Run
OA had just placed his order when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He spun around and saw the last person he had expected to see. Maggie. He had just left her an hour ago. She told him she had dinner plans with Nestor and scurried off. He had gone home but found himself too wired and restless to stay cooped up in his apartment. He had changed into sweats and jogged the short blocks to his favorite burger joint.
Although he wasn't expecting to see her, it was a welcomed surprise. He couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face or the enthusiastic "hey," that tumbled from his lips despite him just seeing her an hour ago.
"What are you doing here?" he followed up with.
She shrugged, looking at the menu and the dirty floors…anywhere but his eyes. "I was starving," she finally said.
He squinted his eyes at her before he said, "wasn't that the point of dinner with Nestor?" he said, failing miserably to keep the intonation off of Nestor's name.
She opened her mouth to answer but the girl behind the counter returned with OA's order. She then looked at Maggie expectantly to take her order. Maggie took the out and moved closer to the counter while OA collected his meal. He posted at the door because he was not planning on letting her leave without her telling him what was wrong. She was definitely not okay. Maybe she and Nestor had a fight and she left dinner without eating?
He watched her small frame from behind and felt himself soften. Maybe he was being too pushy? Nothing good came from pushing Maggie that much he knew.
"I'll see you tomorrow," he said making her spin around to face him.
"Yeah, okay." she said but her eyes told another story altogether. The last thing it looked like she wanted to do was be alone.
"Or we could take this back to my mine?" he offered and she nodded with a small smile.
They waited another ten minutes for Maggie's order then left the burger joint together. They fell into a slow walk side by side. It was strange, no one spoke and there was no urge to fill the silence. OA hoped that his proximity alone would cheer her up. He thought about how she frequented his favorite burger joint more than he did. He had been the one to introduce her to it. After a long night of paper work and complaining about hunger pains he had taken her to only spot he knew opened past midnight in his neighborhood.
They had binged burgers and beer on his living room floor into the early hours of the morning. It was marked in his memory, permanently etched. All the laughing and joking they did. The way she had completely let her guard down and even her hair down. The way she looked at him in the low lighting the way her eyes would lower to his lips. He had seen another side of her that night. It felt like they had crossed a line without moving if that made any sense. They hadn't even touched. But a new level of intimacy was there.
It was only a week later she had dropped the bomb on him that she was going undercover.
He knew, or at least he suspected that she was running from what she felt that night. It was a clear indicator that he should forget about it. And he did.
Only when they reached the steps of his apartment did he steer his thoughts back to the present.
"You sure you don't want to come up?" he said and she shook her head.
She lowered herself unto the fourth step and he followed on the other side of the step.
"I could use the fresh air." she said. She still had that distant look in her eyes and he didn't like it. Every time he opened his mouth to press, he took a big bite of his burger to shut himself up. He had almost finished his food in five bites.
"I broke up with him," she blurted out. OA turned sharply to look at her. She had barely touched her food.
"Nestor?" he said even though he knew. But some part of him hidden deep within wanted to hear her say the words. It wouldn't be real till then.
"Mhm," she hummed into the night air, looking off into the ether.
"What'd he do?" OA asked.
She turned to him, meeting his eyes for the first time that night.
"What makes you think he did something? Maybe it was me." she said and he frowned in response.
"Maggie please, the only redeeming thing about Nestor was you." he said and her eyes fluttered before she looked away from him.
"He didn't do anything wrong…not really…any other woman would…I guess…" she muttered, more to herself than him. OA wasn't following either.
"Come on Mags, you can talk to me about anything." he said. At least he felt that way. She was the first person he wanted to talk to after Mona had broken up with him.
"Things felt different when we were undercover. Ever since we got back it hasn't felt the same."
OA understood that.
"He wanted to move in together." She said. OA's heart dropped into his stomach. He didn't realize they were that serious, or at least he hoped it wasn't.
"And you didn't?" OA said.
She shook her head slowly. "What does that say about me?" OA couldn't believe she was feeling guilty. She and that gigantic bleeding heart of hers. Most days it made him want to pull her into nearest dark corner and write poetry on her lips. Other days it was insufferable.
Through gritted teeth he said, "It means that it wasn't meant to be."
She wasn't fazed by his words and he could tell there was still a war within her mind.
"Maggie," he touched her arm and forced her to look at him. "You don't have to feel guilty for not wanting him."
"You never really liked him did you?" she said.
He shrugged. He figured yelling NO would be insensitive in the moment.
"I guess I wasn't ready to get back out there…maybe I pushed myself because…" she was back to muttering to herself. But this time OA heard her. And understood her. Had she gotten with Nestor so she wouldn't have to confront her feelings for him or was it all in his head?
"Because?" he said.
She shook her head while she wrapped up her burger.
"I should head home," she said abruptly.
He wanted to stop her. Force her to tell him that he wasn't crazy. That it wasn't just in his head. That they had something. Instead he wrapped up his own garbage and stuffed them back into the plastic bag they had come from.
"Yeah, I'll head up." he said but she was already walking away from him. Things were confusing as they ever were. But Maggie and Nestor were finished. He smiled.
A/N: I guess it can be seen as a sequel to Blindsided. Thanks for reading.