing on my anger instead.

"I don't need another pity fuck Hermione," I said angrily, even though the thought of that made me want to groan with want.

"Pity-what?" I heard her say incredulously. I still wasn't looking at her, but by her voice I could tell that a look of disbelief would be on her face.

"Yeah," I said flatly, biting the inside of my cheek until I tasted blood.

"You think that I-that I pulled you into that closet, out of pity?" she said, in the same tone of voice she had had before, along with maybe some realization in there as well. I finally looked at her, her face scrunched up in what looked like pain."Ron- I wouldn't do that! What have you been-? Is that why you-?" she stopped, putting her face in her hands.

I allowed myself to gaze at her for just another moment before looking away again. "I thought that maybe the kiss meant something though," I said quietly. "But I was wrong."

I heard her sniff. "Of course it meant something Ron, how could you think that it didn't?" She reached up, her small hands cupping my face, firmly pulling it up and making me look at her. "Ron. It meant something," she said, her voice emotional as she stared hard at me, conveying that she was telling me the truth.

A little flicker of hope sparked in my otherwise stone cold chest. Maybe I did mean something to her after all. For some reason that little spark of hope lit up all of my insides, igniting everything that I had been holding in since I had been home.

The pain was staggering. My hands wildly clutching my chest as if would quell the pain some but it did nothing, the feelings growing even stronger as the seconds passed by. I barely even noticed Hermione, holding me tightly to her as I practically crumpled in her arms.

I had almost lost her.

I had almost lost Harry.

My family-broken.

Other families-broken.

All those people, dead.

Tonks and Lupin, dead.

Fred.

I wasn't sure how long it took, but when I finally came back to myself I was laying back on my bed, Hermione's arms around my head, my face nuzzled into her neck and collarbone. I took in a long deep shaky breath. I had forgotten that my lungs could even take in so much air, my chest feeling lighter than it had been for months.

"Thank you," I mumbled, not knowing what else to say to her.

The anger that I had previously felt was completely gone, replaced by sadness, but there was also the prospect of moving forward. Not forgetting, but learning to live with it all.

Reaching my long arm out and over her body, I reached under my pillow for my wand, quickly uttering a spell to clear my sinuses to make it easier to breathe.

Hermione still said nothing, her hands running slowly through my hair. I tightened my grip on her, her close proximity awakening my body once again. I turned my face back into her, inhaling even more of her before I softly kissed the skin of her collarbone, not sure if I was allowed to or not and a little scared that I was doing the wrong thing. Her hands stopped moving, and her body tensed up, but she didn't move away any.

I moved forward, kissing her again a little lower, hearing her emit a small gasp that didn't sound as if it were unpleasant. "Is this okay?" I mumbled, moving just a bit lower and kissing her again. I could feel her body starting to shake and I hoped that it was a good thing.

"Yes, it's okay," she said breathlessly.

I scooted back a bit, my hands going in between our bodies to unbutton the first small button of her pyjama top, planting a kiss there as well as it popped open. "Can I?" I asked.

I felt as she nodded her head. "Yes. Of course."

I continued my way down, opening the buttons slowly, planting kisses straight down the middle of her body. Even though I wanted to move faster, desperately wanted to just rip all of her clothes off and have my way with her-this time I wanted to take my time, to cherish her as she deserved. When I got to where I was in between her tits, I realized that she wasn't wearing a bra. I knew that if I moved my mouth over just a bit to either side, my lips would come into contact with those shapes that I had only observed through her clothes for years, always wanted to touch, yet never had.

I forced myself to continue down my original path though, until I was down at the bottom of her belly, my chin skimming the top of her bottoms as I popped open the last button. I paused a few moments before finally fully opening her top, baring her to me for the first time.

Oh to say that the sight of a near topless Hermione was going to do me in. I could hardly stand the amount of desire that I felt as I leaned forward and took a nipple into my mouth, unable to stop myself. Her back arched up as she gasped, her thigh moving up to rub against my erection, making me groan and push it further into her, sucking her even harder.

She gasped again, and I popped her nipple out of my mouth, moving to the other one and giving it the same treatment as Hermione writhed underneath me.

"I love you," she gasped out, her fingers deliciously digging into my scalp.

My head immediately snapped up, my eyes meeting hers.

"Are you serious?" I asked incredulously. "You're not just-saying things in the heat of the moment right?" I asked, desperately hoping that wasn't the case, not sure I would be able to handle that if it were.

"No," she shook her head, a smile forming on her face. "I mean- yes, I'm serious. And no, I didn't just say it in the heat of the mome-"

My lips stopped her from finishing her sentence, crashing down onto hers and causing her to let out a sound of surprise. I pushed my body down into her, wanting to be as close to her as humanly possible. She didn't seem to mind, her lips kissing me back just as eagerly, her body lifting and pushing back against mine, as if she wanted to merge with me.

Her profession of love had pushed me again into a frenzy, my need for her taking just about every piece of my sanity, and I barely managed to slow down and pull my mouth away from hers, my breaths ragged.

"I love you too- so much. And I want-to do this right," I managed to get out, my face still inches from hers.

I watched her brown eyes slowly open, looking into mine, a smile forming on her face. She gave me a slow nod, seemingly giving me permission to do whatever I wanted, and however I wanted to as well.

My hands crept up behind her back, gently pulling her up into a sitting position as I leaned back myself. I slid her pyjama top off of her arms, removing it completely before I laid her back down. Her hands came up to start pulling my shirt off of my head, and I helped her until I, too, was bare from the waist up.

I leaned back over her, finding her lips again, my tongue swirling slowly with hers, savoring both the moment and the taste of her. Without pulling away, I reached down and hooked my fingers into the waistband of her shorts and knickers before starting pulling them down, her hips lifting to help. Once they were off, I leaned back over her, our kiss never being broken. I balanced my weight onto one of my elbows before gingerly taking my other hand and sliding it between her legs, groaning at the warm wetness I felt.

Lavender had let me rub her on the outside of her knickers, but I had never gone underneath. Touching Hermione now, I had no idea what I was doing, but was pleased that she seemed to be liking it by the noises she was making.

I lightly rubbed her, her hips moving up and down as she slid against my fingers. Experimentally, I stuck a finger out, pushing it inside of her silky heat.

"Merlin fuck," I muttered, amazed that my cock had even been able to fit inside of her.

This of course, caused her to gasp, so I pulled it out and pushed it back in, being as gentle as I could.

"Ron- I need you to-" she whimpered, reaching down and grabbing my hand.

I let her take complete control of my hand, letting her pull my finger out of her body before using it to rub light circles right above where my finger had just been.

Of course, I thought. I knew about this. Well- kind of. I knew from dorm room talk that birds had what Seamus called a 'button' and if you messed around with it right, it made them come. I paid attention to what Hermione was doing, hoping to learn quickly so I could do it on my own. Before long, I told her that she could let go and I got it, and she pulled her own hand away, leaving me to do it myself. Overcome with an idea, I pulled away from her mouth.

"I'm going to try something, ok?" I asked, my finger still circling her, her breathing picking up and letting me know that she was getting closer.

Hermione nodded, but her eyes widened when I made my way down her body before settling my head in between her legs. My finger hadn't stopped yet, and I looked up at her, seeking her permission.

"Ohgod," she said breathlessly as she stared back at me before she threw her head back down onto the pillow.

Taking that as a sign to continue on, I quickly replaced my finger with my tongue, eliciting a loud squeal of delight from Hermione. I threw one of my arms over her hips to help hold her still as I continued, feeling positive by her noises that I was doing things right.

Within half a minute, Hermione was crying out, her body spasming and bucking, and I was not willing to stop until I was sure that she was done.

When she was, I sat back, getting my own breath back. "Bloody hell," I mumbled, amazed that I, Ron Weasley, had just made Hermione come.

Before I could think about it too much longer though, Hermione was up and practically tackling me, her lips on mine again. Straddling me, she rubbed herself against my still-trapped cock, causing my eyes to roll up into the back of my head. She quickly leaned back, removing the rest of my clothes from my body with my help before straddling me once again.

Entranced, I watched as she wrapped her small hand around my cock. It was quite possibly the biggest that I had ever seen it, the fullness of it making me positively ache with want for her. Slowly, she moved her hand up and down on it, making me hiss.

Apparently she took this as her cue to grab my wand and quickly utter the contraception charm on us both before sitting up and lowering herself onto me, both of us making a loud noise of fulfillment as her body miraculously took in all of me. Slowly, she started to move up and down, making small gasps and whimpers as she did so.

As incredible as it felt; as she felt, she was moving much too slow for what I needed right now. With a growl, I grasped her hips, twirling us both around until she was underneath me. I pulled almost all the way out of her before slamming my hips forward, burying myself inside of her again, the feeling of it so fucking incredible that I couldn't help but cry out as she did the same.

Over and over I pulled out of her, only to push myself back in the very next second, not willing to not be inside of her for very long at all. Hermione was holding onto my shoulders, her nails digging into my skin, only making the whole experience feel even better.

"Ron-" she gasped, "I'm almost-" she stopped talking, throwing her head back as she screamed, the sight of it along with the way her muscles were now squeezing me caused me to almost blackout with the intensity of my own orgasm as I followed mere seconds later.

I barely managed to throw myself to the side in order not to crush her with my body that now felt like it was made of lead.

"Fuck," I muttered, my breath coming out fast right onto her neck as she turned to hold onto my head.

"Yeah," I heard her agree, her breaths too, coming out ragged.

Slowly, I leaned back and scooted up until we were nose to nose. "Hermione Granger. Did you just swear?" I asked, teasing her.

She shook her head, her face serious. "I believe that I said 'yeah', so, no Ronald, I did not swear."

"It was close enough," I replied, playfully rubbing my nose against hers, eliciting a smile.

Her hand came up to softly caress my jawline, the scratchy stubble on my skin making a slight noise as she rubbed against it. My eyes instinctively closed at the action and I unexpectedly found myself fighting back tears.

"Is this real? Or is this just some amazing dream that I'm going to wake up from and die a bit inside when I realize that it didn't really happen?" I rasped out, my voice weak. I opened my eyes to look at her and saw her concern and her love for me in her expression, the sight nearly taking my breath away.

"It's real Ron. Not only that, it's permanent. Unless you blatantly don't want me anymore, I am here for you. I want you. I always have and I'm positive that I always will."

My hand wrapped around the back of her head and pulled her into a deep kiss. "I love you," I mumbled, before kissing her again as she responded eagerly.

My body, as if it had a mind of its own, sprung back to life and I scooted closer to her. She gasped as she felt me against her, probably startled that I was already ready to go so soon after the first time.

"We're going to have a problem," she said, as her lips started trailing down my neck.

"Yeah? What's that?" I asked, struggling to pay attention to her words rather than her actions.

"If you keep it up like this-pun intended- then we are never going to get out of bed."

I grinned as I felt her smile against my skin, her mouth now at my collarbone as she started to suck gently.

"S'your fault," I mumbled. "But don't worry, I'm sure I will wear out...eventually."

I leaned up to watch her, her eyes on mine as she kissed her way down my body. I was too entranced watching that I realized her intentions only half a second before she reached her destination.

"Hermione, you don't have-" a strangled cry flew from me and abruptly stopped my words as she took me in her mouth. "Unnngggghhh," I gurgled, both the sight and the feeling of what was happening rendering me speechless.

Hermione popped off, looking at me concerned. "Is this okay? I'm not doing it wrong am I?" she asked, her face entirely too innocent looking considering what she had just been doing.

"No, no- You're-Merlin Hermione, you were doing just fine-I really-" I threw my head back in ecstasy as she again took me into her mouth after giving me a sly smile.

She was barely taking about half of my cock in, her hand wrapped around the base as she moved it up and down, the feeling quickly driving me to madness. As good as this was, I suddenly desired to do something that I had dreamed about doing for years. I firmly grasped her shoulders and pushed her off of me, her face confused as she stared at me.

"Turn around," I growled, my voice thick with desire.

Gulping, she nodded her head and turned around, her head turning to gaze at me once she had done what I had demanded of her. In less than a second, I was behind her, feeling her shudder as I poised myself where I wanted to be, desperately ready to take her again.

"Is this okay?" I asked gently, knowing that no matter what I may want, I wasn't going to do anything that she wasn't comfortable with.

She nodded her head, her body shuddering against mine as I leaned further into her, awaiting her answer. Her nod was all I needed as I once again filled her, letting out a groan as I did so. I saw Hermione's hands grasping at the sheets, pleasurable sounding moans coming out of her with every one of my thrusts.

I pounded into her, this new position allowing me to go impossibly deeper, the sounds of slapping skin spurring me on. I still couldn't believe that this was fucking happening. Years and years of want was finally coming to fruition and I felt that I would never feel satisfied ever again if I wasn't inside of her.

"Ron," she moaned, before letting out little breathless cries as I continued pulling her to me at a frenzied pace.

The sound of her saying my name like that caused me to start bucking wildly before I spilled myself into her for a second time that night. Once again, I could hardly hold myself up as I collapsed beside her, my lungs feeling as if they were now on fire with how little breath that I was getting.

"Mygod Ron," Hermione panted from my left. "You're-going to be-the death of me."

I barely managed a chuckle. "M'sorry love. I'm done for tonight. Honestly I think I'd do myself in if we decided to go for another round."

Hermione lightly kissed me before she leaned backwards and grabbed my wand from beneath my pillow. She uttered cleaning spells on us both before leaning into me, nuzzling into my waiting arms. My heart was still broken over everything that had happened and all that I had lost, but as far as Hermione was concerned, my heart had never felt as good or content.

It was a strange feeling to both be elated and incredibly sad at the same time, but I figured that it was just one of those things that you aren't meant to understand so I stopped trying.

"I love you," I murmured, already half asleep.

"I love you too," Hermione replied, sounding on the verge of sleep herself.

'Everything is going to be okay,' I thought, and for the first time, I believed it.