DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS.

I woke up early and decided to go in search of the meadow. I threw on some clothes and grabbed my back pack before heading out the door. I drove to the spot Edward directed me to those many months ago. I parked my car in the same spot as I did last time. I grabbed my back pack and locked up the truck before heading in search of the meadow. I made sure to take it slow so I wouldn't fall. I got lost a few times but after about 2 hours, I finally found it. I stood at the edge of the forest and taking in the sight of it. Everything in the meadow was dead, just like how I felt on the inside. I slowly made my way to the spot Edward and I laid at. I gently sat down on the ground to take it all in. I reached into my back pack to pull out the knife I brought with me. I left the note for Charlie inside my back pack just in case it started raining. I turned the knife over in my hand repeatably, contemplating my discussion. The hole that Edward left in his wake was very suffocating and I couldn't bare it any more. I was no longer eating or sleeping. I couldn't go on any longer like this. It had to end today.

"Edward, I know you can't hear me but maybe Alice will be able to see this and tell you. I'm sorry I wasn't enough. If maybe I acted another way, you wouldn't have gotten bored with me and left with not only your family but mine as well. I do not blame you though for wanting to leave me." I made a slash along my left arm. "You were always so perfect and I wasn't." I made another slash along my right arm. "I would leave myself if I could because I'm not nothing but a weak pathetic little human." I cut my left arm again but going deeper this time. I relished in the feel of the pain and warm blood running down my arm. "Just know I love you and I forgive you. I will never regret meeting you. Goodbye my Edward."

I laid back onto the grass and made another deeper cut along my right arm as well. I closed my eyes and waited on death to come. I no longer feared death but came to think of him as an old friend. Death was the only way to no longer feel the unbearable pain in my chest. I slowly felt myself drifting in and out of sleep. Finally I fell asleep and I felt peace for the first time in months.