(copied from ao3 lolz) heyyy so this is actually a continuation of something my friend c00kiemonster2000 wrote on discord! you can pretty much tell what's going on but if you NEED context: zim and gaz fall asleep together and dib witnesses like 3 seconds of it.
"So I walk in, and they're on the bed, just… cuddling, or something.'
Tak halfway opened her mouth in disgust and followed Dib's gaze to his sister across the courtyard. After a moment, she put on a frown.
"I can see why you're worried; not that I'm surprised, of course."
Dib, who had nodded along to her first statement, frowned. "Huh?" He asked, finally turning to her, "What's that mean?"
"I think Zim is low enough to break his code and fraternize with a human, even if Gaz is a somewhat impressive example of your race…" Tak's eyes flicked to Dib for a moment, and she seemed to cut herself off from whatever she was about to say next. "Though, I didn't expect her to reciprocate. If she must choose a mate, it could at least be someone that would compliment her intellect. Zim is an idiot. If it helps you go unconscious at night, I don't think it goes any deeper than her humoring him."
Dib was annoyed by her jab at Gaz, but she wasn't wrong. He shuffled his feet in the grass.
"I mean, they're not dating or anything, right?"
Tak straightened her back and focused on anything that wasn't Dib.
"How should I know?"
Dib opened his mouth, closed it, and seemed to be at a loss. "He's Irken too. Can't you tell if they're… like that? I don't know."
Tak huffed and rolled her eyes, almost exasperated by the idiocy of her human companion. "Are you serious? Do you think I can read his mind?" She hissed, facing him once again.
Dib put his hands up in defense. "Okay! Sorry, I was just-"
"You're human. Gaz is human. Can you tell me what she's thinking? Pick up on her pheromones, maybe?" She asked derisively. Dib glared for a moment, but his face flushed and he looked back to the courtyard.
"Whatever." He mumbled, lowering his hands to grip the bottom of the bench. Tak crossed her arms. Dib went back to kicking up the grass. "You don't have to yell."
Tak narrowed her eyes at nothing in particular. She hated it when he resigned like that. She should be content with the fact that Dib knew she couldn't be argued with like some human, but it didn't feel as satisfying as she wanted it to.
"He can't love though, right?" Dib asked hopefully, seemingly unaffected by her outburst. Tak suddenly felt like she could breathe again.
"If Zim weren't as pak-rottingly glitched as he is, the answer would be no, but nothing can justify that much fondness for a human. He's definitely defective enough to love."
Dib let out an amused huff. "You say that like it's a bad thing."
"It is."
Hearing love talked about like it was some sort of programming error felt strange to him. Sometimes he had to remind himself that he was practically talking to a computer.
"Maybe I should fix his pak. It would keep him away from my sister, I guess." Dib said with a grin. Tak snorted.
"Dib, it would take a miracle to fix anything about him." She laughed.
"Yeah." He replied. Both smiling, and relieved the conversation took a turn, they looked back to the school and said nothing. In the distance, Gaz chatted with a blur of green standing near her.
"Can you love?" Dib blurted.
Her smile vanished. "No."
"Okay."
Dib looked to the ground. He started tapping his fingers together.
"It's the first time I've seen her sleep since… a while."
Tak hummed.
"One time I actually had to curse her, to uh, sleep… Like, a real curse."
Tak looked to him and said nothing, a silent cue to keep going. Dib sat up and practically beamed.
"I bought it online! Y'know, there's this thing called the Dark Web, and I got in touch with some sort of witch or something…"
Tak listened while her eyes fell to his hands, that were always moving around when he talked. They were fascinating. One moment they would be pointing to the distance in reference to some vague location and the next they would flutter around rapidly whenever he needed to emphasize something exciting. Tak was willing to bet that she could comprehend an entire monologue just by watching his hands. That was probably why no one listened to him; they were too mesmerized by his hands. Tak suddenly hated them. They were distracting. Dib should stop moving them around.
Abruptly they paused. They stayed just above his stomach; his fingers lightly curled to face his palms as if he needed to decide what to do with them. He's nervous, she decided, and then mentally scolded herself for paying so much attention. No, she was getting better at reading humans. That was a vital skill for any creature trying to blend in.
"Are you still mad?"
Tak stopped frowning and looked puzzled. "No. Of course not."
"Okay, uh," Dib clasped his hands together, "but yeah, that knocked her out for a few days. I think her nap with Zim was a little healthier than that; not that I would ever let it happen again. Duh. But I mean, she did sleep... Ugh, I don't know."
Tak nodded. "Was he sleeping?"
"Zim? Yeah-I think."
Tak lifted her eyebrows-which were much more prominent in her human disguise-and hummed.
"Can he sleep?" Dib asked eagerly, scooting closer. "I mean-can any Irkens sleep? I know you don't need to, but like, it's possible? Oh man, does your pak turn off when you sleep? What about your brain?"
Tak put on a small smile. She couldn't put a finger on why his questions made her feel so… important. But she was already important. It was nothing. His curiosity just emphasized the fact.
"Our state of sleep would be very similar to your own if it weren't for the pak. It's only coded to keep us productive. Despite that, our organic brain can override it, somehow, but that much vulnerability isn't desirable."
Dib nodded. It looked like he was taking notes in his head. "Which one slows down, the pak or your brain?"
"The pak slows down, definitely, but it stays online to keep our bodies stable."
"Huh."
"It's difficult, though. We have to be completely at ease with our surroundings, and that's… not often."
Dib nodded slowly, eyes going back to Zim. The alien must have been closer to Gaz than he thought.
"Gross." He muttered.
"Disgusting." She added.
"I mean… ew." He scoffed.
"Absolutely."
The sounds of other socializing school children filled the silence.
"Can you sleep, er, have you?" Dib asked, his fingers drumming on the bench.
Tak shifted. "No. I'm not going to waste my time."
Dib scoffed and Tak curled her lip.
"A bodily function is not a waste of time, Tak-"
Tak put her hand up, predicting some speech about how rest is beautiful and it's a testament to Irk's merciless expectations that she's so against it blah blah blah. Dib made some sort of confused sputter and pushed her hand away. "No! No, c'mon, you should just try it. Like I really think it'll help with all your junk."
"My… what?"
"It'll help you de-stress!"
Tak lowered her eyelids. "Why do you think I need help, Dib?"
"I-" He began, but closed his mouth again and went over what he was about to say. He brought up his hands to speak once more, but reconsidered that, too. Tak's features softened at the stuttering mess until she was just waiting for him to get himself together. "It's just good for everything, y'know? Uh, your bones and mood and whatever. Sleep has a bunch of benefits that Irkens just haven't tapped into yet."
Tak liked the notion of having some sort of advantage over her own kind. The amount of time she would have to spend at her weakest wasn't appealing, but she found herself considering it.
"What's it like?" She inquired.
"Oh, uh, you just don't exist for a while. It sounds kinda weird when I say it like that, but yeah."
"Hmm." She squinted, wondering if she could possibly record her vitals before and after a session so she could observe the 'benefits.' It was worth an experiment.
Dib chewed on his lip, using all of his mental capacity to phrase a question without sounding too eager.
"Do you… are you gonna try it?"
Tak thought for a moment. "I suppose so."
"Good! Uh, good. You're not gonna need help or anything, but…"
Tak, taking notice of the H word, narrowed her eyes at him. This did nothing to smooth out his demeanor.
"You don't wanna be alone, right? I mean, anything could happen while you're knocked out. Just saying, you could try it at my base-uh, house. My house."
Tak, surprisingly, didn't know how to interpret his offer.
"...I think my base is safer, thank you." But the statement hurt. It didn't even resonate with herself, so she continued before he could even try to act indifferent. "Wait-no, I'll accept. Just in case…"
In case nothing. She thought bitterly. There was no practical reason for his base to be preferable over her own and the reason to why she would even consider it was lost on her. She had no idea what Dib meant to her; and in moments like this it made her dilemma all the more frustrating. All she knew was that for some unknown and stupid reason she wanted to be with him attempting to sleep instead of treating it like the research opportunity that it was.
Dib looked relieved. "Cool. It's a sleepover."
"That's a ridiculous name for it, but okay."
"Haha, yeah."
"I suppose there's no concern of being… exposed?"
"Huh? Oh, no, my dad is like never home, so you won't even need your disguise. Wait, that sounds so weird. I guess it doesn't matter, uh… I meant that-"
"Stop talking. So there's no way I'll be in any danger?"
"Yes. No danger."
"Good."
Again they stopped talking. The bell was about to ring and Dib was ready for it.
"You're good with tonight?"
"Sure."
"Cool." He replied, and she noticed the smallest smile on his lips.
"I better wake up with all my organs." She added.
"Pssh, if I wanted to dissect you I would have done it by now."
"Oh, I'm sure you would have survived trying."
"Yeah, right." He chuckled.
The bell rang and it wasn't long before everyone took notice and started to trudge their way inside. The two soon followed.
"So I'll see you…?"
"Tonight." She was suddenly very businesslike. "At seven. I'll bring everything. Don't tell Zim; he'll know my base isn't being guarded."
"Got it." Dib smiled, but Tak didn't return the gesture. Nevertheless, she too was excited for the strictly educational slumber experiment.
tysm 4 reading ily! there'll probs be 1 or 2 more chapters idk. check out c00kiemonster2000's acc cuz she p much inspired this story. she has an amazin zagr/datr series going on rn so pls give it a read k byeeeee x)