She'd been on edge for some time. Raven knew it; the Titans knew it; and no matter how she tried, she couldn't get away from Tim's probing blue eyes that said she was not fooling him. Right now, she was standing over the faucet, washing dishes. And even though his eyes were on his laptop every time she looked at him, she could feel the third boy wonder's eyes on her back. The silence was becoming stifling. Raven had to do something. Mustering her courage, Raven turned to the boy wonder who was just setting his mug of coffee on the table. "When do you leave?" she asked. Tim's eyes flew up to hers. If he was shocked at her unexpected question, his face didn't show it. "That eager to get rid of me?" he joked with a raised brow. Raven hung her head, covering a blush. "Probably in the next hour," he said, shutting down his laptop.
Carrying his mug to the sink, Tim paused next to Raven who had returned to her dish-washing task. He studied her. She had yet to look him in the eye. Why?
Raven's heart raced in her chest as she felt Tim's body heat radiated from him. They stood nearly shoulder to shoulder, and Raven could feel his eyes on her. Blindly reaching for the mug that was in his hands, Raven nearly jumped when warm fingers intertwined with her own. She looked at their combined hands before staring up at Tim. How did he manage to take her breath away every time she looked at him? "Raven," Tim looked at her with concern, "what's going on? You've been distant and tense this entire week." Raven inhaled deeply but said nothing. "Is it me?" Tim asked with unease.
"No," Raven's eyes widened in horror.
"I know we've been-"
"Tim," she shook her head.
"Did I move too fast?"
"Tim," Raven gripped his forearm with her free hand as she said his name firmly. "It wasn't you." Raven saw his eyes soften in relief. "And, I had fun," she added with a blush. Tim lifted his hand to her face and began to sweetly caress her blush. "And when you get back, we should visit the zoo."
"The zoo?" his eyebrows lifted playfully. Raven shrugged as she looked away from him. "Or the aquarium," she said.
"Zoo and aquarium," Tim smiled. "Sounds fun." Raven smiled tentatively. Before she could return to her dishwashing, Tim added, "You know you can talk to me about anything."
"I know," Raven looked at him.
"And I do mean anything. Nothing you say can scare me off."
"You went toe-to-toe with my father," Raven smirked. "Anyone who can do that doesn't scare easily."
Tim nodded before saying, "I know intimacy is hard, but if I'm ever-"
"Tim," Raven interrupted once more. "It's fine. I'm just…in a slump."
"A slump?"
"A slump," she sighed taking the mug from his hand. "By the time you get back, I'll be fine." Tim continued to study her. "Tim, go," Raven placed her hands on his firm torso and gave him a gentle nudge.
"Okay," he relented, laughing at her efforts to literally push him out the door. Cupping her face in his hands, Tim softly placed his lips over Raven's chakra stone. Raven inhaled sharply, gripping his arms as he did so. Removing his lips, Tim looked into the empath's eyes lovingly. His eyes quickly glanced to her lips. Just as their lips brushed against each other, the door to the common room slid open, and the two jumped apart. Raven returned to the kitchen sink. "Yo, Tim," Bart strolled in with Garfield, both boys carrying bags and bags of junk food.
"Video game marathon?" Tim guessed.
"You'll be missing out," Garfield walked past Tim, going to the living room.
"I thought you'd be gone already," Bart said, as he placed his bags on a counter.
"I'm about to head out. Just wanted to say goodbye," Tim watched as his young friend pulled bags after bags of candy and soda from the grocery bag.
"Oh," Bart said. He then finally noticed the silent Titan in the kitchen. "Ohh," Bart smiled knowingly. Tim rolled his eyes as Bart gave him a wink. "Shut up," Tim said. Bart snickered. "Later, Garfield. Bart," Tim looked briefly at the back of the empath. Facing Bart again, Tim resisted the urge to slap the young speedster as Bart continued waggling his eyebrows. Tim punched him in the shoulder before leaving the room, ignoring Bart's howl of pain.
(TWO DAYS LATER)
Raven slowly exited the tower, not bothering to say goodbye to any of her friends or teammates. With a sigh, Raven began her long trek to a small flower stand nearby. The sun was shining; it was a beautiful day out, but Raven could only stare blankly and morosely at the flowers in front of her. "Ooh, Daddy," a little girl beside Raven said, "what about these? They're pink and so pretty. Ooh. Yellow." The little girl continued pointing out the different colored flowers.
"I think Mommy will like whatever you pick out, sweetie," the father replied. Raven did a quick scan of her environment. Seems like she wasn't the only one doing last-minute Mother's Day shopping. Quickly purchasing a bouquet of calla lilies, Raven found a dark alley. Creating a portal, she reemerged in Gotham. Even the usually bleak city seemed alive. Raven's senses were firing as she sensed the emotions of everyone within a mile radius. She momentarily lost her balance as she forgot to ready herself for the emotional loudness of the city.
A buzzing sound from the pockets of her jean shorts captured her attention as she tried to center herself. Pulling her cell from her pocket, Raven felt her face heat up as the face of Tim popped up. Her heart raced and Raven smiled as she thought about the last two dates she and Tim had gone on. Pocketing her phone, she began to walk to her destination while contemplating life. Raven liked Tim. Tim liked her. He wanted to be with her. Would it be so bad if she let him in – allowed him to be part of this part of her life? Raven shook her head. Her phone buzzed again. Looking down, she saw it was Tim…again. Raven sighed, turning her phone off. She'd deal with it later.
Tim frowned at his phone. She didn't call him on Saturday, she hadn't responded to any of his texts leaving him on Read. And now she was dodging her calls. She had pressed Ignore. Twice. "Something wrong, Master Tim?" Alfred asked the young man sitting at the kitchen table.
"I don't know," Tim answered slowly.
"This wouldn't have anything to do with a certain, female Titan, would it?" Alfred smirked as he began boiling water for tea. Tim only huffed. "I thought we were connecting," Tim eventually said. "We went out a couple of times…we even shared a few kisses," Tim smiled to himself as he remembered. His face fell as he continued, "I thought we were going somewhere, but…she's been distant this week. Really distant," Tim stressed. "She only speaks to me when coerced. She doesn't even look at me."
"Hmm," Alfred thought, "where have you taken this, amor of yours?" Tim rolled his eyes at Alfred's terminology. Amor? "We've gone to a museum," Tim answered. "A restaurant."
"A high-end restaurant?" Alfred asked.
Tim nodded. "We took a walk in the park; we returned to the Tower and stargazed." A distant look appeared in Tim's eyes as he remembered. "I had a good time, and I thought she did, too," he sighed, "I just wish she'd talk to me, let me in. I don't want to hurt her." Tim looked down at his phone, redialing. This time, it went straight to voicemail. Tim swore. "No answer?" Alfred guessed.
"Her phone is off. Maybe, I can contact someone else." Tim dialed another number. "Hey, Cassie….No, I'm good….Is Raven there?...Oh….Okay….Thanks. Have a good day." Tim dropped his head on the table as he released a loud groan. "I take it you were not successful," Alfred droned.
"No one has seen her," Tim mumbled into the table.
"Oh, dear," Alfred smirked, "if only there was a machine or piece of technology that could track a meager cellphone."
"I'm not going to track her phone, Alfred," Tim gave the butler a hard look. "That's creepy and weird." Alfred merely raised a brow. "It is creepy, right?" Tim asked Alfred wanting reassurance.
"Is it?" Alfred shrugged.
"You really are no help," Tim said.
"It's a sad day when a member of the Wayne family requires the help of an elderly butler to capture the heart of a girl he loves."
"I don't love her," Tim shot back.
"Whatever you say, Master Tim," Alfred said, strolling out the kitchen with a cup of tea. Tim stared blankly at the elderly butler's retreating back. Tracking Raven's phone would make him a stalker. Or would it?
Raven opened the rickety back gate and walked to the farthest, darkest corner of the cemetery. The trees in the cemetery blocked out the sun, giving the whole area a haunted and morbid look. Raven walked quietly to the back corner of the cemetery where a lone gravestone stood. She stopped in front of it. It was chipped and broken down. The flowers had wilted away. The grass around it was brown and dead, unlike the lush greenness surrounding it. All-in-all, this tombstone looked very much forgotten and lonely. The epitaph had faded. Only two words were legible. Angela Roth. Raven gave a small, brief smile as melancholy began rising in her chest. "Hi, Mom," Raven spoke softly, afraid of who may or may not be listening. The saying was, "Dead men tell no tales." But Raven wasn't buying it. She'd seen too many supernatural things in her lifetime to believe dead was dead. Really, though, there was nothing to be afraid of. It's not like an actual body was in there. "Sorry for not visiting sooner," Raven looked at the dead foliage around her, "I promise to do better. I brought purple calla lilies. I remember how much you liked them." Raven slowly bent down, placing the bouquet on the ground. "I also found a lamb," Raven held up a stuffed animal. "I wasn't even looking for it. It just caught my eye. It reminded me of the one Azar made..." Using her powers, Raven cast a spell to make sure the flowers and lamb stayed where they were. She didn't want anybody stealing them. "Not much has happened since Christmas," Raven continued as she stood to her feet. A soft wind blew through the air, and Raven's long strands gently swayed in the wind. "Well, that's not completely true. I went out with Tim. He's the guy I've been telling you about. He…he doesn't know I do this. I've been thinking, maybe I should tell him or – or invite him to come with me sometimes. I've already trusted him with so much, it just makes sense to – I know I'm overthinking this, but…" Raven's voice trailed off as she looked away from the stone. She hugged herself as silent tears rolled down her cheeks. "I know you and I weren't sentimental. We barely had enough time to get to know each other. But I just want to say, I love you. And…and…I'll do a better job taking care of your plot. Also, Happy Mother's Day." Raven wiped the tears from her face as she backed away. Turning around, she nearly teleported out of her skin. She wasn't alone. Placing a hand over her racing heart she said, "Tim?" How had he found her?
Finding the last place Raven's phone pinged wasn't too hard. But to say Tim was surprised would be an understatement. At first, he thought Bruce's state-of-the-art computer was on the fritz. Because…what reason could Raven possibly have to be in Gotham? Not that she wasn't allowed to go anywhere whenever she wanted to. Still…Tim searched the surrounding area where Raven's phone was last on. His eyes widened when he realized where she was. Besides a few liquor stores, tattoo parlors, and other miscellaneous small businesses – the only notable place was Gotham Cemetery. He would have slapped himself. At first, he shook his head in denial. He then immediately remembered Raven's mother was from Gotham.
Exiting the Batcave, Tim thought of all the things he would say to her. Why didn't she tell him? Why did she keep this a secret? How long had she been going there? Honestly, the fact that she kept this to herself did annoy him a little. Gripping the wheel tighter, Tim forced himself to relax. If he confronted Raven with his emotions roaring, she would shut down and reinforce the walls she put around herself.
Pulling into the cemetery and parking, Tim exited his car. Now, if memory served him right, Gotham Cemetery separated their sections by net-worth. Tim rolled his eyes as he began to walk. He couldn't believe how petty and materialistic people could be. What did it matter if a dead millionaire was buried next to a blue-collar worker? They were both dead. Shaking hair from his eyes, Tim continued walking. He needed to plan what to say to Raven. He didn't want to be annoyed with her, but he was slightly perturbed. Why would she hide this part of herself from him? He thought he was finally getting through to her. Why couldn't she realize – his train of thought came to an abrupt halt as he watched Raven place a stuffed animal against the tombstone. Tim stopped a good 20 feet away. He didn't want to eavesdrop but judging from the slight hunch of her shoulders and the way she held herself, Raven was in distress. And although Tim didn't need to be a rocket scientist to know whose tomb this was, curiosity still got the best of him. Taking a few quiet steps forward, the name became clear as day. Angela Roth. Suddenly, the annoyance and feelings of being slighted left him. How could he ever be mad at her? It's not like he'd taken her to his parents' gravesides either.
"Happy Mother's Day," Tim heard her say. Crap, he thought, he was too close. Before he could move, Raven turned around and stopped abruptly. Her cheeks turned pink as her eyes widened. "Tim?" she said in a shaky voice.
Raven's heart was pounding. What was he doing here? "Tim," she said breathlessly, "what are you doing here?"
"Looking for you," Tim answered, taking a small step towards her. He was approaching her as if she were a scared, wild animal about to run. Maybe she was. "Looking for me?" Raven repeated. "In a cemetery?"
"No. I tracked your phone."
"Tracked my phone? How? I turned it off before I got here."
"No, you turned it off before entering the cemetery," Tim said. Raven formed a small 'oh' with her mouth. "Wait," she said, "you were tracking me! Do you always do that?"
"No," Tim quickly put his hands up, "this is my first time. I swear."
"Why?"
"You hung up on me. Twice."
"I wanted to be alone."
"Usually, you tell me or a teammate that you want to be alone," Tim stepped towards her. "Raven, Cassie had no idea where you went. You didn't respond to my texts." Tim pulled his hands through his hair in frustration. Raven frowned as her face morphed into one that was contrite. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I just…I…"
"This day is hard for you, isn't it?" Tim asked compassionately. Raven bit her lower lip and nodded silently. "How often do you come here?" Tim asked.
"Not often enough," Raven said. "There's no one to take care of her – I mean 'it'. There's no one to take care of it – the tombstone. Caretakers only cut the grass, but nothing grows in this area. The tree branches cover whatever sunlight would seep in."
"So, you leave flowers and stuffed animals," Tim said tenderly. Raven nodded, glancing at Tim before looking away. "I just want her to not feel alone," Raven whispered as silent tears rolled down her cheeks. "Ugh, I'm sorry," she said as she angrily wiped them away.
"No, don't be," Tim said, now standing an inch or two away from her. "You have nothing to apologize for."
"You're probably wondering why I didn't tell you," Raven said. Tim smiled at her before reaching for her hand. "Come with me," he cocked his head in the direction he wanted to go. Raven nodded, slipping her hand into Tim's. Intertwining their fingers, Tim led them to the other side of the cemetery. It was a good 20-minute walk spent in silence. A silence broken by Raven's gasp. This side of the cemetery looked more like a museum or mausoleum or something. Every tombstone was made of marble or some sort of precious metal. Each was very clean and very shiny. The sadness one felt when entering a cemetery was not felt here. "We're still in a cemetery?" Raven questioned.
"For Gotham's elite," Tim smirked back at her. Raven nodded silently. They eventually came to a halt before two memorials that looked meager compared to the surrounding statuesque stones. Raven's eyes widened as she read the names. Jack Drake. Janet Drake. "Tim," Raven spoke.
"How could I possibly justify being upset with you when I haven't even introduced you to my parents?" he asked with a small, happy yet mournful smile.
"I didn't realize how close…"
"Neither did I," Tim admitted. "Even in death, we Gotham elites can't mingle with the commoners." Raven rolled her eyes. "I come here to talk, too," Tim glanced at Raven. "If I'd known your mother was buried in the same cemetery, I would have given you a ride anytime."
"I didn't think your parents were buried here," Raven said. "I thought, maybe there was a piece of land owned by the Drake family and that's where your parents were buried. Like Bruce Wayne."
"Okay, Wayne Manor has its own zip code. Bruce's land is big enough to house this cemetery." The two birds stood in silence. "Is today hard for you, too?" Raven looked up at him.
"Not really," Tim answered. "Not anymore. It helps that I have an eidetic memory. Also, most of my memories are good…happy. My childhood was not a horror story…until my parents were murdered. But before then, all good times." Raven smiled. She loved it when Tim was happy. His happy aura would warm her from the inside out. "And I have so many photos," Tim said. "So many memories. I miss them, and I always will. But it doesn't hurt so much anymore." Raven nodded. Once again, the two birds let silence overtake them. "There isn't a body," Raven whispered.
"Hmm?" Tim questioned.
"My mother's grave. There isn't a body. The casket is empty. There was nothing left to bury when Azarath was destroyed," Raven said. Tim wanted to pull Raven into his chest and hug her and protect her from the rest of the world. "What about her parents?" he asked. Raven shook her head. "She was in foster care when everything happened," Raven answered as tears came to her eyes.
"But how did-"
"I did," Raven interrupted him. "A couple of years ago…after Trigon. I bought a plot and everything."
"Raven," Tim said as his heart broke in two.
"I thought it would be nice. She would like it. She deserved to be remembered, too," Raven said as tears began to freely flow down her face. "They all do," she added as she thought of the Azarathians. Raven hiccupped as she tried to swallow her tears. But Tim began rubbing her back in soft circles. "It's okay to cry, Raven," he whispered. "I won't tease or mock you. You're safe with me. I may even cry with you." Raven looked up at Tim, her lower lip trembling. Taking him up on his offer, Raven buried her head into his chest and let out all her pain.
Tim reacted to this by kissing the top of her head, rubbing small and gentle circles into her back, and whispering sweet nothings into her hair.
As for Raven, she was completely embarrassed by her emotional display. However, she couldn't find the will or strength to stop. It was like her emotions had completely taken over and she had no control of her tear ducts or tear glands or whatever part of the body controlled her tears. And there were so many tears; Tim's shirt was soaked. But she couldn't stop. Every time she tried to hold a sob in, she would hiccup. And hiccupping to hold back tears, in her opinion, was so much more embarrassing. So, she cried into his shirt to her heart's content.
Twenty minutes later, Raven's cries began to lessen as they became nothing more than small sobs here and there. She eventually pulled away from Tim. "Your shirt is all wet," Raven sniffed.
"That's okay," Tim smiled as he wiped the few silent tears from her eyes with his thumbs. "I don't mind at all." Raven gave him a shaky smile. Her face fell. "I'm sorry," Raven said, "I'm not – I don't know how to – but I want to," she released a puff of air. "I'm not making sense," she laughed sardonically.
"I understand," Tim smiled down at her. He slowly lifted her head so he could see her big, beautiful, violet eyes. They were wide, round, and glossy with unshed tears. "It's scary, the unknown, letting people in," he continued in, wiping away a few escaped tears from her eyes. "I get it. It's hard. I can't promise to not hurt your feelings," his thumb caressed her lower lip, "but I promise it will never be on purpose or out of spite. I'm only asking for a chance." Raven nodded hesitantly while biting her lower lip. "Want to get out of here?" Tim asked.
"Okay," she smiled tentatively. Tim grabbed her hand, kissing her knuckles before intertwining their fingers.
The two began a slow trek back the way they came. They were both lost in thought when something caught her eye near her mother's grave. A ray of sunlight had broken through the multiple tree branches and was shining on her mother's tombstone. The grass was no longer dead, and flowers seemed to be sprouting. Raven smiled and moved closer to Tim. Somehow, she knew things were going to be okay.
(5 years later)
Tim covered the waffles in whipped cream, the way he knew she would like it. "Okay," he said to the other occupant in the room. "What do you think? Should I put it on top of the whipped cream and hope it doesn't sink to the body? We don't want her to choke, do we?" A cacophony of noises consisting of gurgles and babbles was the answer Tim received. "I want it to be special," Tim explained. A squeal and giggle were all Tim got. "You're right," Tim relented. "I'll ask her tonight, after you've gone to bed." A high-pitched squeal was all Tim received. "Fine," Tim rolled his eyes, "we'll ask her together. Come on," he smiled as he lifted his daughter out of her highchair.
Once Tim was positive the 7-month-old was secure in his arms, he picked up the giant plate of Belgian waffles – Raven's favorite. "Let's go see if mommy is awake," he huffed. "Ooh, you're getting heavy." A suspicious belch came from his daughter. Tim sighed. He was going to have to change his shirt…again.
Once he reached their bedroom, Tim placed the plate on the nightstand before placing Allera in the center of the bed. Scooching her to the head of the bed, he placed a bunch of pillows behind her to help her sit up. She was now between Tim and her mother who had yet to wake. The past several weeks, Raven had been sleeping more and more, longer and deeper. Tim couldn't help but wonder if maybe they had a second child on the way. Though, he couldn't think of a time when they weren't careful.
Allera began babbling again as she put her entire fist in her mouth. "You know, you probably won't be able to do that when you get older," Tim smiled, removing her hand from her mouth. Allera released a loud squeal, waking her sound-asleep mother. "Mmm," Raven moaned as she turned to face her two bedmates. Tim was once again struck by her beauty as her eyes began to open. Bedhead made his soon-to-be (hopefully) fiancée even more desirable. If Allera hadn't been there, Tim might of – Ohh! Realization hit him hard. He remembered one morning when Raven said she had missed one day of birth control. But Tim, a creature of habit, loved making love to her every other morning. He merely shrugged and said he'd pull out. He did, it was just too late by the time he did.
"Hey," Raven smiled sleepily at him. "Hi, Baby," Raven said in her high-pitched, baby voice. "You're up early." Raven sat up and lifted her daughter into her arms. Allera squealed with glee as Raven did so. "She's been fed and changed," Tim smiled. Raven smiled back at him. "I can see that," Raven chuckled as motioned to the vomit on Tim's short.
"Anyway," Tim continued, "Allera and I decided to make your favorite. Belgian waffles." He proudly set the plate of waffles on Raven's lap. Allera immediately tried to grab them. "Tim," Raven laughed.
"Thought this would be a great start to Mother's Day," Tim beamed.
"Thank you," Raven smiled, "and this is…" her voice trailed off as her face grew pensive. "Uh…Tim?" Raven said as she lifted something from the whipped cream. Crap, Tim thought to himself. He forgot to remove the ring. "Tim?" Raven searched his face inquisitively.
"This wasn't how I wanted to ask," Tim said, "I mean, it was originally, but then Allera and I decided maybe it was too cliché and I forgot to take it back out of the whipped cream." Great, he was babbling. Raven continued watching him. Their daughter was quiet, resting her head on Raven's shoulders.
"Raven," Tim sat up on his knees deciding to do this before he lost his nerve. Clearing his throat, he began, "I don't know how to ask this; I don't have a speech prepared. So, I guess, I'll get straight to the point. Will you marry-"
"Yes," Raven answered, not giving him the chance to finish.
"Oh," Tim's eyebrows flew to his hairline. Raven smiled as tears welled up in her eyes. "I – 'll marry you, Tim," she said. A big smile grew on Tim's face. He gently took the ring from her and said, "Let me go clean this off."
Raven watched her boyfrie – fiancée, walk to the bathroom. An overwhelming sense of happiness and joy filled her chest. She thought she would burst. She looked down at her Allera who was staring up at Raven with her bluish-purple eyes. "Did you know about this?" Raven whispered before giving her daughter an Eskimo kiss. Allera babbled in delight. Raven smiled. "I guess mommy's surprise is going to have to wait," Raven placed a hand on her stomach. "I don't want my surprise to overshadow daddy's."
"All clean and shiny," Tim strolled back into their bedroom, a bouquet of violets in his hand.
"Where were you hiding those?" Raven's eyes lit up.
"I still have a few hiding spots you've yet to find," he replied. Taking her left hand, Tim slid the clean diamond ring on Raven's ring finger. The ring itself was simple and plain, the diamond being the only decorative feature. Instead of releasing her hand, though, Tim began to lay soft kisses on her fingers. Raven's cheeks warmed. "I am the luckiest man alive," Tim said.
"I don't know," Raven replied breathlessly, "I think I may be the luckiest person alive." She looked down at the infant who was beginning to fall asleep. "I never thought that I…I never expected…" Tim leaned over and silenced her with a kiss. "I love you, Raven," his blue eyes looked deep into her violet ones.
"I love you, too, Tim," she spoke softly. Tim leaned in again, kissing Raven even more passionately while also reminding himself they had a child in bed with them. Pulling away, Tim smiled at the blush on her cheeks and Raven's now swollen lips. "Happy Mother's Day," he whispered.
"Thank you," Raven responded shyly. Tim smirked. "Alright," he said breaking the spell, "you should try the waffles. I tried a new recipe."
"Really?" Raven's eyes widened as she looked down at the plate. Tim took the plate and began feeding her while describing in great detail the ingredients in this new recipe. Raven listened with rapt attention, loving the way Tim's eyes sparkled when he was exciting.
And after breakfast they would introduce Allera to the grandparents she would never know, before heading to Wayne Manor. Bruce always shrugged when strangers or league members asked after Allera, an air of nonchalance around the stoic billionaire vigilante. However, he usually took Allera from Raven as soon as they entered the manor. He would then spend the entire visit holding his granddaughter.
The first time Allera cried in his arms, Raven was ready for him to hand Allera back to her. Bruce surprised everyone when he stood up and began walking with her while rocking her in his arms, coaxing her back to sleep. He didn't think twice about changing her, and he always wanted to be the one to feed her. The whole thing was very odd to Raven. Then again, Raven wasn't used to having a father-type person in her life.
Returning to the present as Tim plopped a dollop of whipped cream on her nose, Raven used her powers to dump the syrup from her plate on his head. Tim laughed before bewailing his hair that would probably be sticky for the next several days. "If I get swarmed by bees, it's on you," he laughed. Raven smiled back at him before saying, "You'll be alright." And he would. They all would.