Twitter: bensonismyworld
To anyone else, tonight seemed perfect. There was a slight chill in the air. No clouds in the sky. Fin and Phoebe shared beautiful vows. The reception space was overlooking a lake, string lights hung above the tables and dance floor, oak trees lined the perimeter of the water. Everyone seemed to be having the time of their lives, especially after the year they've had. But something seemed off about Olivia.
She was unusually quiet and everyone could see that she wasn't herself. Her second glass of wine had barely been touched. She was sitting alone at her table and kept looking over her shoulder as if she was waiting for something to appear. Fin could tell it was because she was missing Elliot. He had a front row seat to their partnership after all. When he saw Olivia sitting alone, he walked up behind her and the feeling of his hand on her shoulder startled her.
"Hey. You okay?"
"Uh, yeah. Tonight was beautiful, Fin. I'm so happy for you and Phoebe."
"Thanks. But I know you, Liv. Something's up. You know you can tell me."
She didn't say anything. She was staring at her love ring and spinning it around on her finger. Fin noticed.
"I know you miss him. I wish he could've been here, too."
She turned around to face Fin and she had tears in her eyes. "Yeah. It just sucks that he couldn't see you on your big day."
"It also sucks that he couldn't see how nice you look tonight."
She smiled at him and got up from her chair. "I'll be right back. Just gonna go for a walk."
Unbeknownst to Olivia, Fin had texted Elliot an hour or so earlier to ask him if he was sure he couldn't make it for one drink. Fin never got a response, so he assumed Elliot wasn't coming.
There was a floating dock on the lake not too far from the reception area. The dock was long enough and the trees were filled in enough that she could walk all the way out to the end and no one would be able to see her.
The water was calm. No wind. It's as if time was standing completely still. The sun was just about set. There was still a small bit of light in the sky, but it was dark enough for Olivia to notice the bright crescent moon. She looked up and realized that's how her heart felt. Just like the moon, part of her heart was missing. The one person she'd hoped to see that night was nowhere to be found.
She reached the end of the dock and rested her hands on top of the metal railing and was staring at the moon's reflection in the water. She stood in silence for a few seconds, trying so hard not to cry.
"I miss you, El," she whispered to herself. Her eyes shifted from the moon's reflection to her own, picturing what it'd be like if he was standing right next to her. She knew he would have had so much fun at the wedding. Melinda was there. George was there. In between trips to the bar, Munch and Cragen kept asking her why he didn't show. She didn't have a straight answer.
Back at the reception, Fin was standing alone next to the cake and saw Elliot out of the corner of his eye walking toward him. They shook hands.
"Fin! Congrats!"
"Hey, man. Glad you decided to showed up. Didn't think you would make it."
"I'm glad I decided to come. You look great. Sorry I didn't answer your text. I actually was already on my way here." He paused and was looking around the space, wondering where she was. His eyes were drawn to the entrance of the dock Olivia had walked to. He quickly realized that's where she was. His eyes lingered there for enough time for Fin to notice.
"She went over there about 5 minutes ago. She'll be really happy to see you."
"Yeah. I'll go check on her. Thanks."
Elliot came and went in enough time for no one but Fin to notice he had showed up. He needed to see Olivia and only Olivia. He sensed every emotion she was feeling. The thought of her being sad set something off in him that would only calm down once he saw her. Their souls were that connected that they felt each other's presence no matter if they were together or not.
Elliot looked up at the moon as he was walking and had the same feeling Olivia had. Part of his heart was waiting for him on that dock. The only part of his heart that truly mattered to him. He paused right before taking his first steps onto the dock, knowing it would move and she would know someone else was there.
There was a shift in the energy as he stepped onto the dock and Olivia's breathing got heavier. Her hands gripped onto the railing. She knew it was him. The water rippled beneath her and she followed the current out to the middle of the lake, trying to distract herself.
Elliot was in awe at how beautiful she looked underneath the moonlight. Her floral dress looked like it was made for her, the same way Elliot felt like Olivia was made for him. She turned her head slightly toward him, but not all the way around.
The walk to the end of the dock felt everlasting for him. As he got closer, all he was focused on was her waist and wanting so badly to wrap his arms around her. She heard his footsteps getting louder, her body begging for his embrace. He stood directly behind her, taking a strand of her hair in his hands. He felt her shake at his slightest touch.
"What made you decide to come?"
"Oh, so I don't even get a 'Hello'?", he asks, jokingly. He lets go of her hair and puts his hand on her arm.
Olivia chuckled slightly. "Sorry." She turned to face him. "Hi," she whispered. He nodded.
The sight of Elliot Stabler standing in front of her in a 3-piece suit was enough to render her speechless. Her eyes made their way from his torso to his lips. When she finally looked him in the eyes, she felt his right hand interlocking with her left hand. They stood there for a moment, looking at each other. This was always their language. They knew how to say so much without saying anything at all with just their eyes alone. The only sounds they heard were the faint music from the reception and the water splashing on the edges of the dock. Finally, Olivia broke the silence.
"You didn't answer my question."
Elliot smiled at her and said, "Something told me this is where I should be. Whatever that something is, it was right."
Olivia smiled and put her right hand flat against his cheek. "Well, I'm glad you listened to it," she said, giving his cheek a pat before turning back around to face the water.
She was on the verge of tears. She could not believe that the moment he was on her mind in the most intense way, he just showed up. She put her hands back up onto the railing. The cold metal made her jump slightly.
"Liv, what is it?" he asked.
She felt a single tear fall down the right side of her face. "Come here, El."
That was the first time she had called him El in front of him. He knew how much that nickname meant to their relationship and hearing that was enough to make him walk up directly behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He put his hands on top of hers and as soon as she felt his touch, she slipped her hands out from underneath his and grabbed onto his arms.
"I came out here to get some space from everyone. I couldn't think about anyone else but you tonight. I can't believe you actually showed up."
"Well, I wasn't gonna. But I was home, thinking about you and how beautiful you must look." He kissed the back of her head.
"Elliot.."
"What?" He smiled and kissed the back of her head again. "You do look beautiful, Liv."
"You look pretty handsome yourself, Detective."
She knew calling him Detective would make him laugh.
He took his arms out from under her grip, and took hold of her left hand while he leaned down and kissed her right shoulder. In between kisses, he said, "Fin had texted me about an hour ago asking if I was sure I couldn't make it, but I was already on my way here."
He pressed his lips against her shoulder again, but didn't kiss her there. She put her right hand on his head, holding it in place. This was uncharted territory for them. They always knew what lines to never cross when they were partners. This should seem so foreign, but somehow, it doesn't. They've both dreamt for so long what this would feel like and that's why it all seems so easy. Their left hands were still interlocked. Olivia lifted them up and kissed his hand before pressing their hands against her chest.
Whatever bit of sunlight that was left in the sky was gone. It was practically dark now, but the sky was lit up still because of the moon, like the universe knew Elliot and Olivia holding each other would brighten up the sky. Both of them wished they could stay holding each other forever, but it was getting late and the party would be ending soon.
Elliot lifted his head up from her shoulder and let go of her hands, and Olivia turned to face him. Their faces were almost touching. It was just a matter of who would make the move first. She thought about all the times in the past that she had snuck small glances at his lips. She didn't have to hide it anymore. His hands were in her hair, they pressed their foreheads against each other, breathing the same oxygen. Their souls were always connected, but this was the moment when they truly became one.
"I am so in love with you, Olivia Benson."
"I know. So am I, El. I'm in love with you, too."
She grabbed his face and their lips met. She knew kissing Elliot would feel electrifying, but she didn't think it'd feel like this. Nothing else mattered to either of them in this moment. Elliot's hands moved from her hair to her waist, pulling her in closer. Each kiss felt better than the last. Their breathing became so heavy that they had to pulled away. The love in Olivia's eyes was more intense than Elliot had ever seen. 22 years of knowing this woman, and she had never seemed so beautiful. They didn't even need to speak at this point. They had already said enough with their eyes and lips, and they were more in sync than they had ever been.
"Come on, Liv." He kissed her cheek. "I wanna see Munch and Cragen before we head to the hotel."
The hotel Fin and Phoebe had rented out for the wedding was not too far away. Olivia had already gone and checked herself into the room before taking an Uber over to the venue. He wanted to take her back so badly and continue where they left off on the dock, but he didn't want to go too far in one night. Noah was with Lucy, but even so, he knew their first time had to be special. Tonight would have been the perfect night, but she was tired, and he sensed that she was perfectly fine with just going to sleep.
Elliot kissed her one more time before taking her hand and walking off of the dock and back to the reception. He squeezed her hand every few seconds, and she squeezed back. As they approached the dance floor, Munch yelled, "Elliot Stabler in the flesh! Holy shit, what year is it?"
Elliot yelled back, "Man am I happy to see you. Hey, where's Cragen?" "Oh, he was tired and a tad too tipsy. He went back to the hotel."
They hugged each other. Elliot hadn't been this happy since he'd been back. He had just been kissing the woman of his dreams and Munch was making jokes. It's like no time had gone by.
'Alright. Well, I gotta get us back to the hotel, but let's catch up over breakfast in the morning, alright? Tell Cragen too." "Great! It's a double date!' Munch winked at Olivia. He knew just as much as Fin did what Elliot and Olivia mean to each other. Fin had told him everything about what happened when Elliot came back and what Elliot and Olivia had gone through to try and repair their relationship.
They said goodbye to Fin and he introduced Elliot to Phoebe.
"Congratulations, nice to meet you, you guys look so great together. We're gonna get going, Fin. We'll see you guys in the morning," Elliot said.
Olivia gave Fin and Phoebe each a hug and said, "Thanks again for a great evening, guys. Have a great rest of your special night."
Fin smiled at them, "Thanks, Liv. And thanks again for coming, Elliot."
"No problem. Night."
Fin nodded at Olivia and she smiled back before turning around and wrapping her arm around Elliot's waist.
They walked out to Elliot's car. He opened the door for her and kissed her before she got inside. "Let's go home, Olivia."
On the drive back to the hotel, they were mostly silent. He kept one hand on her thigh most of the time. He glanced over every few seconds to smile at her. They were stopped at a red light when Elliot asked, "Liv, did you have fun tonight." He didn't get a response. He looked over at her and she was asleep. He couldn't believe how peaceful she looked. He had seen her sleep before, in the cribs, but this time was different. He heard the car behind him beeping, and quickly realized the light was green. He continued to drive.
They made it to the hotel safe and sound. He found the closest spot he could to the hotel's entrance so Olivia wouldn't have to walk very far. He didn't want to wake her up, but he knew he had to.
"Liv, wake up. We're here." "Hmm? Already? Oh, sorry, did I fall asleep?"
"Yeah." they smiled at each other. "It's okay."
"Get me out of these damn heels, pronto."
"10-4, Captain."
Elliot leaned over the center console to kiss her cheek. He grabbed his overnight bag from the back seat, got out of the car, and walked over to the passenger side to let Olivia out.
She got out of the car and immediately took hold of his hand. They smiled and began walking to the hotel's entrance. Once they got into the elevator, they leaned against the wall next to each other and Olivia rested her head on Elliot's shoulder.
"Are you happy?" Elliot asked.
"More than happy."
"Me too."
The elevator opened and they walked out, turning the corner and down the hallway to the last door on the left. Olivia put the key card in, opened the door, and immediately kicked off her shoes.
"That desperate, huh?"
"Please, I couldn't stand wearing them anymore."
"Need help taking anything else off?"
"Yeah, can you get my zipper for me?"
He didn't want this to lead to anything more than helping her undress. He unzipped her dress for her and got her silk pajamas that were already on the bed.
"Don't be a weirdo, turn around," Olivia said jokingly. She didn't want him to see her totally undressed. Not yet. It was too soon. They needed to take baby steps.
Elliot respected her wishes as she put her pajamas on.
"I'm too tired to even take my makeup off," Olivia said, slipping her pants on. "Okay I'm dressed, you can come kiss me now."
Elliot walked over to her, put his arms around her neck, and kissed her multiple times. He could feel her smiling as he kissed her, and it made him feel like the luckiest man in the world. His kisses were the reason Olivia Benson was smiling. It's all he ever wanted.
Elliot pulled away.
"Something wrong, El?"
"No. You're just so beautiful."
Olivia couldn't help but smile and blush. "Come on. I'm tired. Let's go to sleep."
"Okay."
Elliot took off his suit and grabbed his undershirt and sleep shorts from his overnight bag. He went into the bathroom to change. Staring into the mirror, he could see his skin clearing up. All the pain he'd been holding onto for the past month and a half was slowly exiting his body, and it was because of Olivia.
He opened the bathroom door and Olivia was already in bed. The white hotel sheets looked so soft draped over her, and the pillow next to her was fluffed, ready for him to lay on it. Elliot was ready for the best night's sleep he had in a long time. She was starting to fall asleep, so he got into the bed slowly, trying not to disturb her.
The bed was comfortable. He fluffed the pillow once more before laying down.
"You comfy over there?" Olivia asked.
"I'll be even more comfy when you scooch over here."
Olivia laughed. Elliot reached his arm over her pillow and she moved over, kissing him before resting her head on his chest. He ran his fingers through her hair and kissed the top of her head.
"I love you, Liv."
"I love you, too. Goodnight, El."
"Goodnight."
They closed their eyes and thought about how lucky they were to have had these moments together tonight. She was finally at peace. He was finally at peace. The spark that got put out ten years ago was finally reignited, and this time, it wasn't going out ever again.