Izuku and Katsuki are 11 in this fic, and canon events were moved up, but only the ones pre-UA. They'll still be 15 at that point. Updates will be sporadic.

The first time Izuku remembered hearing his actual name come from Kacchan's mouth, he was giving up his plan to jump to his death moments later.

It wasn't meant to happen, he wasn't going to jump where Kacchan could see. Just the thought of Kacchan watching it happen was enough for him to purge the idea of suicide right from his mind but then he stumbled as he turned back from the railing.

It was an accident, a mistake. It wasn't supposed to happen. He wasn't going to jump. He didn't mean to trip, so why did he fucking trip?

He had only turned his head for a second and then he fucking tripped and Kacchan was shouting his name as he plummeted to the ground, louder than he'd ever heard him before. And then Kacchan was running to the edge of the roof.

He saw him realize that Izuku was too far away to be caught, that he was about to smash into the pavement.

He saw his eyes blown wider than he thought possible.

And he saw him start to jump right as he hit the ground.

Kacchan wasn't supposed to see.

6 Days Before: Wednesday, August 11

"Can even someone without a quirk be like you?!"

The words seemed to be wrung from his tightening throat even as they forced their way out of his mouth, and Izuku found that he was already dreading All Might's answer.

Even through the smoke and his shock, even while his greatest idol stood telling his story looking as defeated as Izuku had felt, he knew what he was going to be told.

And he didn't want to believe it.

He didn't want to believe that he was born to not be a hero in a world so dependent on them. A world where all he wanted was to help people.

But then he had no choice but to believe.

"—You need to see reality for what it is, kid."

And at first he wanted to scream, to shout at All Might, who shouldn't have even been a hero while he was so injured, that he could at least look him in the eyes as he crushed all his hopes and dreams.

He wanted to dare this hero to stare him down and tell him the same thing as he watches the light fade from a kid's eyes.

He wanted to cry, he wanted to let it all out and wait for it to disappear.

Instead, he just walks to the edge of the rooftop.

Who leaves a child on top of a roof after crushing their dreams, Izuku wondered. He was almost curious how high the building was before deciding that it didn't matter. It wouldn't matter when he hit the ground below, he wouldn't be measuring the height after jumping.

"Why not just take a swan dive off the roof and pray you'll get a quirk in the next life?"

He clenched his fist and remembered the horrified look on Kacchan's face after he said it, as if he finally realized how far he had gone.

It shouldn't have hurt so much, it wouldn't have, if only he didn't remember that time before. When they were friends.

Izuku thought back on the past few years of his life, though about all the cruel notes left on his desk, the whispered suggestions as he passed through the hall.

He thought about how it never mattered that Kacchan had staked his claim, because Izuku would never let him find out that others were bullying him too.

He thought about how sometimes Kacchan got that look in his eye like he cared so much and still left him alone. Still left sparks skittering across his body at every chance.

He stood on that rooftop and thought about the absolute bullshit he had been put through and came to a decision.

If things didn't get better, he would take Kacchan's advice and jump.

And so Izuku turned away from the edge of the roof and made his way back home, a single question on his mind.

With nothing to distract him, all he managed to do was work himself into a fevered panic as he reached for the door.

Inside, Midoriya Inko was cooking dinner and tidying up the kitchen, and as she noticed her son in the doorway she beckoned him inside for a hug.

The atmosphere was comfortable, so much so that Izuku almost started to panic again in fear of ruining it, but he had to ask the question. He had to know if his mom still refused to believe in him.

"Mom," he began. "Do you think I could ever be a hero? Even without a quirk?"

Inko froze, and although she didn't cry this time, Izuku recognized the look on her face.

"Izuku," she sighed. "I'm so sorry, but—"

Cutting her off, he quickly pushed out the words "No, no it's fine. I knew what you were going to say, and I-I've already given up on that anyways. I just wanted to know."

His mother nodded, and with a short look at his wet eyes, turned back towards the simmering foods.

Izuku decided to leave the room before she could say anything else.

That night, Izuku locked the door to his room and sobbed, unable to escape All Might's demeaning gaze as it surrounded and consumed him.