Never judge a plant by its teeth
[Disclaimer: The movies and its characters don't belong to me. They belong to their rightful owners and I'm just borrowing them for this one-shot.
A/N: So I thought that Sulu's love for plants was never really mentioned in the AOS-movies and I really wanted to write something about his soft spot for them. Here it is! Please enjoy!
PS: Rating due to Bones and his adoration of cursing]
/Never judge a plant by its teeth/
It should have been a simple away mission for the crew members of the Enterprise. A small landing party had beamed onto the planet's surface to investigate the jungle-like environment, to find new creatures or plants or even technologies hidden somewhere.
The team had made the decision to go separate ways, forming two groups and leaving McCoy, Scotty and Sulu going one way and Uhura, Chekov and two other ensigns heading in the opposite direction. That way they hoped to be able to investigate a lot faster and way more efficiently.
Bones cursed loudly when he tripped and nearly fell because of a tree's root. Scotty was able to get a hold on his arm, keeping him upright.
"Careful now, doc. I do nae want to carry ye back to the meeting point", the Scotsman warned him, chuckling slightly and McCoy just rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, well, I'm not keen on it either, but this dam ground is full of these roots causing you to trip with every step ya take."
The doctor was even grumpier than usual since he had not wanted to go on this mission in first place, but Jim had somehow managed to convince him that he was needed down there.
"What if there are plants we can use to cure dangerous diseases", he'd said quite amazed by that thought himself.
'Why not go and search for it yourself, Jim?', he thought once again as they moved forward through the jungle. Bones had to admit that it looked quite stunning, a beautiful scenery. There was a small river, softly streaming along their path. The air was great, even better than earth' atmosphere and it was all very quiet and peaceful. Maybe they could go on shore leave here sometime-
McCoy's thoughts were interrupted by an unexpected touch at his foot.
'Come on, now. Not another root!'
He looked down at his feet and was shocked to see some kind of green noose slinging around his left leg, quickly tightening.
"Uhm, guys-"
Merely a few seconds passed and Bones was dangling in the air, not really aware of what had happened just now. He let out a frightened scream, surprised by the sudden movement upwards.
What was going on here?
He opened his eyes and was able to take a look around. Only then the doctor realized that it wasn't just him who was hanging in the air.
Next to him he found Scotty, a way bigger green sling wrapped around his torso. The engineer was obviously as shocked as him for he stared at Bones with wide eyes, apparently asking the other man for help. His arms were bound to his body and he could only move his legs and head freely.
Opposite of them Bones saw Sulu, the same noose around his torso as well, but he was able to move his arms at least. He looked surprised too but he didn't seem to be as shocked as the other men. Or he was hiding his fear pretty good.
"What's going on?", Scotty yelled and suddenly the ground beneath them moved, revealing something slowly rising to its full height.
McCoy couldn't believe it. Beneath them was something he could only describe as huge carnivorous plant. He remembered having one of these back at home because of the annoying amount of flies joining them every summer. It had always done a great job. Within days the amount had been reduced quite fast and he had finally gotten his peace back.
He wasn't too sure though if he'd like this plant, because apparently he and his crew mates would be the flies in this case.
"Is that a carnivorous plant?!", Scotty exclaimed, his voice pitched higher than usual due to the panic he was experiencing at the moment and suddenly yet another sling was wrapped around his mouth, shutting him up. He gave a few muffled yells from him and McCoy immediately got out his communicator. He had to call for help!
But the plant wasn't a big fan of his plan as it started swinging him around, causing the device to fall from his hands, hitting the ground and breaking apart.
"Shit!", Bones cursed. He was feeling sick from getting moved all around in the air and he nearly vomited when suddenly the movement stopped.
Bones used the calm moment to look at Sulu who was staring at the plant in amazement, somehow being way too calm for McCoy's liking.
"Sulu!"
"This plant is stunning! I've always heard of them but I didn't actually see one myself up until now."
Bones rose both of his eyebrows, staring at the man in disbelief.
"Stunning?! We're gonna end up as this plant's lunch if we don't do anything and you find it stunning? What the hell's wrong with ya?!"
Once again the plant moved him around and he stopped talking immediately. Okay... so no loud noises.
"It's only trying to protect itself, doctor. We violated its territory after all."
Bones rolled his eyes. Now that was some kind of reason! Maybe Sulu was right, but it didn't make their situation any better.
"Oh, now that's one hell of an argument. Next time someone violates my office without asking, I'll eat them too!"
If there would be a next time at all. McCoy felt himself getting lifted higher and suddenly he was dangling right above the plant's open mouth. He looked down into its gullet, stared at the sharp teeth all around its mouth. And he quickly closed his eyes, when his body was slowly lowered.
"I don't taste good. I don't taste good. I don't taste good!", the doctor exclaimed, getting louder and louder.
He could hear Scotty's muffled screams and he knew that he'd at least be missed by one person. Well, at least until the Scotsman would end up the same way as him.
So this was it. The end of Dr. Leonard Horatio McCoy. He had wished for a better way to die. At least something... more heroic? A tale people would tell his daughter and later on grandchildren. Being eaten by an oversized carnivorous plant? Not much of a story to tell anyone. At least the same story would be told about Scotty and Sulu. He wasn't alone. Other Star Fleet officers had failed miserably in the same way as he did. Now that was something, wasn't it?
He could already smell the bad breath of the plant when yet another unexpected thing happened. The plant stopped moving him. Why? What was holding it back? Was this some kind of torture? Was it going to leave him waiting and waiting until it finally feasted on him?
'Gosh, I hate my life! Even the last bit of it.'
A strange melody reached McCoys ears. It was soft and calm, reminding him of a lullaby. What-
He opened his eyes as he was lifted upwards once again and he couldn't believe what he saw.
Sulu was stroking the noose which was tied around him, humming a song, his eyes closed. And the plant... was humming along?
Moments later, Bones found himself back on the ground, the noose around his leg loosening and eventually giving him free. He blinked at the scenario playing out in front of him in disbelief.
Sulu was put down on the ground too and he walked towards the plant, putting one hand on its huge body, stroking it.
"It's okay. We're not here to hurt you. We'll leave and we won't come back, alright?", he mumbled softly and the plant seemed to be humming in a kind of agreement.
Bones felt a hand touching his arm and he looked up to find Scotty standing next to him, helping him get on his feet. The two officers stood next to each other and simply stared at Sulu and the plant, before slowly walking backwards, leaving the danger zone quietly.
They were soon followed by Sulu, who was giving the carnivorous plant a friendly goodbye, before joining them. The last thing they saw was the plant slowly moving back into the ground, as if it had never been there before.
Without another word the three of them walked towards the meeting point. Only there, McCoy was finally able to find his voice again.
"Uhm..." He scratched the back of his head awkwardly and cleared his throat, before adding: "... thanks, Mr. Sulu."
"I agree with the doctor. Thanks! Without ye we'd be plant food."
Sulu just smiled softly.
"No big deal. I was just doing my job. Getting us out of dangerous situations."
Scotty chuckled.
"But how did ye know that the melody would calm it down?", he asked and Sulu simply shrugged.
"I didn't. It's just the song I sing to my own plants aboard. It's... kind of a language, I guess."
McCoy sighed in relief, before saying: "Well, I guess the three of us will have to share a drink tonight and give a toast to that language of yours, Mr. Sulu."
They all laughed.
"I'd love to. Maybe I could teach you something about plants then, so that the next time you get into a situation like that, you'll stay calm and don't scream. Most plants hate these loud noises."
Bones once again scratched the back of his head.
"Yeah, about that... Could we... keep that between the three of us? Like... me screaming 'I don't taste good' and so on?"
Sulu and Scotty just laughed again.
"I guess we'll have to tell the Captain about the plant itself and what happened, but the whole story can be a secret."
Sulu winked at him and Bones gave him a grateful nod. It would be their own little secret. A story no one had to hear about. At least not until the next New Year's Eve party and a bunch of alcohol.