It was a normal day in Aincrad. Grass was green, sky was beautiful, still couldn't log out. Today was a particularly good day, so Kirito decided to get out and grind for XP against some high level monsters. He was walking across the green plains, but something interesting caught his eye. Sure, it was around level 80, but it looked fairly harmless. It was small, puffy….and pink? "Is this a joke?," Kirito said to himself. He checked the thing's stats. All of its stats had three question marks beside them in place of numbers and it's name was Kirby. "Kirby? Was this thing designed by a child? If so, I can kill it easily, I am Jesus-kun after all". He slowly crept up to Kirby with a crouching stance with one of his swords out. He was about to bring the sword down on the pink puffball until it turned around and said "Poyo!". Kirito admitted it was cute but he had to kill it. He sent it flying across the field and Kirby cried "WAHHHHHHHHHHHH" as he flew over the world of Aincrad. "Well, that takes cares of that problem," Kirito said as he walked away, dusting his hands off despite not using them once that whole encounter. Not long after he started walking away, Kirby came crashing down on his Warp Star. The impact of the star crashing down nearly killed Kirito due to it being extremely close to him. "WHAT THE HELL" he screamed as Kirby just shook it off and rolled out of the crater. "Alright, guess I'm gonna have to fight for real". He unsheathed both his swords and took a fighting stance. Kirby looked confused and said "Poyo?". Kirito then ran up to Kirby and berated him with sword strikes and slashes. The pink thing couldn't take it and rolled down a hill after the attack, although he got up not long after. Kirito figured since that looked effective, he could just keep doing that and kill the thing. Once he brought his sword down, however, the pink gumball looking creature caught it between the two nubs he calls hands. He pulled the sword from between Kirby's hands and jumped back. He questioned himself; "How? He couldn't defend himself at all just a minute ago." He had no time to really think about this though as Kirby was charging up as Kirby was charging up his fist. Kirito didn't grasp what he was doing. Kirby then charged forward with a blue flaming fist, screaming "HYAHHH" as his little nub plunged itself further and further into Kirito's stomach. Kirito coughed up blood, and was sent flying back, crashing through buildings. The damage wasn't fatal, but he determined that the punch had broken his ribs. That was when he finally figured it out. "The question marks besides his stats….they're there because Kirby has no real ceiling of power. He keeps getting stronger and stronger and getting new powers. In other words, he has infinite power, and the stats have question marks beside them because even HE doesn't know what they are, because he's a baby. That's why he's able to catch on so quick." Kirito was many things: shocked, curious, amazed, but most of all scared. "That….. thing is the most powerful being in the universe. It has the power to kill everyone I love. Asuna, Silica, Yui, Klein, my sister cousin whatever that wants to suck my cock, that random black nigga who shows up once per season who has no personality. They'll all die. I'm scared….but I'm even more scared of losing my loved ones, which is why I have to fight." He stood up and grabbed his swords and ran out the building back on the plains, "LISTEN UP PUFFBALL! YOU DIE TODAY!", Kirito screamed but Kirby didn't care. He was too busy eating an apple. He went up and slapped it out of his hands, watching it fade away when it hit the grass. "Listen to me." Kirito said but Kirby just looked down at the ground with a sad face. "Glad I got your attention. Now fight me!" Kirito was pumped up now, he was ready to fight. A song started playing in game (Kirito did not know this was Crossing Field) and it got him more hyped. He ran up screaming HAAAHHH and shoved the sword in Kirby's face, but the sword was now gone. "Huh," Kirito questioned. Just then, the song stopped, and Kirby began to inhale Kirito's skinny ass like a back alley hooker sucking cock. "I DON'T WANNA DIE," Kirito said as he was being sucked into Kirby's infinite void of a stomach. Kirby burped and said "Poyo" as a head full of black hair popped up on his head and two swords on his back. An orange haired girl walked up to Kirby. It was Asuna. She looked like she maxed out her cooking stat. "You,…you killed my boyfriend. You'll pay". The two of them jumped at each other, prepared to clash.
The end.