Author's Note: does Remnant have a France? No. Is Fronch Nora one of the best inside jokes Lea and I have come up with at midnight, moments before this was written? Yes. Sorry not sorry, Fronch Nora is a lifestyle and despite being full of inside jokes that I really hope don't detract from the story, I think this one turned out pretty cute. Once again, no editing for my late night fics. We die like men.
Ren rolled over in bed, staring at the ceiling. He groaned quietly to himself, screwing his eyes shut. He wanted to go to sleep. Nora had been getting on his case about going to bed earlier, but now that he'd resolved to get more sleep, it was like he suddenly couldn't.
As a result, he felt tired nearly all the time and he was beginning to worry that Nora would soon catch on. Which, in turn, would mean she would begin to worry.
And he really didn't want that.
They'd made so much progress. He'd started talking about his feelings more, getting more sleep, trying his best to stay reasonably mentally healthy.
He didn't want to ruin all of it by telling her he hadn't been sleeping lately. He was sure it was his fault in a way, that he'd done something wrong, and the last thing he wanted was for Nora to see he was starting to fail at keeping his promise to her; His promise that he'd stay rested and healthy and as unstressed as possible.
He tried to conveniently ignore the main promise has actually been to tell her before he got to a point that was less than "okay".
He tried to slowly relax each of his muscles, letting himself drift off. Right as he was on the cusp of sleep, he felt all ability to doze off leave him.
He opened his eyes once more and glared at the ceiling. Why was this suddenly so difficult?
"Mm… you okay?" He heard Nora murmur, felt her fingers brush his cheek.
"I'm fine, just a bit restless."
She yawned, "Anything I can do?"
"You can go back to sleep, I'll be fine."
"Nah~" she sat up and stretched, "I'm up and you can't sleep, so what if we spend some time together?"
He smiled. "We could cuddle."
She leaned down over his face. "We just put all those pretty lights up in the den, maybe we could cuddle in there?"
He pressed a chaste kiss to her lips. "I don't see why not."
"Cool. Gimme five minutes to get ready."
He almost chuckled, "You can stay in your pajamas, Nora."
She stuck out her tongue. "Not me, the room. The atmosphere." She added a few flourishes of her hands, putting on a ridiculous fake accent, "Ze ambience, ze je ne sais quoi."
"It's midnight, we don't need anything special."
"Ze FOOD und ze BLANKIES, Ren, Ze food und ze blankies." She implored, emphasizing the wrong syllable of every word she spoke.
He chuckled, rolling his eyes. "Fine. I'm coming down in five minutes, okay?"
"Oui oui, und you vill come down vith ze BLANKIES!"
He arrived at the den five minutes later, as agreed, carrying a few extra blankets from upstairs in one arm and adjusting his robe with the other. It was bitterly cold downstairs this time of year, especially at night.
He wondered if her plan was simply to hang out until they fell asleep, thus making extra blankets necessary.
She did adore the fairy lights down there, and they did have lower brightness settings. Maybe she wanted to sleep surrounded by them.
If that were the case, he'd look into getting some small ones for their bedroom window, surprise her for their anniversary or something.
Before he could even enter the den to see what she had done, he felt the telltale warmth of Nora attaching herself to his back.
"Hon hon hon, vat took you so long?" She appeared behind him, hugging his waist.
"May I ask why you suddenly have an accent?"
"Oui oui oui, I am not Nora, hon hon hon, I am her sleep deprived twin sister who wants to steal her man" She grinned, "Sleep deprived twin sister has even less impulse control, oui oui, and thus! I have! UN ACCENT!"
He huffed a laugh, features softening. "If you're tired, we can go back to sleep-"
"NON NON NON," she shook her head, "I can fall asleep perfectly down here, snuggling you, under PILES and PILES of blankie. I can drift off while you can remain watching le movie."
She dropped the over the top persona to look at him, her eyes clear and genuine. "I sleep well with background noise anyway; you know I wear my earbuds to bed. And this gives you something to do besides stare at the ceiling like you're in the angst scene of some Broadway to Hollywood feel good movie musical."
He was sure that he would have melted just then if the room weren't freezing cold. "Thanks, Nora."
"Anytime." She suddenly grinned devilishly. "And now, ze return of FRANCH NORA TWIN SISTER."
He laughed. "What is Fronch Nora twin sister's name?"
She blanched a moment. "Ehhhhh… Frooooora?"
"...Frora?"
"Fronch Nora." She paused, "Hon hon hon?"
He stared at her for a moment. "I… don't know how to respond to you sometimes."
"Zat is okay! You do not need vords or language. You only need-" she gave him a lil squeeze, arms tightening around his middle, "ze cuddle squeeze." She grinned, gesturing to herself. "Good size for squeeze, good caring cuddle."
She gave him another evil smile. "Multiple parts that are good for squeeze." She turned around and gave one of her buttocks a little squeeze for emphasis. "Multiple parts! Good for squeeze."
She sidled up next to him. "You vant to squeeze? You can squeeze. Food accepted as pay. You must pay for such good, nice squeeze. Very nice squeeze."
He smirked. "Are you trying to bribe me with an opportunity to… squeeze your butt… in exchange for food?"
She snapped her fingers, "I do not say bribe but yes, bribe is what I offer. You vant squeeze? You vant cuddle? You vant to keep girlfriend? Zen you give food."
He raised up his arms in surrender. "Alright, Fronch Nora, snacks are coming up."
He returned carrying a bow of popcorn he'd simply retrieved from the pantry, and almost dropped it upon entering the room. She'd managed to figure out the light controls and made the whole room a very soft pink, and she'd figured out how to set up the little projector they'd gotten from Jaune as a moving gift.
He now wondered if she'd planned this for a while and had just decided to spontaneously do it tonight.
"Vat do you fink?" She chirped, before clearing her throat. "Sorry, that's starting to hurt my brain to try and keep doing. Normal Nora is back." Her face darkened. "Fronch Nora is dead."
He huffed a laugh and set down the popcorn on the table next to the couch. "Well, glad to have you back, normal- well, relatively- Nora.."
She giggled. "Anyway, surprise! I figured out the projector."
He wrapped her up in a hug and pulled her close. "Mm.. I love you, you know that?"
In lieu of an answer, he felt her give his butt a little squeeze. "If you didn't love me, you would not have brought food! So you can squeeze."
"Actually, I brought food to cuddle and keep girlfriend. Squeeze can wait."
"But squeeze is new boop!" She said jokingly, gesturing to her butt, "Is not sexy squeeze, is lovey squeeze!"
"I thought Fronch Nora was dead." He smirked.
She shrugged. "Ve have become vone."
He shook his head, "If you say so, totally-normal-nora."
"Time for snuggies?" She asked, picking up the pile of blankets and gesturing for him to sit down on the couch.
He did so, letting her cuddle into his side and layer the blankets atop them both. She nuzzled his chest and relaxed against him, draping an arm over his chest as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
She smiled contentedly, reaching over him and grabbing a handful of popcorn. "The movie's already in if you just press play."
He hit play, wondering what romantic flick she'd chosen, and part of him wanted to burst out laughing when he realized she'd found a documentary about sloths.
He didn't though, if only because he could already feel her relaxing against him.
So far, whatever this late night date was, he found himself enjoying it immensely. He wasn't even remotely disappointed that his date was dozing off; it was actually kind of nice when she slept on top of him.HShe was kind of like a human blanket. Or a space heater.
About halfway into the documentary, he felt his own eyelids getting heavier. He blinked, and suddenly the sun was rising through the window, the projector long since having turned itself off and Nora sleeping with her head in his lap.
Note to self: when the insomnia gets bad, just tell Nora to fire up the sloth documentary and grab some blankets.
He blinked the sleep from his eyes, looking down at Nora and smiling fondly. He gently took her hand and gave it a quick squeeze.
"You did say squeeze was the new boop." He mumbled, letting himself relax back into the cushions and drift off again.