Tim leans against one of the stucco arches at the venue, as he takes in his surroundings. He could finally relax, after an insane handful of days scrambling to change venues, handle last-minute details, and deal with a pregnant bride with unpredictable mood swings.
He'd still managed to pull it off, calling in favors and finding a beautiful venue last minute, one last miracle as Man of Honor. Angela had been beaming all day, as she should, and now the majority of the guests were burning off the cake and champagne on the dance floor, including the one wedding guest Tim hadn't been able to take his eyes off of since she arrived.
Lucy is in her element, dancing with Jackson to some high-energy tune Tim isn't familiar with. Her emerald green dress swishes around her as she moves, her curls bouncing and expression one of wild abandon. It is a mesmerizing sight.
Watching her causes the ache inside him to intensify, the ache that had started yesterday in the parking garage at the station.
She'd been waiting at his truck for him, leaning against the driver's side door. If he'd known, he could have put off those last few phone calls about the wedding until he got home.
"Something on your mind, Chen?" he asked as he stopped and stood in front of her.
Lucy took a deep breath. "I need to tell you something you won't like."
Tim bristled, somehow already knowing what was coming.
"I'm leaving in a couple of days to go undercover long-term. I don't know when I'll be back."
Tim's jaw clenched. "Did you request this?"
"No, Grey and Harper approached me. There was an opportunity, and I took it."
"You haven't had the proper training yet!" Tim began to pace.
Lucy put a hand on his arm to still him. "I know, but Harper gave me as much training as she could, and I remember everything you taught me as well."
"It won't be enough! You have no idea what you're getting into. If they get one whiff of suspicion, they'll…they'll…." He can't even finish the sentence. He can't even entertain that right now.
"I understand what they're capable of. And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared. But I still want to do this. I-I need to do this, for me."
"You don't, Lucy. Everyone knows you're a good cop. You know you're a good cop. You've proven that over and over again. Why do you need to do this?"
"Because I'm still not sure I can. I want to prove to myself that UC is something I can handle, especially after what I've already been through. My parents still doubt my choice as a cop, and even you didn't think I have what it takes to do UC."
"I take it all back. I know you can do this. But why would you want to? You've seen what the job can do to people. You saw Isabel."
"Tim," Lucy said softly. "I can't expect you to fully understand, especially given what you've had to deal with. But can you just trust me that I know what I'm doing?"
"Did you come here to get my blessing?" He heard how harsh his words sounded the moment they left his lips, and he inwardly cringed. He looked at Lucy, and the hurt was evident on her face.
"Your blessing? No. But it would be nice to have your support. I really don't get why you're so worked up over this. This is one hundred percent my decision to make. You don't have a stake in it. You're not even my TO anymore. I've hardly even seen you the past couple of weeks since you've had so much to do for Angela's wedding."
Tim pinched the bridge of his nose. "I…can't. I'm sorry. I'm sure you'll be fine. Best of luck on the assignment, Lucy."
"Tim," Lucy pleaded.
"I need to do a couple more tasks for Angela tonight, so I have to go. But I'll see you at the wedding tomorrow, right?"
Lucy sighed, letting him pass to get in the truck. "Yeah, tomorrow."
Tim barely slept the night before, tossing and turning all night. How did this happen? How was yet another important person in his life entering undercover work? Was he a magnet for adrenaline junkies?
He should be furious. He wants to be furious. It still didn't make complete sense to him why Lucy would choose this. But the anger just isn't there, not really.
It's pain instead.
What he had wanted to do in that parking garage was beg her to stay, make her understand this path could break even her, the strongest person he knew. He'd wanted to pull her in his arms until she agreed to never leave.
He'd been slowly coming to terms over the past few weeks that what he felt for Lucy went far beyond her being his former rookie, and even beyond friendship. Lucy had a pull on him that he could no longer deny. He missed riding with her, just like he'd written on her evaluation. He missed everything about her, even the incessant talking that somehow filled up the shop with warmth.
But the path he took with Isabel nearly destroyed him. He couldn't do this again, could he? Worry day in and day out about Lucy's safety, wondering if she'll ever come home.
The truth was regardless of the status of their relationship, he would still be concerned for her safety. He was always concerned for her safety. It was constantly there, like the relentless flow of a fire hydrant. It was part of him now, and he couldn't shut it off if he tried. He already knows he won't be able to make it through this unscathed.
She was going to leave, and he couldn't stop it. She had a drive inside of her that he admired, one that was similarly reflected in him. He remembers that need to prove himself, to prove that he was himself, after his tours, and later when he joined the LAPD.
The real question was whether Lucy was worth all of this.
The answer sprang up immediately from the deepest part of him. Absolutely.
Lucy doesn't need him shutting down, shutting her out. That can't be his parting gift to her. He has to make this right. He doesn't want his frustration to be her distraction on the job. She doesn't deserve that.
When he saw her arrive earlier, looking so stunning he forgot to breathe, it only cemented his decision to fix this. Asking her to save him a dance was the hopeful olive branch. He'd caught the surprise on her face as he quickly kept moving before she could protest. He'd hoped it was enough for the moment, as his duties had whisked him away.
After a frenzy of vows, photos, cake, toasts, and mingling, the roar of the wedding had quieted to a contented hum. The strings of lights draped over everyone were now lit as the colors of dusk took over the sky.
Lucy is now off to the side, sipping on water as she catches her breath from dancing. He starts moving towards her before he realizes what his feet are doing, as if there is no choice but to let her reel him in.
"Is now a good time?" he asks as he reaches her, and she shivers. He doesn't dare allow himself to think it's because of his proximity.
Lucy turns to face him, a smirk on her face. "Can you even dance?"
He breathes a sigh of relief. She's trying to make this normal.
"You'd be surprised."
"Then surprise me," she says, holding out her hand.
He takes it and tries not to notice how easily their fingers fit together.
Tim leads her to the dance floor, placing one hand securely on her waist, the other hand holding their arms out. But it feels too stiff, too formal for them. In just over a year, they've built a history some people take a lifetime to acquire, so he pulls their arms back in, and holds her hand against his chest.
The song changes then, another one he's not familiar with. It's a faster tempo than normal for a slow dance, but he can work with it. He leads them into a gentle sway, and glances at Lucy, who does appear to be familiar with the song.
"Jackson," she mutters.
He glances over and sure enough, Jackson is right by the DJ's table, lifting his champagne glass toward them with a smile. Tim strains to catch a bit of the song, wondering what was going on.
Now, I stared at you
From across the room
Until both my eyes were faded
"What about Jackson?" he can't help but ask.
Lucy groans. "I recently told him how I loved this song in high school and how I always wanted to dance to this with someone…someday."
"Just anyone?"
"Someone important."
Tim exhales as the chorus swells, the lyrics immediately catching his attention.
'Cause I swear it's you
I swear it's you
I swear it's you that I've waited for
I swear it's you
I swear it's you
I swear it's you that my heart beats for
And it ain't gonna stop
No, it just won't stop
"It's a good song," he says.
"This is a good tux," she comments, taking her free hand to give his bowtie a little straightening.
"Thanks."
"The guy wearing it isn't so bad, either."
He leans in, his voice more gravelly than he expected. "And you look absolutely beautiful."
She takes in a sharp breath that turns into a grin, her eyes shining brighter than ever. "Thank you. Does that mean you don't hate me?"
"Nope, not possible."
She rests her head on his chest while he pulls her in a little more securely.
You take this hand
You take this heart
Stir my bones from a thousand miles apart
It feels so cold
Without you like it's ten shades of winter
And I need the sun
With the song, Lucy's gentle expression as she looks up at him, the curious eyes on them from around the dance floor, and his churning feelings, it's all a bit much. He feels the venue caving in on him.
"Come with me," he whispers.
He can hear her heels clacking behind him as he enters an unused corridor. When they stop, he turns to her and pulls both of her hands into his.
"You're wrong, you know."
"What?" she asks, looking confused and slightly defensive.
"I do have a stake in this, a pretty big one. And you have my support. So I'm hoping you'll do me a favor."
"What is it?"
"After this op is done, I need you to come back."
She looks at him like he's crazy. "Of course I'll come back."
"No, I mean you come back as Lucy Chen. You don't lose yourself out there. You don't let them take that from you. Yes, you always need to keep your head in the game, but anytime you feel yourself slipping away, you think of a place, an object, a person from your real life, anything that will ground you. Do you hear me?"
Lucy smiles, "I'll think of you."
"Me?"
"You keep me grounded more than anyone. Plus, you literally brought me back to life. I would think bringing me back to reality would be easier."
"I still hate that you're going."
"Honestly a part of me hates it, too. There's going to be so much I'm missing. I might miss the birth of Angela's baby. Tamara's doing really well right now, and I want to keep helping her. And then there is you, Tim Bradford, who I'll miss the most."
Tim reaches up to cradle her cheek while he leans in to kiss her other cheek.
"I'll miss you, too, Lucy."
Her face is close to crumbling, and she leans in to touch her forehead with his. "Ugh, I don't want to leave yet, but I head out early tomorrow, and there's a lot I still need to do."
Tim nods, and slowly releases her, holding on until the last second possible.
"Give extra hugs to Kojo for me?"
"I will. You stay safe for me?"
"I will."
"See you soon," he says, as he turns to go.
"Tim?"
As he turns back around, she leans on her tiptoes to brush her lips against his. The kiss is soft and feels full of all the things they haven't said to each other yet. It doesn't seem like a goodbye kiss, but rather like one full of promise.
"Don't give up on me, ok?" Lucy asks breathlessly as they pull apart.
Tim smiles. "No chance. I'll be right here when you get back."
He knew there were a lot of difficult days and nights ahead of him, that missing her was going to be his new full-time job. He knew he wouldn't feel totally at peace until she was home again and safe in his arms. But he couldn't help but feel hopeful. They were right on the cusp of something amazing, and as soon as she came back home they could finally begin.
Hi, friends! I know there have been a lot of Chenford dance fics within the fandom, but I wanted to put my own spin on it. The song is Won't Stop by OneRepublic. Thank you for reading! Please let me know what you thought!