I walked into Bella's room, she was wearing a maroon coloured cardigan and she was resting peacefully on her bed. I interrupted her peace and took her for a long walk, completely nervous about what I was about to tell her.
We started walking from Bella's house. We reached the dark forest and still we hadn't spoken a word. The smell of her blood was bothering me. I put my hand on my nose and moved a little away from her. The silence between us was making me more and more awkward.
"Okay, let's talk it out. What's wrong?" Bella asked finally, breaking the silence that lasted for a few kilometres.
"We are leaving Bella", I replied, "We are leaving forks."
"Why?" Bella asked out of shock; her expressions featuring her shock and disbelief.
I told her about Dr.Cullen's age thing. People have started to notice that he is not ageing. He claimed to be 33 when he was not.
I could feel the pain in her eyes. Seeing her in pain made me doubt my decision; was it really the right decision?
She received a long lasting heart break from the person she loves the most. I knew that she would want to come with me, but she couldn't, she had to stay here. It was necessary for her to stay away from me. I was sure that she was thinking about something at that moment. I wish I could read her mind.
I said no when she insisted on coming with us. How badly I wanted her to be with me. I mentioned that the place isn't right for her. She moved closer to me and she looked in my eyes. The smell of her blood was increasing my thirst. I came back to life when she said, "Why are you doing this Edward," anger visible in her voice.
"I am tired of pretending to be someone else. I am not a human," I replied, " Plus the thing that happened with Jasper...". I tried my best to sound stubborn, but I didn't. I was hesitating.
"That was nothing," she said with a heavy voice.
" Yes, it was nothing, even worse could have happened. You are not safe with me," I said. " I am not good for you."
" You are not good for me Bella," I said with a heavy heart and immense sadness in my voice. I felt tears gathering in my eyes. I somehow stopped them from pouring down.
I saw that she is numb and isn't able to utter a word. The fact that I couldn't read her mind started to kill me. It was awful that I could read everyone's mind but hers. Was she doubting herself? I knew that eventually she would forget me and move on. She will make new memories and old memories will vanish. Memories with me will vanish. She will find someone who is at least not a vampire.
" Don't take a stupid step which you will regret later and don't hurt yourself. Charlie needs you, you have to be there for him," I told her.
" I will be there for him," she assured.
" In return I promise that this will be the last time you will ever see me," I said with a sense of uncertainty in my tone. She didn't say anything and asked me about Alice. I don't know why she didn't say anything, I wish I could read her mind. I told her that Alice and others were already gone and I stayed to say goodbye to her. The smell of her blood distracted me from our conversation. We both didn't say anything.
" Don't worry Bella, time heals all wounds, memories will vanish," I impoverished the silence, ignoring all my distractions. Maybe she expected this from me or maybe she lost faith in me.
" What about your memories," she questioned.
"Well…"; I hesitated for some time," I won't forget; but we are easily distracted".
I took a step closer to her, trying to control my thirst. I took a deep breath and said
" Good bye Bella", With a teary voice. I went close to her and kissed her forehead. I made sure not to breathe for a few seconds. For the last time I tried reading her mind, but I couldn't. She was definitely thinking of something but what?