A/N: So to pass them time until the crossover I of course had to write my own fic based on the pic Mariska posted and Olivia and Elliot at Fin's wedding. I had a hard time with it because we don't know where they stand until the crossover but here it is. Happy Reading!

/

He'd wandered away from the crowd. He was happy for his friend but there was an ache in his chest that he feel tightening and suffocating. He watched from a distance and he wasn't sure what bothered him. Yes, it was difficult to see a happy couple after everything that had happened but at the same time for him and Kathy it was obligation. They were still kids and she was pregnant. Yes, he loved her but sometimes he wondered if she hadn't gotten pregnant would they have stayed together? Would he have joined the corps? Would he have become a cop? He wanted to fly to the moon. Maybe become architect. Seeing Fin and Phoebe together simply because they wanted to be. No circumstance forcing or obligating them. Two people who reconnected and found happiness. He had done right by Kathy when he left SVU. They had loved Rome and were happy and he was glad they had that. But what had it cost him? He noticed her talking with Phoebe and Amanda. She was smiling and laughing. Something he suspected she didn't do much anymore. She seemed to carry the weight of it all on her shoulders. Time, age, and the job stealing a piece of her. When she was younger he knew how much she cared and how much all of it ate at her sometimes but she still managed to smile and joke around. Maybe being CO made her harder. He stared out at the city from the rooftop, sighing as he took a drink of the beer he'd been nursing.

"Hey." He heard her voice from behind him

He turned and offered a smile, "Hey."

"I wondered where you'd snuck off to." She commented, "You okay?"

"Yeah, just needed a breather." He replied

"Elliot, I know this is probably not easy for you. I don't think anyone would fault you if you want to leave." She assured him

He shook his head, "No, no. I'm fine. I'm just thinking. I've had a lot of time to do that since…we talked at the diner."

"Elliot-"

"Liv, I loved Kathy. I know I did right by her after I left. But it also cost me. It cost me you."

"You don't need to…"

"I do Liv. I do. I meant what I said that night. When you were there with the kids. I do love you. I have for a long time. That's why I knew if I talked to you I'd never be able to leave. Not because I thought you'd talk me out of it. But because I knew I wouldn't, couldn't, deny those feelings. I know what a coward I was."

"You weren't a coward. Yes, it hurt. And in some ways still does. But I get it."

"Liv, I'm not saying I'm at place where I could…but…"

"Elliot…I…"

He shook his head, "Right, I mean I'm just assuming that you…I mean after everything. I know you don't really trust me any…"

She put a finger to his lips, "I love you too, El."

The DJ began playing another song and he raised his eyebrows in question. She smiled as she sat her drink down on the ledge and took his beer from his hands and put it down. He wrapped his arms around her waist and she placed hers around his neck and they swayed to the music. Their foreheads touching.

Have I told you lately that I love you

Have I told you there's no one else above you

You fill my heart with gladness

Take always all my sadness

You ease my troubles

That what you do