A/N: I know many were unhappy with Elizabeth's choice, but I for one was thrilled! If you are still in doubt, I hope my story will convince you a little that Lucas is the man for Elizabeth.

The Heart of a Woman

Chapter 1: Elizabeth

Once Elizabeth Thornton knew what she wanted, she always threw her whole heart into it.

And Elizabeth wanted Lucas Bouchard.

After their confessions on the bridge and in the library, they would meet as often as they could. He would steal kisses in the morning before he walked her to school, and he would be there to escort her home afterwards, taking her hand once they were out of sight of the school house. After she sent Robert on his way, and looked in on little Jack, she was in Lucas's arms again. He would stay with her as long as he dared, and they'd spend a pleasant hour or two talking, laughing, and playing with Jack until Lucas had to go to the saloon for the evening.

Elizabeth would lie in bed at night, sleep illusive, thinking of him. By now she knew that his beard was as soft as it looked, especially when she felt it against her cheek, nuzzling against her neck, gently resting against her décolletage and her rapidly beating heart as they sat together on her settee. She knew his hair was as thick and smooth as it looked, that it slid through her hands like silk. She could spend hours combing through it with her fingers as he kissed her deeply.

But stolen kisses weren't enough. She wanted more of him, and when she finally drifted off to sleep at night, she had him in her dreams. She would awaken, shaking and hot. She wondered if he felt the same longings that she did, and after dreams like that, she found it difficult to focus the rest of the day. With school back in session, there was little time to spend together, and most nights she had to devote to grading papers and planning lessons for the next day. The saloon was busier of late, keeping Lucas occupied as well.

And so, after two weeks of this frustrating routine, Lucas whispered a tantalizing suggestion in her ear before he walked back to the saloon: "Come away with me." His warm breath stirred the hair around her ear, and she shivered before what he'd said fully registered. When it did, she stepped back from his embrace, eyes wide, cheeks flushed.

"What?" she asked breathlessly.

His eyes were almost black, and her heart skipped a beat at what she saw there.

"Union City. The Yorkton. Like we did when we met Virginia Woolf."

He held both her hands in his, and she felt the enticing brush of his thumbs over her suddenly damp palms.

She was sorely tempted. They couldn't be truly alone here, not in her house when little Jack was there, not to mention how the town gossips were on high alert, probably closely monitoring how long Lucas stayed at her house every evening. They couldn't go to his place—he lived in a hotel over the saloon after all, and no one would ignore the temerity of her going up the stairs for all to see. This left the library—a romantic place for a dinner date, a few passionate kisses, but not much more. As for any outside assignations, the cold weather of autumn now precluded those. A weekend away would be heavenly, but with so much scrutiny placed on her after the threat of Mr. Landis, she felt on tenterhooks, anxious not to be caught up in any kind of scandal that would threaten her teaching.

"It's not like it was back then," she lamented. "We weren't…together."

He raised an eyebrow. "Not for lack of trying, at least on my part. And we were two unmarried people, traveling alone unchaperoned, staying overnight in a hotel together. I wonder what the gossips were saying back then?"

He was very persuasive, and not just because his voice was tantalizingly soft and deep, his eyes filled with love and desire mixed with a spark of amusement.

"But now, things are different," she countered reasonably.

"Yes," he agreed, bending to kiss her lightly on the lips, "they certainly are."

There was no doubt what this trip would mean for them, and the prospect both thrilled and frightened her. Not that she was afraid to be intimate with him—no, it was frightening how much she wanted to be.

She'd been lonely in her widowhood, but her baby had kept her mind from dwelling too much on the lost intimacies of her marriage bed. The nights after her husband's death had been the hardest, however, and the loneliest. In their short time together, she'd been surprised at how much she'd enjoyed lovemaking—a rarity she'd heard among some of the married ladies she knew, who would lament their "wifely duties." Elizabeth was surprised to discover that she was a very passionate woman, that she'd craved her husband in a way that was almost embarrassing.

She'd missed the closeness, the trust and security of being held in the quiet of the night, skin against skin, sated and well-loved. That feeling had a lot to do with the fact that she'd loved Jack completely, that they had waited so long, gone through so much to be together.

She and Jack had clashed from the moment they'd met. They'd hurt each other and loved each other in equal measures before finally finding their way to the altar. But Lucas was not Jack, and she was finding out that there were different ways to love a man. She didn't want to cheapen the memories of her love for her husband by comparing those feelings with what she felt for Lucas now, but it was human nature to do so, to compare the past with the present, to try to find patterns or reasons for the differences.

The conclusion she'd come to after so many nights honestly examining her feelings, was that she was wildly attracted to Lucas, and she no longer had the veil of innocence that kept her from truly imagining what it would be like to be with him. Her feelings for Lucas seemed more adult somehow, more mature. But her attraction for Lucas wasn't just physical. To expand on what she'd said to him in the library, he was more than just warm and caring, kind and giving, thoughtful of her needs and quick to adjust or apologize when he'd made a mistake. There was nothing arrogant or controlling about him, yet he challenged her mind, and she thrilled to their debates over literature, art, and history. He was naturally charming and devastatingly handsome to be sure, but there was an honesty and humility there that was lacking in many men as physically beautiful as he.

He'd courted her slowly, had been patient to a fault, but she'd never doubted his interest in her, his desire to be with her, that she would be worth the wait. Their love story had been different from hers and Jack's, but it had been no less real, no less powerful. She wouldn't let the tragedy of losing Jack stand in the way of finding true love and happiness once more. Jack would have wanted this for her, she knew it in her heart.

"May I think about it?" she asked shyly.

"Of course. I'm not trying to push you, Elizabeth. It's a standing rule that we can take things as slowly as you want. But I can't deny that I want to be completely alone with you, that I've been losing a lot of sleep lately thinking about it." She was pleased to see the hint of a blush on his cheekbones. She grinned at him mischievously.

"I know what you mean," she said, and his eyes fairly glittered at her daring confession.

Her words seemed to enflame him suddenly, and she found herself being kissed within an inch of her life, his tongue tangling sensually with hers, his hands roaming over her back, sliding up her sides, cupping her breasts for the very first time. She moaned her pleasure into his mouth.

Jack's sudden cries from his upstairs bedroom broke them guiltily apart, and they stood for a moment in a daze, hearts pounding, breaths loud and labored. The toddler's cries turned to a wail, and Elizabeth bolted into action, heading for the stairs.

Grabbing the railing, she looked reluctantly over her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, Lucas. See you tomorrow?"

"Yes you will. Think about my suggestion, will you?" he said in amusement, as Jack's calls for mama swelled in the background.

She laughed. "Don't worry, I will. Mama's coming, Jack!" She didn't hear the click of the door as Lucas let himself out.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Later that evening, she took Jack next door for a visit with Rosemary. Lee was working late, so the women had a little time for what her friend called "girl talk." Of course, Elizabeth was anxious to talk to someone about Lucas's earlier proposal. Not to mention, if she did agree to go to Union City with him, Rosemary and Lee would be the only ones she'd trust to keep Jack overnight.

"You look a little agitated," Rosemary commented. "Do I need to get the cookies?"

Elizabeth chuckled as she threw a blanket down on the floor and gave Jack some of the toys Rosemary and Lee kept for him there. When she stood again, Rosemary was already setting a tray of hot tea, shortbread, and a box of chocolates on the coffee table.

Elizabeth immediately went for the chocolate. Rosemary's eyebrows flew up. "One of those days, eh? I could always spike the tea with a bit of sherry…"

"No. I need a clear head for this."

"Something tells me this has to do with Lucas. Not trouble in paradise so soon I hope?"

"No. Not at all. The complete opposite, in fact."

Rosemary settled into the settee in anticipation. "Do tell."

Elizabeth finished chewing her second chocolate and took a deep breath. "Lucas asked me to go away with him for the weekend. Alone. In a hotel."

Rosemary wasn't the least bit scandalized. "Oh, Elizabeth! That's so wonderful! We'll keep Jack, of course—"

"I haven't decided yet. I'm sure Lucas would have certain…expectations."

"And you would not?"

Elizabeth blushed. "I would be lying if I said I wouldn't. But how would that look, Rosemary?"

"You could leave in the middle of the night. Or you could go on the stagecoach and he'd drive and meet you there in his car—" The romance of it all definitely appealed to Rosemary's love of adventure, and her eyes sparkled with her growing plan.

Elizabeth held up a staying hand. "We could, but it seems a little hypocritical, considering how we went to see Virginia Woolf together last year."

"Ah, but it's different now because your intentions are different."

"Well, yes."

Rosemary's expression grew serious. "You're a grown woman, Elizabeth. You're no longer an innocent maiden. I'm not saying flaunt what you're up to, but you could be discreet about it, and I for one would not judge you. As a matter of fact, I would help you."

"What about Lee?"

Rosemary smiled, waving a dismissive hand. "Oh, don't let my husband's seemingly tight-laced demeanor fool you." She lowered her voice for Jack's benefit. "Lee is the most passionate man I've ever known. When we were first courting, we could barely keep our hands off each other. I'm not ashamed to admit that we uh…anticipated our wedding vows."

Elizabeth blushed at this bit of intimate detail. "Oh," she said simply.

"So Lee would be the last to judge either of you. He's as much a romantic as I am, you see. And remember, he was quite encouraging the last time you two went away. We could see the sparks flying between you two even then. We're both just so happy for you, truly. And we'd never pass up the opportunity to spend time with this little doll."

She reached down and adoringly caressed Jack's blond head. Rosemary desperately wanted a child of her own, and Elizabeth knew Jack's staying there would be no imposition.

"Still, I don't want to be seen as some sort of merry widow."

"Now where did you dig up that old phrase? This is the twentieth century, Elizabeth."

"But in small towns, there's still, unfortunately, a bit of nineteenth century mentality remaining—including my own at times. I mean, I'm not sure this would be seen as moral behavior, not to mention not setting a good example as a teacher."

"Well that's something I can't help you with. But I personally think it would be beautiful and incredible for you. I've seen the way Lucas looks at you. He loves you deeply."

"And yet, he hasn't actually said the words. Nor have I."

"Is that really what's preventing you from going with him?"

It had bothered Elizabeth a little, but she knew in her heart he had strong feelings for her, and they'd both admitted to falling for each other. The words would come when they were both ready. It was a big step, for her especially. But maybe Rosemary was right. Hearing those words might give her more confidence to take this leap, but she didn't ever want to think he'd just be saying them to get her into his bed. She cringed inside, thinking about it. For one thing, the very idea was so uncharacteristic of Lucas that she banished it from her mind immediately. When he told her he loved her, it would be because he was ready to say it and not because he felt pressured into it.

"No. But it wouldn't hurt to hear him say it."

Something quickened in Rosemary's face. Elizabeth's eyes narrowed in warning.

"Now Rosemary, don't even think about speaking to Lucas about this. I'd be mortified, not to mention furious with you."

"Not even a little bitty bug in his ear?"

"No. Absolutely not."

"A little birdy?"

"No. Neither bird nor beast, no matter how small or large, will pay any calls on Lucas regarding this matter. Promise me, Rosemary."

Her friend sighed in disappointment. "Oh, all right. I promise."

"Good. Now, about that sherry…"

A/N: Chapter 2 will be coming soon. Please let me know what you think. Thanks for reading!