"Money. Some people say it's the root of all evil." Said a very familiar voice while a person picks up a few dirty bills off the ground near a dumpster. The man looks at the money for a few seconds till her turns his head to the left and smiles the biggest, stupidest smile ever. Next the man cashes in the money he found for some poker chips and slides it into a machine.
He then pulls the lever and watches as the three slots all land on dollar signs. With great joy he jumps into the air and throws his arms above his head. Just a second later a gunshot was heard and the man suddenly jerks to the right. His eyes covered in dollar signs and poker chips flying out of his head. He falls to the floor while the guy to his right watches in fright and shock.
The camera then pans to its right and stops on the man of the hour Handsome Jack. Holding a SMG in his hand with smoke coming out of the barrel. "Those guys are frickin' idiots!" He laughed. "Money rules! We all know it. How's it goin'? Handsome Jack here, your best friend." The late CEO carelessly tosses the gun over his shoulder and walks down the lane with the camera keeping ahead of him. "You know what sucks?" He rhetorically asked to the viewers. "Everything, all the time. There's wars, there's poors, and not enough fire in the six galaxies to burn it all down. That's why I built the ultimate getaway: THE HANDSOME JACKPOT!" He comes to a stop and gestures his arms to his sides and looks up at the post edited in logo. He then says you're welcome and winks at the camera.
While he said all of that the gun he threw seconds ago finally comes down and lands on someone's head. Causing them to be knocked out. A loader bot shows up a second later and starts dragging the person away.
The camera then cuts to an angle of a statue of Jack riding a pony and a gigantic blue 3D hologram of Jack's entire head and face looking down at those he deems inferior. "I, by myself and me alone with no one's help at all, combine Hyperion's most advanced space station engineering with the most OPULENT casino the galaxy has ever seen!" The camera continues to cut to more shots of the inside of the station. People walking about and mingling with each other. Lining the walls of the hallway are more Jack statues. "The only thing that's better looking than this station is ME. baby! And you're not gonna be able to look in ANY direction without seeing THIS handsome mug." It cut back to Jack gesture to everything built in his image and ended with him pointing at himself and smiling a smug smile.
It cuts again to him walking down the casino floor only for him to stop when realizing the camera was on him. He spits into his hands and has them run down his hair to fix any loose strands that might be out of place. When done he then says, "Spend your money in the lap of luxury, your every whim catered to by our automated staff of robots. Full service!" He quickly looks around and leans towards the camera and says with a knowing smile, "-I'm looking at you robo-perverts!" Just behind him a serve-bot heard him and tries to hide it's face with a arm and heads off.
The camera again cuts to a bunch of people in what appears to be a bar enjoying drinks and eating fancy food. "Stuff your fat, greasy mitt with caviar, like you know what that is, and let it hang open in wonder as you behold the GREATEST live entertainment money can buy! The Handsome Jackpot! Once you're here..." The camera zooms in on Handsome Jack standing his office close to the window. He presses his fingers together and finishes his sentence with a sinister grin. "...you're never gonna wanna leave."
The video suddenly comes to pause by Moxxi via the remote she's holding. "Jack's dead, but he left somethings behind." She states. The bar owner turns around to face the guests she has in her establishment. "I want that casino. Ready to bring down the house, sugars?" She asked with a wink. The guests in question are none other than the Vault Hunters. Zane, Moze, FL4K, Amara, and Kage.
I KNOW I PRETTY MUCH COPY N PASTED THE INTRO CUTSCENE. I DID PLAN ON ADDING MORE. LIKE WHAT'S BEEN HAPPENING SINCE THE DOWNFALL OF THE COV AND WHERE THE CHARACTERS ARE AT THIS POINT IN THE TIMELINE. BUT I KEPT HITTING ROAD BLOCKS AND FIGURED TO CUT MY LOSSES. THE REMAINING THREE DLCs WILL ALL START LIKE THIS. KINDA... I HAVE TO GET CREATIVE WITH BOUNYT OF BLOOD AND KRIEG'S DLC.