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365 Prompts: 174. (character) Kingsley Shacklebolt

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Cherry Blossoms: Okame Cherry - (rare pair) Your ship must have 30 or less tagged fics.

Paint a Rainbow: Orange (character) Kingsley Shacklebolt

Terry Planting: Cherry (color) pink

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Hogwarts Library the Muggle Edition: Matilda - Roald Dahl (character) any Canon Hogwarts Professor

Leaving on a Jet Plane: Rome (character) Kingsley Shacklebolt

Twisted Tropes: Fast Burn

Elizabeth's Empire: Mine - Taylor Swift (emotion) surprise

Liza's Loves - Stickers: Percy Weasley (setting) Ministry of Magic

EnTitled: American Gothic (plot point) being tricked

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Warning for a whole bunch of crack to follow and a definite out of character warning due to the crackiness of everything. Word count is 2,056 words. I hope you all enjoy Love Potion Number Cupcake.


It isn't a crime to want to be loved by someone. That's what I keep telling myself as I concoct the love potion that I'm going to slip to Cornelius during lunch this afternoon. One bite of this cupcake laced with potion and he'll be head over heels with me. He might even be enough in love with me that he'll leave his simpering little wife behind and marry me.

"Dolores," a smooth familiar voice says from the fireplace and I mentally curse the day they allowed the Floo Network to be used for messages.

"Auror Shacklebolt," I say, turning around and trying to make sure he can't see the cauldron that contains my potion, "what can I do for you today?"

"Minister Fudge asked me to remind you about an appointment that is in fifteen minutes," he said, sounding for all the world like he couldn't believe he was being used as a messenger. "Can I tell him that you'll be there?"

"Of course," I said, letting out a simpering little laugh. That's how my co-workers saw me. This simpering little woman in pink who did whatever the minister of magic told her to do. They didn't truly know the real me or the feelings that were buried under all this pink. They didn't know word one about anything. "You can tell Minister Fudge that I will be there with bells on."

"Alright, Madame Undersecretary," he said and disappeared with a faint pop from my fireplace.

I couldn't help the breath of relief that left me when I was sure that I was alone. People expected me to be above the sort of behavior that would bring one to use a love potion. Plus love potions being illegal and all that I didn't want anyone to find out that I was as bad as the people that I stood against.

"One drop of this on that delicious cupcake we bought from Minister Fudge's favorite bakery and he'll be putty in my hands," I say to myself as I look in the mirror.

Sure. I'm not everyone's idea of natural beauty or beauty at all for that matter. But I had once been a very pretty young lady. My sandy-brown hair which has been cut short because it is easier to control and control is something that must be had, used to be longer at one point. It used to curl and gleam in the sun. Now it only slightly curls around my ears and no longer gleams because I no longer go out in the sun.

My small glimmering blue eyes which had once been my true beauty were now lined with bags and signs of age. They'd once been so lively and full of hope. I don't know where that hope has gone but I'm sure of one thing. That thing is this: if my potion works the way I intend it to that spark of hope could come back and see a return.

"Just have to put the finishing touches in," I said, placing the last two ingredients into the cauldron and following the direction. "Almost there."

I watched as the potion turned the light pink that it was supposed to turn according to the directions. But then again this was after all a Weasley Wizard Wheezes product and they were about as reliable as a swamp in the middle of a castle hallway. Which if I'm being honest still burns my biscuits to this day. The nerve of some people.

I didn't know which cupcake that Minister Fudge would take so I took a chance and laced all of the cupcakes with the love potion. After all, what harm would there be in having a little friendly competition over little old me? The girl who no one thought would be fought over. I cover my mouth as a tittering little laugh escapes me at the thought of all these men fighting over me. Dolores Umbridge and me having to beat them off with sticks.

I close the lid to laced cupcakes as the potion slowly became part of the cupcake. Dripping into the moist fluffy cake and turning into a surprise that would make everyone stop and scratch their heads in confusion. I finish the box of cupcakes off with a huge black bow like the one that sits atop my head. After all, how else was Minister Fudge going to know who the cupcakes were from?

I left my office after pulling on my pink cardigan. It wasn't particularly cold in the building but I felt like the cardigan made me look more distinguished among the other women in the Ministry. After all, some of them didn't even try to look professional while at work. That Tonks girl usually came into work in a tee-shirt and jeans. Some people just didn't have priorities or for that matter didn't know how to set said priorities.

I passed by several workers who all looked the other way when I entered the hallway they were in. That was alright. They didn't need to give me a 'good morning' or friendly hello. I didn't need them. They were only worker bees in my mind. The prize was the leader of the dear wizarding world.

"Dolores," Kingsley said, walking up to me and putting his arm on my shoulder. The feeling of his warm hand like a searing brand on the skin under my cardigan and shirt.

"Kingsley," I said, mastering the appropriate amount of friendliness for the greeting.

"Right this way," he said, leading me through the crowded hallway towards the room where the Minister always held his appointments. "You do have enough of those for everyone, right?"

"Of course I do," I said, letting out a simpering titter which is something that I'm probably expected to do. "Would you like to take a look for yourself, Kingsley?"

"I believe you," he said, sounding like the exact opposite was true.

When we entered the meeting room, I took my customary seat next to Minister Fudge and slid the pink box with its huge black bow in front of him. He seemed to be startled by its presence here.

"Would you like a cupcake, Minister Fudge?" I asked, batting my eyelashes at him as I opened the box. "I baked them myself just for our meeting."

"No thank you, Dolores," he said, rifling through his papers as a few stragglers made their way into the room.

"But they're your favorite, Cornelius," I said, feeling my heart leap into my throat. I hadn't considered what I would do if he didn't take a cupcake.

He stopped rifling through his papers and looked into the box in curiosity. I couldn't help but smile like a Cheshire cat when he picked one out for later. Sure, I would have to make an excuse to see him later. But I was a clever girl and could come up with some reason I had to see him.

I feel an arm reach past me towards the box. The dark-skinned hand that held one of the moist, chocolatey cupcakes drew back towards its owner. Another hand darted into the box and now I felt almost alarmed. Sure, earlier one I'd been excited at the prospect of having people fight over me. But that was then and this was now.

I almost fell to my knees and thanked any deity that had heard my prayers when no one opened their cupcakes and started eating them right away. Minister Fudge had started the meeting and was in the middle of speaking about a problem that had crept up between the merpeople of the English channel and the wizards off the coast nearby.

A soft crinkling of paper caught my ears and could feel my heart sinking in my chest. Someone was about to eat their love potion-laced cupcake. They'd figure it out and I would be in trouble for presenting not only them but the Minister of Magic with a laced cupcake. This would probably be the end of my career if they even found out. I wish I had thought of that before I even decided to make the potion in question.

I feel a tap on my shoulder and try not to turn and look. If I turn and look that would mean the potion would take effect. The tap on my shoulder was rather insistent and I couldn't remember if anyone had taken a cupcake from that side of me.

But then the memory of the black-skinned hand brushing past my shoulder to grab a cupcake before the meeting began resurfaced. The only person with dark skin on that side of me was….I look over and see Kingsley Shacklebolt looking at me like I was the only person in the room.

"These cupcakes are absolutely fabulous, Dolores," he said, licking the pink frosting off his finger and grinning. "You are an absolute baking goddess, do you know that?"

"Auror Shacklebolt, is there something you would like to share with the rest of the meeting?" Minister Fudge asked, glaring angrily in our direction. He didn't like being interrupted in his meetings. A fact that was made plain by the angry red color of his face.

"Just that this woman is the most gorgeous, talented, hardworking creature in this whole building," Kingsley said, indicating me. "She deserves a lot more respect than is being shone to her."

"That's odd," Percy Weasley murmured from behind the Minister. "Shacklebolt never held that opinion before now."

A murmur went through the crowd around the table and thoughts of the problems on the coast were cast aside. Like there was nothing wrong at all except for the fact that Kingsley Shacklebolt thought I deserved respect.

"We can reconvene later when everyone has regained their wits," Minister Fudge said, standing up and taking his papers and potion-laced cupcake with him.

I watch in dread as he marches out of the room and more than likely to his office. That was where he usually went to get control of his anger. I turned as the feeling of eyes on me, watching, grew ever more present.

"Kingsley is right, Dot," Mad-Eye Moody said, slinging an arm around my shoulder and bringing me to his side. "You are an absolute magician with food."

"Dolores is my food goddess," Kingsley said, glaring at Moody.

"Do you want to take this outside, young pup?"

"Of course," Kingsley said, turning to me. "Dolores, fair Dolores, give me a token of your favor and I will fight for you."

"No," Moody growled. "Give me a token of your favor and I will kick this youngster hindquarters for you, my love."

A breathless Percy Weasley renters the room and looks at me helpless…..


I jerk away in my seat and look over at the bubbling potion in the cauldron. It was all just a dream. I hadn't just given Mad-Eye Moody, Kingsley Shacklebolt, the Minister of Magic, and a few others cupcakes laced with the love potion.

I was about to take a deep breath of relief when Percy Weasley, pink-faced and breathing hard, entered my office. He looked like he was about ready to pass out and I couldn't help feeling my heart sink to my feet. Was it not a dream after all?

"How can I help you, Mr. Weasley?" I asked, looking at him trying to keep the guilt off my face. I looked at the potion that was now bubbling in the cauldron. It was the antidote to the love potion I had made in my 'dream'.

"Is the potion ready yet, Madame Undersecretary?" Percy asked, fidgeting nervously as he looked towards the door. "Only the Minister is about to divorce his wife in order to marry his briefcase."

I portioned out the antidote to the potion and gave one to Percy. But the only problem now was to figure out how to get them all to take the antidote.

A little laugh tittered off my lips as the idea struck me. I would get them to take the antidote the same way that I got them to take the potion. I set to work making another batch of cupcakes and prayed that this hare-brained scheme would work and everything would go back to normal. Just the way it should be.


I hope you all enjoyed Love Potion Number Cupcake as much as I enjoyed writing it.