A Cat in No-Wonderland
By Kurna
Disclaimer:
I do not own Wonder Woman or Catwoman, or any characters or storylines related to them. They belong to DC Comics, Warner Brothers Media and/or related companies. I will not make any money with this story and no copyright infringement is intended.
I also do not own Xena: the Warrior Princess, or any of its characters or storylines. It belongs to Renaissance Pictures, Studio USA, Universal Studios and/or related companies. I will not make any money with this story and no copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note:
This story is a crossover between the worlds of Wonder Woman and Xena: Warrior Princess. The Wonder Woman/Diana Prince here is mostly based on the DCEU movies, especially Patty Jenkins' Wonder Woman, since I do not know enough about the comics. My Catwoman is probably a mixture of different versions of Catwoman from movies, TV series and other sources. The idea of Xena and Gabrielle still living in current times is inspired by stories of the "Blood & Roses" universe, as well as the stories by D, but without using their stories directly (I could not do them justice anyway).
This story is a continuation of my older stories "A Meeting of Chance (or is it?)" and "We Need to Talk". It is probably easier to understand the setup if you read them first, especially the former. (See end of story for further notes.)
Prologue
A little café in Paris
Diana sat at one of the small outside tables, enjoying her coffee and the sun. She was in a good mood. The weather was nice, the crime rate had been low these last couple of days and she was texting her new girlfriend. She had just invited Selina to visit her during the weekend. Her mood got even better when she got a positive response. Deciding it was time to get back to work, she left some money on the table and stood up to leave. Full of happy thoughts about the coming weekend, she did not notice a woman passing the table she had just left and swiping up her discarded cup.
Hidden basement below a Parisian mansion
The mysterious woman from the café finished an incantation, aimed at the cup she had stolen before and which now stood in the center of a pentagram. The same cup which had been touched by Wonder Woman. Having completed her spell, the sorceress looked at the cup.
"So, let's see where this pesky do-gooder has been for the last couple of months."
The powerful ritual allowed her to trace the steps of a person who had touched the spell focus back through time.
"Okay, that's the museum and that must be her apartment. Hm, the last two month she was in the States, Gotham mostly. I'll have to check that out. And before that … what's that? She comes home from the airport, but where was she? There is a gap in her time line! There she was driving to the airport, then moving in south eastern direction, probably on a plane, but then there is a gap before she reappears several days later at the airport. But the spell worked! It should have traced her everywhere on the planet."
The woman suddenly stopped.
"That's it! She was not on the planet. And since I would have found some kind of upwards motion, if she had simply moved into space, let's say for example with the help of Superman, she must have been in some kind of parallel universe. Now that is interesting. I might get rid of her, if I manage to push her back into that other world. She must have had some kind of device to make the jump, but it won't be something she carries around all the time. If I manage to surprise her, she will be trapped in there forever."
The woman cackled evilly.
"That's so brilliant. With the signature I got from the ritual, I can create a potion that opens a one-way portal to whatever dimension she was. And my friend here will make sure that she gets pushed through."
The woman turned to a cage holding a hideous, winged creature.
"Yes, my friend. I have a job for you. And as a reward you will journey to a new world, where you can roam freely. So, let's get to work. I think I can have it ready at the end of the week."
An Unexpected Journey
Paris
Selina checked the number. Yes, this was the address. Earlier, Diana had sent her a message, telling her she would be late.
"Hi Selina. Sorry, I'm running late. The concierge will let you into the building and I'm sure you know how to let yourself into the apartment even without a key. ."
Selina smiled and went inside. It was a joke, but also a nice sign of trust. Selina was looking forward to meeting the amazon. It was the first time Diana had invited her to her home, something she appreciated. Over the last couple of weeks, both women had become closer, meeting several times during Wonder Woman's stay in Gotham. The locks at the apartment door were state of the art, but no match for Catwoman. She left her bag at the door and then went further to explore the apartment. A door to her left led to a tastefully furnished living room with floor to ceiling windows. She stepped towards them to enjoy the view, when suddenly a dark form crashed through the glass and attacked her. Even with her supernatural reflexes she could not completely avoid being hit. The vaguely humanoid form touched her and suddenly the world seemed to implode around them.
One moment she was fighting this thing – did it have wings? – the next she found herself lying on the floor. Her attacker was gone and oddly enough, the window was no longer broken. Selina got up. What had just happened? Was it a dream? Or maybe a vision? But wait, had the room really looked like this when she entered it moments ago? On a shelf she saw a picture of Diana and another woman, smiling into the camera, that she was certain had not been there before. Puzzled she stepped back into the hall. Her bag was gone from where he had dropped it. Hearing a noise, she turned around and saw somebody emerging from another room.
"Diana!"
The other woman looked surprised.
"Do I know you?"
Selina's response died on her lips, when a second woman emerged. It was the redheaded woman from the picture. But what really gave Catwoman pause was the disheveled look of her hair and clothes. Actually, now she noticed that Diana had the same look, as if both of them had just been making out, if not worse. Anger filled her and she instinctively moved into a fighting stance.
"What kind of joke is this? Why did you invite me, when she is here as well? Did you actually plan on a threesome? You said you have a different ethic than man's world, but I did not expect this."
At Catwoman's harsh words, the redhead immediately stepped between her and Diana, shielding the latter.
"Who are you? What do you want? Diana, did you really invite this woman?"
The last question was aimed at the woman at her side.
"No, Elaine. I have never seen this woman." She turned to Selina. "Did you pick the wrong door? Wait, how did you even enter this apartment? The door was locked!"
"You should know that never stopped me. I mean, you even dared me."
Selina answered with a cocky smirk, though it was quickly replaced with uncertainty.
"Though something does not add up. How did you steal my bag? I should have heard you. And I could swear this hall and the living room look slightly different then when I entered. It all started with that vision of being attacked."
Diana looked confused, but the redhead at her side – Elaine, it seemed – shot a calculating look in Selina's direction.
"Do you remember anything more about that vision?"
"Some kind of beast crashed through the window and attacked. I could not move aside fast enough, but when it touched, there was some kind of explosion. I felt disoriented for a moment. When my mind cleared up, I was sitting on the floor and that thing was gone. There was no trace of it left. The window wasn't damaged either. I am not sure, if it really was a vision, but I surely wasn't out long enough to dream."
"Have you taken any drugs?"
"Not recently. And I wouldn't take anything strong enough to affect me like this anyway. However, maybe you are on to something. It could have been one of the other arch criminals. The Joker loves to work with hallucinogenic drugs. He even might have learned that I have been helping Wonder Woman lately."
Diana looked bewildered.
"Who is the Joker?"
"You know, the Joker, the Clown Prince of Crime. Arch nemesis of your friend Batman."
"Batman? Who is this Batman?"
Before Catwoman could answer, Elaine spoke up.
"I think I might know what happened. If I'm correct, you are not in Kansas anymore."
"What do you mean?"
"Your Diana, she is a crime fighter, isn't she? A hero?"
"What do you mean, 'my Diana'?" Selina stopped; then she looked closer at the owner of the apartment. "No, she is right. You are not my Diana. You look like her, but you do not have her power, her aura. So there are two of you, aren't there?"
Before a puzzled Diana could answer, her friend spoke again.
"Not just two Dianas, if I am correct. Two worlds."
"You mean -"
Before Selina could finish her sentence, she was interrupted by a loud bang and the sound of shattering glass. Seconds later a dark shape emerged from the living room. It was the same monster that had attacked Catwoman before. The thing looked like a mixture of a woman's head with a bird's body and wings. With a hiss, it stormed towards the women. While Catwoman got in a fighting stance, she could hear Diana's astonished shout.
"Is that a harpy?"
"Look's like it," came as reply from Elaine, before the redhead took up position at Selina's side.
Those were the last words for a while, because now the fight started. The beast fought ferociously, but the two women managed to keep it at bay. To Selina's welcome surprise the other woman was an excellent fighter. Her style was different from Selina's cat-like grace, showing the precise moves of an expert martial artist. Catwoman could not pin down the exact technique, but it was very effective. Elaine was also a good team player, managing to synchronize her attacks with Selina's effortlessly.
For several minutes they traded blows with the creature. Slowly Catwoman realized they had a problem, despite seeming to be the better fighters. No matter how hard they hit the beast, no matter how often it went down, it showed no sign of slowing down. Again and again it attacked them. They tried to overpower it, but the Harpy was too strong. They still had not found a solution, when one of the beast's strikes finally hit Elaine and send her flying into the wall. The redhead was dazed for a moment. Diana came forward and took her position to help Selina, but she did not have her girlfriend's experience. For a minute, she managed to keep her defenses up, but then she was knocked halfway through the hall. Elaine had used the short break to make a call, before she jumped back into the fray. While again exchanging blows with the beast, she turned to Selina.
"We have to retreat. We are unable to hurt this thing and my priority is protecting Diana."
Catwoman had to agree. Although she was faring slightly better, all three of them were breathing heavily by now and the other two women were bleeding where the Harpy's claws had caught them. She cursed silently, because her costume was in the missing bag. With her steel-enforced claws she might have had a chance to make damage against this thing.
"You are right. Any ideas?"
"We've got friends of mine waiting downstairs with a car."
"Okay, on my sign, run. Both of you run as fast as you can. I will stall this beast. Then I will follow you."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am faster than you."
"Okay, be careful. It's a blue van."
Catwoman just nodded. With a quick fist and kick combination, she pulled the creature's focus on her, allowing the other two women to flee the apartment. For several minutes she played cat and mouth with the harpy, trying to give them enough time to reach the ground floor. A painful hit to her shoulder was a reminder that she could not keep this up forever against a foe that did not tire. She circled the beast and led it into the living room. She side stepped a hit to her head and used a quick elbow to send her opponent to the floor. Without delay she stepped through the broken window onto the balcony. There was another balcony about 6 feet away, same as in the stories below, both rows leading down to the second floor.
With an athletic twist, she jumped down one story to the balcony of the other row, easily holding onto its ledge. From there she jumped down another story, crossing back to the original row. From above she heard an angry hiss. With several more graceful jumps, she crisscrossed down until she reached the ground. Several bystanders looked at her with wide eyes, while she sprinted towards the waiting van. She jumped into the back, where she met Diana and a young brunette woman she had not seen before. Elaine's admiring voice had her turn to the front of the car.
"Wow that was awesome. You were down that building in like five seconds."
"Thanks. They call me Catwoman for a reason, I guess."
Elaine laughed.
"Well Catwoman, meet my friends Lara and Miko."
She pointed to the brunette and to the driver, a young Asian woman, but the latter suddenly cursed.
"Merde! Somebody jumped from the window. No, he did not jump, he is flying."
Elaine looked up and cursed as well.
"Get moving! It's the harpy."
The young driver needed not be told twice. She started the car and stepped down on the gas, accelerating quickly. Diana looked out of the window and shouted in alarm.
"It's following us!"
Elaine's face turned grim.
"Miko, get rid of it. Don't worry about the traffic rules. I'd rather pay the fee than having to fight that thing again."
Diana's worried voice had her turn back again.
"Elaine, what is happening here? Why is a harpy attacking us? And what did you mean before, when you talked about two Dianas and two worlds?"
The redhead sighed.
"It is a bit of a long story. I will explain, but please allow Lara to check your arm first. You are still bleeding."
Diana complied and let Lara clean the gash provisionally and cover it with a makeshift bandage. Afterwards the brunette looked at Selina, but she shook her head.
"Thanks, I'm good. A bit banged up, but no wounds."
During this exchange, Miko had checked the rear mirror regularly.
"The thing is still following us. We need a plan, soon."
"Okay, keep an eye on it. Lara, you too. I will quickly explain to Diana, what I think is happening."
Elaine turned towards the back again.
"Okay, this will sound weird, but you have to believe me. About a year ago, friends of mine from Greece met a woman who called herself Diana Prince and looked exactly like you. It turned out she was from a parallel world. She was the "you" from that world. She even had your job at the Louvre as well. My friends helped the other Diana back into her own world, but before she left she warned them. She said she had powerful enemies, enemies with supernatural powers. If those would learn about this world and about you, they would try to harm you. Therefore, my friend asked me to keep an eye on you and to protect you, if necessary. When Catwoman here appeared, I simply put one and one together."
Diana seemed to struggle to believe what she heard.
"Another world? Another me?"
Suddenly she looked at Elaine with a strange expression.
"You knew about me? Does that mean our whole relationship was just a trick to get near me?"
The redhead shook her head vehemently.
"Oh no, falling for you was not part of the plan. That was simply your natural charisma at work."
The statement caused a comment from Selina, who had listened silently for the last few minutes.
"That sentiment I can understand very well, though it is kind of disturbing, seeing you two together."
Elaine gave her a quick acknowledgement.
"I can understand how that must be odd."
Then she turned back to Diana.
"Please believe me. My feelings for you are real. I did not tell you before, because it seemed too outlandish to believe, but otherwise I was always honest."
Diana hesitated for a second.
"Okay, for the moment we are good. Later, you will have to tell me everything, but I accept it for now."
Elaine nodded. Her relieve was palpable.
"Thank you. I will –"
The redhead was interrupted by a loud banging noise.
Lara shouted in alarm.
"That thing is on the car."
A dent appeared in the roof, followed by another. Catwoman was the first to recover.
"This beast is incredibly strong. It is only a matter of time until it breaks through. We need an idea."
Elaine agreed.
"True. Miko, try to find a gate or a low bridge to drive through. Hopefully that way we can lose the harpy. I will make a call."
Miko nodded.
"Will do. Girls, help me looking."
The young driver let the van veer left and right, trying to make it more difficult for the harpy to hold on. While her eyes scanned the outside, Catwoman simultaneously listened to the creature on their roof. Two more dents had appeared. After a hushed conversation on her phone, Elaine looked up.
"Help is on the way, but we need to buy us some time. Anything yet?"
As if on cue, Catwoman pointed ahead.
"50 yards. Turn right into that gate."
Miko nodded.
"Okay, brace yourselves."
She slowed down only slightly and turned with squealing tires into the opening of a small alley. They had enough speed for the harpy to be wiped from the roof by the low hanging bar meant to keep trucks from using the alley as a shortcut. For a second it was surprisingly quiet without the creature banging on the roof. Selina checked how her comrades were faring in this situation. Lara and Diana were nervously checking the windows for any sign of their foe, while Miko concentrated on the road ahead. Elaine's eyes were on her phone. For a moment, she looked up and turned to the driver.
"At the end of the alley, turn right and then directly left."
Miko did not say anything, just followed the directions. They were just about to turn right, when Lara sounded an alarm.
"The thing is following us again."
Elaine nodded grimly.
"It was about to happen. Miko, half a block after we turn left, there is an underground garage to the right. If we are lucky, we might be able to enter it before the harpy notices it. And if not, there are low ceilings, meaning it can't use its wings as an extra advantage. We'll make our stand there."
The driver nodded her understanding. Once she had made the turn left, she pushed down on the gas pedal. It seemed only seconds later that she turned the van into the entryway of the garage. She stopped at the bar to get a ticket. She hated to waste precious seconds with waiting, but knew a broken barrier would have been a dead giveaway. Elaine meanwhile had sent a quick message, before looking at the others.
"Did it follow?"
Diana was the first to answer.
"Not immediately, but I think I saw it reach the crossing before we entered this building. It must have seen us as well."
"Oh well, it would have been too easy, I suppose."
She turned to the others.
"We make our stand down there. Remember, we cannot really hurt that creature. It's only about staying unharmed until the cavalry arrives. Therefore we have to fight defensively and we need to have each other's backs. If necessary, we retreat slowly, but we cannot run. This place is where the help will arrive."
When nobody else asked the obvious question, Selina spoke up.
"Not to be a downer here, but what makes you so sure our reinforcements will be able to harm this beast?"
"They will be armed and I trust them, when they say it will work."
"Who are they?"
"My martial arts teacher and her partner."
Selina nodded approvingly.
"Okay, I have seen you fighting, so I can easily believe that your teacher must be good. Let's just hope, that they also know how to handle this foe."
Then they heard a by now familiar hiss from the entry way and knew that there was no more time for talking. They took position in a half circle, with the van at their backs. Moments later, the harpy appeared around the corner, flying low. With another hiss, it picked up speed and came directly at them. For a fleeting second, Selina wondered how much she had changed lately. Where the old Catwoman's first instinct would have been to save herself, she was now ready to fight alongside these strangers. And fight they did. For a while, it looked good. They had two more fighters and enough space to jointly attack the harpy.
However over time it became apparent that they still had the same problem. They could not hurt their enemy and the creature was too strong to be subdued. Lara had found the tire iron as a weapon, but it did not change the situation. Things went downhill, when the harpy managed to sink her claws deeply into Miko's thigh. The Asian went down with a cry, no longer able to put weight on her left leg. Luckily Elaine and Catwoman were able to intervene before the creature could follow through with another blow, allowing Diana to pull Miko behind the car. The rescue effort however had cost Elaine dearly, for it brought her in the path of the harpy's next strike. She managed to block it with her left arm, but then pain raced through her body and she felt a bone break under the blow.
Catwoman fought ferociously, but even she was by now bleeding from several wounds. Lara, who was now fighting at her side, suddenly cried out in pain. The beast had managed to disarm her with a powerful swipe of her claws, sending the tire iron flying away. The creature closed in on the brunette, to finish her off as well. Catwoman prepared to distract the beast with another attack, when suddenly a high sound, like a whoosh, rang out and something hit the creature's right wing. The harpy hissed in pain and fell back. To Catwoman's amazement she could see dark blood seeping from a gash. Looking around, she saw that three women had suddenly appeared in the underground garage.
Two of them were armed, a tall raven-haired woman with a sword and the small strawberry blonde at her side with a fighting staff. The tall one lifted her left arm and plucked a metal ring from the air that had flown towards her, obviously some kind of throwing weapon. Both of them advanced on the harpy, encouraged by the third newcomer.
"Go, girls! Get her. And remember, it may not escape. We will need it."
This third woman, a beautiful curly blonde, was definitely the weirdest of the three. She was only wearing what looked like a fluffy pink negligee, not at all what you would wear when coming to a fight. Seeming to feel Catwoman's eyes on her, she looked in their direction and winked at her.
"Hello, sweetie pies. Don't worry. These two will take care of this beast."
The reminder brought Catwoman to her senses. She quickly turned to where the two newcomers were now fighting the harpy. Their speed and skill was astonishing. Some of their moves seemed beyond the humanly possible, so probably they were some kind of meta humans or whatever type of superheroes this world possessed. Still, Catwoman was not one to let others do her work and she joined the fray as well. With three of them, they could surround the harpy and attack her from all sides. It turned out that the metal ring was the weapon that could hurt the creature. A distraction of the harpy by her other two opponents allowed the raven-haired woman to swipe it across the creatures throat, finally killing it. With a last hiss, the beast died. For a second, everyone was silent. It was the curly blonde who ended the moment.
"Okay, great job, girls. But we do not have much time. This cutie here needs to go home."
She stepped up to Selina.
"So whom do I have the pleasure to meet?"
"My name's Selina. And you are?"
"These two ladies are Xena and Gabrielle. And my name's Aphrodite."
Catwoman's eyes widened.
"As in the Goddess Aphrodite?"
"Exactly. Which means, your Diana is my only sister left – well, kind of half-sister from a parallel world. You better treat her right."
Catwoman had not expected to hear the shovel-talk today.
"I plan to. Meeting her has really changed me."
Aphrodite nodded.
"Good, sweetie. Okay, this is what we do. I will send you home. You have to touch the harpy, while I do it. And please think about your loved ones. The stronger your feelings, the easier it will be to breach the barrier between worlds."
"Thank you, I will."
„I also have to warn you. The harpy did not act on its own impulse. Whoever has sent it knows powerful magics. I heard that your world has superheroes and aliens, but also supervillains. I would say, that person qualifies, since I believe it also managed to create the gate you were pushed through. I also have the feeling, it was no accident it chose a harpy, but that the sorcerer has a connection to ancient Greece and its culture. The magics used almost like felt familiar."
Selina looked worried.
"Could it be an old enemy of Diana? It was her apartment, after all."
At this moment, Gabrielle joined their exchange. The strawberry blonde nodded.
"That makes sense. In our world, Ares always had a couple of minor gods on his side. Maybe one of them survived in your world as well and now is planning revenge for Diana killing your Ares."
"Could be. I will talk with her once I am back. Maybe she has an idea who would try something like this. Also thank you, all of you, for helping me."
Her look swept from Gabrielle and Aphrodite to the others, where Xena was busy providing first aid to the injured.
Gabrielle waved it off.
"Of course we helped. We gave a promise to your partner. Please send her our greetings."
Catwoman nodded.
"Of course."
Then she went to say goodbye to the others, before the Goddess sent her home, together with the body of the harpy. It was easier than she had expected. She reappeared in the living room of 'her' Diana's apartment, managing to surprise the owner of said apartment, who obviously had just returned home. They had a very long and serious talk that night, before they could finally move on to more pleasant activities.
'The other Paris'
The rest of the group had left the fight scene immediately after Selina went home and Aphrodite had disappeared in a shower of lights. Nobody wanted to have to explain what happened to the police. They relocated to Diana's apartment, where Xena checked the different injuries more thoroughly. She made sure that Elaine's arm was set for now, but she would have to check in at a hospital the next day. Miko's claw wounds she stitched herself, since those would have been too difficult to explain. The others luckily had only minor scratches and bruises. Soon they were busy sweeping the glass away from the harpy's attack and then covering the missing window with a transparent sheet as a provisional solution.
Then it was finally time to explain to Diana who Xena and Gabrielle actually were, not to mention Aphrodite. The curator was slightly shell-shocked from this revelation, but also completely in awe. What could be better for an archaeologist than to meet somebody from the time they were researching? It was a long night for them. At the end, Xena and Gabrielle invited Diana to be part of their network of helpers – the 'sisters' as they called it. Gabrielle explained.
"We try to help people in different ways. We have seen how bravely you have fought for your friends. You might not have the powers of your twin from the other reality, but you do have her spirit. We would love to have you as a part of our sisterhood."
Diana accepted gladly.
"I always wondered what life would be like as an amazon. I guess this is the closest I can get."
Suddenly lights sparkled in the air and Aphrodite appeared once more.
"Hello girls. It's time for these two to head home."
She pointed at her two old friends, before addressing Diana.
"To the best of my knowledge, you really are human, but from now on, I will consider you family."
Diana was almost speechless.
"Wow, thank you."
After a quick set of good-byes, Aphrodite teleported the three of them away. Lara and Miko were the next to leave. Finally alone, Diana looked at her lover.
"You really have an interesting group of friends."
Elaine smiled.
"If you think my friends are special, you should see my girlfriend. She is the most beautiful woman in the world."
Diana smiled fondly.
"It that so? But unfortunately she is also very tired. Let's go to bed."
And after a sweet kiss, they did just that.
Epilogue
A little café in Paris
Diana sat at one of the small outside tables, enjoying her coffee and the sun. But even more she was enjoying the company, for Selina was here at her side. Finally she was able to show her girlfriend some of her favorite places in the city.
Hidden basement below a Parisian mansion
A woman is pacing.
"Why is she still here? I know the spell worked. I have felt it. The dumb creature must have botched it. Maybe it missed and fell through without her. But I will try again and then I will get rid of her."
The end
Author's note:
This was my way of trying a more action oriented story. I hope you liked it. As always I cannot make any promises when or what I will be writing next. I hope you understand.