Honest Trailer: MML
From the same two old men who brought you an endless summer years before the actual climate crisis, comes a show about destruction, chaos and serious bad luck, but also teaches lessons about how you can rise from the ashes. There's a kid named Milo in there, too. He just sort of shows up. Milo Murphy's Law.
Meet Milo Murphy, the world's most unlucky, accident-prone, yet adaptable cinnamon roll, who is always prepared to deal with the cyclone of calamity that follows him everywhere he goes with the backpack he stole from Lara Croft that houses things a normal backpack never could, like a miniature medieval catapult, a fully functional gas-powered generator, various giant inflatables and an actual anchor. Either he's trying out for World's Strongest teenager or he has technology nicked straight from Doctor Who.
But having a TARDIS backpack isn't his only admirable trait. He has single-handedly done what Cody from Suite Life tried to do in two whole shows and never once pulled off, making sweater-vests a viable fashion choice. He is voiced by someone who literally calls themselves Weird Al, regularly wears clothes associated with nerd culture and yet gets the attention of every female main character in a 5-foot radius whose name isn't Melissa because just look at him. Look at that cute face and then tell me you would not want to wake up next to that in the morning.
Alongside Milo are his two closest friends, Zack Underwood, a former boy band member who is here because we have to shoehorn the music into a Dwampy show somehow, and Melissa Chase, the tomboy who's out to break every girl character trope in the book, starting by not having a crush on the male lead, but it won't stop fans from shipping them anyway. Seriously, after the S2 finale, this should've sunk by now.
They'll be joined by an array of colourful side characters, like Amanda, the OCD stereotype who goes from merely tolerating Milo to wanting his pistachios in the space of a few episodes, Bradley, the self-centered jerk Phineas Flynn almost was, Doofenshmirtz, because we have to link this to the previous show somehow and Cavendish and Dakota, the time-travelling not-gay couple who end up exactly where the action is because the plot demands it. Together, they'll face off against formidable foes like time travelling nut monsters, octopus aliens ripped straight out of a Japanese hentai production, corporate greed and whatever Murphy's Law throws at them. It's a wonder Milo hasn't died violently yet.
But nothing compares to the looming threat that shadows over them, cancellation. Follow the social media pages that are filled with fan comments scared that there will never be a Season 3 and lament at the fact that Disney has made no effort to make any merch out of this beloved show whatsoever. I would fight anyone on the side of the street for a Diogee plushie. That dog may be the only thing cuter than Milo in the entire show, damnit! If this turns out like Wander over Yonder, I seriously predict a riot!
Starring:
Calamity Man (Milo)
Female Sheldon Cooper (Amanda)
Zayn from One Direction (Zack)
Hermione Granger (Melissa)
Dr. Wily (Doofenshmirtz)
Bert and Ernie (Cavendish and Dakota)
and Spy Pet (Perry the Platypus)
Phineas and Ferb: the spin-off
Wait, the crossing guard voiced by Christian Slater is named Elliot? Uh oh, here come the Alone in the Dark flashbacks again. Call my therapist.