Dragnet 2021: The Big Suzumiya
by
C V Ford
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The story you are about to read is true. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.
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Prologue:
"Mmmph!" The young man bumped the desk, sending the bottle off the edge.
Phillip Oskarsbourg paid the tumbling soft drink no mind. Lighting set, subject centered and cameras running with new memory cards ... and Mom away shopping ... the "shoot" was about to begin.
This was to be no tawdry, off the cuff cell phone cam presentation. His weeks long planning, "production design", better equipment and editing software assured him of "one for the digital ages".
The hardest part was with himself. As an "incel" (1) with quite a collection of porn and hentai on various storage mediums, the last two weeks of abstinence in physical preparation were ... excruciating.
It would all be worth it though. With the principal "shoot" about to be done and editing to start tomorrow, he would "celebrate" the rest of the day and well into the night.
Deep kneebending and with cameras "rolling", he positioned himself for the first and final act.
Yes ... ONE FOR THE DIGITAL AGES ...
Phillip Oskarsbourg not knowing within the next few moments it was going to be one for the Darwins.
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"One Adam Twelve, One Adam Twelve. See the woman. 3578 Adams. Possible 245 in progress."
"One Adam Twelve to dispatch, we receive and copy. On way to scene." Older officer set the mic back in its clip.
"That's back of us," the younger driving.
"Right! Hit it!"
Pulling an abrupt U-turn, the now sirening LAPD Interceptor lurched back north.
"One Adam Twelve, One Adam Twelve. Be advised EMS and Fire have also been dispatched. One or both may be on scene on your arrival."
"One Adam Twelve to Dispatch we copy."
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Badge 714:
This is the city, Los Angeles, California.
The "City of Angels" means many things to many people. What comes for most is that of the field of entertainment. Entertainment of all kinds including the big three, television, radio, and of course, motion pictures.
For the past several decades the digital realm has enhanced, enriched and in part eclipsed entertainments' various venues. Even going so far as to offer challenging alternatives to the other three.
While most such alternatives are above ground and viewable by the general public there are some meant for a more "specialized" clientele ... and the suppliers of such of an even more "specialized" character.
At times various elements of such alternatives cross a line of legality in one way or another thus involving law enforcement.
That's where I come in.
My name is Friday.
I carry a badge.
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Dragnet 2021
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It was on a Thursday. My partner Pep Streebek and I were working Daywatch, downtown out of Homicide doing paperwork. Having caught up and being late morning, we decided on an early lunch. Much to my delight and my partners' semi-abject disgust, we were on our way to my favorite Coney Island joint when the call came in.
"Four Kilo Seven, Four Kilo Seven. See the woman. 3578 Adams. Possible 187 may have occurred."
"There goes lunch."
"I'm not complaining." Pep hitting siren and flooring it.
Streebek and his terminal health food kick!
"Dispatch this is Four Kilo Seven. Cancelling code seven and on way to scene."
"Four Kilo Seven, be advised. One Adam Twelve and One Canada Three on scene. Units of Fire and EMS also. Officers will inform."
"Four Kilo Seven to Dispatch, we copy."
"One Adam Twelve?" Pep asking. "That's Malloy and Reed."
"Sure is."
We arrived minutes later at a modest looking frame house. Nothing remarkable and fit in with the rest of the areas' nondescript architecture. Two marked units, an EMS wagon and a small Fire tanker out front being packed and stowed. Their assistance not needed.
On entering we were met by Officer Malloy. In the living room an extremely distraught woman on sofa being interviewed and consoled by a "dog and cat" team (2) of the other unit and a paramedic.
"Downstairs." Malloy indicating cellar door.
Descending we passed through the first washer/dryer occupied basement section and into a tiled larger area. There we found a fire marshal, two paramedics and officer Reed standing around a covered body in the middle of what doubled as a bedroom and recreation room.
Recreation of a unique kind.
"Dispatch wasn't sure just what Mrs. Oskarsbourg," Malloy nodding upward indicating the distraught woman on the above floor, "was getting at. Quite incoherent. Dispatch assumed the worst and we got called in along with EMS and Fire. On finding it was a death it was changed to a possible 187."
"Good call I'd say," Friday noting the porta-lights illuminating the scene. "This?"
"Power was out when we arrived. Good thing too as far as the fire marshal's concerned."
"What we've got so far," Reed in continuance, "is between the time Mrs. Oskarsbourg went out to do some morning shopping and when she got back, the power went out. Returning from shopping she went down here to ask her son if he could do anything about it. That's when she found him like this."
The older of the two paramedics drew back the cover revealing ...
The body of a rather corpulent, soft looking, bearded young man clad in a light green T-shirt ... and nothing else.
The shirt itself emblazoned with what looked to be a cartoon-like "tiger piglet" character.
The corpse lay in semi-contorted spread eagle/gingerbread man fashion. Of a position not unlike that of what some cartoon characters assume when pole-axed.
Friday and Streebek lifted their eyes and scanned about the large room.
Several bookcases covering one wall, shelves filled with what looked to be strange looking, thick comic books with alien lettering on the spines. Another shelved wall crammed two deep with tapes and disks of other worldly animated films and series. Asian hieroglyphed posters adorning the walls featured colorfully bizarre, huge eyed, characters, many of grotesque creatures but mostly women and girls.
Some looking quite ... young.
Continuing their scan, the duos' eyes took in a wall of shelves consisting mainly of plastic models and figurines. While some were of the usual kind, military, sci-fi, etc., the vast majority were of the same types of subject on the posters.
"Not exactly Aurora monster kits, are they?" Commented Streebek.
"No, not quite what we were collecting back in the day."
Friday continued his sweeping the panorama of mostly provocatively posed, scantily clad, some even naked, well endowed figurines. Here and there the vision of an obviously prepubescent female subject also in previous mentioned various states made itself noticed.
Skins crawling, both men suppressed a mutual shudder.
They were not pitying the present deceased much at that moment.
In complete circumvention, the last wall contained a bed, computer table and desk. Between desk and corpse ...
A bent down goose-necked lamp and two close to the floor mounted video cameras aimed at a pedestal mounted figurine. A trail of dark liquid pooling up against it, the dribble leading along the lamps' FRAYED power cord and the partially empty bottle of Croaka-Cola at the foot of the computer table.
The figurine looked interesting. Just over eight inches high, posed in spread legged kneel, body leaning back, arms straight back in support. Clad in black color matching high heels, mesh stockings, tight clinging "leotard". Head topping it with a large eyed, smiling countenance framed with medium length, yellow be-ribboned medium brown hair and black bunny ears.
And partly splattered in-
In quick disgust, both abruptly turned from the figurine to the others present. Nodding and eye rolling evident among the rest.
"This isn't," Friday not amused, "what I think-"
"Afraid it is sir," Malloy in reply.
"It can't- ... it's too-," Streebek not knowing whether to give a wry short "laugh" or gag trying to look as neutral/professional as he could muster.
"On arrival I noted the power out as reported," the Fire Marshall speaking for the first time. "Checking the house I noticed a LOT of appliances plugged in the house.
"The fuse box," he pointed through the door to a wall opposite the washer/dryer, "is a low output/load type. The lights and vid cameras here weren't quite what put the circuit breaker over the edge. All the system needed was a nudge and ...
"What this young man did put the system ... and him ... over the line."
"Hmm ... ," Friday in aloud thought. "... and if these cameras were running up to the moment-"
"That's what we thought sir." Reed
"Also being battery powered we could check right now. Should have date and exact time of death." Friday speculated. "But we don't touch anything and let Forensics pick this scene up. Though for the moment this looks pretty much open and shut.
"What I don't understand though," Joe trying not to look at the on-floor figurine and almost not succeeding, "is why that particular figurine? What's so special about it?"
"I ...," the younger of the paramedics, looking to be in his twenties, about the same age as the deceased, chiming in and raising his hand, "... might have an idea."
The group looked over at the young man now standing at the shelves of mini-statuary.
"Go ahead son."
Both detectives walking up.
"Well," the young man hesitant and pointing at an area on the shelf, "the figma ... er ... figurine is that of the title character of a quite popular anime from over a decade ago ... The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya."
"The ... What?"
In closer, the two noted the grouping of pieces the paramedic was indicating. Some of them of the same character on the floor. One an exact copy.
"It was about a girl who happened to be God ... or at least with omnipotent powers ... but didn't know it. It was up to her friends," he indicating some of the other pieces, "to make sure she'd never find out or the universe would go into the tank. Series is still quite popular ... lotta' fans."
"Figma?" Friday noting the paramedic wasn't mispronouncing when he said the term.
"Uh ... 'Engrish' ... for figurine."
" 'Engrish' ... ," taking in the jargon and the panorama of plastic Friday speculated. "Anime ... That Japanese cartoon genre ... giant robots, Catholic School uniforms and everyone looks like bug eyed Caucasians?"
"There's more to it than that, sir."
"I'll just bet there is," the detective in neutral retort scanning some of the more questionable figs. "From where I stand, some of it looks like gateway child porn."
"Oh c'mon Joe," Streebek to the young mans' 'rescue'. "It's a whole hobby with its own worldwide following. The deviant types' in it aren't that many. Though ... the deceased here looks to be a good example of what to look out for."
"You seem to know a little about it yourself." Wry grin on the older detectives' face.
"Not really. The last anime I bothered to watch was back in the mid-eighties ... Uh ... Robo-Tech, I think."
Ignoring the paramedic muttering something about "old school mecha" under his breath, Streebek continued.
"Well ... As a favor to my youngest sister I escorted my nieces at anime conventions a coupla' times. I at least know enough to ID the character on the decedents' shirt ... It's an electric rat or something ... Sorta' kinda' ironic when you think about it ... Uh ... something like ... Pickatyou-?"
"Eh ... Pikachu."
Both detectives turned to the paramedic.
"Pokemon was a show I watched as a kid," he explained. "The franchise still going strong ... Mainly for kids."
"Not from what I saw at those cons. Some of those masquerade types, uh-"
"Cosplayers."
"Yeah ... cosplayers. They went all out with the costumes. Some really explicit. My neices ID-ed just about every character depicted. Looked up some of the shows ... Pokemon's okay but I warned my sister the kids shouldn't be watching some of the others. The girls haven't forgiven me since."
"Cosplayers ... anime ... Pokermon ... Melancholy of Haruhi ... uh ... Hirohito? ... borderline kiddie porn ... ," Friday speculating. "I take it the deceased was filming this for the net or something, correct?"
"Could be," Streebek semi-concluding. "Two cameras ... wanted to get as many uh ... 'angles' ... judging by the two cameras ... wasn't satisfied with just a Yoo Tube style cellphone shoot ... "
Fridays' partner strode gingerly around the cadaver and "movie set" and up to the computer desk.
"Probably has editing programs. Bet he has a Patronising or Devianceart account or something else like that."
The sound of descending footsteps had one and all looking out at cellar steps. The aforementioned paramedic from floor above leading two stretcher bearing men.
"Gentlemen from County Coroners' Office here to pick up-," the paramedic nodded toward the prostrate subject.
"Go ahead," replied Friday unpocketing his phone.
Eyebrow lifted, Streebek looked on inquiringly.
"Gonna' see if I can get Doc Quincy and Sam put a priority on this one," the older gumshoe in response. "Looks pretty much conclusive but ..."
"Curious?"
"Yeah."
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The next day had my partner and I back in Homicide again doing follow-ups and later paperwork when after lunch that afternoon the autopsy report from previous days' call came in.
"Well ... Looks like this is it." Friday in declaration. "As we thought."
The older tossed the sheaf of papers onto the desk abutting against his. Picking up, Streebek examined in quick scan.
"Y'know Joe ... , " the younger tossing the report back. "We've partnered off and on since-"
"1987."
"Yeah ... That long eh?"
"That long."
"We've seen a LOT of things. Mostly what you'd expect in police work ... Dark side of humanity and all," mused Streebek. "Some of it pretty sordid ... Even worse than this ...
"But this has got to be the dumbest, most STUPID, most ... uh-"
"Pathetic."
"Yeah ... capitol P pathetic ... way of inadvertently doing ones' self in I've EVER seen. This is really one for the Darwin Awards."
"Yes, pathetic," punctuated Friday. "And not just his death."
"I've an idea what you mean."
"The way the body looked. Obese ... soft ... probably looked that way since childhood," the older detective went on, "lived in his mothers' basement, an overly protective/possessive single parent."
"Pretty stereotypical."
"Uh huh ... Neighbors say he was odd ... quiet. Probably bullied in school."
"That hobby of his!"
"Yeah ... that ... hobby of his." Musing Friday. "Found his own little world to withdraw into. A fantasy of his own to escape from that of what he thought a cruel reality.
"Had to be a small fortune spent on it."
"All those comic books, cartoons ... movies 'n models."
"Not to mention what they found on his computer."
Both grimaced. Though nothing on the hard drive or in any of the other media fit the legal definition of child pornography, a lot of that ... "hentai" ... certainly upped the "creep factor".
"Well ... Takes all sorts ... all kinds. Different ways folks have keeping themselves going. REALLY different sorts."
"So what keeps you going Joe?"
"You know me Pep." Friday in faux wonder how his partner could forget. "Connie ... the kids ... grandkids ..."
He held his hands up an out.
"My job as a cop."
"Not to mention," adding Streebek, "a brew, a chili dog ... and a Sunday Angels game on the screen."
"You got THAT right mister!"
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On the morning of Friday, May Seven, 2021, an autopsy was conducted on the remains of Phillip Thomas Oskarsbourg by the Coroners office in and of the County of Los Angeles.
In a moment ... The results of that examination.
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Subject: Phillip Thomas Oskarsbourg, white male, 5'9", 230 3/4 lbs.
Pronounced dead at scene.
Cause of death: Heart failure by electrically induced ventricular fibrillation from contact with 120 volt house current source.
Official cause of death: Death by misadventure.
END
Storyline (only) copyright © 5-1-21 C V Ford
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1. incel - "Involuntary celibate" Usually referred to as men with bad personalities, hostile to women but this writer thinks could also be attributed to lonely, shy and/or "weird" types who feel they are unattractive to women.
2. "dog and cat" - Pair of police officers, one male, one female.
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Disclaimer: The preceding is a NON-PROFIT work of fan fiction for entertainment purposes only. I make no claim to ownership of the names/characters, places and events mentioned in this work that are the intellectual properties of others. They are the sole properties of their respective owners. Please, by all means support the owners of such properties in the purchase and enjoyment of their works.