Booth was lying in his bed staring at the night celling. His girlfriend was right next to him sleeping peacefully. She was everything that one might want in a woman, beautiful, strong, funny, smart and easy to be with and she was with him and was not afraid being with him. Then why, God, oh why was he still feeling that this is all a mistake. He should have moved on by now, he should have been fine. Ever since Bones told him that she made a mistake rejecting him, Booth was consumed by the possibilities of what it would be like for them being a couple, he couldn't help it. He tried, really tried to keep his distance, it wasn't fair, he never wanted to hurt Bones just as she never wanted to hurt him, but they both did in the end. He fought this love for so long, ever since the Hoover incident, he went to war and she still wouldn't let him go. He was with a great woman, who he loved, or at least he thought he did, but nevertheless, Bones was still there, even before she told him that she didn't want to have any regrets. But now, every single day was a small torture, what if it were Bones instead of Hannah in his bed? What if it was her kissing him every morning? Was it even possible? No, eventually, they would crumble, they were incompatible and even though he would never be able to move on from Bones completely, he still had to give him and Hannah a fair shot, it was a right thing to do.
But then why, why every time she wasn't looking at him, he couldn't tare his gaze from her beautiful face? Why when she was talking her science stuff he felt like home, even though he can't follow even the half of it? Why when she took that stupid, cheap shell today and stood all smiling and beautiful, lost in her thoughts, Booth felt like his heart was about to explode? He loved watching her when she was like this, even though in these moments she was unreachable, lost in whatever complicated world her brilliant mind built. Unreachable, that was what she was for him for years, from that first kiss in the rain, to his painful confession, to now, when he was committed to someone else. She made a step to him, but it was too late. It wasn't anybody's fault, it was just the way things were and probably it was for the best, their friendship and partnership were safe, the line wasn't crossed and they all could live their lives. In any case, being with Bones was Booth's dream and dreams rarely come true in real world, nobody can have it all, he learned to live with that.
Booth closed his eyes, trying to find some sleep before a new day, new case will follow. He could hear the sound of the ocean that soothed him to sleep and Bones's face, beautiful and distant was imprinted in his brain, no matter how much he tried, he would never be free of her power over him, but he has to find a way to make it all work, for all their sakes.