Days have past since that last Singularity…

The final battle of the Grand Order.

We've won. I came back home with Mash and Humanity was saved… But that memory, that last sight before returning back to Chaldea still leaves me with a sadness in my heart that will always be there.

The joyous occasion, the celebration brought along with the success of our mission, is mixed with a bitterness in me that will always leave me wearing a melancholic smile.

After that fateful moment that he must've knew that was already coming, I've learned to appreciate the people around me more. I've been spending more time with them, to let them know that I care for them deeply… But also, to cope with the fact that he's gone. The one person who I regarded as an older brother I never had, gone.

"Ah, Ritsuka. I'm quite surprised to see you still awake at this time.", a voice calls out from behind me.

I turn around and see a beautiful lady in an outfit only she can pull off. "Da Vinci…"

She greets me with a smile and pats me on the back while she stands beside me.

I'm not surprised to see her at this dead of night. Among the staff, only she would still opt to roam around like this while the others decided to take their much needed rest after all has been resolved.

"Can't sleep?", she asks.

"Yeah… Just, something on my mind."

I look towards the distant horizon, and the night sky.

I hear Da Vinci put down her staff before noticing that she decided to watch the sky with me.

"Why are you awake, Da Vinci?", I ask as I look off to her side.

She doesn't answer. Instead, she has this melancholic smile as she watches the stars, and even that is still beautiful to see.

So this is the beauty of the Mona Lisa in the flesh.

"You know Ritsuka? Romani would have loved this sky."

I was taken aback by the sudden mention of the Doctor, but I respond to her after imagining the scene.

Da Vinci, Doctor Roman, Mash and I, just side by side watching this beautiful night sky without the bands of light. The smile on his face would have been such a sight.

"Yeah, Doctor Roman would have loved this moment.", the moment I spoke, my voice cracks. Imagining that scene was enough to overwhelm me with much emotion.

My eyesight begins to blur and burn a little and soon enough, I feel wetness streak down my face. I'm crying again.

I feel a warmness envelop me and it makes me feel safe.

"You know… I don't do this much and usually, I settle things with my words.", Da Vinci softly says, as she continues to hold me in her arms. "But if you start crying like this, I can't help but keep you safe like this until you feel better."

She puts a little space in our hug and lifts my head. Our eyes meet, and she gives me a warm smile, with eyes that show such a caring emotion.

I wipe my tears, yet still continue to cry. "You remind me so much of him right now, Da Vinci."

She chuckles lightly. "Ahaha, I guess maybe I do… After working with him for years, it's not impossible for some of his manners to rub off on me."

"I just wish… I-" My words keep fumbling out with no coherence.

"Do you have a wish, Rituska? Do you wish he were still alive?", Da Vinci asks me.

"Of course I do! That very wish would never go away, and I know you and Mash… Heck, everyone in Chaldea wishes he were still here. But I know that would go against the very thing he decided to do."

That's right. Wishing him to be alive right now would just deny him of his wish, and mock the very resolve he built up to do his sacrifice. He called it a suicide mission… It indeed was the ultimate suicide, to erase your whole being, your whole existence. Now the only ones who remember him are us, the whole people of Chaldea.

"He was quite the coward sometimes… He did say he was scared, but this was something only he could do. He did it for you and for Mash, so you could live a brighter future. He believed it was the best thing to do."

"This is the right thing to do. You and Mash taught me that."

His words echo in my head as that final scene between us play in my memories again.

"I know this has affected you much Ritsuka… You've been more vocal about your gratitude lately."

She noticed. "You noticed, huh…"

"Of course I did. I'm a genius after all."

I chuckled lightly and the air between us lightened up a little. I'm sure Doctor Romani wouldn't want to see us being all sad like this, and I know that Da Vinci knows this too.

She goes back to watching the horizon. "Back when you were about to face off with Goetia, I actually wanted to go out there with you first. But Roman stopped me. He told me to wait for her to come back safely, for you to come back."

She looked at me and ruffled my hair. "You guys were important to him. You remember what he said, don't you? You were his best stroke of good fortune he had the chance of meeting."

"… The greatest of them was you, Ritsuka."

"During this entire Grand Order, there was never a time you weren't there to help me."

You're wrong Doctor. You, along with Da Vinci and Mash, were the ones who were always there to help this novice of a master.

"Hey hey, Ritsuka."

Da Vinci calls out and she bonks me on the head. Out of reflex, I put my hand over the top of my head.

"Da Vinci?"

"You seemed like you were going to cry again.", Da Vinci pouts. "Why don't we do this?"

Da Vinci pulls out a stringed balloon from behind her back.

"Hold this with me.", she says and I oblige. "Now pretend this is a holy grail."

I give her a questioning look.

"Trust me, this is just a balloon. Pretend that this is a holy grail, and when you're ready, wish upon it with all your heart. Take the thing you wish for deeply, and wish it unto this makeshift grail of ours."

She smiles at me, and holds her other hand over mine that is holding the balloon string.

"You don't have to say it out loud Ritsuka. I'll do it with you, we'll both wish unto this thing."

I nod my head and I close my eyes.

What I want to wish for?

Wishing for you to come back is out of the question, but there are still so much I want to tell you, Doctor.

I hate you for leaving this soon.

I hate that you were such a coward sometimes.

I hate you for keeping such a big secret from me until the very end.

But…

I want to praise you for all the things you have done. No other human would have endured all the things you have. I want to make you coffee in the morning for once. I want to pat you on the head like you always do to me after a day's work. I want to say, "good job, Doctor Roman!" I want to give you a big hug after each singularity we've fixed. I want to eat a meal with you, Da Vinci, Mash and the others. I want to tell you that all your efforts for us never went to waste.

There's still so much I wanted to do with you, but the thing I wanted to do most…

I wanted to thank you properly for everything.

Thank you, for taking care of us.

Thank you, for making sure that we were always safe.

Thank you, for working yourself to the bone for all of us.

Thank you, for being the Doctor Roman we always knew.

Thank you, so much… for everything…

I wish…

Ah… My wish? Looks like I've found my wish.

I hold on tightly to this string, as if it were a real grail.

May it be in a dream, or someone else's memory… I don't care if it were in a real world or not. I just wish… I wish to see you on last time, Doctor. I wish that… I could tell you everything I wanted to say. On this makeshift, pretend grail…

I wish to see you, to talk to you one last time.

"Are you ready, Ritsuka?"

"Yes"

"Are you ready to let go?"

I look up at Da Vinci, and I smile. "Yes, I'm ready"

"On the count of three…"

"One"

This is it.

"Two"

Time to say goodbye.

"Three."

Da Vinci finished her countdown and we both slowly let go of the balloon.

I watch as the string leaves my hand, and along with it all the regrets I've held since that day. All the feelings I've held in, I let it all go, along with that balloon, hoping that somehow, somewhere, it reaches him.

Goodbye, Doctor.