Hey, guys! That Neo Geo bug is getting to me keeping me from Fanfiction for some time now. But hey, I'm here for another Roger Rabbit story which is a collection of shorts starring the hyperactive bunny. I wish Disney+ would just make a TV series already with Roger Rabbit similar to HBO Max's Looney Tunes Cartoons. Anyway, Who Framed Roger Rabbit belongs to Disney not me. Let's get It.
====Episode 1: BC Rabbit======
The cartoon intro opened up with a portrait of Roger Rabbit and Baby Herman smiling before the title card of Baby Herman showed up while the theme jingle played. The short title BC Rabbit showed up on screen before the short begins.
Somewhere in the prehistoric era, a certain rabbit wearing a loincloth stood beside a cavebaby drinking a mastodon milk bottle was greeted by the latter's mother who wore a doeskin dress. She was smiling at her baby boy as he giggled and cooed in front Of their stone house. The mother planned to go somewhere but had to explain things to the two boys.
"Now, Herman. I'll be off to the grocery store for some milk, pterodactyl drumsticks and brontosaurus steaks. Roger here will keep an eye on you until I get back.", the mother said sweetly to her baby boy as his sitter Roger Rabbit nodded acting like a soldier accepting a mission.
"You can count on me, ma'am! Herman's in good hands!", he said enthusiastically.
"Good. If anything bad happens to my sweet little Herman, I'll make a hat out of you yet! Do you understand?!", she threatened Roger scaring the toon rabbit silly. His teeth chattered with a thought cloud showing Roger turned into a hat followed by him ending up as a rug with his tongue sticking out.
"P-P-Please! I won't let ya down! Nothing will come of Herman! I swear! P-P-Please!", Roger begged. The mother smiled and kissed Herman on the forehead before taking off.
"Now be a good little baby to Roger until I get back. Toodles!", she said as she went into her car to get to the grocery store. You know the one from the Flintstones? Yep. That's the car she took off In.
"Now what can we do today, Herman? Storytime? Peek-a-boo? Wagon rides?"
"RAAAAAAAAWK!
"Wheeeeeeee! Higher! Higher!", Roger heard a screech followed by a familiar giggle. He grew confused as he continued.
"Higher? Whaddya mean, Herman?"
RAWK!
Roger was startled by the noise and Looked up in shock and panic as his eyes bugged out of his sockets with his mouth agaped. He spotted a pterodactyl carrying Herman up in the sky.
"YIPE! Hey, put Herman down right now! You birdbrain!", Roger yelled at the flying dinosaur with Herman giggling at the worried rabbit. The pterodactyl screeched angrily and flew away with Herman in tow. Roger then gulped knowing what would happen if Herman's mother found Out what happened. He then ran after the captor in hopes of bringing Herman back.
"I'll save you, BAAAABYYYYYY!", Roger yelled Out before running after the pterodactyl. He ran as hard as he possibly could. He ran until he stepped on a rock and tripped into a tree.
"WAAAAHH!"
"BWHAAACK!
Roger saw tweeting tyrannodons as his eyes went in circles as he tries to recover his bearings. He danced in circles staggering as he mumbled something.
"But, Mommy. I don't wanna go to school! I want to stay home and bake cookies with you!", he said goofily before falling flat on his face. The screech of the pterodactyl and Herman giggling can be heard as Roger lost track of them.
Roger paced back and forth trying to figure out what to do in order to rescue Herman from the flying dinosaur. His Long ears picked up the sound of the captor and Herman as he figured out the direction.
"There's that good-for-nothing dinosaur with Herman! If I don't do something, my goose is cooked!", he whimpered. He then spotted a brontosaurus eating some leaves until it spotted Roger jumping onto his tail and onto his back.
"Hey, big guy! Wanna give me a ride? Help a rabbit out, p-p-please?!", Roger begged only for the brontosaurus to snort indicating that he wanted to be left alone. Desperate Roger is being, he pulled out a whip from out of nowhere as the fanfare from a horse race played. The herbivorous dino glared at Roger wanting the rabbit off his back. Roger being the idiotic dweeb that he is began to cock the whip over his shoulder with a grin.
"Giddyup, little bronty! Yee-haw!", Roger whipped the dinosaur causing it to get angry bellowing. It bucked and snorted with Roger yelling holding on to the beast's neck only to get thrown onto the ground. Roger then dusted himself off and complained to the brontosaurus.
"Hey, bub! What was that for?! I got a baby to save and you won't help a rabbit Out!", Roger yelled only to receive a heavy snort from the large beast indicating his anger from getting whipped. Roger gulped laughing nervously as the dinosaur walked dangerously closer.
"N-Nice dinosaur. Let's not get angry now. That's a good boy! Okay now you're getting into my personal space! I demand you to sit!", the rabbit said only for the brontosaurus to glare harder raising one eyebrow.
"P-P-Please?! Uh-oh!"
ROOOOOOOOOO!
"AAAAAAAAAHH! P-P-P-Please! Let's not get hasty! We'll work this thing Out!", Roger begged as he ran from the charging brontosaurus. The two ran all over the neighborhood wrecking the yards in the process.
"At this rate, that dinosaur will save me the trouble of being somebody's throw rug.", Roger said as he spotted the pterodactyl in the distance carrying Herman.
"Wheeee! Birdie go faster!", Herman cooed as the pterodactyl screeched in the air. Roger heard this and yelled out to the baby.
"Don't worry, Herman! I'm figuring things Out to save ya! I got an angry brony on my tail!", Roger said as the dinosaur bellowed ready to butt Roger. The chase lasted a bit more until Roger ran in midair with the brontosaurus stopping at a cliff in confusion. Roger looked back at the dinosaur and sighed in relief.
"Jeepers! I lost that big guy standing at the edge of the cliff! Edge of the cliff?!", Roger then yelped realizing that he was in midair away from the cliff looking down at the water below and looked at the viewers watching him with a pale expression on his face.
"Oh boy. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!", Roger plummeted down to the water below screaming as the brontosaurus at the cliff turned around and walked away to who knows where. The poor rabbit screamed until he hits the water with a splash.
Bubbles rose from the water until Roger popped up for air as he saw Herman and his captor still flying in the sky. The rabbit goofily squeezed the water out of his ears not giving up on rescuing Herman.
"Looks Like I'm not all washed up yet! What could possibly go wrong?"
GRRRR!
Roger paled at the sound as he checked his stomach for a second.
"My stomach is talking to me. I haven't had any carrot soup yet!"
GRRRR!
"Wait a minute! That's not my stomach!", right Roger was for a pair of angry eyes dipped down earlier and popped out behind the rabbit. It then showed up as a large crocodile with Roger looking behind him as It opened it's jaws ready to eat him.
"Jeepers! You don't want to eat me! I'm all skin and bones! See?!", Roger said persuading the reptile showing it his small size only for the croc not to listen.
"Oh come on! I don't taste good in pea soup!", Roger whined only for the croc to happily lick it's lips at the possibility of pea soup with rabbit in It. Roger gulped as the croc smiled evilly ready to go after him.
"See ya later, alligator! After while crocoDIIIIILE!", Roger yelled as the croc snapped it's jaws with the rabbit running on the water for his life as the croc gave chase. The croc swam and chomped at Roger as the rabbit ran screaming. Roger kept running and screaming until he spotted land dead ahead. However, he had to figure out some way to lose the crocodile and fast.
"Land hoooo!", Roger yelled as he pulled something out of his loincloth being a pepper shell as he shook it at the crocodile's nose. The pepper flakes went up it's nose as the large beast began to sneeze as he inhale.
"AH-AH-AH-ACHOOOOOO!", the prehistoric croc made a large sneeze blowing Roger away in the process. He waved at the croc goodbye as he flew towards the land.
Roger was relieved getting away from the croc until he slammed right into a coconut tree. He then slid off the trunk in comic fashion as he landed on the ground with a coconut hitting his head leaving a lump to grow out of his head sporting a flag on it.
"Jeepers! What a rough landing!", he babbled until someone came to his rescue.
"Oh my! Are you okay?", a female voice asked in concern as Roger snapped Out of his stupor and looked at the figure as a jazy saxophone piece played with the rabbit panting like a dog. And rightfully so as the figure revealed to be Jessica wearing a fur bikini similar to the one Raquel Welch wore in the film 1 Million Years BC showing off her buxom and statuesque beauty. Roger had hearts in his eyes as the redhead came over to tend to his needs.
"Hubba-hubba! Yes, ma'am! I thought I was going to be croc chow for sure!", Roger said not taking his eyes off the beautiful cavewoman. Jessica picks Roger up in her arms and soothes the rabbit.
"Well I'm glad you're okay. What's your name?", the island beauty asked as Roger smiled.
"I'm Roger. Nice to meet ya, ummm."
"Jessica."
"Oh okay.", Roger said after the cavewoman introduced herself. The redhead then had a curious look on her face.
"I'm curious but how did you travel so far?", she asked as Roger sheepishly grinned.
"Long story short, let's just say I had help from a dinosaur and a hungry croc. Anyway, have you seen a baby being carried away by a flying pterodactyl?", Roger asked. Jessica rubbed her chin in thought until something came to mind.
"You know, I did see a pterodactyl flying with a baby nearby my island. We gotta do something to rescue it.", Jessica said in worry as Roger with some hope asked the beauty another question.
"And where would the pterodactyl nest at? It got Herman and I need to get him back.", Roger said as Jessica nodded in understanding.
"The pterodactyl nests in the jungle straight ahead. I'll help you out in saving him.", she said eager to help the rabbit Out. However, sounds of angry yelling directed at Roger came from a mob of cavemen wanting some attention from the redheaded beauty.
"Hey, you! We saw her first! Let's skin this Long-eared bozo and get our beauty back!", the lead caveman yelled waving his club at Roger as the other cavemen agreed wanting to get Roger. Jessica annoyed at the cavemen's failed advances carried Roger as she ran away from the mob.
"Let's get out of here! Something tells me that I'm not there biggest fans!", Roger said as Jessica nodded.
"Those cavemen doesn't know how to take no for an answer if it bit them in the butt. I have an idea! Let's get in that buggy over there!", Jessica noted as she pointed to a stone buggy with the cavemen giving chase. The two rushed over as the cavemen angrily try to get at Roger and take Jessica away for mainly the leader of the group.
"Don't let them get away!", the leader cried out as the men relentlessly chased Roger and Jessica. Thankfully, the buggy was yards away giving Roger and Jessica time to escape the mob.
"There it is! Let's hurry and Jump in before the mob gets you!", Jessica said as Roger gulped.
"You're telling me! They want to skin me! Or pop me first and then skin me!", Roger stammered. The duo then got into the buggy with Jessica at the wheel as she ran Flintstone style to start the buggy. They then took off into the jungle with the cavemen losing hope unable to outrun the vehicle. They soon gave up and went back home.
Back with Jessica and Roger, they were in pursuit of Herman and the pterodactyl as they rode through the jungle. Jessica sighed in relief as the cavemen were nowhere to be found.
"That was a relief. We lost them for sure. Now we'll have to look for the baby before he becomes food for the pterodactyl's chicks.", Jessica noted as Roger gasped with his eyes bugging out.
"Food?! Oh no! I'll be good as a shag rug for sure!", Roger gulped with Jessica confused of what the rabbit was talking about.
"What do you mean by that?", Jessica wondered as Roger sheepishly rubbed his head with his ears.
"I was suppose to babysit Herman while his mom went to the store. But before I could take Herman into the house, that pterodactyl took him away. If I don't get him back, she's going to turn me into a hat or a rug! Help me, p-p-p-please!", the rabbit blubbered as Jessica calmed the rabbit.
"It's going to be all right. We'll get him back for sure. The dinosaur's nest isn't that far off.", Jessica noted giving Roger hope. However, they heard a roar behind them as Roger's ears perked up.
"Jeepers! What was that?!", the rabbit wondered as Jessica looked back and gasped at a huge T-Rex smiling hungrily chasing after them. Hmm. This seems familiar like I've seen something like this before.
"It's a T-Rex! We can't stop for anything! We need to lose it somehow!", Jessica yelled as they pushed the buggy to the limit trying their best to get away from the hungry dinosaur. The rabbit asked Jessica something.
"Do you have a slingshot?", Roger asked.
"Yes. Why?", Jessica wondered.
"I may have something to ward off that dino fellow! See?", Roger said pulling out a bag of pepper flakes. Jessica raised an eyebrow at the object but soon frowned.
"That'll make it angry for sure! We'll sure be lunch by then!", Jessica said not liking the sound of Roger's plan. However, Roger grinned confidently as he took Jessica's slingshot putting the pepper flakes on it ready to get launched onto the ravenous dinosaur.
"Don't worry, Jessica! What could possibly go wrong?"
ROOOOAAAAARRRRR!
Jessica saw the dinosaur get closer and glared at Roger for a moment.
"Don't jynx it, buster! And don't you dare fire that thing! We'll lose the dinosaur the right way! We'll lure it near a cliff and then you'll fire it in it's eyes. That brute will get blinded and fall into that chasm.", Jessica told Roger as he grinned and saluted.
"Yes, ma'am! Anything to not get wound up being dino chow!", Roger smiled as the two executed the plan while the T-Rex roared stomping after the buggy. Once they were near the cliff's path, Jessica barked orders at Roger to fire the slingshot.
"Now, Roger! Fire away!"
"Here goes nothin'! Take this, you big lizard!", Roger yelled firing the pepper flakes into the dinosaurs eyes blinding it as the beast sneezed and roared in comical fashion. It ran veering away from it's prey and careened off the cliff area into a chasm hitting it's head against the rocks which in turn conked it on the head knocking him out as flying tyrannodons flew over his head.
"Yay! We got 'em!", Roger cheered. The duo were relieved they've lost track of the T-Rex but heard the pterodactyl screech up ahead. Jessica looked up and saw Herman's captor carrying him still. The baby still giggled enjoying the ride unaware that the flying dino intended to make him it's meal.
"There she is! That pterodactyl is almost at her nest! We have no time to waste!", the redhead said as the two hustled after the dino.
"Hang on, Herman! Uncle Roger's comin'!", the rabbit yelled as the duo rescues Herman. The pterodactyl heard this and grew surprised and frustrated at the same time. The dino couldn't let a measly rabbit and a cavewoman now in the mix ruin her chances of feeding her chicks. The crafty dino had tricks up her sleeve as she screeched an SOS to her fellow pterosaurs. The flock then screeched ready to stop Roger and Jessica.
"Do you hear that?", Jessica said in concern as Roger nodded but his Jaws dropped at the sight before him.
"YIPE! We got company and they're not happy one bit! I think we're on the menu tonight!", the rabbit said as the flock went after them. The duo screamed for their lives as they drove the buggy throughout the jungle dodging sabertooth cats, carnivorous plants, snakes and bees but Roger suffered bee stings wearing bandages. The buggy unfortunately launched into the air from a ramp which knocked both Jessica and Roger out the vehicle and into the air. They screamed until both pterosaurs picked them up carrying them to the mother's nest which was a blessing in disguise for Herman was in sight babbling happily as pterodactyl chicks peeped wanting food.
"There he is! Herman, I'm right here! I'll save you!", Roger said as Herman looked up at the rabbit and cavewoman carried by the pterosaurs gets dropped into the nest.
The mother dino smiled ravenously at the two new arrivals and Herman as she uses a sharp stone stick to sharpen her beak and licked her lips with a smile.
"Don't tell me she's sharpening her beak before she feeds us to her babies!", Roger blubbered.
"Yes. We're on the menu. But how are we going to save Herman and ourselves?", Jessica scared wondered how she and Roger can pull this off. Suddenly, a lightbulb came over Roger's head as the rabbit grinned mischievously. Jessica raised an eyebrow wondering what was going on with the rabbit.
"What seems to be funny? I don't think being a dinosaur's lunch is a laughing matter.", she said crossing her arms until Roger shook his head.
"Nope. I have an idea to bust us out of here. There's some giant feathers that make up the nest. We can use them to get us out of here.", Roger said as Jessica nodded agreeing with the idea.
"That's a brilliant idea but how are we going to do that? Those pterosaurs will find out we're gone under their watch.", Jessica said as Herman crawled over to Jessica prompting the redhead to pick him up in her arms while Roger plucked off some feathers. This made the pterosaur angry as she screeched for the rabbit to stop. However, the rabbit didn't yield as he made the feathers into wings for himself and Jessica to use. Once the coast was clear, the two heroes and Herman took the opportunity to escape. This freaked Out the mother pterosaur making her angry and her chicks angry as well. Roger gazed at the pterosaur and taunted her.
"You'll never take us alive! We're nobody's lunch! You hear me?! No one's lunch, buster!", Roger taunted as the breeze carried Roger, Jessica and Herman off. However, the mother dino wasn't going down without a fight. Jessica gasped and squealed in panic as the dinosaur screeched giving chase.
"She's after us! Look out! AAAAH!", she screamed as the pterosaur swooped and captured Jessica and Herman.
"Save me!", Jessica said.
"Huh?", Roger asked wanting her to speak clearly.
"SAAAVE ME!", Jessica yelled louder as Roger had to think fast. The rabbit whipped out a stone and threw it upside the dino's face angering it. Roger glared at the dino not backing down.
"Look here, birdbrain! Let go of her and Herman or it's pterodactyl drumsticks tonight!", the rabbit said only for the pterosaur to laugh at him not taking this seriously. The rabbit then saw the other pterosaurs surrounding him ready to attack. Just before they can do so, Roger pulled out a whistle of sorts and blew on it. It didn't make a noise for Jessica, Roger and Herman can't hear it but somehow, it irritated the pterosaurs giving them pain screeching. The mother dino couldn't take the sound losing grip of Jessica who is still holding Herman fell out of the talons. Jessica screamed while Herman whimpered causing Roger to swoop down and catch them bridal style. However, the combined weight of Jessica and Herman was too much for Roger to handle in the air causing them to plummet into a nearby village crashing into a hut with all three crawling out of the rubble with Jessica and Herman unscathed. However, Roger dazed had flying birds over his head as an angry bellow rang out.
"Cut! Cut! Cut!", the barking order came from the director Raul who was not pleased at all for some reason. Herman then grumbled at Roger while Jessica knew her bunny husband did his best in her eyes. Raul then continued his ranting at Roger.
"Roger, what the hell was that?! Why wasn't there flying tyrannodons over your head?! This is the prehistoric age for dang sake!", the director said continuing on his warpath. Roger smiled nervously while Herman gave his friend and co-star a piece of his mind.
"Damn it, Rog! After all those decades, you still futz up your lines! Of all the damn years! I need a cigar! I'll be in my trailer!", Herman yelled as Roger called out to both Raul and Herman.
"P-P-Please! At least the majority of the show is all good, right? Come On! It's not that bad!", Roger begged as Raul and Herman huffed. However, Jessica picks up her husband up to her ample breasts with a smile on her face.
"Pay no mind to them, Honey Bunny. You did great out there today. You were wonderful as a caveman.", she said genuinely as Roger smiled.
"You bet I did, Love Cups! We put on a great show! You look great in that fur bikini!", he complimented as Jessica appreciated her husband's kind honesty. She smiled seductively carrying Roger off.
"How about we celebrate with something you'll love tonight?", she said as Roger named some of the games he'd love to try out.
"Is It Canasta? Chess? Neo Geo? Parcheesi? Sega?", Roger guessed as Jessica had a naughty grin on her face.
"How about a game of "patty-cake"?", she said as Roger's smile grew wider at the mention of his pastime with his wife.
"Oh that's so nice.", Roger said happily as the couple left the studio dubbed Disney Animation Studio. You see, Disney in the 21st Century bought out RK Maroon Studios and decided to make Roger's cartoons appear on a streaming service belonging to the head mouse himself. As for Roger and Jessica, they decided to head on home for the night for a little fun so to speak.
A/N: And that's the first chappy to Roger Rabbit's Wacky Toons. There's more where that came from as I brainstorm other shorts to add to the fic. As for my other projects, I may discontinue Disney Kart and introduce my sports fic series dubbed Baseball Stars based off the SNK game of the same name but it involves an anthology of Disney, Hanna-Barbera, WB, DreamWorks and more competing on the diamond in tournaments or dream matches depending on the sequels. Feel free to review, fav and follow this fic. It means a Lot and also PM me some ideas for Roger Rabbit shorts as It would help me plan some Out better. As always, LilMancub Out and I'll see y'all in the next one.