Summary: Stefan has a nightmare the night after he gets away from Klaus.
Blood… so much of it… everywhere.
Hundreds of faces, innocent faces played over and over through my mind.
Their cries getting softer and softer as the life gets sucked out of their eyes by a monster.
Panic spreads throughout my whole entire being as I realize that the monster was me.
Their last moments replaying through my mind as I remember each and every one of their terrified faces before I sucked the life out of them.
Suddenly her face takes over every single thought in my mind, although all I can see is sheer terror in her beautiful chocolate brown eyes.
Elena I thought as I attempted to sprint towards her, but I could not move, I was trapped.
I struggled with all the power in my body to get to her, to protect her, but everything was useless.
I was forced to watch her shriek before my sharp teeth sunk into her neck.
Her screams took over my senses, but I was stuck in place, unable to move.
All I could do was scream her name over and over,
"ELENA, ELENA, ELENA!"
I jolted up in bed as the dream- no, the memories replayed in my mind.
I could not breathe, my mind reeling as the images circulated through my mind unable to get rid of them.
I was not aware of anything besides the faces of the innocent people who I have murdered.
Defenseless children, mothers, fathers, and Elena.
Oh Elena
I actually bit her… hurt her.
God not Elena, no no no no no
How could I have possibly done this to her?
The room began to spin as I felt like I was about to pass out.
I quickly got out of bed and sprinted to the bathroom.
The moment I felt the cold tile beneath my feet I collapsed on the floor.
"What have I done, what have I done," I croaked out as I began to weep into the cool floor.
My body convulsing as tears fell down my warm cheeks.
I pulled my knees into my chest cradling myself back and forth unable to move, even sitting up was an unfathomable task.
I was so caught up in my own thoughts that I did not even realize I was not alone.
I slowly turned my head to see Elena lying down right next to me on the floor.
A shudder went down my spine as I felt her soft hands gently caressing the sides of my face as she whispered inaudibly into my ear.
Then the memories of biting her overflowed into my mind as I pulled away from her touch and sped into the farthest corner of the room from her.
I did not deserve her… her love, her compassion, her forgiveness.
After everything I have put her through, after all the pain I have caused, I did not deserve her.
Through my tears I could see her slowly walking towards me, her eyes consumed with a sadness I have never seen before.
She finally approached me and tenderly pulled me into her arms.
"Shhh- Let it all out. I love you so much Stefan. I've got you, I've got you" she softly whispered into my ear.
She gently stroked the back of my head as my face fell onto her shoulder.
At this moment I became too weak to resist her touch, all I could do was relax into her embrace.
Her mere presence was enough to soothe me.
As my cries subsided I looked back up into her eyes and what I saw broke me all over again.
Tears were steadily falling down her cheeks, and her eyes looked so sad, so broken.
I could tell she was trying her absolute best to stay strong for me, but she could not disguise the pain written all over her beautiful features.
No- I thought to myself.
I hurt her again, she is in pain because of me… this is all my fault.
I turned away from her as I softly croaked out, "I am so so sorry," as new tears began to form in my eyes.
The guilt almost became too much to bear… I have to leave… get as far away from here as possible… as far away from her.
What if I hurt her again?
My heart begins to beat faster and faster and my breathe cannot catch up.
I begin to hyperventilate on the floor wanting nothing more than to get as far away from here as possible, but just the thought of leaving her makes my body go cold.
I silently cursed myself for how selfish that thought was.
I should leave, I am not right for her, she deserves someone good, someone pure, and I am not that person.
She gently grasped my trembling face between her hands and slowly pulled it to hers forcing our eyes to meet.
She then whispered, "I love you, Stefan," before she pressed her lips against mine with all the love that she had.
In that moment, when our lips connected, my head instantly cleared and all I could think about was the angle right beside me.
God, she is everything- I would give anything, do anything to make her smile.
Her lips on mine was a moment of bliss in its truest form, but when she finally pulled back, the fear and guilt quickly crept back in.
She could automatically see in my eyes that whatever was torturing me returned.
Without hesitation she crawled into my arms as she nuzzled her head into my chest.
She placed her small hand on my upper chest as she rubbed circles around it, attempting to slow my breathing.
After a few moments she looked back up at me and gave me a warm smile, but I could tell it was filled with sadness.
"It's okay, everything is going to be okay," she reached for my hand and intertwined her fingers with mine before she continued, "I know these past couple of months have been hell for you, but you will get through this, I promise. I am right here and never going anywhere, no matter how long it takes. I love you Stefan, with my whole heart"
I looked away from her again before I spoke, our hands still intertwined on my chest.
"H-How can you s-say that? A-After everything I have d-done to you, h-how can you s-still
l-love me?" I croaked out tears stinging my eyes.
I composed myself before I spoke again, "I bit you Elena- I hurt you. I thought I hit rock bottom in the 20s but after that night I never wanted to feel again."
She slowly placed her hand on the side of my face and moved my head, so it was facing hers again.
"That wasn't you, Stefan. When you were with Klaus you were someone else. I know you Stefan- you are good and pure, and I love you for it. Let everything in, the guilt, the pain, all of it. I will be here through it all because I love you and I will until the day I die."
She stood up and reached her hand out to me.
I unsteadily took it and she led me back to the bed gently pulling me down with her under the covers.
I buried my face into her neck letting all my emotions out.
Everything that I have buried deep inside for the past three months just unleashed themselves.
I felt her lips gently stroking my hair as I cried.
Every once in a while I could faintly hear her whispering something to me, as her hand delicately rubbed circles down my lower back.
I don't know what I did to deserve her, but I have never been more grateful for another human in my existence.
I looked up at her and without me saying a word she knew that I was silently thanking her.
My eyes began to feel heavy and the last thing I saw before I fell back asleep was the face of an angle, my angle.