Green smoke rose from the chimney of the hut as I approached it, along with a sickening, fruity odor that hung in the air, and a faint whirring as well. Great, I thought to myself. This one's all about appearances, too.

After consulting Celestia knows how many soothsayers, psychics, mages and mystics, and plenty of dusty, old tomes besides, my leads had narrowed down to one: this rickety hut on the outskirts of a tiny town in northwestern Equestria.

I trotted up to the door of the hut and gave a few sharp knocks with a hoof. Some shuffling and rattling came from inside, followed by a loud *thump*. The whirring cut out and, when I looked up at the chimney, I saw that the green smoke had stopped. After another pause, the door creaked inward on its own to reveal an extremely old-looking goat sitting in a chair opposite the door.

At least, I thought the door opened on its own. Then I saw the rope leading from her hoof to the door through a few pulleys. I failed to keep myself from rolling my eyes.

"You've come a long way," the goat said. "What is it you—"

"Where is it?" I interrupted. I'd been through this enough times to know that cutting to the chase was beneficial to everypony involved. "Quickly, please. The smell is killing me."

Now it was her turn to roll her eyes. "You have been around the block a few times, have you not?" she bleated in indignation.

"Yup."

"Take a train eastward, through the swamps. There is a station there. That is your best bet."

"Thank you. Cool pulleys, by the way."

I had to admit, I was nervous. As the train continued deeper into the forest, I tried not to think about the fact that I'd run out of leads, as well as bits. If this, too, was a dead end…

The train began to slow as we approached the station that old goat had told me about. A pit in my stomach formed when I saw that it was really more of a platform than a station, with a tiny ticket booth scarcely big enough for a pony on one end. It was a miracle the swamp hadn't grown over it, really.

When we'd come to a stop next to the platform, I disembarked, cursing under my breath because I hadn't considered my source's age and probable senility. The curtain on the ticket booth flipped up. "Well… ain't you a looker?" the wizened, bearded earth pony stallion inside said with a perfunctory cackle. Did knowing about this place make you age quicker? It certainly felt like it.

"S-sorry, what?" I stammered in surprise. "I'm not—"

"Yer lookin' fer somethin', gutterhead! I seen yer kind before." The blind snapped down again, and the stallion kicked the door to the ticket booth open. "'Fraid I don't have it right now. Come back later."

Anger welled up in my chest, but it was soon replaced with resignation. "Of course you don't. Shoulda figured."

"Th' next train's in…" he paused to look inside the booth. "About 12 hours."

"So, it's not here."

"Sometimes it's here, and sometimes it ain't. All I can tell ya is it don't like ponies waitin' on it."

"What in Tartarus is that even supposed to mean?" I nearly shouted at him. "I spent my last bits to get here, and all I hear is 'sometimes it's here'? Is it here, or is it not here!?"

He just started cackling at me. "Ahh, Celestia's butt, you'd'a had fun! Sad thing, that." When he'd calmed down, he gave a relaxed wave at the forest. "Nearest town's about 6 hours' walk that-a-way."

I squinted at the lack of specific direction he'd indicated and decided I'd rather not walk through miles and miles of dark, dank, swampy mire to find myself even more miles from civilization. "I think I'll wait anyway, thank you." The stallion just rolled his eyes and went back into his booth, banging the door shut behind him. I, meanwhile, sat down on the platform and began waiting.

Somepony kicked me in the side. My eyes popped open to find the old ticketpony in my face. "Get up!" he said. "It don't like waitin' on ponies, neither!" I rolled over and stood up. As my vision adjusted to the twilight that had fallen since I'd arrived, I was shocked to see a glowing outline of a door inside the ticket booth. I was certain it hadn't been there before.

"Holy Luna..." I muttered in awe. I could scarcely believe the thing I'd been working to find for moons on end was now right in front of me.

"Hurry up!" the ticketpony ordered when I looked around at him. "It don't stay long!"

"Right! Yes," I said, dragging myself back into the moment and trotting into the ticket booth. Softly, as if I might scare it off, I placed a hoof on the door and gave a gentle push. It swung open to reveal a corridor with high shelves on either side and a red rug laid along it.

When I stepped through the doorway, the door swung shut on its own, startling me. It then melted into the wall before my eyes, leaving me with no way out.

Not that I wanted to. I was too caught up in that fact that I'd finally reached it: The Last Place.