"Who knows, Castle" she lays it out "maybe the third time's a charm" She hints and Castle can entirely see where she went with that, so there's absolutely no reason as to why he wouldn't play along with it.
"Yeah, could be" As he says this, he can't help the way his body trembles at the thought that maybe, Kate Beckett is totally right on this one. The way her eyes flicker for a second to his lips doesn't help at all.
"Shall we?" He asks, decreasing the tension right there, after all, this is Ryan's day. He bends his arm so she can intertwine hers in his.
"We shall" The detective responds as she looks up at him, holding his gaze probably for a bit too long. Still, she can't help it, something about walking down the aisle, arm in arm with the writer, with a wedding melody playing in the background, makes her all giddy on the insides.
She is the one finding a place for them to sit, the long bench is still completely free, so she slides all the way to the left side, Castle following her actions. When they sit down, Beckett feels Castle's thigh glued to hers, once again, maybe a bit too close. She side-looks him, to see what his face looks like, to see if this sudden closeness was premeditated or just an oblivious move. But Castle feels her glance, thinking that maybe he was crossing a line there, he moves to his other side, leaving at least a palm of distance between their thighs. His jaw almost drops when she follows him only to glue their legs back together one more time.
The ceremony goes on, and somewhere along the way, Castle's hand encounters her knee. They've been exchanging glances throughout the whole event. Castle looks peaceful as she observes him, wonders what's on his mind as his lips twist up in a small smile every now and then. What she doesn't know is that every time he observes her like she watches him, she looks the exact same way. So that lets the writer conclude that they might be actually having the same thoughts. That one day, hopefully not too far from this date, they could be the ones standing in the front of an audience.
As Ryan and Jenny are declared husband and wife and are given permission to share their first married kiss, Beckett's hand finds Castle's over at her knee. The writer jumps in surprise and looks at her, to which she responds with an incredibly girly smile that he had never seen before. Oh. He is so enjoying this.
They stand up, everyone will now be moving to the reception room. Castle and Beckett follow everyone's lead, though their hands don't seem to let go of each other as they move along in the middle of the crowd and the confusion. What they don't notice is that Lanie is right behind them with Esposito. As usual, the M.E sees every detail, their intertwined fingers included. A smile rises over her face as she elbows Esposito and nods in the pair's direction. Esposito also smiles.
Before the doors leading to the dining area open, all guests gather around the bar. People are ordering every kind of drinks, from wine to cocktails and heavy beverages.
The pair reaches a point where they stop and don't know where to go or how to act. Beckett feels Castle's hand squeezing hers before it starts to feel awkward, which leads her to glance up at him. Wearing those heels, she's almost as tall as he is, and the sudden closeness of their faces doesn't seem to bother her even a bit. And that's what scares her the most. That maybe, the wall she has told him about all those months ago, has been demolished without her even noticing. But god... it feels phenomenal to taste the heat of his eyes burning her lips every time she catches them focused on her mouth. Beckett wonders if he has found her doing the same thing today. Or before.
"Want a glass of wine?" The writer questions her. She senses her smile rising before she even answers.
"That would be nice."
"That red one, right?" Kate Beckett bites her lower lip with this, not because of the thought of the delicious wine, but because she realizes how well this man knows her. Her likes and dislikes, her triggers, everything that makes her her. Because even the detective has to admit it, Richard Castle can read her like no one else ever could. Because she never let anyone get this close.
When he leaves her standing alone to get their drinks, she immediately misses the soft touch of his skin against her hand. The writer retrieves back to her with a big glass of her favorite wine.
"Thanks" It's all she manages to let out. Then there's a silence, not that things are feeling awkward for them, they never really are. But there's something about this wedding, their friend's wedding, which makes all these minor interactions between them seem more real. As if they're officially announcing a relationship they've never even talked about.
As the detective takes a sip of her glass, Ryan and Jenny walk past them, hand in hand, with incredibly happy smiles. Then they go into the dining area that is still closed for the guests.
"I love weddings" Beckett comments as the door closes behind the pair. By his sudden reaction to place his hand on her lower back, Kate assumes he was taken by surprise with her statement.
"You? You love weddings?"
She grins as she takes another sip from the glass and looks at him from under her long lashes "Why is that so hard to believe?" She giggles.
"You once told me you were never one to picture your own wedding, so that led me to believe you didn't find weddings fascinating, let alone love them"
"You, that have been married twice, should know it better than that, right? Doesn't it change when you meet someone with whom you can actually picture it?"
His eyes freeze against hers, his jaw clenches. Hard. Too much was just admitted right there. Why on earth would I say that? Beckett curses herself right before emptying her glass as if she was drinking the wine from a shot cup.
"I'm sorry" she mumbles "I shouldn't have said that" She doesn't look him in the eye now.
"No" The writer stops her and she freezes "I know what you meant" Why does he have to look at her like that when he says this kind of things? It makes her all weak to the knees and utterly incapable of any type of rational thoughts.
Saved by the bell... The detective wonders to herself as the opening into the dining hall is announced.
"Let's go?" Kate asks as incompetently as possible for them. Still not capable of looking the writer in the eye. Although, a smile rises in the corners of her mouth, because these kind of situations is so classic of them. Saying something so truthful yet so heavy, then ignoring it ever happened for the sake of their sanity.
The duo, very conveniently, ends up sitting in an oval table with Lanie, Esposito and their respective plus-ones. Coincidence? Beckett thinks not, and she's almost certain, when the place next to Castle's has a card with her name and not Alexis'.
The table engages a small talk about the latest case they had when the buffet opens. People stand up and the line to get the food seems infinite.
"I am so hungry" Castle whines as both the writer and the detective stand side by side, waiting for their turn to get dinner.
"And if we keep drinking like this, we'll end up having three dinners" Kate tells him jokingly clicking her glass to his. She really has to control herself tonight. Her earlier outburst of an almost confession, got her thinking that maybe, if she hid herself in wine, Castle wouldn't take her words so seriously.
"Why, detective? Getting yourself drunk to gather up the courage to do anything specific?" He's only half serious as he says it. Smirk on his lips. But there's no malice in his expression. He's merely being Castle.
She laughs, trying to hide the blush that thermometers up her cheeks, her hand grabs the arm Castle has flexed due to the fist resting in his pocket.
"Please, Castle. We both know I don't need alcohol to gather up courage to do anything" They move a few steps forward still clinging to each other. She feels him tense yet relax a few moments later. They are both so enjoying this banter.
"Not even for a little push?" He shakes his arm as if she needs clarification that he is still talking to her.
Kate leans her head slightly on the writer's shoulder "Not gonna deny that" She whispers and they don't need to look at each other to know they both have disgustingly hopeful grins on their faces.
When they arrive back at the table, Castle holding both their plates and Kate the drinks, Esposito and Lanie are the only ones there.
"Scared the hell out of your dates? Already?" Castle shoots as he sits. Beckett slapping his arm, though her suppressed laugh doesn't go unnoticed.
"Very funny, bro" Esposito rolls his eyes at them. "At least my date came to the wedding with me. Didn't decline my offer to go to some overrated concert."
The writer is about to open his mouth and hit back, but the ME beats him to it.
"Yet, he is still sitting at the couple's table"
"Speaking of, we're yet to understand how Alexis' card got swiped with mine so fast" Kate throws.
"We? Uh?" Esposito points sharply. With Castle and Beckett trying to ignore the remark each inside their bubble, Lanie and the Hispanic detective exchange a gratifying grin.
"Did you really diffuse a bomb, Rick?" Esposito's cousin, Joey, asks in disbelief.
"Oh, he did!" Beckett reconfirms the story Espo was narrating. "Yet he had no idea what he was doing when he yanked all of those wires" She's laughing at the memory now. So much has changed since then. But he's laughing along with her. And the rest of the table.
"Are you really complaining?" Oh, he's pretending to be offended "I remember you being pretty relieved when those numbers stopped dropping"
"Why does it sound like Javier and detective Ryan don't have half the stories you guys do?" Toby interrogates pretty impressed with Castle and Beckett's near-death experiences.
"Because Danger is Kate and Rick's last name" Everyone turns their faces to the female voice approaching the table.
"Jenny!" Esposito stands up to hug his best friend's wife.
"Are you guys married?" Joey questions confused. Head turning back to the not-couple. Had already noticed there were no wedding bands around their fingers.
"No" "Not yet" The partners answer at the same time. The whole table, and the newly-weds, fall silent. Though neither Beckett nor Castle seem to notice it. Kate letting go of a free and spontaneous laugh as she slaps the back of the writer's head. He's mesmerized by the fact that she didn't correct him.
"Ouch" He whines and the table bursts laughing at the duo once more. Castle goes suddenly still as he feels Kate's ankle crossing his under the table. Not letting go.
"I'm guessing that means 'soon'? Toby asks the rest of the table. Castle and Beckett far too engrossed in their newly created wedding openness. Ryan, Jenny, Lanie and Espo exchange matching grins.
"I'm not sure how this night will end" Kevin comments out loud.
"Ew" Esposito complains.
They all shut quiet again when Beckett tries to stand up but fails miserably as Castle has to grab her by the waist, sitting her back down.
"You stay still...I'll go get you some more cheesecake" The writer declares with a laugh prepared to leave his mouth, hand brushing her shoulder as he storms off to the buffet. She's tipsy.
"Maybe no more wine for me tonight" She whispers to Lanie, who sits next to her.
"Did she say she wanted more cheesecake?" Jenny questions Ryan as she squeezes his hand when they leave the table.
"No"
"Then how did he..."
"They do that a lot" Kevin snorts.
"They look so happy" Beckett comments as everyone stands around the dance floor watching Ryan and Jenny exchanging their first dance.
"They're in love" Castle states this as if it were the most obvious thing in the world for him. The statement takes her back a little, though. As her mind travels to that day on the cemetery. Kate, I love you...I love you, Kate...
She glances up at him. They are close, shoulders glued to one another. His eyes are meticulously capturing the dance, a soft smile on his perfectly shaped lips. And before she knows, before she even understands where her mind has travelled, she's running to the bathroom in near panic attack mode.
Castle senses her move, starts moving after her to see what the hell is wrong, but when Lanie touches his shoulder and tells him she'll go after her friend, he respects that. Gives her the space. Did I push it too far?
Lanie enters the bathroom, since everyone's watching the couple swaying around, Kate's the only one there. She's staring at herself in the mirror, adjusting whatever she thinks it's not perfect in her outfit. But the ME knows her. Her eyes fake emptiness behind the full ray of emotions and thoughts she's having right now.
"He told me he loves me" She lets the words out so fast. And way too low for her own liking. She has to let this out. Except for Burke, Kate's never told anyone about it.
"Tonight?" Lanie questions confused. Everything seemed to be going pretty smoothly since they'd arrived.
"When I was shot" Her eyes are still fixated somewhere in the mirror.
"That was months ago" Lanie's tone is not accusatory, she's surprised. Not surprised to learn that the writer is in love with her best friend, that they all knew. Just... why now, Kate?
"I wasn't ready to hear him say that" Lanie realizes Beckett is looking at her hand through the mirror, the hand that's been pressed against Castle's since the wedding began.
She reclines against the sink, to be able to take a better look at the frozen figure Kate Beckett seems to have become. She thinks she's starting to understand the situation. Small steps, Dr. Parish. She tells herself.
"But you are now?"
"No" She breathes. Suddenly turning to her friend for their eyes to meet. Lanie's heart breaks as she observes the self-conflict Kate is having. "I mean, maybe I am, I don't know" Her hand moves up to hook a piece of hair behind her ear.
"And the fact that you don't know is what made you run away like that"
"I'm drunk" She declares popping herself up to sit next to the sink. Their silent for a few minutes. Lanie knows Kate's not done yet.
"The thing is" She starts again. Lanie's all ears "I think I know how I feel about him too, hell... I'm pretty certain" Another pause. She's trying to simplify her words as much as possible. Piece by piece. "And I feel the same way he does about me"
"Then I don't see what's stopping you"
"Because I feel it, I really do, but I'm not able to say those three words. At least not yet. And that's not fair to him"
Oh! So that's what's going on...
"Actions speak louder than words" The ME smiles "You don't have to tell him right away. Show him" And as Lanie finishes the sentence, somehow a weight is lifted off her shoulders. Her eyes become greener and the air surrounding her fresher.
Lanie sent him a smile as she exited the bathroom. He doesn't understand it.
It took Beckett five more minutes to leave the restroom. Five too long minutes he had to wait alone. But when he finally sees her, her face looks different. Something in the way her eyes lock immediately to his as if she knew he'd be outside waiting for her. The swing of her hips is more prominent too, and the brightness in her eyes as colorful as ever.
Once she's at an arm's length, he extends his hand to her "Would you like to dance with me?" He asks softly. Still clueless to what just happened in there but always the gentleman.
"Is that even a question at this point?" And she's back at the game.
Castle has an arm tightly wrapped around her waist, keeping her close. Her head rests comfortably on his broad shoulder as their hands are joined together in the side. Synchronized bodies swaying to an Andrew Belle song.
"What happened earlier?" His voice is barely a whisper. But she's close enough to hear him "I hope I haven't pushed you too much tonight"
Her heart clenches at that. God. This man deserves the world. I can't possibly be enough... She lifts her head from where it rests, her free hand, that was around his back, coming to rest on his jaw. Thumb caressing his face as she meets his gaze profoundly.
"I could never ask you to stop pushing" His head reclines to her touch, savoring the moment, afraid that at any moment he'll wake up in an empty bed alone "Because you pushing, is what's gotten us this far"
Castle moves to delicately crash his forehead to hers. "I won't stop pushing then"
"Good" She breaths deeply, loving the way his forehead touching hers makes all this seem less complicated "I don't want you to"
Two songs later, Castle's holding her a little tighter, and she lets him because this, them, feels right.
Beckett's temple is resting against his when she spots Lanie dancing with Esposito. Her friend smiles at her and she can't help the blush that heats up her cheeks, as the ME whispers something to Espo that makes him twirl them around so he can see the pair himself. Kate hides her shy smile dipping her face in the crock of the writer's neck. Breathing his scent in.
Castle, unfortunately, pauses their bubble of affection on the dance floor, to go to the bathroom. Kate takes the opportunity to retrieve back to their table and rest her feet for a while. Deep in thought. A smile on her lips as she remembers the way their bodies seem to fit so perfectly even dancing. If she felt this kind of intimacy in just a simple slow dance, she wonders what it will actually feel like when they...
"I guess Kev forgot to mention The Richard Castle was attending his wedding" Her thoughts are cut when a voice, coming from a nearly blonde, blue-eyed, young woman, beeped in.
"Ryan's sister, right?" She asks suddenly remembering Ryan had a lot of sisters.
"Yes. Savanah. And you are?" The girl sounds so much like her brother. It's amusing.
"Kate Beckett"
"The Kate Beckett? Detective Beckett?"
Beckett laughs at the girl's reaction. She's probably as tipsy as her. "That's me"
"I'm sorry. It's just that Kev talks about you guys all the time with such awe, and now I can see why." She pauses "You and your boyfriend are quite the pair. No one could take their eyes off of you."
Suddenly, she sees Castle returning from the bathroom and walking up towards her. She forgets how to breathe. The room is rapidly crowded with way too many people around her. Watching her? Them? Boyfriend?
Before she even registers anything else, the detective is walking down the hall to the balcony. She needs some air. Urgently.
Okay. So maybe coming to the balcony wearing nothing except for the heels and the dress was a bad idea. She's already freezing. The detective wraps her own arms around her body as an attempt of warmth as her mind keeps reliving every moment since the wedding began.
His blue eyes. The fact that his hands mold perfectly with hers... His sappiness is getting to her... That god damn comfort that she feels when he's near. And for a moment, as her head keeps replaying all these images, she wonders why things are so complicated when, right now everything seems so easy, so right for them. Maybe she wasn't extraordinary like he once said. But maybe they could be extraordinary together.
"A penny for your thoughts?" A voice, his voice, startles her.
"Jeez, Castle" She curses turning around to face him.
"Sorry" The writer says, sliding his jacket off his shoulders "I didn't mean to scare you"
"What are you doing?" Beckett inquires as he gently places the warm jacket on her shoulder.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" Castle shots back, eyebrow high on his forehead. "You were turning into a popsicle"
They stand side by side, silent, merely looking out to the horizon and probably counting stars to distract the palpable tension hanging in the air.
"Kate.."
"Rick..."
They both chuckle.
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry" She declares. He looks confused and she catches him. Pulls his hands into hers as they now stand face to face. "I'm sorry for bein..." Her body goes still.
He couldn't help it. Kate Beckett was standing in front of him, in that sexy dress and those sky-high heels, his jacket on her like she owned it, their fingers linked together, with eyes so full of sentiment brought out by the stars shining behind her glorious frame, that he couldn't help it. He didn't know what she was sorry for, but certainly that could wait.
His lips meet hers and she freezes in surprise. But as her own lips start to move against his wet mouth, her body relaxes. Her hands find his cheeks in a way to pull his closer to her, to feel him for real. And as he pulls her hips against his, his jacket on her back falls flat on the ground.
Castle's sure that she had also been waiting to do that all night when she's the one opening her mouth. They both taste like red wine as their tongues wrestle. Holding on so tight to each other that is impossible to get closer. He bites her lower lip with his teeth and loses it all when she lets out a moan in surrender. One of his hands finding her ass, giving it a light squeeze that makes Beckett moan again.
"Rick..." She breaths out when they part. Her thumb caressing his swollen lower lip as he rests his forehead against hers. "You cannot do that to me when I'm trying to open up with you" she laughs leaning in to steal another kiss from that talented mouth.
"I'm sorry. Couldn't help it" He tells her removing his hand from her ass to move back to her hip.
She looks up at him, hands around his neck. Both holding on for dear life.
"This feels so..."
"...easy?" He completes. As if the conversation she was having with herself earlier had come out loud for him to hear.
"Yeah" There comes the sadness in her eyes "But it really isn't, is it?"
There's the same sadness in his eyes too now "I guess not"
Silence takes over them as thoughts are gathered like a train. Her thumb finds his lip again and he can swear her eyes are becoming glassy.
"I'm trying to be better"
"I know you are" He kisses her finger lightly. "But just so you know," His right hand moves up to cup her cheek "you're already remarkable to me"
She breaths deeply. This is so not fair to a man that proves her every day how hard he's working to earn her broken heart. Kate looks down as if in defeat with her self-conflicts.
"There's something you need to know"
A/N For those who followed "Captain Beckett"... I'm deeply sorry for dropping it the way I did. This one has been sitting around in my docs for months, I hope you guys are willing to give it a shot. Not sure how many chapters it'll have but at least 2 more are already written.