Disclaimer: Good Omens, along with its characters, locations, etc. are the property of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. If I owned the rights to it, I wouldn't still be desperate to meet the man that I absolutely ADORE: David Tennant. The song is the property of Breaking Benjamin.
Summary: Songfic based on Ashes of Eden by Breaking Benjamin. Post-apocalypse. Ineffable Husbands. Love confessions. One-Shot.
A/N: Okay so bear with me. I've never once written a songfic and have probably read about three total, but this song gives me Ineffable Husbands feels every single time I hear it, so I had to write something. If you haven't heard the song, definitely listen to it. It isn't a typical BB song, its slower. I'm pretty sure this is a terrible story, one of the worst I have written in a long time, but I just had to do it for the sake of my sanity. But please leave a kind review if you like it, I've been struggling a lot lately and kind reviews always make me feel better!
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Ashes of Eden
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Crowley and Aziraphale were lounging around the bookshop, quietly listening to the radio. Crowley was sprawled across the sofa, his legs thrown over Aziraphale's lap. Aziraphale was reading a book, softly stroking Crowley's leg while the demon laid there with his arm thrown over his eyes and listened to the music.
For once, Crowley had chosen to listen to a more modern rock station rather than classic rock. It was playing bands like Shinedown, Five Finger Death Punch, and Three Days Grace. Just as he was wondering whether he should take a nap, the radio host announced a song name that piqued his interest.
"Coming up next, Ashes of Eden by Breaking Benjamin!" A soft, slow song came over the radio. He sat up, curious about what slow song could possibly be playing on a rock station.
Then he started listening to the lyrics. They said everything that he had ever needed to hear.
Crowley slowly turned toward Aziraphale, swatting him on the arm to get him to pay attention.
"Crowley, what…" he started to protest, still holding his book open.
Crowley shushed him quickly, motioning for the angel to listen to the song. He needed Aziraphale to head all of the things that he had always felt, but never said outloud.
Crowley felt several different emotions filling his chest: longing, heartbreak, love, sadness, and more all at once. He felt tears threatening to spill from his eyes as he reached for Aziraphale's hand and clung onto it.
"Aziraphale, I need you to listen to this." Crowley choked out. Aziraphale nodded, quickly bookmarking his novel and tossing it onto the coffee table along with his reading glasses. He threw Crowley's legs off of his, scooting closer so their knees were touching, placing his free hand comfortingly on Crowley's knee. The chorus played again, and Crowley felt tears choking his throat.
"This is… this is…" Crowley couldn't form words. This song encompassed everything that he had ever felt, from his feelings about his Fall to how important Aziraphale would always be to him.
The song started repeating the line "Don't let go" over and over. Crowley had struggled for so long with the idea that he could end all of his pain by ending his life. Hearing a beautiful voice urging him to keep going was making tears fall down his face. Aziraphale looked at him and gently wiped the tears away with his thumb, a sad smile on his face.
The song slowly faded, leaving Crowley feeling like there was a hole in his heart. A rock song started playing after that, but Aziraphale snapped his fingers so the radio would stop playing.
"Crowley, are you alright?" Aziraphale asked quietly, concerned. He looked toward Crowley, but he turned away, ashamed of the things that he was feeling. He needed Aziraphale to listen to the song, but he wasn't sure that he could talk about all of the things that he was feeling.
Crowley shook his head. He took a moment to compose himself before he spoke. "That song… God I've never related to something like I've related to that. Some of the lyrics… I felt that way when I was cast out Heaven, screaming for anyone Above to hear me. I feel like that when I think about how God abandoned me. And the part about staying with me until the ashes of Eden fall… Aziraphale, I feel that way about you. I just…" he sniffed and choked back a sob. He never remembered reacting to a song like this the first time he heard it, ever.
Aziraphale brushed a hand down Crowley's jaw. "I'm so sorry that you have gone through all of that pain, Crowley. God should never have abandoned you the way that She did, and Heaven shouldn't have either. You are better than all of the angels combined, my dear." He brushed away a tear that was falling from Crowley's eye. "And for what you said about me… I would never abandon you, Crowley. Never."
"I'm just a low-life demon, angel…" Crowley started to argue.
"Not to me, dear. I may have treated you like that in the past, but you are the single most important person in my life, Crowley. I know you have abandonment issues, but… I will always be here for you. The apocalypse made me realize that I wouldn't want to even be alive without you by my side, dearest. I don't know what I could say to convince you, but…"
"I love you, Aziraphale." Crowley choked out. "I have always loved you." He added.
Aziraphale gave him a small smile, brushing his hand over his snake tattoo. "I love you too, Crowley, and I always will. Please believe me."
"I'll try, angel." Crowley sniffed. Aziraphale snapped his fingers, making the radio play the song again. Crowley laid his head against Aziraphale's chest and let out a deep breath. Maybe he would be alright after all.
A/N: I am so sorry.