Because I Love Her

Gakuen Alice and its characters are the wonderful creations of Tachibana Higuchi.

Ruka Nogi's best friend is Natsume Hyuuga.

Natsume Hyuuga loves Mikan Sakura.

Ruka loves her too.

But Mikan loves Natsume.

Ruka goes to see Masachika Shiki, the Middle School Principal. He seeks his advice on having a one-sided love.

It was the day after Mikan left the academy.

Ruka Nogi was struggling to speak.

"I'm so sorry for troubling you," Ruka began. He stood near the door of the Middle School Principal's office, looking at the floor.

"It's fine, Nogi-kun. Please sit," Masachika Shiki said.

Ruka took hesitant steps and sat one of the chairs in front of the Middle School Principal's desk. He ended up looking at the floor again.

Maybe coming here was just a big mistake. He wondered if he should just excuse himself now to save himself from further shame.

"Would you like some tea?" Shiki said, already standing to prepare it.

"Yes. Thank you very much, Principal."

Ruka took a small sip of tea but it did little to calm his nerves.

Shiki waited patiently for the nervous boy to speak again.

Ruka took a deep breath and placed his cup on the saucer atop the desk.

"I'm here because... It's about Sakura. I... I love her. But I love Natsume too! He's my best friend. He even held back before because he knew that I love Sakura too. I know that they love each other very much. I know that they're the one for each other. I know that... I know that but..."

Tears streamed down Ruka's face. Shiki handed him a handkerchief.

Ruka shook his head vigorously and wiped his tears with his sleeve.

"I'm so sorry, Principal. I shouldn't have come."

Shiki was still offering Ruka his handkerchief.

"Take it," he said gently.

Ruka finally took it and wiped a fresh batch of tears.

"I can't thank you enough, Principal," Ruka whispered.

"I haven't done anything," Shiki said, standing.

Ruka took it as his cue to leave, but Shiki motioned that he should stay seated. To his surprise, Shiki walked around his desk and sat at the chair across from him.

"Nogi-kun. You came here because of what you saw in the past."

It wasn't a question, Ruka noticed. So the Middle School Principal knew! His face fell. He felt so stupid. The principal was just being polite.

"I didn't know until now," Shiki clarified, as if reading his thoughts.

"Oh," Ruka said.

"I'm not angry at you. Thank you for trusting me," Shiki said.

Ruka managed a small smile.

"I'm afraid I don't really have an answer for you, Nogi-kun. You saw my past. Given a second chance, I wouldn't have done anything differently," he paused.

"Except one. I would definitely not let Yuka die," said Shiki. Pain was written all over his face.

"I'm very sorry, Principal. I made you remember something so tragic," Ruka said.

"Then you must do a better job protecting Mikan than I did with Yuka," said Shiki with a sad smile.

"I'm sure that if it's you, you'll be able to. Even if you're not together now. You'll find a way."

"I promise. Thank you for listening to me, Principal. I should go now. My friends will wonder where I am." said Ruka. He stood.

"I'll return this handkerchief to you tomorrow."

"You can keep it. And Nogi-kun?" Shiki stood up as well.

Ruka wondered if the Middle School Principal would tell him never to come here again. He understood and steeled himself.

"Unrequited love will always hurt.

I told Yuka that I was content to be by her side and protect her, to share her burdens, to help her achieve her goal, to dirty my hands for her and to never let her be alone.

I was happy to do all that for her.

Because I love her.

But I would be lying if I told you that it didn't hurt.

Because I love her."

Shiki walked Ruka to the door.

"Your words were very helpful. Thank you very much, Principal. I won't bother you again," Ruka said.

"I'm glad that I can help you. You may come again," said Shiki.

Ruka left the Middle School Building and walked back to the Elementary School Dormitory. His heart felt lighter.

"Yes. I'll protect her.

I'll definitely find a way.

Because I love her," he said to himself.

Shiki watched Ruka from his window. He sighed and knew he'd visit Yuka and Izumi's graves later that night.

Because he loves her.

End