Author's Note: This will also have some unique pairings, so you must forgive my indulgences (though Jon and Dany are OTP when they finally meet). Also, Cat never attends the Red Wedding; Joffrey survives the Purple Wedding and marries Margaery, and when Dany arrives in KL the Lannisters and Tyrells are in an uneasy stalemate; Rodrik poisons Euron though Victarion is still on his way to Meereen with the dragon horn; Jaime is killed by the Brotherhood without Banners; (f)Aegon and Jon Con are infected with grayscale after meeting Tyrion and are staying in Essos; Kevan Lannister survives Varys's assassination attempt by killing Varys; Maester Aemon lives a little longer and he and Sam don't go to the Citadel but instead return shortly after Jon's resurrection.

I wrote this as a poem. I alternate between italics and bold to convey different speakers because it's hard to incorporate speaking tags. The words of main characters (Jon and Dany) are typically in bold, while the words of other characters are typically in italics.

Also, the meter of the poem is:

dada DUM da DUM da DUM da

dada DUM da DUM da DUM

Stannis lay cold, still, and lifeless
While a girl in flames did cry
As a priestess asked her red god
For Azor Ahai to rise

Then Shireen finally went silent
And Mel waited with hands clasped
For his eyes to open, all while
Out of sight a bastard gasped

In the chaos and confusion
That occurred when Jon Snow woke
Saw the traitors and the zealot
Get the gallows not the smoke

But if we don't burn them they'll rise
Satin wore a look of woe
And I hope they do, Jon stated
'Cause it's time the world should know

Then he marched straight to his princess
Who was always dressed in white
As she stroked the fur of Ghost, she
Was a lovely, lethal sight

I will give you twenty minutes
Take your weapons and leave now
I will hunt you down and steal you
But she laughed, Forgot your vows?

No my death released me, I'm free
I'm no brother, I'm no crow
I have got to save my sister
But it's you I want to know

As he stalked her through the woods his
Sense of smell, and hearing grew
And he wondered if his taste, too
Was enhanced, though he soon knew

When he lunged she screamed surprised, though
Somehow still put up a fight
But then soon he had her pinned down
With her hair, paled by moonlight

She still cursed and swore she'd kill him
That she'd geld him in their bed
But her cunt proved she was lying
As it welcomed him instead

In the morn, Jon said, Let's head back
for some breakfast and a fire
He was sore from bites and bruises
That he earned from his desire

Never thought a man could steal me
Rather I, bewitch, engulf
But I'm not sure I was so wrong
She then grinned, 'cause you're a wolf!

Wasn't me who bit and scratched and
Who was howling at the moon
Nor was I the only kneeler
Didn't think you'd change so soon

Val then punched him in the shoulder
But I almost did break free!
When you rode me like a horse or
When your legs were wrapped 'round me?

As they packed their things and headed
To the Wall to get some sleep
Both their doors were opened so each
Couldn't help but take a peak

Must've dreamed about your sister
Said her name a dozen times
She's the reason I was brought back
To avenge that bastard's crimes

And do you have family somewhere
Now that Dalla's passed away?
Val refused but then relented
Jon would take it to his grave

Mother said she was the sister
Of my father, yes it's true
But they had to keep it secret
They'd be killed if others knew

We're descended from some kneeler
Who was kind and was well-read
Never told his name to save him
Of course now, he's likely dead

And just then, Jon's raven landed
On a branch and spread its wings
Maybe Val is short for something
And you're from a line of—Kings!

As they readied to march south, Jon
Saw a welcomed, warming sight
Maester Aemon and his friend, Sam
Were returning at first light

Maester Aemon had a dream and
Made us turn around the ship
Though Sam's face turned pale when Jon told
What occurred during their trip

Maester Aemon wasn't shocked though
May an old man feel your face?
Moments later he was smiling
And then laughing without grace

You've gone mad? Jon asked the Maester
Who stopped laughing, When you're done
Send a raven 'cause you'll need us
You've a battle with someone

So you're leaving us? Edd asked him
Need to watch your back, he scowled
Bad things happen when you die, like
I am Lord Commander now

As they marched to take his home back
And to save his sister's life
Couldn't help but smile at those who
Chose to join him in this fight

There were wildlings there were giants
Brothers who still dressed in dark
The remainder of the King's men
Mountain clans who served House Stark

What the fuck did you and Val do?
Tormund asked with wiggled brow
Hasn't threatened you with gelding
I just heard her giggle loud

So the answer's in your question
And she'd miss it more than me
And I know that you're not whining
'Bout another's bit of glee?

Tormund made a face that Jon missed
Focused on what was ahead
An old man, frail girl and woman
Who possessed a look of dread

Well my name is Asha Greyjoy
Stannis captured me and then
We were joined by these two fleeing
Winterfell and Ramsay's sin

There was silence as Jon walked up
To the girl with frost-bit nose
You're not Arya so please tell me-
I'm so sorry I don't know!

"You are Arya Stark" they told me
Had to play along or die
But the things Ramsay did to me
Wish that I had never lied!

As he listened shocked and wide-eyed
Then relief spread 'cross his face
Though he may have died for nothing
He was glad his sister's safe

Well you're under my protection
Not a one will hurt you here
I know we weren't close back then, Jeyne
But I'm glad to have you near

She was hugged and kissed by Jon, then
Went with Val to go find food
Jon turned back to look at Theon
In a wildly different mood

Tell me why? was all he asked him
Theon stuttered, I don't know
You were treated like a brother
All the while you were our foe

I was always just an outcast
Well you weren't the only one
But while I chose honor, duty
You chose killing Starks for fun!

I did not kill Bran or Rickon!
Only 'cause they first escaped!
But you drove them from their home now
Rickon's dead, you'll share his fate

How'd you know? Asked Theon puzzled
I had feared for Bran the most
Bran and Arya are still living
I can feel their life through Ghost

Robb did love you like a brother
But because of you he's dead
What you did emboldened traitors
It's for him I'll take your head

Ramsay's made him pay thrice over!
Asha stepped between the two
Execution isn't justice
Oh I'm not sure that is true

I was killed for helping Freefolk
Saving Arya from her dread
While he murdered, but don't worry
I won't kick his severed head!

As he unsheathed Longclaw he asked
Final words to cleanse your sins?
Ramsay knows you're coming, watch out
For his hounds and mounted men

As he lay beside Val dreaming
Running through the woods towards home
He could sense another coming
Soon he wouldn't be alone

When the battle finally came the
Cavalry were taken out
Horses spooked by packs of wolves, it
Was a direwolf-led route

Then Jon's archers felled the stragglers
And the giants breached the door
Ramsay's hounds killed by Jon's sigil
But he knew he wanted more

They found Ramsay in the tower
That had been abandoned years
and a grin that came unbidden
At the sight of Ramsay's tears

In a minute those around them
Could no longer recognize
Ramsay's face, but Jon was careful
To not let that bastard die

Stood him up and whispered to him
You might say I hold a grudge
This will end the way it started
And Jon gave a little nudge

Houses Ryswell, Cerwyn, Glover
Dustin, Stout, Umber, and Locke
Gave excuses for the Boltons
Said they've always served House Stark

Wyman Manderly explained how
They'd been plotting the whole thing
How they'd sent Ser Davos to bring
Rickon home to serve as King

I'm afraid he won't have much luck
Jon explained with sorrowed eyes
Rickon's direwolf's still living
Though his body has long died

Bran and Arya are still living
Though I'm not sure Sansa's fate
But no doubt the pack, he grinned, will
Reunite 'fore it's too late

Manderly explained the battle
Between Stannis and the Freys
Manderly's and Ramsay's joined in
Though the Manderlys betrayed

In the end the Freys were slaughtered
Stannis fought bravely but fell
Rest escaped while Ramsay left with
Twenty men to Winterfell

He then poisoned Roose and Walda
Said I was a traitor, too
Kept the lords and ladies hostage
And our only hope was you!

Bael the Bard! 'ole Tormund broke in
As Mance patted Manderly
Just remember whose idea the
Snowmen were, Fat Tom he winked

Lady Dustin wore a strange look
It's like staring at a ghost
I've been told I look like Father
Maybe some, but not the most

Well I came to save my sister
But it turns out she's not here
Now it seems I've a new mission
See us through all our worst fears

Send a raven to all castles
Let them know the Starks return
Then invite the Northern lords to
See the tales of children burn

They were cuddling by the hearth, so
Very sweet despite their heft
White and gray resting together
It was like they'd never left

Jon then scratched Nymeria's head
Which she raised to look at him
Please come home I miss you so much
'Cross the sea a no-one grinned

Time for bed you've had a long day
Unless you're too tired, that is?
Jon then patted Val's round bottom
Never too tired for your kiss

Coming days Jon spent preparing
Everyone for what they'll see
Making peace between the factions
How to deal with the new Queen

Davos came and bore sad news that
His whole search had been in vain
Only saw a giant black wolf
Eating unicorn remains

Jon and Davos quickly found out
That they got along quite well
They distrusted Melisandre
And were sorry Stannis fell

Jon respected the advice that
Davos gave more than the lords'
But what Jon respected most was
What he did for Edric Storm

Maester Aemon, Sam, and Alys
Soon arrived in Winterfell
Alys had some news for Sigorn
That she couldn't wait to tell

Then came Maege and Galbart Glover
Who were joined by Howland Reed
Jon could sense their loyalty which
Was exactly what he'd need

As the weeks passed by Jon kept on
Giving orders night and day
"Lord Commander's" what they called him
As a jape, but all obeyed

Then a guard stopped Jon's discourse of
Iron Bank loans to buy grain
Lord Protector of the Vale's here
With his daughter named Alayne