Been reading too many isekai manga, what can I say.
This is for you Pinay Tiger, since you said you needed it and I totally get that feeling. My brain obliged me this time. I'll work on rewriting that old lemon next, probs.
Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin is so old it can vote and drink and I definitely don't own it.
Kaoru's eyes fluttered open and as she stared at a familiar crack in the ceiling she felt a frustrated curse bubble between chapped lips. Covering her face with her hands she allowed a low groan and then flipped over to scream directly into her futon, hitting it with ineffectual fists. If she made too much noise, like she wanted to do, any one of the menfolk that were in residence might check in on her. Maybe not Sano—like as not he was still sleeping.
She felt her pounding heart in her ears and waited until it slowed before she pushed herself up from her facedown position and went about the tasks of dressing, brushing and retying her hair, and in general freshening up for the day. As she tied it on, the worn, bright patterns of her kimono felt like they didn't suit her somehow—as if they were too young. However, there was no doubt in her mind that her bones were seventeen even if her teeth might be a bit younger overall. She didn't want to ask any stupid questions about that to Megumi, though, since likely the doctor would give her some snarky answer about anatomy that made her feel dumb.
There was so much she wanted to say to everyone and yet absolutely no desire to open her mouth and put her sanity in question. Focusing on the tasks at hand was the best thing, like opening up the windows to let the cool morning air in and then seeing what Kenshin was cooking for breakfast even though she already knew. Yahiko would no doubt want to train today, but overall she wasn't feeling up to it. Tomorrow they could resume, but if she begged off with a headache today he'd probably believe her and let her be.
Since the Akebeko wasn't an ash pit at this point in the year, it would be nice to treat herself to a meal without the pressure of their eyes on her.
"…Kaoru!"
She startled as Yahiko practically popped out of nowhere, causing her to shriek and lash out with a wild punch which he handily dodged. "Why would you startle me like that!"
"I called your name like a thousand times, jeez. You don't look ready to practice." He examined her with narrowed eyes and she knew he wouldn't find fault with her appearance. Not a hair was out of place, and she held herself with a confidence that she knew she hadn't had yesterday.
"I have a headache, so we'll have to pick up where we left off tomorrow. If you're feeling ambitious you could go do practice swings, but I think we've both earned a day off."
Yahiko gave her a look. She knew that around this time she was always fired up and spouting off about how they needed to be ready to defend themselves given all the trouble Kenshin had brought to her doorstep. They had always faced everything together and when one storm passed there was another on the horizon for the ex-assassin. A relaxing day was, for all intents, suspicious.
"Whatever." With the resilience of a child, Yahiko didn't question his good luck and spun on a heel to run off. If he was going to do kunai swings, or planning on goofing off with the neighborhood kids she couldn't care less. While it hadn't bothered her before, she was suddenly bowled over with guilt for not having enough money for tuition for primary school for him. Kenshin and Sano had been giving him periodic lessons so she knew he wasn't illiterate, but a formal education would probably stand him in better stead than playing around. Well, given that it would only take him a couple weeks to arrive from China, Kaoru was sure Enishi could carve some blood money out of his hoard to send Yahiko to school. They had even discussed it once, what felt like ages ago. At the time she had insisted that he do something worthy for people with his ill-gotten fortune rather than throw it away on explosives and private islands because how many children could go to school for the cost of a single cannon?
That argument had been so frivolous, and even thinking on it made the corners of her mouth curl up, so by the time she had opened up the windows and circled back to the kitchen Kenshin was greeting her with his own answering grin.
"You look radiant this morning, Miss Kaoru." Kenshin's soft voice and even softer smile were welcome given the turmoil her mind was experiencing as she tried to recall what exactly happened yesterday.
Normally his praise would have brought a ruddy blush to her cheeks, but today she was a different woman than she had been, and so she simply accepted the compliment and got to work helping Kenshin set up dishes in the dining area for everyone. Things were going great until Yahiko swept into the room with such force that the door opening clattered like a gunshot. Immediately, Kaoru felt the tray of dishes she was holding drop from limp hands as her body reacted to her mental panic.
"Kaoru!" Yahiko might be a lot of bluster, but he cared when it counted, and he helped her clean up the broken ceramics with minimal fuss. As soon as Kenshin came in Yahiko loudly proclaimed the tale of her headache, which truly saved her from having to explain the latent tremor in her hands as she sat down and food was placed in front of her along with a steaming mug of tea.
"If your headache is that bad you should see the doctor, Miss Kaoru," Kenshin said, all solicitation.
Sano wandered in, yawning, and sat down in front of a tray of steaming food while mumbling good morning. Yahiko kept darting glances at Kaoru with a furrowed brow but also found his own food and tucked in like the growing boy he was. Kenshin hadn't left her side because she hadn't answered him, she realized. The way he modeled his care for others was inspiring. Even now she knew she wouldn't have been so patient.
"I'm just fine Kenshin. No need to see Megumi. This will pass, I promise you, please have some breakfast before it gets cold." Her smile was only a little bit forced, and surely Kenshin knew that, but he also knew when to disengage from a conversation and he took a seat to slowly enjoy the fish and rice he had made for everyone.
The miso soup was objectively delicious, all of Kenshin's cooking was, but Kaoru could barely taste it as she reminded her aching soul that there was nothing to worry about right now. The dangers of yesterday were a world away and maybe would never come to pass again.
Now she really was getting a headache.
Really, Enishi found her much faster than she ever would have expected, even if it had felt like absolute ages to her all the same. Time was a bit relative to her now, but waiting for something was not one of her finer skills. Every flash of white hair had her heart speeding up, so she often came home grumpy from the market. Pouring her anxiety into sword practice had been good for her, but difficult for Yahiko and they had been arguing more than usual. It was hard to remember he was still ten years old, sometimes. His behavior made sense so long as she accepted things as they appeared.
Kenshin was getting used to the lull between challenges, and she could see the tension begin to ease out of his shoulders in the evening as he scanned the horizon and they drank tea and discussed whatever silly thing Sano had done or Yahiko had said. Sometimes they would plan for repairs to the dojo and Kaoru would wonder what could have been if not for a quirk of fate. Being with Kenshin was comfortable, a warm blanket on a cold day. He made her feel safe.
Two weeks after Kaoru had started insisting she do the grocery shopping alone, she felt a tug on her arm hard enough to dislodge her hold on the cloth bag of vegetables. A radish hit the dirt out of the corner of her eye before her vision was filled with fine brown wool. The arms around her were a trap, and she succumbed with a relief that brought tears to her eyes.
"Did you leave the first day? How is it possi—" In this dark narrow alley there were probably still eyes on them given the density in the city, but Enishi didn't care as he pulled away only enough to kiss her in the way she had always wished he would. They had danced around one another long enough, it seemed, and he wasn't willing to waste another second. Kaoru wasn't experienced enough with kissing to judge the technique, but given the way she felt the world tilt she was pretty sure this was exceptional. It was when she felt the tip of his tongue touch hers that a sense of propriety pulled her back to earth.
"Enishi, please…" She was unsure of her own desire—to stop or to continue—but he quickly decided for her and spent a moment looking her over and mapping her body with his hands. He was making sure she was uninjured, she knew, given their dramatic parting. "I'm fine. I'm safe."
Now that there was a bit of space between them, she could make out the western style wool suit and navy bowtie. The tie, the messy white hair, and those fussy round glasses of his—which she was still unsure were needed or simply a fashion choice—gave him the appearance of a government clerk. However, one look at the hard set of his thin lips and the gleam in his eye that implied he was mentally dissecting you dispelled any pretense that he might be harmless.
"This time Heishin dies before he becomes a liability." This was not the sweet nothings she desired, but she supposed they were the only ones Enishi felt mattered. "Otowa knows a number of capable whores and she can ensure one of his nights out entertaining investors he succumbs to some disagreement or another."
"You trust her to do that?"
"No farther than I can throw her, but it would cause the fewest waves."
Kaoru clicked her tongue in reproach. "You know I don't like it when you… you know."
His arms tightening around her once more, Kaoru felt his words through his chest more than heard them. "And how many times has he killed you? Think of it as revenge."
"Sometimes I think that's all you think of." She didn't like being the inspiration for more blood on his hands. It caused a caustic lump to form in her throat no matter how much she swallowed.
"Stop trying to manipulate me into an argument. You know why I feel this way." His lips were on hers again, slanting hard to the point of near pain before he disengaged almost as suddenly. "It was the second time you died in my arms; your blood was everywhere…" His trauma was compounded by their connection, but Kaoru also knew the pain of watching him fade while her hands tried to grasp his soul and will it to stay in his body.
For an indulgent moment Kaoru allowed herself to be enveloped by Enishi's strength as well as a familiar scent of chemicals from the weapons he dealt in mixed with sweat from wearing a three-piece suit in the middle of summer. She wondered why he wasn't in his gaudy Chinese style outfits, but perhaps this had been a way for him to show intention to her that he had no desire to start a fight while he was in her domain. He'd had years to mull over the contents of his sister's journal, as well as a taste of success in his vengeance even if there had been no longevity to it.
"How will I ever explain this to anyone?"
"The only one with any knowledge of me at this point is my thrice cursed brother-in-law, and while he will suspect me of using you to get to him, he's the type to watch a situation before taking decisive action." Enishi spoke with a confidence Kaoru wished she felt. "If nothing else his desire to believe in redemption makes him that much easier to fool."
The flash of anger that stiffened her posture also gave her enough force to push away Enishi's muscular form. "If I didn't know better, I would think you came here for him. And while at this point no one will attack you on sight I don't have a good story for why I know you in the first place!"
Enishi was seemingly unbothered by this little detail as he gave her one more hooded gaze before leading the way out of the narrow alley. Kaoru paused long enough to pick up her dropped bag of vegetables and tofu and easily located his tall form among the milling pedestrians on the side of the street. He was impossible to miss and she sped up to first overtake then match his pace. Those nerves of his were acting up, she could tell from the telltale bulge of his sleeves, giving away more of his own nervousness about the upcoming confrontation with Kenshin than his words ever would.
"No way! You're out of your mind!" Yahiko was on the verge of frustrated tears, and using his anger to cover it up. "I won't let you get scammed by some weirdo you just met!" It was as if he could sense Enishi was triad, but given his upbringing was yakuza adjacent perhaps there were telltale signs that he could see that Kaoru could not.
Sano was laughing his ass off in the corner of the room, clearly unable to process what he just heard. He'd probably circle back to brotherly concern soon enough. Kenshin looked like he wanted to draw his sword, and if he supposedly no longer possessed what could be termed a killing aura his energy definitely promised a maiming of some sort. It intensified when Enishi reached down to twine his fingers with Kaoru's. She'd be pissed at him for egging them all on, but his long fingers brushed hers just so and she could feel how soft the skin was on the back of his hands. It was difficult to imagine anything about Enishi being soft, so she enjoyed it while she could.
All in all, these reactions were to be expected given that Kaoru had announced that she was inviting Enishi to stay at the dojo and oh there was the small detail of him being her fiancé. Originally, she hadn't planned on including anything like that last bit, but Enishi couldn't help slipping that detail out into the open air simply because he wanted to cause maximum chaos. She wasn't going to refute him, even if she thought it was a bit presumptuous.
"Miss Kaoru, I beg of you, please let us speak to you as a household before you finalize your decision." Kenshin wanted to tell his story, she saw it in his eyes as his bleak past already began to swim to the forefront of his thoughts. She was so tired of the bloody tale that destroyed and remade Kenshin all in one fell swoop, partially because she had heard it several times from his own lips and partially because she had ruminated on it for veritable ages while emotionally isolated in supposed paradise.
"I know who he is, Kenshin." Her simple words pierced the gentle swordsman; she saw his posture stiffen and heard the sharp intake of breath. "We do need to talk, though. Enishi," All the men bristled as she addressed the newcomer in a familiar manner. "Please can you come back tomorrow morning?"
"If he's coming back, then I'm leaving! It's him or me!" Yahiko tried to puff out his chest, and the snort from the white-haired man next to her almost sent the boy flying over in fury. A rare quelling look from Kenshin seemed to keep Yahiko from storming off altogether.
Kaoru dug her nails into the back of Enishi's hand in warning before she pulled away. "Yahiko, you're my family and I would never abandon you, but you also need to accept that new people are bound to enter our life."
The boy looked to Kenshin, whose lips tightened to a thin line.
"Tomorrow then. Perhaps by then you'll have your house in order." Enishi couldn't help but be snide, she knew, since his nerves were still bulging noticeably from the proximity to Kenshin. How he must want to rage at him, throw punches, strangle him there on the tatami they all sat on—but Kaoru would never forgive him for it.
As soon as Enishi's presence faded from the property and disappeared into the night, Kaoru knew the questions would begin. Yahiko was of course concerned with the fact that he was a criminal. Sano wanted to know if he needed to beat the man up for compromising her virtue, because why else would she show up with a stranger like this? Kenshin was silent while Kaoru stumbled through a story she had been trying to spin from the start about a chance encounter with the man that had led to something more while knowing she wasn't a good enough liar for the rurouni to believe her.
The truth would have been a million times worse to tell: that she and Enishi had lived the same year together a half dozen times. That each time one or the other of them had died, causing both to return to the same day one year before the original confrontation on the beach in which Enishi planned on finishing his jinchuu. That they were seemingly the only ones that remembered those previous realities.
It was easier to be thought a silly seventeen-year-old girl who had her head turned by a handsome face than to explain that fate had tied her to a madman who had lived his whole life dedicated to destroying his former brother-in-law. And being Enishi's fiancé would quickly explain her constant proximity to the man as they made sure they safely navigated the next year. If neither of them died, could they escape this hell?
That kiss in the alleyway had added a new complex dimension to what had been, for years, a mutually agreed upon attempt to keep the other alive and sane. The deal had become that much more Faustian.
"No matter how you look at it, this isn't quite 'tomorrow morning', is it?" Kaoru testily rubbed her eyes and pulled her robe together more firmly even if there wasn't much there to be exposed to begin with under the normally forgiving light of the quarter moon. It was so late it was early, but the sun wasn't threatening to rise so she figured Enishi hadn't been able to sleep and merely wanted to spread the misery around.
"For all their dramatics, your tenants make terrible guard dogs."
"Don't call them that…" Kaoru grumbled as she practically swayed towards his perch in her windowsill. He was back in his eye piercingly orange outfit so he hadn't been going for anything like subtlety. She would almost think him bored, except when she brushed his leg on her way to lean near him, she saw the way he startled away. It brought a smile to her lips that she could finally affect him, even if it was only in little ways. She hadn't been a threat the first few years of their association, barely a gnat then a curiosity. "Besides, you're a step above the normal prowler."
"I had expected them to be better at this; you're too unguarded here."
Kaoru wanted to sigh, but making light of his concerns was a fast track to a headache and she was too tired for that battle. "Your attention is the most dangerous thing in my life right now."
He didn't seem to find that funny. "Your enemies are not the problem."
Sadly, he had a point. If it were not for the fact that in six repetitions of this month Kenshin had not so much as annoyed a merchant let alone faced down yet another associate from his past gave her unearned confidence this time around as well.
Kaoru didn't even realize she was slowly sliding down the side of the wall she had braced herself against until Enishi caught her by the arm. Her arm felt a little creaky in his grasp, but it was the way the moon reflected off his glasses that alerted her to the angle of his glance and had her straightening her spine and shaking him off. She crossed her arms across her chest and let her long hair snake forward across her collarbone.
"Why are you here?" She sounded more breathless than petulant and she flinched as she felt her heart leap into her throat as he swung both legs to the inside of her window and leaned forward to grip her by the chin. He liked playing the predator, and she had learned that backing away only made his behaviors more obnoxious so she stood her ground and stared down the shadows his face had become.
The pad of his thumb ran across her bottom lip and her mouth cracked open involuntarily. Enishi's self-assurance fell away when his physicality had to be used to seduce instead of intimidate. She had played these games with him mere months ago in another life on the island, wondering if this broken man even knew what flirtation might be and as she suspected he disengaged.
"If you want sweet words, you should ask someone else."
It was too late for this nonsense. "And what if I did, what would you do?" Kaoru snapped.
They both knew the answer was nothing rational, nor proportionate, however he didn't supply an answer to her before he slipped back out into the night. Kaoru shut her window and made sure it was latched this time, even if such precautions were ceremonial at best given the kind of people who both Kenshin and Enishi made enemies of out there.
It was ironic all the men in her life opposed Enishi so strongly when, of all of them, he was the only one gainfully employed and out of the house the majority of the time. However, just because Enishi was not present didn't mean his presence wasn't felt. Yahiko had been training himself into a state of constant exhaustion, and appeared to be sleeping poorly on top of it. Sano was often resting suspiciously within eyesight of whatever Kaoru was doing at any given point in the day, and Kenshin had been wearing his sword more often around the dojo which made laundry day a little bit ludicrous.
On top of her inner sanctum feeling more like house arrest, there was the added dimension of when she did get out of the house—always escorted these days—she would sometimes get a glimpse out of the corner of her eye of a familiar clothing pattern or a masked face. Kaoru had to consciously prevent herself from grinding her teeth during the day. All of them were ridiculous. This reaction was disconnected from any real danger to her person.
She wrote letters to Misao in an attempt to simply be able to talk to someone about what she was feeling, even though the worldview of a lovesick sixteen-year-old girl was so far beyond her comprehension now that it might have been easier to talk to Aoshi Shinomori about her troubles. The responses had been predictably confused from her friend: didn't she love Kenshin? Was it really wise to marry a stranger? Could she really trust a man she barely knew? Was this Yukishiro guy really that handsome? Could he cook and clean and fight as well as Kenshin?
The answering letters, which Kaoru strongly suspected Enishi would somehow intercept and read, contained more truth than he suspected—she didn't love Kenshin. It wasn't wise to marry a stranger, but he wasn't precisely a stranger to her as their association was longer standing than even the time she had been with Kenshin (technically true if impossible to elaborate on). She couldn't comment on the cooking and cleaning, but he fought as well as Kenshin if a bit differently.
And, yes, he really was that handsome.
Too handsome.
Ever since their kiss weeks ago, Kaoru felt like those tense dinners when he deigned to appear at the dojo were choking her. The men thought her lack of appetite when Enishi was around was a silent cry for help, and in a sense they weren't wrong.
Enishi could have picked any number of stupid stories to cover up his interest, but the word fiancé had drilled down into her soul and exposed dreams she had put aside the first time she died while trying to prevent the Akebeko fire for the fourth time. So, when she wistfully watched a bridal procession at a shrine she was shaken to find a wedding kimono delivered to the dojo before the summer was out.
It was thoughtful. It was enraging.
"This time you went too far…" Kaoru words were clipped as she snapped open Enishi's door with a practiced flick of her wrist. She had first made sure he was home, given he hadn't appeared for dinner, and based on the smell of smoke and alcohol lingering in the humid room his late night had something to do with business, shady or otherwise.
She had enough wherewithal to swallow her gasp before he could suspect her discomfort as he stood there in nothing but brown wool suit pants. Plucking his glasses from atop a small chest of drawers, he blinked at Kaoru and waited for her to continue with what she was accustomed to calling his 'usual frown.' His outrageous bedhead did soften the masculine appeal he otherwise exuded to her. This whole situation only further underlined how inappropriate his gift had been, somehow.
"I realize you are incapable of deviating from a plan once initiated, but your fiancé story doesn't need to be backed by the most expensive clothes that have ever entered this house." Kaoru hissed to cover for her slowly reddening face. "Yahiko almost had a seizure when I opened the packages up. It's a poor joke."
The joke was her, for the way her heart hammered as her fingers had skimmed the reds and golds, or traced the outline of birds and flowers. For picturing a day that wouldn't come, that this time next year might not even exist in this reality. The torrential monsoon rains outside matched her heavy mood.
"Why would you think I was joking? It makes more sense than the alternatives. I have no use for you in my organization—either side of it—and making you my doxy leaves you vulnerable for lack of status."
His cold logic seared her. "What if I don't want this? Will you drag me by the hair to the registration office?" She was saying blatantly inflammatory things now, as if spitting venom would ease her heartache.
Sometimes she forgot how damn fast he was, and before she could turn on her heel to storm out as childishly as she had stormed in, his arms were snaked around her and trapping her from striking out meaningfully.
"I don't appreciate this game you play." He spoke in a controlled tone that stirred the hair near her ear while she closed her eyes to shut out the feeling of bare skin sliding over her light summer kimono. "You started this, I'm just taking it to its logical conclusion."
Denying it would make her a liar. Did she not try to ingratiate herself to him that first year on the island? Did she not witness his hanging body in Rakinamura after he killed Kenshin in the second year? Did she not seek him out after that with gentle words and furtive touches?
"I wanted to be asked, not told." Her truth was embarrassing, which is why she didn't open her eyes as she felt his hot breath move down her cheek. Enishi this close was pure havoc.
If she thought that maybe he'd finally offer her the slightest bit of softness, she almost laughed as his murmur of "Hypocrite." Their hungry kiss tasted like the sour dregs of foreign alcohol and the cold green tea she'd drunk before this. Maybe the only courtesy he had right now was to make sure it was his back that hit the futon on the floor as Kaoru pulled at her clothes on top of him.
Marriage, she decided, as the morning wore on, would in fact come with unexpected perks. Perhaps she would go fish the wedding kimono out of the dusty closet she had thrown it in.