Borrowed Pen
A pen is borrowed from another person and then returned to the pen owner. The pen is a little worse for wear. It's mangled in a zig zag formation and contorted into a knot.
As icing on the cake, it's also covered in an unearthly goo. Ink spurts sporadically from the top of the pen.
The pen owner wonders what happened to the pen to bring it to this state. He's both horrified and mystified by the unearthly goo it's covered with. He sniffs the pen trying to figure what to make of it. In the process of sniffing it he gets squirted in the eye with the ink.
Shocked, the pen owner asks, "What happened to the pen?"
Dismissively, the pen borrower says, "Oh, it's a long story. I'd rather not get into it."
The pen owner barks, "What?! I can't move on in life until I know what happened to this pen."
Gleefully, the pen borrower rocks up on his toes. He looks at the pen and says, "Oh, me and this little guy went on quite an adventure together."
Perplexed, the pen owner asks, "An adventure? What do you mean?"
The pen borrower says, "Well he had quite a few chores to do for me."
The pen owner asks, "Chores? What kind of chores?"
The pen borrower says, "Well I used it to pick my g-spot, the gutters, the sewers, then back to the g-spot, and finally I used it to do a little doodling. But there wasn't a lot of ink left in the pen after all that."
The pen owner asks, "Not a lot of ink left? There's more ink coming out of the top of the pen, then ever existed in the pen to begin with."
The pen borrower says, "Well when pushed to your limits you'd be surprised at the reverses you'd have stored up in you."
The pen owner asks, "It's an inanimate object, not a kid in boot camp."
The pen borrower gestures to the pen and says, "Tell that to the pen."
The pen owner asks, "Did you try to clean it after all that?"
The pen borrower says, "Of course, of course... right after I used it to pick food out of my mouth."
Looking at the pen, the pen owner asks skeptically, "You cleaned it? What with?"
The pen borrower says like it's obvious, "That's easy... with my mouth."
Astounded, the pen owner holds the pen away from himself and says, "I can't use this pen."
The pen borrower looks offended and asks, "Why not?! What's wrong with it?"
The pen owner looks horrified back and forth from the pen borrower to the pen.
The pen borrower gestures to the pen and says, "It's still good."
The pen owner says, "Oh no, I can never use this pen again. Don't you know why? Isn't it obvious?" He holds the pen up into the air and looks at it with amazement.
The mangled goo-covered pen is zoomed in on. The camera then backs up on the pen and it's then revealed to be in a display case in a museum.
The plague reads, "The most amazing miss use of property ever witnessed."
A tour guide proudly shows the displayed pen to a group of museum patrons.
The tour guide says, "Behold the greatest transformation in an object of writing."
The museum patrons ohh, ahh, and clap in amazement.